Hello!

By Elizabeth L. Hoffman

'I'm such a failure. I failed everyone, I don't deserve to live.' Sango cried placing her face in her bent up knees. Her arms wrapped around her legs. 'I'm sorry Miroku.' Her shoulders began to shudder at every sob.

"Sango" Miroku called out as he walked towards her as she sobbed in the corner of Keade's hut. They all were recovering from another attack from Naraku. "Miroku I'm so sorry." She choked around a sob. "For what?" He asked as he sat down next to her. She looked up at him. Her cheeks stained with tears, eyes red and puffy; and yet she still took his breath away with her beauty. "If it weren't for me you wouldn't have sucked in the poisonous insects. I shouldn't have let Naraku get to me like that." She answered. "Sango it isn't your fault. I'm fine and I would have done it again in a heartbeat." He assured her.

He knew by the look in her eye there is no comforting today. She was punishing herself for what had happen to him even though he didn't suck in as many this time. He knew she was punishing herself for Kohaku as well. "If only I didn't suggest Kohaku to join us on that day, then none of this would be happening. He would never have been Naraku's slave like he is now. I would be happy with my father and brother. If only I haven't suggested." She said in between sobs as she put her face back down on her knees.

"Sango don't do this to yourself. None of this is your fault. It is all Naraku's. He is the one to blame not you." Miroku said as he put his arm around her shoulders to comfort her pulling her closer to him. She snapped her head up at him and shoved him away, and stood up and ran out of the hut.

"What happened?" InuYasha asked as Sango ran passed him. "She's blaming herself again." Miroku answered. "You going after her?" InuYasha asked as he sat down across from the monk. "No I'll give her time alone to think." He answered as he folded his arms across his chest.

Sango ran till she reached the river's edge. "I won't let him make me feel as if it isn't my fault when it is." She said to herself as she wiped her face. She sat on the bank binding her knees up to her chin and placed her face against them and cried. She cried till she couldn't cry anymore. After she calmed herself she looked up at the moon and stars. "Father, what should I do?" She asked. She turned to stare at the water. "Maybe a bath will clear my mind" She decided.

It was a warm summer night which made it perfect. She undressed and walked towards the water. She ducked her head under the water; she came back up when her lungs demanded air. Sango walked out of the water and sat on the bank where some small waves hit her. 'I wish it would just all end. I hate this. I just want to be free from this pain! I long for death.' Her disturbing thoughts came rushing back and she too sob again.

"I just want to die." She cried silently to herself. Something caught her eye. It was her dagger. She stared at it for a minute before she picked it up. She toyed with it in her hand. She straightened her left forearm out and pressed the dagger against her wrist. She cringed at the stinging pain as she ran the razor sharp blade across her wrist. Blood started pouring out. She switched hands and placed the blade at her right wrist.

Miroku followed after her after a few minutes went by. He followed her foot prints and found her sitting at the edge of the river. He ducked down when he noticed her sitting there naked. He heard her cry and sob for a few minutes. He watched in sadness as he heard her say "I just want to die." Her words hit his hearing. 'What is she saying? Why does she want to die?' He asked himself. Then his horror came to reality when he saw her pick up her dagger. 'No she wouldn't! She can't!' He told himself. He watched in horror as she sliced her left wrist. He jumped up and rushed over to her as he saw her switch the dagger into the other hand. Miroku wrapped his hand around her forearm to stop her action.

She felt a warm hand grab her left forearm before she ran the blade across, flinging the dagger out of her hand. She looked up with anger in her eyes. She glared at the violet blues that were wide with horror. "Sango! Why?" he spoke in a voice full of pain. "I long to die!" She screamed as she fought to free her left arm. "No I won't let you!" Miroku shouted back. "Let me go! I can't stand this anymore! I long to end my life!" She shrieked as she still fought to free herself. "Sango please stop!" He begged as he struggled to keep his grip around her arm. She stood up and tried again to free herself so she could run away from him.

She finally freed her arm but before she could run he grabbed a hold around her waist and held her as she struggled to free herself. "Please just let me die!" She cried as she went limp in his arms. They fell to the ground. "No I won't let you." He whispered in her ear. "Miroku please let me be free of this pain? I can't stand it anymore." She pleaded. "No!" He whispered again. "Please!" She pleaded around a sob. "No!" He answered. "Please." She cried. "No." he simply replied. She continued to plead while he denied her request.

Sango sobbed as Miroku held her. Her sobbing turned into crying and finally subsided after an hour. She wiped her face against his robes. After she was calmed he wrapped her wrist up with a cloth that she was going to use to wash her body with, so to bandage her wrist up. "I can't win. Either we defeat Naraku and get Kohaku back we need to destroy the jewel and it will kill him or Naraku takes the shard out. Either way he dies. Why fight when there's no saving him." She choked around a sob. "I have nothing to live for." She added. Miroku looked at her with hurt in his eyes.

"Sango, you do have a future to look forward to." He said trying to hide the hurt in his voice. "Like what? I have no future." She asked. "Sango don't you know...that I love you?" He admitted. She stared back at him in disbelief. "No you don't." She glared at him. "Sango!" He gasped. He noticed the hurt and hopelessness in her eyes. "How can any man want me? I'm scarred and nowhere near a lady. No man wants a scarred woman. No man wants me." She spat out with disgust.

"Sango, can't you see how beautiful you are?" He asked. "Everything about you is desirable. From your curves to your amazingly strong heart." He answered as he traced his cursed hand along her curves of her naked body. He placed his uncursed hand on the side of her face. "Haven't you noticed how men look at you when you pass through a village?" He answered searching her brown eyes. "The-they do?" She stuttered. Her eyes grew wide. "Yes they do. Your beauty attracts a lot of attention. It's not just your skills, you move with such grace. It drives many men to drool over." Miroku answered. "But my scar..." She started to doubt him. "It's nothing. Actually it reminds me of a star." He smiled as he ran his hand along her back. She turned away from his gaze in despair and embarrassment.

"I want to believe you, but you say that to a lot of women." She confessed. "No I don't. I swear you are not like any other woman I have met. You are very special to me. When I look at you I can see my future when before I could not see it till I met you." Miroku confessed. "Then why haven't you asked me to bare you children?" She asked. "Because I don't want you to bare me children..." He started. "But you said you loved me?" She interrupted. "Yes I do love you! That is why I would never burden you with that. There is more to the curse then just the wind tunnel." He finished his statement.

Sango looked confused. He looked back at her then turned his gaze out towards the river. "My mother died giving birth to me as did my father's mother. The curse claimed the death of the woman he loved as well as my mother who my father loved. If I impregnated you now and I lose you do to childbirth I couldn't live with myself. I will never be able to forgive myself." He explained. "I love you and seeing you trying to end your life is ripping my heart apart. I'd rather the wind tunnel suck me in before I see you die." He said staring out into the water. He looked down at her brown eyes which were full of sorrow. "I know it hurts and I understand you feel hopeless, but there is hope. We will find away to save your brother." He said with hope in his voice. "I'm so sorry Miroku." She cried as she wrapped her arms around his neck and rested her head under his chin. He rested his chin on the top of her dark brown hair.

He pulled away a bit and lifted her chin up with his knuckle tilting her face up towards his. Miroku leaned down to caress his lips with hers. Sango opened her mouth in surprise but allowed it. Miroku slid his tongue through his lips and ran it along Sango's bottom lip, demanding entrance which she gladly welcomed. Finally they broke for air. Miroku laid Sango down on the grass as he hovered over top of her studying her naked chest. Her breast so lusciously round. Her perked nipples erected in excitement since the air was to warm. His eyes traveled down her toned body till he hit wear his robes hid the rest of her body from his sight. "Kami, you're so beautiful." He said. His voice laced with desire. Sango blushed a deep red as she heard his words. He looked up at her blushing cheeks and kissed her again. She took advantage of his moment of distraction, and pulled his robes open and off his shoulders. He realized what she was doing he sat up and pulled them the rest of the way down to unveil his bare chest and abdomen.

Sango ran her hands along his chest. He was muscular and well built. She placed her hands on his thick shoulders as she marveled at his muscled form. His robes fell down to rest at his hips. Her hand traveled down his toned abdomen and she found a small trail of hair that trailed downwards, disappearing in his robes. She lightly traveled her fingers along the trail. She circled back up to his neck. "You're beautiful." She breathed out in amazement. Miroku laughed lightly. "Sango you're much more beautiful than I." He whispered. He leaned down and began to kiss her neck and let his lips wander down to the valley between her perfect mounds. Miroku planted kisses up and down one breast till he reached the peak. He wrapped his lips around her perked nipple and swirled his tongue around the harden bud. Sango arched her back in deep pleasure.

She began to feel a wetness coming from her neither regions as he continued to ravish her breast. He moved over to the twin and performed the same action. She felt his left hand run down her curves and putting his hand at the small of her back, rolling them over to where Sango was on top of him. He released her nipple; he placed his cursed hand on the side of her face to pull her down to him for another passionate kiss. His left hand traveled down till he found his favorite spot. Miroku lightly squeezed the flesh of her rear end. Sango moaned in his mouth as his hand grew dangerously closely towards her core. He smiled against her lips. He rolled them over again till he was hovering over her again. He released her lips. He watched her as he cupped his hand between her legs and his middle finger pressed further into her folds. She was so wet and hot. "Sango you're so wet." He said heavy with desire.

She arched her hips up against his hand causing his finger to go further into her wet warmth in response. He groaned as he felt her walls wrap around his finger. He glided his finger up and down adding another digit to the first finger, which caused Sango to moan. His middle finger penetrated her core which caused a deep long moan from the woman in his arms. He thrusted in and out of her sleek core. He added another. His thumb circled the little bundle of nerves that rested at the top just under the hood of her folds. Sango thrashed around in deep pleasure. She felt as if she would faint from the deep pleasure he was causing her. She arched her back up when her release came rushing out onto his fingers. He continued pumping his fingers till her juices stopped. He pulled out his hand and watched her calm down.

She calmed her breathing and opened her eyes to find him next to her with his head propped up on his left hand as he watched her. He brushed her hair off her cheek "You are so beautiful" He said with a smile. "Miroku, that was...was amazing." She said in between breaths. Miroku moved over top of her. He placed his right hand on her cheek to gain her attention. "You ever attempt this again I will keep you locked up while we go off to fight Naraku. I will not lose you. I will not allow you to die, either by his or your own hand. I love you and I will never let you go. Got that?" He said with a sharp and demanding voice. "Yes I promise to live for you. I promise to never harm myself again as long as you love me I will live for you." She answered.

"Thank you." He whispered. Miroku sat up straight and pulled his robes back on. He stood up to get her kimono and hand it back to her. Sango dressed and watched as he debated on rather to hand her the dagger she used trying to kill herself. "Miroku you can trust me. I won't attempt this ever again you have my word." She said as she tried to grab the dagger. He stared at the dagger that still had blood on it and he looked at her bandaged wrist. "I'll hold on to this till I am sure you won't try his again." He answered with a worried face. He didn't trust her quite yet. Sango sighed and let him have his way. They walked back to Keade's hut in silence while holding hands.