It was very warm. Too warm to be comfortable. A sticky heat that forced me to open my eyes much sooner than I would have wanted.
My sleep had been dreamless, the best night's sleep I had gotten in a long time. Apparently Madam Pomfrey had a vast stock of dreamless sleep potions in the Hospital Wing, there had been a huge demand for the majority of the students over the past year. A lot of nightmares had needed to be prevented. I had to find myself thankful for this, as it meant there was enough to go round for all the survivors of the final battle.
I had survived. Harry had survived. Ron had survived. It was more than I had allowed myself to hope for during the last year, it had seemed impossible to me that we all would make it.
But we didn't all make it. There were many fallen heroes in Hogwarts tonight.
I stopped this thought dead in its tracks, no matter the nightmares I had faced both in reality and in dreams, I did not have enough courage to face the facts right now.
I had still not moved since waking. I lay facing upwards towards the bed's canopy that was glistening a violent red in the sunlight. But the heat of the sun that had woken me was now becoming painful to my already burnt skin. But if I got up this would be a step closer to confronting the damage, maybe I could lie down just a little bit longer.
I turned my head to survey the rest of the room. I was in the boy's dormitory, but its appearance was completely different to what it would have been this time yesterday. There had been no spell damage done to GriffindorTower, and to step into it yesterday and to see it exactly as I had remembered had been like entering a safe haven after the storm. The only question on all of our minds when we stepped through the portrait hole was where were we going to sleep? None of us wanted to be separated, so I agreed to sleep with Harry and Ron up in the boy's dormitory. As soon as we walked through the door we heard a small pop and saw the room had expanded itself and a new bed had been magically added. Seamus, Dean and Neville were already there, they gave us a smile and a nod when we entered, but then continued getting ready for bed.
Apparently there seemed to be a feeling of safety in numbers as we were soon joined by Ginny accompanied by Luna, who explained the Fat Lady had made no objection to a Ravenclaw entering the tower today. Then, shortly after, came Parvati with her sister Padma, who also could not bear to be separated. Each time the room grew bigger and provided another bed for each occupant.
At the sight of the twins I noticed Ron clearly flinch, but without another word, without getting changed or even washing the blood and grime from ourselves, we all drank our dreamless sleep potions and welcomed the oblivion until morning.
I quickly scanned all the beds now and saw that no one had yet left the room, and it appeared to me that I was the only one visibly awake. The heat of the sun was now too much for my skin, it was time to get up whether I liked it or not. I gingerly got out of bed, but as soon as I put some weight on my left leg I stumbled, a sharp pain in my knee making me gasp and clutch the bed frame for support.
This disturbance wakes Ron, but no one else in the room stirs. I see his eyes blinking open, and that brilliant blue soothes me, if only for a moment.
"Hey," he whispers.
"Hi," I quietly respond.
There is nothing else to say, there is no combination of words to convey our emotions, nor any phrase that would alleviate our pain or express the happiness that both of us made it. Every word in the English language is insignificant to what we are feeling.
I hate myself for waking him up, he was safe and protected from his thoughts while in the velvety soft blackness of the dreamless sleep.
We continue to stare at each other for an immeasurable amount of time, each breath we take a valuable gift, each heartbeat a priceless privilege.
"You okay?" I ask. Then immediately regret it. Of course he isn't. None of us are. Stupid, stupid girl.
"Yeah, I think I need a glass of water though." His voice is husky I can tell from the long time spent sleeping, and he rises gracefully and crosses to the other side of the room where a jug of water and a few glasses lay waiting, untouched throughout the night.
I study him, he is in no obvious pain physically that I can see, apart from a few burns and scratches he appears largely unharmed. And I feel a wave of absolute relief that he made it, and I almost feel ashamed of myself for feeling this selfish joy.
Ron is taking a long drink of water and looking out the window to the grounds, so he is not able to see me, and by the time he has finished and turned to face me I have swallowed my elation and my grief, he doesn't need to see this. I can deal with this later.
He takes a step towards me, but then pauses again, unsure of how to proceed. But then Neville starts to stir and before long the whole room is awake, quietly talking and gently moving to shyly ease themselves into this unfamiliar world.
I am still clinging on to the bed post as my life raft, but I'm not sure whether I can trust my knee yet to take my weight so I sit back down. Harry sits himself at the end of his bed facing me and then Ron joins us and sits next to Harry. The silence between us is actually comfortable, we understand each other and we sit and wait.
Ginny is the first to leave the room, saying she is going to go find her mum. She shares a look with Harry and then gives me and Ron a sad smile before she goes. Slowly the room empties, until it is just me, Ron and Harry left.
Harry gives a great sigh, and then murmurs "Kreacher." With an instantaneous pop the house elf appears, bearing the first real smile I have seen all day on his face.
"Could you get us some sandwiches and juice please Kreacher, and bring them up here for us if you could?"
"Certainly Master," Kreacher replies and before I even have time to object he has Disapparated.
"Harry! He could have been resting! Don't you think he did enough last night to deserve some time to himself?" This feels good, but unusual. This is what Hermione would do. The regular Hermione. Maybe this is what we are supposed to do, just act like we used to until it feels right to do it. There has to be a point when all this will feel normal again.
"Come on, Hermione, you can't deny he looked happy to be helping us." And I couldn't, so we continued to sit in our comfortable silence. And when Kreacher came with the food we ate them together in the stillness. And when the time felt right, we all wordlessly agreed it was time for us to go downstairs.
