TG has started pestering EB.

TG: dude john

EB: yeah dave?

TG: john my back hurts like a bitch

EB: haha that sucks!

EB: but seriously are you okay?

TG: yeah

TG: yeah i think ill be okay

TG: i just got to get used to these fuckers is all

EB: um, what are you talking about?

TG: im in the hospital for that fucking operation thing

EB: oh yeah that's right! You told me last week. How's the surgery going by the way? sorry i forgot

TG: not as bad as i thought

TG: this was my first day out of four though

TG: its probably going to get worse before it gets better

EB: gee, sorry to hear that man

EB: is there anything i can do to help?

TG: nah its not like you could do anything

TG: and-fuck

TG: fuck

TG: FUCK

EB: hey what's wrong? Is your backing hurting again? Get some pain killers or something

TG: nah its my hand

TG: they injected something into it

EB: What the hell did they put in your hand!? i'm not a scientist, but i dont think that's normal

TG: i

TG: i dont know

TG: but its making it hurt like hell

TG: and its getting all discolored and shit

EB: you have to know! What the fuck

TG: theyre not telling me shit

EB: What hospital are you at? i'll come right over!

TG: sorry dude they dont let visitors in

EB: i don't care, whatever they're doing it probably isn't legal

EB: or safe

TG: aah fuck

TG: dude

TG: its fucking turning black

EB: isn't there a phone nearby!? call someone, i don't know!

EB: Where are you?

TG: some hospital in houston

TG: bro wanted me to get this shit done for some reason

EB: That doesn't help me at all dude i'm all the way in Washington. there could be like 30 hospitals there

TG: really i have no idea how im going to sleep at night with these things on my back

EB: w-what things?

TG: well they uhh

TG: umm

EB: this is really creeping me out,

TG: they might have surgically attached two gigantic crow wings onto my back

EB: what the fuck, you're joking right?

TG: nope

TG: they have feathers and everything

EB: this can't seriously be happening

TG: yeah its sort of becoming a fad among parents

TG: damn though these things are really heavy and bulky

TG: yeah i think roses mom was thinking about doing it too

TG: rose told me that theyd "do it together"

EB: this is so fucked up

TG: hehe yeah

TG: fu

TG: fuck

EB: man what if my dad wants to do that

TG: i doubt it

TG: i dont think hed have the heart

EB: i hope so

EB: sometimes i wonder

TG: about what

EB: he's just so... weird

TG: yeah but i dont think hes into the whole turning my kid into his monster thi-holy jesus christ

EB: what!?

EB: is it still happening?

TG: yeah

TG: fuck its getting scalely now

EB: how much is this going to change you

TG: fuck i dont know

EB: there has to be an antidote lying around somewhere

TG: my neck and hips are getting really fucking itchy

EB: couldn't your bro just buy a fucking bird? man, adults are so fucking stupid

TG: hehe i know

TG: ive seen other dudes here getting the same thing done to them

EB: who even does this it makes no sense

TG: youd be surprised

TG: one dude looks like hes half crab

EB: that's a weird animal to turn into

TG: yeah and theres some chick that looks like a spider

EB: eww spiders are so gross!

TG: she definitely doesnt look like a prize ill say that much

TG: oh fucking god

EB: what now?

TG: its fucking stretching and the fingers are getting longer and holy shit it hurts

EB: that, i cannot even

TG: it feels like my hands in one of those medieval torture devices

TG: jesus fuck

EB: you gotta fight this or something!

TG: i would but im kind of in extreme agony right now

EB: well yeah you're pretty much becoming a bird or whatever

TG: so you can see why im not really in the mood for fighting

EB: but i don't want to lose you

TG: dude im not completely becoming a bird

EB: i guess, but what if this 'fixes' behavior? like, make you some obedient child

EB: i mean, parents are doing it

TG: i hope not

TG: that crab dude didnt seem to have much of a personality change

TG: maybe its kind of like why people raise show dogs

EB: that's terrible, to your own kid

TG: i think bro did it to be ironic

EB: thats even worse

TG: like he hates the fad but did it anyway for the sake of irony

EB: you're supposed to be there transforming for four days right?

TG: yeah but i think the last day is just a recovery day

EB: i see

EB: dammit, i feel so useless

TG: dont dude

EB: how the hell am i not supposed to?

G: if it makes you feel any better i think i have the hospitals name on this piece of paper they gave me now that i think about it

EB: that's great

TG: let me just reach over and

TG: okay its st francis hospital

TG: cant tell you exactly where its at in houston though

EB: i bet i could get my dad to fly us over

EB: and we could sneak you out

TG: what are you some kind of ninja dude

EB: yes i am one, duh

EB: have you noticed how heavy the security is there?

TG: i know its hard as fuck getting things inside the place

EB: hmm...

EB: what if

TG: what

EB: we went

EB: below

TG: what like digging my way out

EB: yup, my dad sells explosives

EB: he's really weird

TG: ...

EB: really weird...

TG: uhh how about i just pick these windows open and fly out

TG: it cause a lot less damage

TG: and bloodshed

EB: ...

EB: ...guess your plan is okay

TG: well it would

TG: this isnt like one of your shitty action movies

EB: they are not shitty! they're cool

TG: whatever dude

TG: how long will it take for you to get your ass here

EB: by plan it shoulde be in about 5 hours

EB: can you hold up till then

TG: i think theyre calling me in for one more quick eye exam before then

TG: but yeah i should be good

EB: perfect

TG: holy shit dude

TG: you know how i said my hips were getting itchy

EB: yeah

TG: there are these little black things growing out of them

EB: dude what

TG: yeah there coming out of my neck too

EB: now i wish i paid attention in biology class

TG: heh and you call yourself an ectobiologist

EB: there's a difference between biology and ectobiology smartass

TG: still has biology in it dipstick

EB: still don't see any ecto in it, fuckbreath

TG: shut it did you ask your dad yet

EB: Oh yeah, give me a sec

EB ceased pestering TG

Be John =

It's 4AM. You step away from your keyboard and stumble across the dark hallway of the house until reaching your Dad's room. If there's one rule in the Egbert house, it is to never, NEVER, enter Dad's room. Taking a breath to calm yourself, you knock on the door. "Dad?" You call out. No reply. This time, calling out louder, a light shines through the door. Not a moment later your Dad cracks open his door, leaving you squinting at the bright light suddenly showering over you. "Um, Dad. This is going to sound crazy, but we need to go to Houston!" You ask, still adjusting to the light, "I have to rescue a friend, I'm not entirely sure what's happening to him, but he needs me." You have a father-son stare off for about 2 minutes until he gives in with a shrug, retreating into his room to pack.

EB has started pestering TG

EB: yeah, he's packing now

TG: you should thank god hes a pushover

EB: could be all those stupid betty crocker sweets he's always eating

TG: theyve brainwashed him into becoming an obedient servant

EB: as long as he's not obeying the hospital staff we should be good

TG: damn those black things are getting bigger

EB: don't panic, it'll speed up the process

TG: well its kind of hard not to be freaked out by this shit

TG: that and my hand still hurts like a stubborn bitch

EB: tell me about it

EB: i'm surprised you can still type

TG: yeah im typing with my normal hand

TG: it hasnt spread to it yet

EB: lets keep it that way

EB: my dad has finished packing

TG: about damn time

EB: i'll message you when we arrive

TG: alright i think theyre calling me for that exam anyway

EB: good luck

TG: i appreciate your support dude

EB ceased pestering TG