DINCHT

Authors Note: I do not own FF8 or any of the characters. I do not own the track Stan either, so Eminem don't sue me!!!

This is a song in Eminem – Stan style but Zell is singing about hotdogs. Enjoy! R+R!

My teas gone cold I'm wondering why I got out of bed at all,

the morning rain drops on my window, and I can't see at all

and even if I could it would all be grey

but your smells coming from the hall

it reminds me it's not so bad, it's not so bad.

Dear Cafeteria Lady, I wrote to you but you still ain't answering

I left my pager, dorm number and mobile at the bottom.

I sent 2 letters back in autumn you must not of got  'em

There was probably a problem at the post office or summit

Sometimes I dribble hotdogs juice when I got em

But anyway fuck it, so hows your hotdogs?

I'm about to be addicted

Last night I had a hot dog and guess what I called her.

I named her Bonnie

I read about your uncle too and I'm sorry

My friend blew up to when he ate to many hotdogs.

I know you probably hear this very day but I'm addicted to hotdogs too

I even got the out of date ones you did last week

I have a room full of pictures and half eaten dogs, man

I like that shit you did, giving that kid hotdogs cos he broke his leg and couldn't walk back to the cafeteria line

Well I'd like you to do that for me to

Hit me back, just to chat

Your hotdog lynch, this is Dincht

My teas gone cold I'm wondering why I got out of bed at all,

the morning rain drops on my window, and I can't see at all

and even if I could it would all be grey

but your smells coming from the hall

it reminds me it's not so bad, it's not so bad.

Dear Cafeteria Lady,

You still ain't called or wrote, I hope you have a chance

I ain't mad I just think its fucked up you don't give me hotdogs

If you didn't wanna give me hotdogs yesterday you didn't have to.

But you could of given one to Matthew, man

He's like a brother to me, man, he's only 6 years old

We waited in the line for four hours and you just said no

That's pretty shitty man, he likes them more than I do

He wants to have them to

I ain't that mad though I just don't like being lied to

Remember when we met last week you said if I asked you politely you would send em to me

See I'm just like you in a way I never knew my father either

He always used to cheat on my mum and eat hotdogs

I can relate to what you're saying in your hotdogs

So when I have a shitty day I grab a plate and eat them all

Cos I ain't got even got shit else see that shit helps when I'm depressed

I've even got a tattoo with a hotdog across my chest.

Sometimes I even cut myself to see how much I bleed

It's like adrenaline the pain is such a sudden rush for me

See everything you say is real and I respect it cos you cook it

My girlfriend jealous cos I talk about you 24/7

But she don't know you like I know your hotdogs

No one does

She don't what it was like for people like us growing up

I'll be the biggest fan you ever lose

Sincerely yours Dincht

PS I need more hotdogs too

My teas gone cold I'm wondering why I got out of bed at all,

the morning rain drops on my window, and I can't see at all

and even if I could it would all be grey

but your smells coming from the hall

it reminds me it's not so bad, it's not so bad.

Dear Missus I'm-the-only-one-to-make-hotdogs

This will be the last package I ever send your fat ass

It's been 6 months and still no hotdogs

I don't deserve it

I know you got my last 2 letters

I wrote the addresses on them perfectly

So this is my cassette I'm sending you

I hope you hear it

I'm in a car right now

I'm doing 90 on a freeway

I drank a fifth of vodka

Dare me to drive?

You know that song by Phil Collins

About that guy who could of saved that other guy from drowning but didn't

That's kinda how this is

You could have rescued me from drowning

Now it's to late and all I wanted was some lousy hotdogs sent to my dorm

I'm on a thousand downers now and I'm drowsy

I love your hotdogs they kicked ass

But you've ruined it now

I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it

And when you dream I hope you cant sleep and you scream about it

I hope your hotdogs eat you up and you cant breath without me

*screams*

Shut up bitch I'm trying to talk

See cafeteria lady that's your new assistant screaming in the trunk

But I dint slit his throat  I just tied him up and put a hotdog down his throat

But he's obviously eaten it

Well gotta go I'm almost at the bridge now

Oh shit I forgot how am I supposed to send this shit out

*crash*

*splash*

My teas gone cold I'm wondering why I got out of bed at all,

the morning rain drops on my window, and I can't see at all

and even if I could it would all be grey

but your smells coming from the hall

it reminds me it's not so bad, it's not so bad.

Dear Dincht,

I meant to right to you sooner but I've just been busy

I've been cooking hotdogs just for you

Look, I'm really flattered you called your hotdog that

And here's a hotdog for Matthew, he really is like a brother to you

I'm sorry I didn't see you in the cafeteria, I must have missed you

Don't think I did that shit just to diss you

What's this shit about you like to cut your wrists to

All you need to do is go to the cafeteria  line and I'll give you one

Don't mind me saying Zell I think you need some counselling

To help your ass from bouncing off the wall when you need a hotdog

How many do you eat in a day? I gave you a week supply

I really think you and your hotdogs need each other

But maybe you need to cut down on them a little

I hope you get to read this letter, I just hope it reaches you in time

Before you go crazy without no hotdogs

I think you'll be doing just fine if you just relax a little

I glad they inspire you but Dincht why are you so mad

Try and understand that I do like you eating hotdogs

I just don't want you to do some crazy shit

I've seen this one thing on the news a couple of weeks that made me sick

Some dude was drunk and drove his car over the bridge

And they found my new assistant with a hotdog down his throat

And in the car they found a tape but didn't say who it was to

Come to think about it, his name was…it was you, damn!

Oh well gotta make some more hotdogs.

The End