Love unmasked

Sharon Pugh

Chapter 1

Christine idly traced her finger along the line of the book she was currently reading, suddenly realising that she had read that line at least five times already. Shaking her head, she blinked a few times and tried, hopelessly to focus her attention on the words spread out in front of her. It was her favourite book, one that had always eased her mind in troubled times, one that she had read many times since the first night she had met......him.

Sensing the futility in her efforts, Christine closed the book, and placed it on the table beside her. How on earth could she try and concentrate on reading a book when there was so much activity going on throughout the chateau. However, she had promised Raoul. Promised him that she would stay away from the main rooms while the preparations for their engagement celebration were taking place.

Wondering what to do with herself next, she gazed around the library, at all of the rows upon rows of books that had probably not even been touched for years. She slowly rose up from the chair and sighed, wondering if she would manage to read all of them in her lifetime. After all, what else would she do in this magnificent chateau that she now called home. The grounds of the chateau seemed to stretch on forever but she had no need to tend to even a single flower, not even to pick a leaf up from the lawn. Everything was done, before she had even stirred from her bedchamber in the morning.

The chateau itself was magnificent, just like the castles in every fairytale her father had read to her when she was a child. She had always wondered what it would be like to be a princess of one of those fairytale castles and now, in essence, she was. Although she felt more like a pampered pet than a princess.

Finally succumbing to the fact that she simply couldn't remain hidden away in the library any longer, she slowly made her way towards the kitchen, feeling certain that there was something she could do, no matter how small, to occupy her mind and stop her thoughts from wandering back..........back to those last few days at the Opera Populaire.

The pandemonium that greeted her as she entered the kitchen made her gasp. So many people, so much going on, chefs hurriedly throwing ingredients into huge pans and wiping sweat away from their brow, the sound of chopping and simmering and people hurrying everywhere around her. Just watching them rushing about made her feel quite giddy and exhausted. She could see Else, one of the kitchen maids who was manically darting from one side of the kitchen to the other preparing the ingredients for tonight's dinner. Then, she could see Claude, was anxiously looking at the food selection and occasionally making suggestions as to how it could be improved.

Sensing her presence was already a nuisance to all of the busy people in the kitchen, she stepped back into the corridor, hoping that she could be of some use elsewhere.

However, wherever she wandered, there were maids, and butlers scurrying around, frantically cleaning surfaces that were already gleaming and straightening pictures and all manners of furniture that really didn't need touching. Christine felt ashamed that she barely knew the names of half of these people who were rushing round for her and Raoul's benefit.

Finally, she entered the main room of the house and approached one of the maids who was frantically rubbing away a small, hardly noticeable mark on the piano, making sure there were not any further specks of dust to be seen.

"Please, let me help you. There must be something I can do"

"No madam" the maid looked most taken aback "It is our duty. The Viscount de Chagny doesn't want you to be troubled"

"Leave it all in our care Miss Daae" one of the other maids quipped "we all have strict instructions from the Viscount not to let you trouble yourself" she wiped a bead of sweat from her forehead and smiled "After all, you should be preparing for your Engagement Celebration"

Christine glanced over the maid's shoulder and could see Raoul gesturing wildly to another gentleman who was waving a piece of music in the air. She guessed that she should be preparing for the ball really but she couldn't stand to see all these people rushing around for her.

"I'm just not used to this kind of………" Christine couldn't find a word to describe the life she had been living since she and Raoul had made their love public knowledge. She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly "I'm not accustomed to people pampering me"

"You should get accustomed to it" Meg happily skipped into the room and embraced Christine "This chateau is every little girl's dream, its beautiful Christine"

"Oh Meg!" Christine smiled and returned the embrace "Its so good to see you. You look wonderful!"

"Thank you" Meg twirled around to show off the dress "I haven't worn this for ages, its my favourite"

"I am glad you are here, I was starting to think I would go crazy, wandering around the chateau" Christine admitted "Where's mother?"

Christine had always been used to thinking of Madame Giry as her mother, she had loved her and cared for her, almost as if she had been her own child ever since she had arrived at the Opera Populaire.

"She is around somewhere" Meg gazed around the room and took her friend's hand "You can't possibly be without something to do. There must be so much to explore"

"I want to do something to help, to do something useful" Christine shrugged and lowered her voice "Raoul won't let me do anything for this ball. I so badly need something to take my mind off......"

Meg frowned and looked questioningly at Christine

"You are getting married in four weeks Christine. Should that not be enough to…….." Meg faltered. She really didn't want to be the one to revive the Phantom in Christine's mind.

"You can talk about it, please do" Christine sighed "Its not as if.......its not as if I don't think about it......about him."

Christine walked towards the window that overlooked the chateau's beautiful gardens, anxious to continue their conversation away from the maids, who were no doubt wishing they could hear every word. Meg followed, and placed her hand, soothingly on Christine's arm.

"Christine, everything will be alright" she whispered. "In time"

"Everything is alright, it really is. I am so happy, how could I possibly be anything but happy. Look at me, look at this place." Christine forced a smile "I just can't help feeling…….."

Christine trailed off as Raoul approached them. His smile beaming, he threw his arms around the two girls.

"Are you talking about the ball?" without waiting for their response, he carried on excitedly, "It's going to be magnificent Christine. Our ballroom is breathtaking, there have been people working solidly on it for over a week. Its like a palace!"

Ballroom. That was another thing that Christine found hard to take in. She had spent most of her life living in a small room with many other girls at the opera house and to suddenly have acquired a ballroom, drawing room, dining hall and all the other many rooms in Raoul's Chateau was overwhelming.

Her favourite room of the whole chateau was her bedchamber, it had been decorated the previous week in all of Christine's favourite colours and patterns. It felt wonderful and yet slightly unnerving to have a whole room all to herself. However, she wouldn't have long to grow accustomed to that, in four weeks she would be sharing Raoul's bedchamber, as his wife, Christine De'Chagny.

As the thought of her impending marriage entered her mind, she felt the usual mix of emotions that came with it. Excitement, confusion, elation, anxiety and the usual fluttering sensation in her stomach. She smiled as she wondered how delighted her father would be to see all this. He had been very fond of Raoul whenever he had visited her at that little cottage by the sea all those years ago. So many years ago and yet, here she was, engaged to Raoul, her childhood sweetheart. She had barely even entertained the hope of ever seeing him again in her lifetime, let alone being his bride.

After the Opera House had been destroyed in the disaster, Christine had had no choice but to accept Raoul's offer to move into his Chateau and reside in a separate room until their wedding day. Not that she regretted it, not at all, it was just that her mind was a constant whirl of confusion lately.

It had been two months since the disaster and each and every night the Phantom had penetrated her dreams somehow. Last night, all she could remember dreaming was being in the gondola with the Phantom, the both of them singing beautifully. However, when she had looked up at the Phantom, all she could see was hurt and betrayal in his eyes, unlike when they had really been in the boat when he had looked at her so fondly, with such love and…….

Christine inwardly chided herself for these crazy thoughts and resolved to concentrate on the night's festivities.

"Oh Raoul, I'm sure it will be wonderful" She lightly kissed Raoul on the cheek and gazed into his beautiful brown eyes "but I feel so useless. People are rushing everywhere to get things prepared and I want to do something".

"Christine, please. You have plenty of things you could do" Raoul returned the kiss on Christine's lips then turned to Meg. "Take her to her room and help her to get ready Meg. Not that she needs very long to make herself beautiful"

"Yes, come Christine. I cannot wait to see your dress" Meg linked her arm through Christine's.

"Now I must go and talk to the conductor of the orchestra again" Raoul run his hands through his hair in exasperation. "Can you believe that he was thinking of including excerpts from Don Juan in tonight's selection?! How thoughtless"

"How inconsiderate" Christine sadly wished that maybe she could hear her angel's music one last time. But she knew now was not the time. "Did he not know of what happened?"

"We don't need our night marred by memories of HIM" Raoul had clearly not heard a word she had said, his facial features tightening "Not tonight of all nights"

"Tonight will be perfect" Christine tried to convince them both as she wrapped her fingers around his "Nothing can spoil it Raoul, nothing"

"There is one thing that really would make it the perfect night" Raoul's frown seemed to melt away as he looked upon his future bride "If you would indulge us all with your voice. There are so many people who are asking...."

"No" Christine spoke quickly, tearing her hand away from his "Please Raoul"

"Oh Christine!" Meg beamed "It has been so long since you sang"

"I don't understand" Raoul's eyes looked sad as he noticed the evident fear in his fiancee's eyes "I know you haven't sung since...."

He struggled to find the words to convince her

"Even without rehearsal, you have a far superior voice than anyone who will be present tonight" he pressed "It would give us great pleasure if you would sing for us.....for me"

"Oh no please!" Christine shook her head pleadingly "Don't make me sing. I couldn't. I haven't sung since that night.... don't make me do it now"

"Very well" Raoul kissed her gently on her forehead "I shan't press you any further. I must go, I have things to attend to"

With that, Raoul strode away, heading towards the already flustered conductor of the orchestra.

"Why will you not sing anymore?" Meg looked concerned "It seems such a waste. After everything that happened...."

"I just can't" Christine stopped her, all this talk was not helping her troubled mind at all "Please Meg, don't ask. I miss singing, I miss it with all my heart but, I caused so much...... so much pain, so much misery. I wish I had never...."

"No, you are wrong Christine" Meg interrupted "None of it was your fault, none of it"

"You know that's not true" Christine protested "If I had never sang, if he had never loved me...."

"You would still be a chorus girl" Meg concluded "And maybe Raoul would never have even noticed you, hidden away in the crowd. What happened, happened for a reason Christine, to ensure your future happiness, with Raoul"

"I hope I really can make Raoul happy" Christine admitted

"You already have by agreeing to marry him" Meg coaxed Christine along the long corridor towards her bedchamber. "Now come on Christine, I need to see your dress, no more talk of the past. There is so much to do"

Sensing her friend's reluctance, she slowed her pace and turned Christine to face her.

"Raoul really does love you so" Meg smiled "He just doesn't want you to feel hurt anymore. He wants it all to be over Christine"

"It is" Christine stopped "He knows that. He just can't keep hiding me away from everything, I am going to remember, how could I forget?"

"Well, put all that out of your mind tonight Christine, you need to celebrate your engagement to your very own Prince Charming" Meg wanted to draw Christine's thoughts away from the darkness of the past. She couldn't understand why Christine couldn't just lock these thoughts away. There were so many other things she could be thinking of.

Meg skipped ahead and giggled happily "the ball, your wedding, your future, its all looking so good Christine. I feel I could die of excitement for you"

"Oh Meg, I am so lucky to have you as a friend" she hugged her closely

"Time will heal everything you know" Meg took Christine's hand and led her into the room, closing the door behind her.

Outside her bedchamber, Christine could still hear the muffled voices of the busily finishing off last minute preparations. Drawing her attention to her dress, she smoothed it out on the bed for Meg to see.

"Its wonderful" Meg almost squeaked with excitement "You are going to look beautiful! You are so so lucky Christine"

Christine had to admit that Meg was right, she was lucky. She had a bright, rich future in front of her with the man she loved. She knew how much Raoul clearly loved her, more than life itself and what was in the past was just that. In the past. Something to be thought of with a mixture of fondness and regret.

So why then, did Christine feel such unease.