Gus gave his friend a hard look as the groom sauntered up with his tux hung over his shoulder like it was some letterman jacket and not the thing he was going to be getting married in a few hours.
"Shawn, where were you? We have to finish getting things set up for the wedding. And you put that jacket on! If you lose it, Juliet will kill us both." Gus put his hands on his hips.
"Don't be a corndog that was left in the sun for three days, Gus, everything is fine. Besides, all my groomsmen aren't here yet." Shawn said with his Shawn smile.
"I still don't know how you got Lassiter to be a groomsmen."
"Well if he was Jules bridesmaid it'd be weird. The dresses are peach and it is so not his color!"
"Our ties are peach." Gus pointed out, snatching the jacket gruffly. "Don't wrinkle it!"
"You're more stressed about this shindig then Jules." Shawn teased, falling into the chair with a grin.
"I am, and you should be to, Shawn!" Gus glared, placing the jacket on the chairs back. "Today is imporjulie"
"Hey, Lassieface!" Shawn grinned as the current chief of police walked up to into the space. Lassiter glared down at him, tie hanging, undone, from his neck.
"Spencer." He greeted, looking uncomfortable in the tailored suit. Lassiter pulled at the jacket, then cleared his throat. "O'Hara wants me to tell you to stop trying to peek in on her getting dressed."
"Then tell her that if she doesn't want me to peek at her she should stop being so sexy." Shawn joked, getting up from his chair. "Come on, Lassie, hang out with us. You're MY groomsman after all."
"Shut up, Spencer, I'm not here for you, I'm here for O'Hara." Lassiter glared, fixing his own collar.
"Lassie, your at my wedding, can't you call me Shawn?"
"I'd rather skinny dip in jellyfish infested waters." Shawn pouted, making sure to teary eye at the older man.
"You're my friend too." He whined in his most heartbroken voice.
"That's questionable." Carlton crossed his arms before raising a brow. "Are you going to cry? You've always know I didn't like you."
"He's very sensitive, Lassiter." Gus said. "Especially now, he's getting married today, do you know how big a deal that is for him?" Gus placed a hand on Shawn's back, playing into Shawn's behavior. Lassiter sighed deeply, visibly counting backwards from ten.
"At most we're... What do the kids call it?-Frenemies." Shawn's face lit up faster than a Christmas tree. "Barely that, Spencer!"
"I love you to, man." Shawn swooped Lassie into a bone crushing hug. "I knew you'd warm up eventually!"
"Let go with me or I'll charge you with assault!" Lassiter hollered, but Shawn ignored him until the taller men gently patted His back.
"I told you you'd feel better if you said it." Shawn smiled as he let go.
"I don't, I'm going back to O'Hara."
"Awh, come on, Lassie, stay with us and help us with the chairs." Shawn smiled, plopping himself back down on one.
"Tell me again why you couldn't just rent a place?" Lassiter complained.
"Jules and I like the outside. We had our first kiss outside. We did rent a place for the reception, though, do I get points for that?"
"No, I'm leaving, O'Hara needs me. Get the chair set up yourself." He turned around and stalked off.
"He loves us."
"You know that's right." The best friends high fived.
###############
"O'Hara?" Carlton peeked into her dressing room.
"Carlton, can you help me with this zipper, Karen is off getting her dress on?" Juliet asked, turning and giving him a semi pleading look. Carlton gave her a flat look, but she gave him a baby blue puppy dog eyed stare-Shawn helped her perfect it-and he soon caved.
"How're the boys?" She asked, tilting her head at him in the mirror.
"They are fine, Shawn is screwing around, but they are fine." He said as he zipped up the dress. "And you... Look beautiful." Juliet giggled, turning to give him a little spin.
"You think?"
"Yes, I do, Spencer is a very lucky guy." He smiled at her in her heartline neckline dress in all it's sparkly awesomeness.
"Thanks." She spun it slightly before frowning at her ex-partner. "Carlton, this is me and Shawn's wedding, can't you play nice and call him Shawn?" Carlton gave her the kind of mindless look someone who just woke up from a coma might sport.
"I don't know if I can..." He said slowly, the idea nearly beyond him.
"Please try, for my sake. Shawn was over the moon when you agreed to be a groomsman." Juliet said, giving him a hug. "Now, I need you to get Karen so we can do hair and makeup." Carlton nodded, jogging out to find Karen trying to sneak a snack.
"Karen?"
"Carlton!"
"It's good to see you to, Karen." Lassie chuckled. "O'Hara needs you, and seriously, cookies?" Karen blushed, stammering until she straightened her back and took on her old chief persona.
"You will not mention this to anyone." She commanded, arms crossed with cookies in hand.
"It can be a secret, one chief to another." Carlton chuckled, shaking head. "But only if you give me one. All this wedding stuff is stressful."
"No kidding." Karen laughed. "Mine was horrible. One brides maid had gotten pregnant and didn't tell me."
"Mine was interrupted by a shoot out." Lassiter said, taking a cookie and biting into it. "I win." Karen tipped her head in agreement.
"Always the competitive one." She smiled, "Did you need something?"
"Yeah, O'hara needs you, but first, I want to check a few thing with you first to make sure this goes off with out a hitch." He said and she nodded. "Now, are all the case either of them working closed? Are their any drug lords or serial killers active in the area? And are we sure Spencer isn't going to run?"
"Cases are closed, all drug lords are either keeping to themselves or guests, no serial killers..." She checked off slowly. "And I think Spencer is too infatuated with O'Hara to run."
"And we are sure about that last one?"
"Carlton, have a little faith, Shawn has really grown up." Karen said, throwing a wrapper away.
"When I went and talked to him, I'm pretty sure he had a corndog in his pocket."
"Well, that's part of the reason she loves him." Karen pointed out. "Smile Carlton, your best friends marrying the man she loves. And tie your tie!" With that she swept out of his sight to help the bride.
"Maybe I don't want to tie it yet!" He hollered, following her in the room.
"Carlton, why don't you go help Shawn?" Jules smiled at her friend. "I'm sure you don't want to be here for this."
"I'm good here. My Moms partner has taught me a lot about hair, I could help." Both women stared at him a moment.
"Carlton," the old, spine chilling chief voice sprang up again. "Go help Shawn."
"Why? He's a big boy, he can handle himself!" He said before looking down to the side. "Well, maybe not. But Guster is, they will be fine. Do you want a bun, or braids, I can do either."
"Carlton," Juliet gathered her dress in her hands to waddle towards him. "I'm worried those two will break or burn something."
"Gus is an adult." Lassiter said. "I'm sure they'll be fine."
"Carlton... Please?" Juliet said, breaking out the puppy eyes again. "It'd be a big help to me and it would make Shawn so happy. Pleeaasseeee?"
"I dont-" she blinked a few times to make her eyes glisten, employing the wobbling lip. "Fine fine! I'll do it!"
"Thank you." She gave him hug. "Go make nice with Shawn, he's a lot more mature than you think."
"Corndog in the pocket. That's all I'm saying."
##########################
"Hey, look who is back already!" Shawn grinned, biting into a corndog as he stood up.
"I knew it!" Carlton sighed, inching into the room. "You two numbskulls broke a vase."
"Jules shouldn't have us to decorate the reception hall." Shawn shrugged a shoulder.
"It wasn't my fault. I turned for two seconds and he had broken it." Gus crossed his arms.
"You're more of a child then most children." Carlton grumbled.
"It was an accident, Lassie, cut me a break." Shawn spread a hand across his chest. "I'm under a lot of pressure right now, I'm getting married."
"You won't be if you break all her vases." Carlton walked to a closet, pulling out a box. "You're lucky we planned for this." He lifted an identical vase out.
"Awesome." Shawn grinned.
"Don't break this one." He huffed, placing it in the proper place.
"I won't..." Shawn said before looking serious for a second. "Hey, uh, Lassie, you've gotten married before, twice, so, uh, do you got any, like, tips or something?"
"Don't throw up." Lassiter said sarcastically, before turning to see Shawn's serious face. "Oh...uh... She's gonna look good-great actually...So don't fall over."
"That's it? Don't fall over?" Gus said, blinking. "That's all you have to say? Shawn reaches out from his usual dumbassery and that's it? Look Shawn, I can give some real advice, you-"
"No, Gus, I don't want yours!" Shawn swatted Gus away. "You've only gotten married once and it was a drunken mistake with a crazy stalker girl. You don't know anything about marriage, he does, and he knows more about Jules than any of us." Shawn looked back to Lassiter. "Lassie- Carlton, do you have anything else?"
"Uh, Guster can you leave us alone a minute?"
"Fine!" Gus mutters, stomping out. "But I'm still the best man."
"So, uh, you're being really serious right now, huh?" Lassie said, sitting down. Shawn down by him.
"Yeah, I mean Jules is wonderful and I..." Shawn looked to the side. "I dunno. I don't want to screw this up, we both know I have fudged up plenty of other things, but I don't this to be one."
"Getting married..." Carlton splayed his hands out. "It's wonderful...but I mean, you might get scared, it's scary."
"You're aren't making me feel any better."
"Okay, look, Spe- ... Shawn, you are going to do fine. You love Juliet, and she loves you, and that is all that matters." He clamped a hand down on his shoulder. "Everything will be fine, just be yourself... And may I just ask, which of these is the real you? This guy who is serious, collected and intelligent, or the guy who mocks and twitches and acts like a child?"
"Both are."
"That's very strange." Carlton commented. "OHara might actually be somewhat content with you."
"That's good to hear." Shawn laughed, looking to the ground.
"And Shawn, can I ask you something? Outside the realm of lady justice, of course because then I'd have to arrest you..."
"Just ask."
"On the goodbye video, you were going to tell me you weren't psychic... So how did solve all those crimes?" Carlton asked, leaning forward slightly. Shawn turned away, clearing his throat.
"Uhm...You know Sherlock Holmes?" Carlton nodded. "You know how he sees things normal people miss?"
"That's it?"
"Pretty much." Shawn shrugged. "Look, I can tell you more, but you can't tell Jules, she like to be the smart one..." Carlton nodded again. "I have an eidetic memory and IQ of 187. My dad trained me since birth to be a detective, which is why I don't do it, well it's one reason. He trained me to be hyperobservant, which is why I notice all that stuff."
"Woah..." Carlton sat back heavily in the chair, looking as if his entire world had just been turned inside out then kicked into another universe. "187?...Holy Lady Justice."
"Yeah, that's why I don't tell people." Shawn grumbled, twiddling his thumbs. "It's a lot easier to be a numbskull than a genius, so I just kinda... Let it go, had fun, y'know? It's more fun this way."
"Why didn't you just say so before? Why pretend to be a psychic?"
"Would you have believed me if I had told you?" Shawn gave him a flat look. Cartoon gave a sharp and dark chuckle.
"Good point," The older man studied Shawn. "Wow, you're Shawn... my entire world just got smashed into little pieces."
"Yeah, yet another reason I don't tell people." Shawn smiled. "Of course Dad knows, which is why he is so tough on me, because I'm 'wasting my life.' But I think he's just too controlling, it's my life, y'know? And Gus knows, but he pretends he doesn't... He is a good friend like that."
"So...how do you guys figure out... I mean all of it can't be deduced."
"You promise this is off the book." Carlton nodded. "Way off, like if you typed book into Google maps you'd need a kayak to get there."
"Yes!"
"Entering with implied...consent?"
"So, breaking and entering?"
"Yeah, pretty much. Or conning my way into the place and then looking through their stuff." Shawn shrugged. "I don't steal, at least, well not normally. I just gather the info I need to support whatever I have deduced and bam, there you go. Sometimes just interviewing is helpful as well." Shawn twiddled his thumbs.
"Really?" Carlton let out a whistle. "That's more impressive than any psychic crap."
"Well you sorta put me in a corner, man, if I didn't come up with a reason why I could figure that guy you were going to lock me the big house." Shawn flailed slightly. "Besides, I think it's sorta fun, I can literal act however I want when I pretend to have a vision. Tell me haven't wanted to do any of that stuff in the office, ever? It's fun."
"There's no other answer I'd expect from you Spencer."
"Well, I hope that helps you understand, and thanks for the advice, it helps a lot." Shawn stood up. "Hey Gus, come on back! It's time to make the music mix for the party! Wanna help, Lassie?" Shawn gave him a classic Shawn grin.
"Music?" Lassiter sighed, which he seemed to be doing a lot of. "Oh good lord..."
"It'll be fun! Come on." Shawn continued to grin as Gus reentered the room.
"You can help make sure Shawn doesn't over load the playlist with 80's music." Gus said as he walked up to the homemade DJ stand.
"What's yours and O'Haras song?" Carlton asked, inspecting the stand speculatively.
"That our little secret." Shawn stuck out his tongue.
"He won't tell me either." Gus sighed.
"Oh, oh, we should play this one!" Shawn grinned, starting to play a song over the speakers before starting to sing along in the microphone. "Like a virgin... Touched for the first time... Like a viiirrgggiinnnn!" Gus shrieked-in a manly tone-and turned it off.
"Shawn! That is inappropriate."
"Oh, and Billy Jean is?" Shawn asked before singing into the micro phone. "Billy Jeans not my lover... She's just a girl, who claims that I am the ONEEEEE! But that kid is not my son!"
"Yes but...it's different!" Gus argues, stomping a foot.
"How? One is about a man making a woman feel like she's having sex for the first time again and one is about getting a strange woman pregnant!" Shawn crossed his arms.
"Its...you...shut up Shawn." Gus huffs.
"He's got a point, Guster, all music is inappropriate, so we might as well get over it. Maybe we could play something from this century?" Carlton said, walking up to them. Shawn gave a mile wide grin.
"I know just the thing." Shawn said, tapping away at his phone.
"Shawn, don't you dare play what I think you are!" Gus glared and soon 'It's getting hot in here started playing over the speakers and Shawn started to sing along. Gus shouted something Lassiter couldn't quite hear, and so the chief decided to ignore it.
"O'Hara has a song she enjoys a great deal!" He shouted, only gaining confused stares. He grunted then taking the phone from Shawn he quickly let 'Uptown Funk' fill the air.
"Oh yeah! This is the song she's been singing in the shower!" Shawn smiled, starting to dance a little. "I like it because it reminds me of 80's music." Lassiter nodded, watching as the two younger men begin to dance-the more accurate term would be gracelessly flail. He was tapping along, mumbling the words to himself.
"Alright, time to stop." Gus said, stopping the music. "That's one song down, now we just need about one hundred more."
"Why don't you have a real DJ?" Lassiter commented.
"Because it's cheaper to do it myself." Shawn shrugged a shoulder. "I'm shelling out all that doe for something I can do myself."
"He's got a point, Lassiter."
"Okay, let's just put together a random mix of 80's music mixed in with some 21st century stuff. Along with all the dancing classics like the electric slide, the Cupid Shuffle, things like that." Shawn tapped away at his phone.
"Shawn, if Like a Virgin plays at any point tonight, I don't care what you're going, I'll tackle you." Gus glared.
"Fine, I'll put it at the end."
"Shawn!" Gus growled.
"Add 'Its your love' by Tim Mcgraw." Lassiter crossed his arms. "O'Hara likes sappy country."
"Yeah, she does..." Shawn smiled. "She's says it's different then other country because it's the only country that's not about getting drunk or getting revenge on you exs. On it goes!"
"Or death. Lots of country is about death." Gus felt the need to add, earning a confused stare from Shawn and a loud sigh from Lassie.
"Shania Twain. I spent an entire stake out listening to that woman." Lassiter shuddered. "She adores her."
"How can she not? Man I feel Like a Woman? You go, girlfriend." Shawn snapped his fingers, placing a hand on his hip.
"Just put some of them on Spencer." Carlton pinched his nose. "It'll make her squeak."
"Oh you mean that cute clap-jump-scream-squeaky thing she does?" Shawn grinned dreamily. "Hell yeah Shania's going on!"
"Good." Carlton shook his head.
"There we go... Easy." Shawn smiled. "Now we need to finish getting ready, people are going to show up soon. If my Dad gets here and I'm not completely ready, I'm toast."
"Buttered toast." Gus agreed, pushing shawn into the dressing room. "Come on Lassiter!"
"Why?"
"Because I need as much help as I can get to get this," Gus tapped Shawn's head. "Wedding ready. Now come on. We need to be outside greeting the attendants within the hour."
"He's not even in his suit!" Lassiter squawked.
"Yeah, but I have it in my dressing room." Shawn said, dragging out the last word slightly.
"Because I remembered to put it in there when we came in!" Gus reminded.
"Well alright." Lassie blinked.
"And tie your tie, Lassie, you look like a drunk with your slung around your neck like that." Lassiter made a very-Carlton sounding noise of offense and tie the tie before following after them.
###################
"Hey there, Poppa!" Shawn walked up to his father, looking all dapper and put together. Henry let out a loud whistle, nodding in approval.
"You actually look like an adult, Shawn." He said before looking to Gus. "Thank you, Gus."
"It wasn't easy. He almost bit us when we tried to comb his hair."
"My hair is my crowning glory!" Shawn whined, losing what was left of the false image of sophistication. "You can't just drag a toothed monster through it and expect that to be okay!"
"Good to see you, Shawn." Henry sighed, giving his son a pat on the back. "You ready for this?"
"Yes, of course." Shawn said proudly.
"Good." Henry smiled. "Now, where is my seat?"
"Over here, Mr. Spencer." Lassie gestured to the chair.
"I can't believe you agreed to be a groomsman." Henry said as he walked over.
"Neither can we, we're still waiting for him to bail." Gus said.
"I'm doing it for O'Hara." Lassiter grumbled.
"You're a good partner, Lassiter, loyal even when you aren't working together anymore." Henry patted Lassie on the shoulder. Lassiter grunted his consent and moved to greet other guests.
#######################
"Okay, it's show time." Shawn gulped, straitening his tie as walked up to the front to wait for the ceremony to start. "Let's do this." With one last breath he nodded at the drug lord turned playlist manager for the night and the music started.
First came the bridesmaid, a woman that Jules had gotten close to at work, and the maid of honor, Karen. They were in peach dresses that went just past their knees and had a V-neckline. Following them was first Lassiter, who looked near regal and pretty damn proud, and then Gus...who was nearing tears. Shawn sighed as his best man took his place by his side before leaning over to whisper to him.
"Man, don't cry." He whispered. Gus' lip wobbled dangerously.
"I'm so happy," He breathed, as the crowd rose. "You do so much good all the time for all these people and you try your best to make the world better and now you're getting married to the love of your life and its... So great."
"Deep breaths, buddy." Shawn whispered before straightening himself out as the music kicked up and Juliet stepped into the aisle.
Suddenly the world stopped, which Shawn was fairly certain couldn't happen, but then again he felt frozen and off balance. He had to relearn to breath in that moment, and then she met his eyes and the entirety of his knowledge was gone. His heart pounded in his chest so hard he could feel it in his ears and his breath started to pick up speed as she got closer to the front. Then he felt wetness well up on his face and he reached up and wiped it away before looking at it. Tears.
"Hey." Juliet whispered when she met him at the front, grin sparkling like the stars. Her eyes were so blue Shawn thought the sky might be gray now, and her hair looked like gold got misplaced there.
He might be the luckiest man to ever dance on this earth.
"Shawn." Juliet whispered, snapping him from his flurry. "Stop crying so we can get married." She said with happy tears in her own eyes, making them sparkle further.
"Yeah, Spencer, man up." Lassiter said, though he was clearly whipping away his own tears. Shawn cleared his throat.
"I don't know what you're talking about." He nodded, huffing slightly. "Let's do this."
"Alright." The minister said, smiling as Shawn stepped closer to Jules. "We are here today to join these two souls together in holy matrimony. Now, I believe the couple wishes to have Mr. Lassiter do a reading at this time." He looked over to Carlton, who nodded and took out a piece of paper.
"Right yeah okay," carlton nodded. "So this isn't practical, but you two met in a coffee shop while she was undercover and he was a psychic so nothing's practical with you. Anyways, I've known you both for about the same amount time-Spencer longer, but I spend more time with O'Hara- and I like to think I know you fairly well. I didn't think you were a good couple, it didn't make much sense."
The entire hall gave a collected disgusted snort, Karen facepalmed and O'Hara smiled fondly at her best friend.
"I mean shes practical, obviously intelligent, well rounded, and one of the best people I've ever met. I mean he's a child to his core, unconventional, unreliable, and extraordinarily...strange." He took a deep breath, ignoring the deathly glares he was receiving.
"What I mean is that I never expected one of the most important people in my life to fall in love with an unfortunate acquaintance I've spent most of time with for years." Another sigh, someone might've growled. "But I'm happy they did, because never have I met two people who differ so much they become better together."
"Awh, Lassieface." Shawn chirped.
"Anyway, I think this verse best exemplifies that." He cleared his throat before reading out an old poem that he had certainly found on the internet. When was done Juliet leaned over and gave him a hug.
"Awh, thank you, Carlton!" He mumbled something, patting her back awkwardly.
"Alright, let's continue." The minister said as they separated and Lassie returned to his spot. "And now, the vows. I believe they have written their own votes? Shawn, you can start." Shawn smiled, nodding.
"I...well first of all holy cow Jules," he motioned to her. "You look like you popped out of a wedding magazine."
There was a collective 'awe' from the crowd.
"I...well as Lassie put it we're an odd couple, I mean I asked you out next to a dead body that one time..." He was rambling, but not his usual rambling the nervous kind that made his skin itch. "Either way, I know we've never been normal, but I'm really happy that we aren't because then I'd get bored and I'd never-ever, ever, ever- want to get bored of you, because w-well..."
With a deep breath he gave her a crooked little smile.
"I've been with a lot of attractive, interesting, and intelligent women." Juliet was beginning to glare. "I mean Sasha was-" Gus elbowed him. "What I mean Jules-Juliet...Juliet, is that out of all those women you are the most gorgeous, mind-melting, confusing, brilliant, and wonderful I ever had the pleasure of meeting."
The awes got loud and he heard a sniffle, it might have been him.
"And, if I believed in fate or soul mates then I'd believe you were mine." He gave her a bright smile. "And I want to stay with you until you start dying your hair blonde and cursing yappy dogs, if you'll take me. Maybe even longer, but we get to that point I doubt you'll want to be with me anymore because I'll be that." He pointed to his father.
"Shawn!" Henry glared. Shawn grinned, and Juliet returned it.
"Now Juliet." The priest nodded. "Your vows."
"Shawn," she began, with a lovesick smile. "My Shawn, I must say...You're the most foolish genius I've ever met, and its amazing. Every moment I spend with you is amazing, absolutely fantastic. Even when you marathon Phineas and Ferb at 4 am."
A collective laugh, the crowd was very responsive today.
"I've always thought you were handsome, gorgeous-in a manly way of course." She added, looking at his confused face. "But the way you make me laugh, make everyone laugh and always put happiness before almost everything is the reason I became so infatuated with you."
More awes were heard from the crowd.
"I promise... To try to laugh at all your jokes, even the really bad ones, Gus can tell you how bad they are, that's what we have him for. And I also promise to stay by your side, forever, if you will take me." She smiled.
"Hot dog, I will. Hey, can I kiss her yet?" Shawn grinned at the minister.
"No, but soon. You two done? Okay, now will someone give me the rings?" He said and Gus handed them over. "Alright, Shawn Spencer, do you take Juliet as you lawfully wedded wife?"
"I..." Shawn swallowed the lump in his throat. "I do!" His ring was slipped into his finger.
"And do you Juliet, take Shawn as you husband?"
"I do." She smiled as the ring was slipped into her finger.
"You may kiss the bride." Shawn let a whoop before pulling her close in an excited kiss.
"Alright, to the reception hall!" Shawn hollered when they separated before picking Juliet up bridal style and carrying her down the aisle.
"Shawn!" Juliet laughed as he carried her off.
##################
"Alright, time to get started on this reception, but first we need the have the speeches so we can go a head and eat!" Shawn grinned. "So who wants to start... Gus?" He grinned at his friend, who had just sat down with his chicken dish. Gus blinked owlishly up at him.
"Karen can start." Gus blurted.
"No, no you start, your the best man." He shoved the microphone into his hand before sitting down and looking at Gus with hopeful eyes.
"Right, well, I've known Shawn a long time, and to be completely honest I always thought he would never get married. Never thought it for a minute. Not when he got me in trouble at the Mexican border, not when he signed a lease in my name to start a psychic detective business, and certainly not when I heard him screaming about commitments." Gus said. "And I don't understand why, but Juliet managed to get to him. He has wanted to marry this girl for years now, and that is saying something when your talkin about Shawn."
Juliet grinned triumphantly at Shawn, who was flushing.
"And out of the girls you've been with boy am I glad it was her." He nodded. "And I must say, Shules is one of my favorite relationships in the world and I'm so happy you two finally sucked it up and got together."
"Beautifully said, now gimme that!" Shawn took back the microphone. "Anyone else, no? Let's than!" Shawn said quickly. Too many people here knew embarrassing things about him for speeches.
"Actually," karen stood, snatching the microphone. "I do."
"Really?" Shawn pouted. "Are you sure? Wouldn't you rather eat some jerk chicken?"
"I'm the maid of honor Spencer."
"Are you really...?" Shawn placed a finger to his head and waved his fingers around.
"Babe, stop." Juliet pulled Shawn down. "Just let her talk. I'm sure it'll be fine."
"Okay..." Shawn said, sitting his head on her shoulder. Karen smiled into the microphone.
"Shawn and juliet were always meant to be together, I knew from the beginning." Karen said. "There was always something when they worked together, something amazing. They were working together like a couple before they ever got together, and it never made it hard for them to get work done, though it did cause problems with Lassiter." The man huffed at that. "They are good partners in work and in life and I wish them luck."
Juliet hugged Shawn's arm and smiled at her friend.
"Thank you..." She cooed.
"No problem." Karen smiled before having the microphone snatched back.
"Alright, let's kick up up the music and get this reception STARTTTEEDDDDDD!" Shawn grinned into the microphone. The drug lord grinned pushing play on the list and an 80's song played over the speakers.
"Shawn, sit down." Jules smiled and he complied. "This fish is really good, Shawn. The pineapple sauce was a good choice. Wanna try some?"
"Only if you try some if this jerk chicken." Shawn picked up a forkful of chicken and she picked up some fish and they fed each other bites. Gus squeaked, taking Lassies hand and flailing . the two men then stared at each other.
"I like whiskey." Gus said in a deep voice. "And sports...and ties."
"Me to." Lassie said before quickly sucking back his champagne. "I need more of this."
"Okay..." Gus said as he messed with his tie.
"I'm going to the bar." Lassie got up and walked away.
"We broke Lassie already." Shawn snickered before yelling after Lassiter. "Don't get too wasted, buddy!" Lassiter made a vague, and probably offensive motion and sat by the bar.
"Leave him alone, Shawn." Jules said but she was giggling.
"Never!" Shawn cackled in a joking evil scientist way and she kissed him.
######################
"Alright, everybody! Get off the dance floor!" Gus said into the microphone in his deep announcer/radio host voice. "It is time for the couples first dance." Shawn danced into the center, Juliet's hand in his. He pulled her close, and grinned as the music started. Gus blinked as 'Like a Virgin' played over the speakers. "Shawn, you son-of-a-bitch!"
Shawn stuck his tongue out at him and Juliet giggled as Shawn hugged her closer and they started to rock back and forth.
"You're scandalizing people." juliet scolded.
"Come on, you love this song." Shawn smiled, nuzzling her with his nose. "Everyone does. Nobody actually listens to the lyrics of songs and look." He flicked his eyes to the side to another two or three couple who had started to dance. "They love it." She sighed, lying her head on his shoulder.
"I love you." She said softly.
"Love you to." He snuggled into her hair before whispering in her ear. "Yeah, you makkkeeee me feel, shiny and neewwww."
"Stop." She laughed into his shoulder.
Meanwhile at the bar...
Lassiter sucked back the last of his whiskey before looking out at the happy couple dancing. He sighed and looked and to the counter. He wished his sweet Marlowe and Lily were here, but Marlowe wasn't allowed leave Santa Barbara. Suddenly, he saw someone familiar in the corner of his eye. He jumped up, trying to make sure no one saw them.
"You can't be here!" He hissed.
"Honeysuckle, it's okay, I talked to my parole officer." Marlowe smiled. "She let me off the hook for tonight, I mean I still can't drink but it seems you have already done my drinking for me." He huffed, breath sick with whiskey.
"I was bored." He defended petulantly.
"Sure, sweetie knuckle." She gave him a kiss. "Baby wants to dance." She looked down to little Lilly, who had started to do a little ditty when the song switched over to a more upbeat and quick tune. Well, it was the best an almost two yearold could do, she was pretty much just bouncing on her feet and clapping her hands. Lassiter smiled, picking her up with a sigh and swaying towards the floor.
"That's my man." Marlowe giggled, following him close behind.
"Hey, Marlowe, I see that request went through!" Juliet smiled at the woman. Jules was currently dancing with Shawn, or at least she was dancing and he was being a dorky fool.
"It's Marlowe and Lillypad!" Shawn grinned at the little family unit. The two smiled and waved at him.
"Congrats you two puppies!" Marlowe smiled.
"I'm glad you could make it. I hope my recommendation was helpful." Juliet smiled.
"Oh, it was. I'm just glad I got to come. Sorry I missed the ceremony, but I'm here now and my and little little angel are ready to party." She tickled Lilly under her little chin. Lilly flail-hopped in her dads arm, giggling and dancing.
"She's a happy little bundle." Shawn chuckled. "We are sure she's Lassie's?" Lassiter glowered at the younger man.
"Yes."
"Really? Huh." Shawn grinned cheekily.
"Shut up!"
"Honeysuckle, calm down." Marlowe purred, stroking his hair. "down and show him who chill you can be." Lassiter bounced lilly and glared at Shawn another moment before 'Uptown Funk' began blaring. Juliet squeaked loudly, shaking Shawn.
"Shawn!" She smiled widely.
"I know." He smiled back before starting to do some very 80's style dancing. Juliet cheered before doing the same, following him into center floor.
"This party is awesome." Marlowe laughed, moving her shoulders to the beat before looking to the couple. "They are quite the couple, huh?" She giggled as she watched Shawn and Jules start to, for lack of a better term, get down. Lassiter smiled.
"Yes, and I'm happy for her."
"Well what about Shawn? He's a pretty cool guy. And he helped his father deliver your child." She looked his chest. "You can be happy for him to, honeysuckle. Lilly is."
"I am." Lassiter said after consideration. "I'm happy for them."
"Good." She said, giggling as she watched her little one do her little dance.
"They do work together in a weird way... Sorta like us." Lassiter smiled, leaning into her.
"Exactly," she took his hand. "And we are perfect."
"A cop and an ex-con, a cop and a PI... It's like cats and dogs, but we all make it work." He gave her a kiss. "Because... We are awesome. We all are." She smiled up at him.
"Come on I love this part!" She tugged at him, dancing lilly to the floor while singing 'uptown funk you up'.
"Yeah." He said, dancing close to her. "Uptown funk you up... Uptown funk you up! Yeah..." She grinned, and the baby bounced along mumbling incorrect words.
"That's right, Lassie, get down!" Shawn hollered, a laugh in his voice. Juliet giggled as she tried to dance to the beat.
"I will, thank you." Lassie answered.
############
"Alright everyone, gather around! Gather around!" Gus said in his radio voice. "It is time... For cake." There was an uproar of cheers-loudest around the area of the groom-and laughter.
"First the bride and her bitch." Gus teased, already tipsy.
"Thank you, Gus." Shawn smiled, taking the microphone from him. "Why don't you go sit down, bud?"
"I will..." Gus giggled, staggering off.
"Cake time!" Juliet said, taking out a knife. Shawn pretended to scream and faint, the microphone now switched off. "Shawn!"
"What, what?" He chuckled as he straitened up and went over to the cake. He placed his hand in hers and they cut out two slices. The couple then smashed their slices into eachothers face. Juliet grinned through the frosting, and Shawn laughed happily licking around his mouth.
"Hey, where did we get this cake, I want my birthday cake from here." Shawn grinned. Gus snorted, and then received a facefull of cake from the ...bride. Juliet's giggle was almost evil, if she weren't so adorable it would have been. He squawked, pulling frosting off and whipping it back. Juliet, as a sober and trained officer, assumed the return fire and ducked only so her chief ended up with a mouth full of vanilla.
"Hit the deck!" Lassie hollered, diving under a table, making his wife and child giggle. Karen glared at Gus, whipping the icing from her mouth and Gus froze in place, frozen in fear. Karen stocked to the cat, clawed a hand full from it and raised her arm high then spun and chucked it right onto the T-shirt Shawn had changed into out of boredom and heat.
"My shirt!" Shawn squawked, flailing his arms abit. "Why me? Why me!?" Juliet ran out of the battle as it began to change from her expensive dress into the sundress she bought. When she returned it looked like frosting had exploded over the reception hall. Shawn and Gus had reached a truce, now behind a table directly across from Karen and Henry. Marlowe and lilly were sniping the other guests as Lassiter took them down from behind.
"Jules!" Shawn tried to waved his new wife down. Juliet ducked a wicked shot from Marlowe and and dove to her husband. "We are against pops and the chief. The others will take each other down."
"Sounds like a plan, your dad is already drunk so he'll be an easy target." She said, scooping up some cake from the floor.
"Karen's our main threat." Gus nodded, peering over the table.
"She's sober and she has a vendetta against you, we need to take her out at all costs." Shawn nodded, licking icing off his face with a serious face. Juliet tried to match it, holding the cake menacingly.
"Right so why don't Gus and I distract them and you go in for the kill?" Juliet suggested to Shawn, peeking over the table and nearly getting hit in the face.
"We should sacrifice Gus." Shawn said, an evil grin popping up on his face. Gus made an indignant squeak, glaring at Shawn.
"That's actually a good idea." Jules said, rubbing her chin. Gus' very manly squawk caught the attention of a mildly drunk Lassiter, who was now stalking towards their table-fort.
"Snipe him, Jules! Snipe him!" Shawn whispered, poking her repeatedly. Juliet, menacingly peering towards her former partner shushed him frantically. Shawn nodded and hid behind his new wife, the being that she would be a body shield. "Get him." He whispered, peering over her shoulder.
"I am!" She muttered, balancing the slice in her hand before slinging it and smack Lassiter square in the face. Then she, along with Shawn, dove for cover.
"This is the best reception ever!" Shawn whispered in a giggly tone of voice. Jules swatted him in an effort to hide from a very drunk and agitated Lassie.
"Its an expensive food fight, Shawn." Gus complained.
"Better then a bunch of slow dancing and mushy gooey... Bleh. This is awesome." Shawn insisted in a whisper, grin still ever present. Juliet gave him an offended little glare.
"You don't want to dance with me?"
"Oh... Uh, well of course I do." Shawn said before kissing her forehead. "But this is a lot more fun and we are still doing it together." Juliet gave him a little smile, shrugging.
"Fits us."
"Yes, yes it does."
##################
After awhile the hall emptied out except for the newly married couple, Henry, Gus, Karen, and Lassie and his family unit.
"Well that was fun." Marlowe laughed as she surveyed the area. Shawn, who was trying to subtly eat frosting off of Gus's back, grinned at her.
"You know that's right." Gus hooked his fingers in his belt loops, unaware of his current job as giant plate.
"This night actually went- went better then I thought it would..." Henry chuckled, leaning heavily on the bars counter.
"Everyone got drunk but us! We got married!"
"Lilly isn't drunk, but she may never sleep again." Marlowe smiled her child, who was licking icing off her little hands.
"Neither will Shawn." Juliet said, watching her husband-who got bored with talking- trying to parkour over chairs.
"Oh." Marlowe giggled, covering her mouth.
"Hey- hey, Shawn! Watch this!" Gus called, trying to jump over a chair, falling on his face. Shawn cackled and copied the move, only to take an even less-graceful flip then flop then disjointed Summersault.
"Good job, boys!" Juliet laughed, clapping her hands. Gus gave her an upset little glare while Shawn stuck his thumbs up.
"H- hey... Hey, Jules, can we turn the music back on? I wanna listen to music." Shawn asked as he started to get up.
"The reception is almost over." Juliet pointed out.
"Private party!" Gus whooped from the floor. Shawn hopped up to punch the air.
"Yes!"
"You're all a bunch of ninny swallows!" Lassiter slurred slight, stumbling over to his wife before half crashing into her and hugging her.
"Oh honeysuckle." She giggled, holding him up.
"Smookums." Lassie nuzzled her before laying eyes on Lilly. "And Lillypad." The baby smiled happily waving her chubby hands.
"When are you two going to give me grand kids!?" Henry slurred at his son and new wife, having just watched Lassie love on his little Lilly.
"Nev-" Juliet gave him a sharp look. "Nineeeee-Te-Eight...six...five! Four?! Three-T-Two! Two years?!" Juliet leveled him with the glard she reserved for criminals. "Two years at the most pop!"
"I'll hold you to that." Henry pointed at him. "If- if you get her pregnant during the honey- the honeymoon... You fail."
"Hey that happened on Gilmore girls!" Shawn whined.
"I'm not having twins."
"Starfish Spencer doesn't get a Seahorse Spencer?" Shawn tilted his head.
"We are not naming..." Juliet sighed deeply. "Honey, we'll talk babies later."
"Starfish is a good name!"
"Honey, stop." She patted his shoulder.
"Never." He leaned over and latched onto her. Juliet laughed, hugging him gently with a slap to his butt. "Oh! Feisty! I like it." Shawn tsked before giving her kiss.
"Boo!" Gus cried drunkly from the floor. "Stupid lovey dovey kids." Shawn stuck his tongue out.
"I thought we were going to get some music in here again?" Karen leaned back in her chair, smiling at the couple.
"Yes!" Shawn ran to the DJ booth.
"Maybe some music will make cleaning up this mess more fun." Juliet laughed, shaking her head slightly.
"I don't wanna clean." Shawn whined.
"It'll still be a party with music." Juliet said, smiling playfully. "A cleaning party."
"But cleaning." He pouted.
"It'll be fun, and when we are done we can all dance for real." Juliet promised.
"Ugh." He stomped towards the mess and prodded a chunk of cake. "So much work"
"Just start some music, you goob!" Juliet laughed. "Something upbeat and dancy." Shawn grinned, running to the DJ stand and scrolling.
"Aha!" He exclaimed, pressing play on 'The Humpty Dance'.
"SHAWN!" Jules scolded, looking positively steamed. If this were a cartoon steam would be blowing out her ears. Shawn giggled happily, doing his version of the dance.
"You love it!"
"Turn it off!" She scooped a bit of cake up and threw it at him."Make it stop!"
"Never!" He grinned before she pounced on him, forcing him to catch her.
"Stop it!" He laughed, pulling her up for a kiss before clicking skip and clearing 'I'm gonna getcha.' By shania twain. Jules broke out into a smile.
"Shawn..." He kissed her again, making her giggle.
"I know what my lady likes." Shawn grinned, giving her a nuzzle. She leaned in and kissed him.
"You still have to clean." She whispered.
"No please." He began dragging her to the floor. "I can't gravity is dragging...me...down."
"Shawn, stop." Jules pulled her arm as she was dragged to the floor. Shawn groaned, crushing her as they flopped to the ground."Shawn! Shawn, get off!" He responded by rolling over and grabbing her face, looking desperate.
"But gravity."
"Shawn, you are five seconds from spending your first night as a married man on the couch." She narrowed her eyes. The novelty of his goofiness was starting to wear a little thin. Shawn rolled off of her as if she were on fire.
"I don't know why you're yelling at me!" He whined. "Its the planets fault."
"Shawn, if you help clean, tonight we can do that thing that you like." She propped herself up on her elbows, giving him a sneaky smile, hoping to convince him. Shawn tilted his head, lips pursed in consideration.
"Can we watch footloose too?" He asked, "With Kevin Bacon, of course."
"Yes." Jules laughed with a nod, starting to get up.
"We could just stay on the floor." He mumbled, making puppy eyes.
"No." She shook her head before giving him a kiss.
"But Juuuuuules..." He whined, kicking his feet. "I hate cleaning."
"While you two were..." Lassie waved his hand, the other propping him up on a broom. "We already started."
"Thank you." Jules smiled, tilting her head at her former partner. "Maybe you could sweep my husband up." Lassiter's face lit up at the thought, already making his way towards his oldest frienemy-who still lay flat on the floor.
"Go get him, boobear!" Marlowe laughed as she watched her mate charge. Jules took a step away from Shawn with a grin. Shawn, startled by the cheers, turned and looked at a stalking Lassie.
"No! Stop dont-" he was cut off by frosting covered bristles. "Lasjdnvkhmerph stuuuphhh iug."
"Eat broom, Spencer!" Lassie grinned evily as continued to try to sweep Shawn up as the man failed to stop him. Shawn kicked his feet, slapping at the broom.
"Sfuuuuuuub!" Shawn cried, smacking he broom. "Efeeeennnn mooooooooonnnn."
"Never!" Lassie cried before Shawn grabbed the broom and started the smack him with it. "Stop it! I'll have you arrested for assault!"
"I'll have YOU arrested for assault!" Shawn flailed.
"Stop." Jules took the broom from them.
"Sorry…" Both men muttered like shamed children.
"Now come on, let's just get this cleaning over so we can have a good time."
"Ohhhh yeah!" Gus shouted and Jules gave him a flat look.
"You're cut off." Juliet tutted.
"You're cut oooff" He yelled, pointing and shaking his finger.
"Guster, I wouldn't argue!" Lassie called from the floor. "O'hara will take your head with that broom." Gus grabbed his neck, eyes wide as he stared at Juliet.
"Y'u could?" He stuttered.
"I totally could." Jules grinned, spinning the like it was a crazy baton. Gus squawked, flailing until he was on the floor.
"Shoooown!" He slurred, "your g'rl h,sssbnd is cray!"
"Girl husband?"
"But I love her anyway, man, true love. True true love." Shawn said as he stood up.
"Girl husband?" Juliet questioned again. Gus and Shawn gave her simultaneous nods, both with the 'uh duh' face on.
"Just roll with it, Juliet." Henry called over to his daughter-in-law. "Some wine might help!"
"No more wine!" She hollered, "you're all smashed."
"He was talking about for you, sweetheart!" Marlowe laughed. Juliet title her head, shoulders dropping.
"Oh," she nodded. "that works."
"Hey." Shawn pouted to himself.
"You too." She decided, "but only a little."
"Booyah!" Shawn did a fist pump. "Alright, cleaning time... Shouldn't be too hard." He picked up a paper towel before accidently squirting himself with cleaner.
"Not hard at all." Juliet teased, taking the towel and dabbing his face.
"Cleaning is evil, Jules." Shawn pouted, sitting his head on her shoulder. Juliet hugged him, patting his head.
"Of course baby."
"Why does it hate me?" He whined, hugging her back. Juliet tried her best not to giggle.
"It just doesn't know you."
"Its jealous because I'm prettier than it is." He grumbled into her shoulder. Juliet patted the back of his head, shushing him gently.
"Of course." She smiled softly at her husband, barely fending off the laughs. "Cleaning is one jealous broad."
"You know that's right." He grumbled.
"Mine c'ch friz!" Gus accused glaring slightly to the left of Shawn. Shawn of course paid him no mind.
"It attacked me, Jules." He whined again. He was making it hard not to laugh, she sworn he was doing it on purpose. "Viciously."
"Yes Shawn, it was horrible."
"I felt like a victim in Criminal minds." He pouted. "Marlin would protect me."
"It's Morgan." Juliet corrected, voice strained.
"I've heard it both ways."
"Yous cich friz!" Gus nodded approvingly.
"No you haven't, Shawn." Juliet shook her head.
"Mine!"Gus complained.
"Don't make me do it again, Jules, it's so vicious and mean." He nuzzled her shoulder.
"Then show it who's boss!" She cheered.
"I'd rather learn to play harp!" Lassiters head jerked up so he could glare at Shawn.
"That one's mine!" Carlton looked horrified.
"Your what, Lassie?" Shawn asked, giving him a wide-eyed, innocent look with his hazel eyes.
"Catch phrase! Is mine!" He squawked, flailing at Marlowe. "He took it! Give it back!"
"Uh... Here you go?" Shawn said slowly before pretending to throw something at the detective. Carlton flailed, pretending to catch it and held it to his chest. He stuck his tongue out at Shawn.
"Uh-huh... You're cut off to, Carlton." Juliet pointed at her former partner. Carlton took on a look of aghast betrayal, making puppy dog eyes at her.
"I have to agree with Julie here." Marlowe giggled. He turned his puppy eyes on her, lip stuck out.
"No, Dada!" Lilly gurgled happily at her father, wagging a tiny, chubby finger at him. He huffed, flailing inelegantly and nodded.
"That's right. You listen. You listen to the baby." Marlowe said, bouncing her little girl.
"Yes." Carlton nodded, "she's the boss."
"You know that's right." Marlowe grinned.
"MIIINNNNEEEEEE!" Gus shrieked, falling over. "Stoop tikin et!"
"You okay, Gus?" Shawn blinked at his friend.
"Nah!" Gus cried, kicking his feet.
"Man... He is really hammered." Shawn said before looking to Jules. "Do we need to take him to the hospital or something?"
"Not yet." Juliet shook her head. Shawn looked to Gus, who was making snow angels... With no snow.
"You sure?" Juliet met Shawn's worried stre, shrugging helplessly. "Maybe we should get him some coffee? I like tipsy Gus more than blackout Gus."
"Yes!" Jules clapped, scurrying to the coffee machine.
"Get some for Carlton to!" Marlowe chirped. Juliet nodded, filling two cups, and scooping sugar into one.
"Marlowe, honeypot." Carlton pouted to his wife. Juliet pushed the cup slowly into his hand and Carlton peared down at it. "I'm sober enough."
"No... No." Jules lifted his hand so the cup was at his mouth. He took a slow sip of the coffee, glaring at the bride as if she was poisoning him.
"Alright, Gus! Coffee time!" Shawn grinned at his friend. Gus lolled his head to the side, blinking up at Shawn.
"Coffee?"
"Yes Gus." Shawn approached him slowly.
"Nooooo..."
"Gus, do I have to get the funnel?" Gus glared in the vicinity of Shawn, shaking his head slowly.
"Whyyyyy?"
"Because you're drunk off your ass. Now drink it." Shawn said, pushing the coffee. Gus sighed, pulling it closer.
"You two are such good friends." Karen smiled at the newly married couple. Gus glared at her.
"Mine BFF." Gus grumbled.
"Don't worry Gus, she was saying we were good friends to other people." Shawn patted his shoulder. Gus grunted, nodding.
"We are good friends." Juliet smiled as she poured coffee down her ex-partners throat.
"I'm grit frend." Gus nodded, sipping the coffee.
"Sure, buddy, now drink the coffee. Drink it down." Shawn patted his friend. Gus nodded, still drinking the coffee and staring at Shawn.
"This has been one of the best days of my life, ever." Juliet smiled, scanning her little family-unit. "Thank you all so much."
"It's no problem." Karen smiled greatly at her. "You'd do the same for us."
"This was the best wedding ever." Shawn grinned. "I thought it would be boring, but it wasn't."
"You thought what?" Juliet turned, hands on hips while Shawn cowered.
"I just wasn't sure, all the weddings are all tears and repeated words." He rambled, flailing. "I mean everyday with you was so amazing I thought this couldn't top any normal Tuesday but it was so wonderful."
"Awwwhh, Shawn." Jules trotted over and hugged onto him. "I think it was wonderful to, you were so sweet. Everything was just perfect."
"Beautiful." Gus mumbles, regaining some sobriety. "And nice, very nice."
"You're right." Juliet before tilting the cup towards him. "Drink the coffee, Gus." Gus nodded, clutching the cup and staring attempt as he drank.
"I never thought I'd say someone deserves someone as amazing as Juliet O'Hara." Lassiter was looking directly at Shawn, to ensure his very important message it through. "And when I say you deserve her it is the highest compliment I could give."
"Awhhhh, Lassie, you do like me!" Shawn grinned. "And how about that speech you gave? Hit it out of the park! Seriously, I'm so happy you agreed to be a part of the wedding, it was important to Jules. Means a lot." Lassiter grunted, a faint blush gliding over his cheeks. "Oh, Jules, I made him blush! How many points do I get for that?" Shawn chuckled, nudging his new wife.
"Twenty points." Juliet granted with a grin.
"Yes!"
"O'Hara." Carlton pouted.
"Sorry." Juliet smiled before looking around as 'Forever and for Always' by Shania Twain started to play. "Awh, Shawn, Shawn, I love this song!"
"Actually," he held out his hand, smiling. "That's why I put it on." She smiled at him, head tilted. "May I have this dance?"
"Yes, you may." Jules giggled, taking his hand and letting him pull her close before whispering lyrics softly in his ear, her breath tickling his neck. "This was a perfect day." She mumbled, resting her head on his shoulder.
"I agree." He whispered back as they rocked back and forth, the others looking on.
