Just a pointless little drabble I made up. Slight Howince.

Disclaimer:I do not own The Mighty Boosh


Howard T.J Moon was angry. Like a precharging rhino. Oh no, he wasn't angry because yet another woman had rejected his jazz charm, I mean who would have guessed woman didn't like jokes about bagpipes and squids. How she managed to get through that with a straight face I'll never know. No, it wasn't because his haunting muffin roll neck didn't match his quizzical fawn cord trousers, he knew that morning he should have gone with the aggressive nutmeg.
No, the reason for his anger, which at this point was bubbling like hot taffy, was the absence of a certain futuristic prostitute, his silver owl of a friend, the man who made Bowie look human, the love child of Rod Stewart and a raven. It's not like Vince being late is abnormal, in fact if he was ever on time I'd be worried that he'd been taken by one of those brain switching aliens you read about in the Daily Mail. (And we all know that's a great source of information.) No, it was because his absence happened to fall on what the futuristic prostitute liked to call super fun friend night, or Wednesday to any other normal human being would call it. So he commenced on watching the National Geographic's latest gripping documentary on the features on the many arthropods of the earth, today's episode featured the arthropods named from H-O.
About an hour or so in to the gripping world of arthropod's named after the letter I he heard the clicking of distinct Cuban heels on the stairs up to the flat. He did not need to question the owner of the glittery silver boots he caught thought the gap in the stair cares railing as he glance in the direction. The glitter ball shoes cast a small rainbow on the floor as they moved closer to the resident of the couch. He looked up at his counterpart, small anteater eyes trained on bright star shined ones as he flipped out his trust rampant nutmeg coloured note pad from the back of his cord.
"So?.. What was it this time?" For a few seconds the question hung in the air between them, awkward and heavy like Bob Fossil.
Howard feeling his molten hot anger come bubbling up once more, like when an earth quake sets of a volcano it a rushing to the top.
"Really what was it? A sale at Topshop? A falcon came down stole your shoes and you had to borrow some from a toad? You got captured by a horde of wasp's, but once they took you back you gave their queen a makeover and they let you go free? What was it?"
It was then large anime like eyes seemed to fall back on to stony pits that flamed with annoyance. No, this was a not a new feeling when it came to his best mate. No, Vince just seemed to get off on his misery, in making Howard act a fool.
"Leroy's in hospital." The voice came out timidly, like a child who had just been punished severely for something their brother did.
"What?"
"Funny story actually. Well, until the end bit. When we went out last night, well Leroy pulled a bird. A big one, she reminded me a bit of that sea witch in the lil' mermaid. What's `er name? Well, don't matter. Well, she buggered off after a bit, don't think he's jokes were working. Well, I left didn't I? Had to get back `cause Naboo keeps locking the door at night. An' he knows I `ate sleeping on the step. The foxes keep trying to get off with me. Any way, Leroy went out and chased a taxi thinking it was he's bird." It seemed in that second he caught the lost in the middle of the story look Howard was throwing out to him like a lasso. "He was pissed." Vince shrugs. "Anyway he got `im self hurt didn't he?"
Vince shrugged out of his feather like cloak, like the prancing peacock he was. Settling a foot or so away from me. I scowled slightly as the boy nudged closer inch by inch. I fought the urge to shout my own little catch phrase at him. But the forlorn look of the boys anime eyes ceases such, it was a look so familiar to myself, a sadness they seemed too odd for Vince's sharp pointy features. It was like seeing the sunshine itself sulking in saddened saturation. I slipped my haunting muffin coated arm around Vince's skeletal frame, absently telling myself to feed the boy some proper Yorkshire grub tomorrow.
"'Oward?" Came a tentative childlike mummer from beside me, the sound of a worried child. In this moment I'd never seen Vince look so young.
"Yeah, little man." I replied softly to him as I wrapped an arm around his small frame.
"Is Leroy gonna be alright?"
This question stumped me. I felt frozen, much as I had back in the Artic. I felt my face carve slightly between my two cappuccino coloured eyebrows as I thought of an answer. How could I possibly know? The Vince had told basically nothing about what happened. But I couldn't bare to tell him that he was gonna be injured, bed bound, bruised and possibly disfigured like one of those rag dolls Vince seemed to have littered on top on his telly in the bedroom.
"Yeah. He'll be fine little man." I spoke pulling Vince tightly in to my lap. His pointy angles juxtaposing my softened ones almost poetically. If it were anyone else I might consider this romantic. Even if it were another time, but in this moment it only made me feel awful. I looked at the Joan Jett look alike once more he's bright sapphire lake eyes were shinier than even normal I could tell he was near to tears. I knew he didn't believe me, don't blame him really. I'm about as good at lying as Bob Fossil is at dancing. I fought the urge to shiver in disgust at the mental image that simile made.
"He'll be find Vince I promise." I spoke dropping a kiss on Vince's vampire toned skin, his alabaster tones than on anyone else would appear to make them seem sickly.

When I thought about this Wednesday compared to the others and I suddenly missed 'super fun friend night.'

Maybe normal Wednesdays weren't that bad after all.