Disclaimer: It is with a heavy heart that I admit that I don't own Harry Potter.
Author's Note: Written for controlled climb, courtesy of the Gift-Giving Extravaganza. I hope you enjoy it!
Lee moved between the shelves of Weasley's Wizard Wheezes, making sure that everything was in order. He had been working at the joke shop since George had started to get it up and running again, nearly three years ago. Originally, he had just planned to help George get back on his feet, but he had found himself staying on, long after George was functioning relatively normally again. Lee knew he could probably get something that paid much more - being a veteran of the Second Wizarding War who had fought in the Battle of Hogwarts did have its perks, after all - but he liked his job, and he thought that was far more important than money.
He leaned over and checked the containers of Skiving Snackboxes. A few of them seemed to be a little emptier than he should, and he straightened up, planning to get some more from the back before he opened up the shop to customers. Skiving Snackboxes were one of the most popular items in the shop - cheap, easily hidden, and intensely useful.
As Lee started to leave the aisle, he heard a creak. The noise might have been inaudible in any other instance, but the joke shop was completely silent - and so was most of Diagon Alley, since it was early enough that none of the stores were officially open yet. Lee froze, drawing his wand. Chances were, it was simply the building settling, but he wasn't going to risk anything. The war had created a generation full of jumpy, on-edge young men and women who saw danger in every corner.
Seconds later, a dark shape barreled into Lee's field of vision. He threw up a Shield Charm, but the attacker broke it with one curse. Lee couldn't see the person's face; it was covered by a dark mask. "Avada Kedavra!" the man yelled. Lee flung himself aside, slamming into the shelf and dislodging a large number of products onto his head and torso.
He cursed, sending a Stunning Spell at the man, but he blocked it easily, returning fire with a number of curses Lee didn't even recognize. It took all his concentration to defend against the barrage of spells, and although he wanted to fight back, he simply wasn't capable of getting any offensive spells in with the defensive ones. His mind flashed back to the Battle of Hogwarts, fighting for his life against Death Eaters. He had thought, after the Battle, that he was safe -
Although Lee found himself unable to perform any offensive spells, he let himself back away from the man's attacks as he defended himself, slowly walking backwards towards the front door. When he was two feet away, he lunged, crashing through the door and out onto Diagon Alley, where a couple of the neighboring storeowners instantly popped out to see what was going on.
For a second, Lee could see the man running toward the back of Weasley's Wizard Wheezes, probably so that he could leave through the back window or back door - and then, he was gone.
Being questioned by the Aurors sucked.
It wasn't that they treated him like a suspect. Oh, no - they understood that he was the victim here, and they didn't blame him at all, and they believed his story and wanted to find the bloke who had tried to kill him.
It wouldn't have been so bad if they didn't insist on going over the most monotonous details possible.
Lee half-expected them to ask for a list of what he had eaten for dinner for the past week. They asked every question he could possibly imagine (including a few he didn't want to imagine, mainly involving his personal life and whether he had jilted any lovers lately). He appreciated the time, but he still wished that the interrogation could just be done already.
When the Auror in charge - who Lee had internally nicknamed Auror McBoss - stood up, Lee breathed a sigh of relief. "Are we done?"
"You're done being questioned," McBoss said, "but because of the risk to your life, we're going to have a guard stay with you for a little while to ensure that this doesn't happen again. She should be down in a minute."
Lee wasn't completely sure what to think about that. On one hand, he liked the idea of having protection; on the other hand, he wasn't so sure about having some mystery woman supervise his every move. The idea was just a little awkward. He couldn't help it, but his first thought was that he wouldn't be able to get laid for as long as he was being guarded - and then he felt ridiculous, since being alive and sexually frustrated was far better than being dead and satisfied.
The door opened suddenly, and a woman stepped inside. She was close to Lee's age, maybe slightly older, with short curly hair that hung around her face. "This is Agent Penelope Clearwater, with the Hit-Wizard division of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement," McBoss said. "She'll be your main guard during the normal hours, although we'll have someone else covering you during the night."
"And you're Lee Jordan," Penelope said, looking directly at him. She was pretty enough, he supposed, even though she didn't do anything to accentuate that - no makeup, nothing fancy done with her hair, and no flattering clothes. "I remember you - you were the Quidditch commentator at Hogwarts."
He nodded, unable to stop the slight smile from forming. Even though Hogwarts was years behind him, he still couldn't help but enjoy when someone recognized him as the old commentator. It was one of his claims to fame, at least among the generation of students who had been there while he was the Quidditch commentator. "That was the good days," he said, standing up. "Were you in Gryffindor?"
"No," she said, "so sometimes I found your bias slightly irritating. Come on - we're going to a safe house."
"A what?" Lee looked back and forth between her and Auror McBoss. "We can't stay at my flat?"
"Absolutely not," Penelope said. "It's not safe. Because of the nature of the attack, it's assumed that this was not random. We believe that there's someone after you specifically - and this means that you can't live a normal life until this person is caught."
"Which will be when?"
"We don't have it mapped out," Penelope said, a bit of snippiness in her tone. "A team of skilled Aurors is currently investigating, and your case is now one of the Auror Office's top priorities, thanks to your status as a veteran of the Second Wizarding War." She offered her hand to him. "Come on. We're Apparating to the safe house."
Lee slid his hand into Penelope's, and within a second, they had disappeared from the Ministry.
They appeared in the backyard of a normal-looking, albeit slightly small, house. A high fence surrounded the entire backyard - even Lee, at nearly six feet tall, couldn't see over the fence without jumping. Penelope drew her wand and gestured toward the house, letting Lee follow her. She was moving cautiously, but Lee was almost certain that it was unnecessary - there was no way they would send him to the safe house if it hadn't already been checked. Penelope was just being the overly cautious guard that she was getting paid to be.
As soon as Penelope had checked the entire house and set up wards, the two of them sat down at the kitchen table. The house was small enough so that it didn't have a dining room; instead, the table was in the kitchen, crammed into the small room along with a refrigerator, oven, and far too many cupboards. Lee peered into a couple of the cupboards. They were all well-stocked, which he supposed made sense - it wouldn't exactly be smart for either him or Penelope to leave and go grocery shopping, after all.
"So," Lee said, looking at Penelope, "what exactly does a Hit-Wizard - er, sorry, Hit-Witch - do?"
It was a perfectly reasonable question. The Hit-Wizard division was known for occasionally assisting Aurors on investigations, but the most Lee knew about them was that they were all skilled, trained badasses. Looking at Penelope, it wasn't hard to believe that - she had the same no-nonsense, tough look about her that he had seen on many of the Aurors.
She stood up and set some water on the stove for tea. "We're tasked with the more dangerous criminals," she said. "We never deal with burglary or other petty offenses. The Aurors investigate dangerous crimes as well, but when it comes time to actually go after one of these people, there's always at least a couple of us on the team. And, if it's absolutely necessary, and it's impossible to bring a dangerous witch or wizard in for questioning, then we're tasked with..." She hesitated as if trying to find a good way to say it. "We're tasked with killing them."
Lee's mind instantly jumped to Penelope, wearing a dark, tight-fitting catsuit and sneaking around like a ninja - sneaking into someone's bedroom, even. "So you're assassins?"
"It's rare," Penelope said. "And get your mind out of the gutter - it's not as glamorous as you want it to be."
Lee could feel heat rising in his cheeks. "How did you know what I was thinking?"
"I'm trained to observe people," she said. "You had this look on your face, and I could tell you were thinking something inappropriate."
Oh, wonderful. I'm living with a veritable mind-reader. Lee raised his eyebrows. "You always do this to people you just meet?"
Penelope turned slightly, and Lee could see a flush on her cheeks. "I told you - I'm trained. It's a habit now, basically."
She poured him a cup of tea, letting the bag sit in the mug as she handed it to him. "Thanks," he said. "So what made you become a Hit-Witch, anyway?" To Lee, it didn't seem like the sort of profession that just anybody would choose, much less make it through training. He had seen several people attempt to enter the Aurors after the war, and many of them had ended up dropping out soon after. If the Hit-Wizard division was even more badass and tough than the Aurors...
"The war, mostly," Penelope said. "I wanted to be able to defend myself and others. I wanted to help protect people from the bad that's out there." She shrugged. "Pretty standard answer, I guess - you've probably heard it from some of the other survivors."
Lee nodded. He had heard it before, but that wasn't necessarily a bad thing - he supposed there were only so many reasons a person could have for wanting to join the Hit-Wizard division or the Aurors, and Penelope's answer was far better than some of the vengeance-driven reasons that other people had. "Why the Hit-Wizard division?" he asked next. "I mean, the Aurors were wiling to let anyone into training, even if they didn't have the necessary OWLs or NEWTs."
"I had the requirements to be a Hit-Witch," Penelope said. "I figured if I was going to take the risk of working in the DMLE, then I might as well go all the way." She laughed, a slightly self-deprecating sound. "I've always been a bit overly ambitious, I guess."
"Slytherin?" Lee guessed. Even as he said it, he doubted it was true - Penelope didn't fit the mold of a Slytherin, in his opinion. He supposed he was a little biased against them, after the war - he knew he certainly wasn't the only one. Post-war, many people had become prejudiced against Slytherins the same way that many Slytherins were prejudiced against Muggle-borns, and Lee was no exception to that general rule.
She shook her head. "Ravenclaw. I'm Muggle-born. And -" a slight smirk crossed her face -"I know you were in Gryffindor, since you could never shut up about it while you were commentating Quidditch games."
Lee chuckled. His bias toward the Gryffindor team had been partially because of his loyalty to them and partially to annoy McGonagall (and the non-Gryffindor students). "Oh, you know you loved it," he teased, taking a sip of his tea.
Penelope rolled her eyes. "Still the same jokester from Hogwarts, hmm?" She seemed like she was trying to suppress a smile. "So you're working in Weasley's Wizard Wheezes?"
"Yeah. George is my best friend, and I thought I should help him out - and then I didn't end up leaving." He shrugged. "I couldn't really work in the Ministry or anything like that. DMLE's too much effort, and everywhere else just seems so damn boring. At least the joke shop is interesting."
"Nothing more interesting than corrupting the minds of young children." Penelope still seemed slightly amused by Lee. Better than being annoyed at him. Maybe being here with her in the safe house wouldn't be so bad. In the beginning - before he had even seen her - he had expected someone far older and stuffier, someone who did nothing but stand against the wall and stare creepily at him. Penelope was an engaging companion, and he appreciated that.
"Exactly!"
She shook her head, finally letting a smile break free. "You're something, you know that?"
"Oh, believe me, I do know."
Penelope rolled her eyes again, but she was chuckling.
Penelope stayed until around nine at night, at which point she was replaced by a Hit-Wizard named Albert Janson, an older bloke who seemed to communicate entirely through grunts. Lee wondered if Janson was part-troll; at any rate, he seemed to have the intelligence of one. Already, he missed Penelope. Not only was she far more nice to look at than fifty-year-old male Janson, but she was also a good conversationalist, lively and engaging and sharp. Janson bored him, and even Lee - perpetual night owl, whose idea of 'early' was around midnight or one in the morning - found himself trying to go to sleep at eleven, in the hope of the morning coming sooner - and bringing Penelope with it.
He was laying in bed for a good hour and a half before he finally drifted off - consequences of never going to bed that early, he supposed. When he woke up seven hours later, Penelope was already there, sipping from a Thermos full of coffee and flipping through a magazine. Lee rubbed sleep out of his eyes and sat up. "You're here early."
"I happened to wake up early," Penelope said. "So I decided to come in. You are technically my assignment, after all - not Janson's."
"Why are the Hit-Wizards guarding me, and not Aurors?"
Penelope shrugged. "We deal with dangerous criminals, remember? The Aurors are capable of guarding you, but because of the nature of your case, it's also our assignment. And since we don't usually do investigating, that leaves us with guarding you." She set the magazine down on the end table and stood up. "So you can't think of anyone who'd actually be after you?"
Lee shook his head. He couldn't think of anybody who he had wronged or slighted enough for them to do this. There were people at Hogwarts who hadn't particularly liked him, but most of that dislike had been based off of him being an extremely biased Gryffindor - something that certainly wasn't worth killing over. The only other option he could think of was that one of the Death Eaters or Death Eater sympathizers who hadn't been caught had decided to go after some of the war survivors, starting with Lee, but even that seemed a little far-fetched.
"Damn," Penelope said. "Good luck to the Aurors, then. A lot of crimes are done by people close to the victim - and the victim often at least has a vague idea of people who might not like them. It's harder when there's nothing to go on."
She let Lee get dressed, averting her eyes but staying in the room. Lee hurried as much as he could, trying to get out of the awkward situation, but that only resulted in him putting his shirt on backwards and having to take it off and fix it. When he finally finished, he saw a slight smile on Penelope's face. "Like what you see?" he teased.
"I've seen worse." She led him into the kitchen, where they both bustled around to make breakfast. Lee was tempted to take a swig of Penelope's coffee, but decided that messing with a badass Hit-Witch should only go so far.
"So who am I hotter than?" Lee asked, slightly rephrasing Penelope's earlier statement so it sounded more flattering to him.
She raised an eyebrow at him. "I'm not discussing my sex life with you, Jordan." She threw an apple at him; he caught it with one hand, wiped it on his shirt, and took a large bite out of it.
"Not asking for details," Lee said, "although I wouldn't exactly be opposed to hearing them. I just was curious who you've seen that's not as hot as me."
"You're a nosy little shit," Penelope said. "And for your information, you're better-looking than Percy Weasley."
"You had sex with Percy Weasley?" Lee honestly didn't know what to do with that information. The idea of Percy Weasley having sex was revolting; the idea of Percy Weasley having sex before Lee was impossible. The idea of Penelope Clearwater having sex was...not revolting or impossible. It was actually a very nice mental image - Lee tried to force those thoughts out of his head before he got to the point of needing a cold shower.
"No," Penelope said. "We didn't go all the way, for your information. And I think I should tell you to get your mind out of the gutter again." She slid him a cup of coffee and sat down across from him, picking at her breakfast. "Is this going to become a habit?"
"Probably."
"Any news from the Aurors?" Lee asked on the afternoon of the third day. He was pacing around the living room, half-tempted to make a run for it. Penelope was great company, but that didn't change the fact that being stuck in a house all the time was terribly boring. Lee wanted to get out; he wanted to go and work at the joke shop, and he wanted to see some of his other friends. He didn't necessarily want to stop seeing Penelope, of course - but he wanted to stop being a prisoner.
She looked noncommittal. "They might have something."
"What do they have?"
"Something," Penelope said teasingly.
"You're not nice."
"I know." Penelope chuckled. "In all honesty, though, it's pretty flimsy as of right now. Quality Quidditch Supplies reported that one of their employees was late the morning of your attack. The timeframe was almost perfect - the employee had just enough time to go and attack you, escape, clean himself up, and show up to work."
"Who is it?"
Penelope sighed. "I swear, you're the most curious bloke I have ever seen in my whole life."
"Is that a compliment?"
"Maybe," Penelope said, her voice perfectly neutral. "Anyway, the man's name is Marcus Flint. He's around our age - his Hogwarts years overlapped with ours a bit."
"Have you people captured him yet?"
Penelope shook her head. "No. Once the Aurors started sniffing around the store, he disappeared - hasn't been seen for a while. That doesn't always mean guilt, although it's a pretty good sign. People with nothing to hide don't run from the Aurors. But we don't necessarily know that he's hiding your attack - he could just be involved in something totally different."
"Flint was in Slytherin," Lee said. "One of the Quidditch players." He remembered many of their names - six straight years as the commentator had left him with relatively extensive knowledge of the Quidditch players. "Ugly bloke, if I'm remembering right."
"Any grudge against you?"
Lee shrugged. "He was a Slytherin - so the usual House rivalry, I guess. And I did insult him a few times while I was commentating, but no worse than any of the other players. So maybe he's just jealous of my undeniable wit and great good looks."
"Or maybe he found you annoying enough to kill," Penelope retorted, twirling a strand of hair around her finger. "I think that's definitely possible."
"Oh, who are you kidding?" Lee said. "You adore me."
"I adore when your mouth is shut."
"My mouth has so many talents," Lee said. "It's a shame to let them all go to waste."
"You are such a teenage boy," Penelope said. He saw a slight flush on her cheeks; his obvious innuendo had obviously not gotten by her.
"I won't deny that," Lee said. He stopped pacing and leaned against the opposite wall from Penelope. "Can I ask you a serious question?"
She ran a hand through her hair. "You probably will anyway, regardless of what I say, but oh well. Ask away, I guess."
"Do you actually think I'm annoying?" Lee tried to look flippant, like he didn't care what Penelope's response was one way or another, but it was hard. For some reason, he actually cared what this woman - this badass Hit-Witch who could probably throw him across a room without a wand - thought of him. He actually cared what her opinion was. He was interested in her - and he was interested in her for more than sex (although he wouldn't deny himself; that was a part of it). He wasn't used to this with women; most of his girlfriends had been little more than one-night stands or friends with benefits. He wasn't really a relationship bloke - but he might find himself making an exception for Penelope.
"You're not extremely mature," Penelope admitted, "but it's a bit endearing."
"I'm endearing?"
Penelope's cheeks were flushed again, and she looked as though she wasn't sure whether to continue along this line of conversation or not. "Maybe a little bit."
Lee took a deep breath, and mustered up all of his Gryffindor courage. "Are you feeling as much romantic and sexual tension as I am right now?"
Penelope crossed the room quickly and stood right in front of him, hands on either side of his body, effectively pinning him to the wall. "You are a nosy, immature little shit," she said. "And I have no bloody idea why I like it."
Lee wasn't sure who moved forward first, but within less than a second, their lips were meeting. Her hands tangled in his hair; his hand cupped the back of her neck. She tasted like coffee and flavored lip gloss. Lee could feel the wiry muscles of her back as his other hand dipped lower, and she let out a sound, somewhere between a sigh and a moan, against his lips.
She pulled away from him, and he could see that teasing spark again in her eyes. "Yep," she said, "definitely better than Percy." He leaned forward to kiss her again - after all, she obviously hadn't minded - but she put a hand against his chest. "Look," she said. "For some reason - some reason that I have no idea how to explain - I think I fancy you. But I can't let myself get distracted right now - at least not while I'm guarding you. If I let myself get too comfortable, too carried away...I won't be paying attention to my surroundings. I won't be protecting you, and that's my job." Her eyes were still lit up, though, and Lee stared at her, waiting for her to continue.
"And..."
"So we just have to wait," she said. "I promise you, as soon as Flint - or whoever attacked you - is caught, and as soon as you're safe..." She leaned forward and kissed him again, this time shorter. "We'll take a rain check. We'll be seeing each other long after you're safe."
Lee grinned. "Sounds good to me."
