Chapter 1: Zuko
Lost, as usual, I try to regain my bearings. Trees and shades of pine tell me all I need to know. As I curse the very day that my father would take my one true meaning in life, I realize that this bright, shiny land has no light. No true light, no sun greets me in the west as the shadows indicate it would. Here there are no animals scurrying, no wind ruffling the leaves, certainly no clouds in the sky. Here there be dragons.
This I feel, in my mind, and I run from the forest of silence, I flee the sunless lands like the honor less bastard that I am. The clearing that I come to is in nighttime, I have run for miles. My heart cries out that this is where I will stay, but the last time that I listened to my heart, I lost blood, and skin, and nerves. And any hope of being loved by him. But I suppose that I should stop feeling sorry for myself. And this place calls out to me, somehow. I decide to listen, I decide to explore.
I walk the perimeter, looking for something. Finding nothing, I turn around and immediately find a hut, covered in animal skins and smelling strongly of what might be incense. Not noticing the strangeness of a shelter appearing out of nowhere, I enter. There is what you need here, for a price.
"I need to find the Avatar. I need to regain my honor." We can make the Avatar beg on his knees, grovel for your favor. This we have done before. This we can do again. The skins on the wall flap, though there is no wind, and a necklace appears. It is blue, with the water tribe symbol. All men have a similar weakness. He will do anything for her.
"But she hates me. I have her necklace, true, but it is disposable to her." There are more ways than bribery and material possessions to win a woman's heart. She can never love you, but she can love, or at least desire, ahem, a lovely piece of merchandise. Now I notice, in the middle of the room, a syringe and a vial of clear liquid. "What is your price?" The shelter, the clearing, the forest disappear and I am almost awake. I hear a deep, old voice calling from the distance. What you desire most will never be fully achieved.
But I just want the Avatar… Iroh stares at me blankly, like more is going on inside than it is outside. "What's that in your hand, nephew?" I flex my fingers, testing the newfound feeling of touch again. There is a syringe, and a vial. Apparently that wasn't just a dream. I have no qualms about lying to my Uncle. "It's a sleeping serum one of the guards gave me. I wasn't sleeping for the past two nights." Iroh raises his eyebrows, but even though my lie is obvious, he doesn't mention it. My plans might work now, and I smirk shamelessly and Uncle realizes that something has changed about me; I can see it in his simple eyes. I must remember that he is not so simple, that he doesn't have any reason to help me in my quest to regain my honor. Though he has promised to help me, I know he will refuse when he sees my plan. If he sees my plan. He won't see my plan. I know now that if he knows what I am planning, he will set another mark on my face. This is the worst thing that anyone could do to someone, but I have no honor, remember? I have no reason to behave like I do. Besides, she is a peasant. She is expendable. She doesn't even know what I will do to her; she won't while I'm doing it. Only afterwards will the truth of what has happened will come to her, and the girl won't care enough by that point.
Iroh wants, no, is going to a small port. We were there before, and every time I see a firebender, I hate my uncle a little more. Really, I know that it isn't his fault; I know that it's mine. But blaming me is just too hard right now. I wonder when it won't be.
He is lying about a Pai Sho tile. He was playing with it when he said that he lost it, I will continue my façade as a naïve child for now, this is what my father sent me to do, and I will not destroy my one opportunity for redemption.
There is a pirate ship where they talk about the Avatar now. The girl is of more focus though. This is perfect; the little wretch won't know what is coming to her. I am, after all, a soldier. Of the honorable Fire Nation. Even if I am not honorable, I am still a human being, and I am still loyal. I will regain my honor, and I have waited two years. I can wait a little longer, until he comes to me. Not necessarily by choice, of course. I will trick the pirates to get to her.
Uncle is surprised by my cunning, when I force the pirates to do my bidding. He continues "looking for his Pai Sho tile." I wish that I knew why he was lying. I guess that it really doesn't matter. I finally have time alone with her, I won't waste it.
I am face to face with the girl, smirking at her anger. She spits at me, the bitch, but I am not surprised. She has every reason to. As I yell at her to tell me where she is, and make a big show of it, she remains impassive.
I whisper at her ear, "You don't have to tell me now, peasant. I WILL break you."
Her eyes widen, and I start laughing when I realize what she is thinking of. Like I would waste my, ahem… don't tell anyone…virginity on THAT! "Don't worry, I'm not as bad as you think, girl. I won't destroy you that quickly, where's the fun in that?"
I pull out the needle, but she doesn't see, too busy trying to find out what's in my eyes that makes me so crazy. It's not the drugs; I'm not stupid enough to try them. It's the anticipation. As I roll up her sleeve, her eyes widen in surprise and…confusion? I forgot, she is a water tribe peasant, doesn't know about the temptation or the horrors of Dragon Lily Nectar. Grabbing her upper arm very tightly (she gasps with pain, shouldn't she be tough?), I inject the artificial pleasure.
