I remember it so vividly. The way he put his hands on me, the way his skin felt against mine, how we seemed to just connect perfectly. It was an experience so exhilarating, almost like I was back in the games; but I didn't want to run away, I didn't want to stop, I just craved more. I wanted him, all of him, and only him.
My eyes wandered his body. Seeing someone fully exposed in front of me would usually make me uncomfortable, but not this time. Mesmerized by his body and consumed in his eyes, next thing I know his hands are on me. Wearing nothing but pearls in my ears a hair tie on my wrist I was so vulnerable, but I felt so secure. His bare body was against mine. His lips made their way from my waist up to meet mine. He kissed me, over and over, and I kissed back. He pulled away and gave just enough time to flash me that killer smile and whisper, "You ok?" I couldn't take me eyes off him. I struggled to give a response, "Yeah…Yeah, I'm fine. Just don't stop."
He did that intriguing smirk again that I can't resist, "As you wish Ms. Everdeen." He continued as he kissed my neck. He was my escape from reality. His gorgeous blue eyes, his charming smile, his powerful amazing body, everything about him just made me want him more.
I don't know how to explain the feeling. It was pain, but it was a delicate, desirable pain. Seems so bad but so good, like the cream on my burns from the games. The feeling is worth it all.
I came back to reality and realized Peeta was hovering over me, "You good? You seem a little off." I looked down and realized I was shaking, and my eyes were watery. "Yeah of course. Better than ever." He smiled and lied down next to me. He was breathing heavy as he brushed the hair from my face. He had lost his frisky attitude, and stared into my eyes, "I find something so perfect, and I only have it for so long." I just smiled and kissed his cheek. He put his arm around me and I closed my eyes. I closed my eyes and the world disappeared, everything disappeared, and I was wrapped up, safe in his arms. As if we were the last people in Panem.
I tilted my head and looked up at his serene face, so flawless and explicit. I could stay in his arms forever, and never face the monstrous world that sits right outside the door. "Peeta I..." The sound of Effie Trinket's squeaky voice interrupted my train of thought, "Get up everyone! It's going to be a big, big, big day!" I was sucked back into reality. It's game time.
I was so sure that that would be it. That we would die, or at least I would, and leave the world on a positive note. But that's not what happened. Something much worse happened. I lived. We were all just pieces of the capitols silly games, and we still are. And now I'm looking through the glass windows, at another hopeless patient; another one of the capitol's creations.
I wanted so badly to run to him. To wake up and realize this was all a dream. To protect him the way he always protected me. But I just sat and watched; watched the stranger, who used to be my only reason to live. I watched as he struggled against the restraints, with tears streaming down his face as he shouted vicious words I couldn't bare to hear. All I could think was "That's not him. No, that's not him. That is not Peeta. It's not him." I couldn't grasp the concept that, that boy, the one who means more to me than I can imagine, isn't coming back. He's lost. And now I'm lost too.
