WARNING: THE FOLLOWING STORY CONTAINS ADULT LANGUAGE AND ADULT THEMES.
It's true. It contains swear words, violence, mentions of sex, and terrible jokes. I don't even know why I say that it contains adult themes. It's probably useless, since kids are still going to read this fan fiction. *sighs*... Aw, kids these days! get off my lawn!
The following story is also probably not that good. It's also the author's first fan fiction, and English is not the author's first language... so... yeah. This story may not contain a lot of quality. I have no idea why anyone would expect some kind of quality from fan fiction, though.
Ok, you've been warned.
You can proceed to read this... thing.
In the year 26XX, our planet has become the home of mutant animals. Most of them are peaceful, and live together in harmony. However, a lot of them are criminals, and a lot of them are admired for their abilities in stealing precious gems. But there are three of them who are more famous than the others. They are more dangerous. They are more skilled. They are better at theft, escaping authorities, knowing how crime works, and in which ways they can get away with it.
They call themselves… the SEGA (Severely Erratic Government Haters). The reason why they're called SEGA, and not SEGH (which would be the correct acronym) is because they're not really good at spelling. It is worth noting that they have spent a large portion of their lives wearing fedoras with slogans such as "2 KOOL 4 SKOOL" or "CORECT SPELING ARE 4 NERDZ" written on them.
The leader of SEGA, an anthropomorphic hedgehog, calls himself "Sonic". The reason why he has chosen such a nickname is due to the fact that the steroids he takes give him a great advantage in terms of running at a fast velocity. He is very proud of himself, extremely cocky, and his past crimes have given him an immense pride. It leads him to believe that he has the right to insult, and physically hurt anybody. His ugliness has been exaggerated by his weight problems, that are a just a proof of his excessive consumption of chili dogs.
The second member of SEGA is Sonic's sidekick (who is more of a grunt, although Sonic has dismissed this claim in the past), a very sensitive red-haired fox. He has the unhealthy tendency of stuttering, shaking and twitching excessively, because of his anxiety that is a result of SEGA's leader wanting him to collaborate for thefts and crimes. He has been named "Tails" by his mother due to a birth defect, but it is not rare to see him being affiliated to other nicknames such as "Fails" or "The freak of nature" by Sonic. Tails has a lot of skills in building various pieces of technology that range from weapons of mass destruction to sex-toys, and Sonic often commissions Tails to build those things (albeit sex-toys being commissioned more frequently). The reason why Tails has such incredible talent in robotics is unknown. However, a rumor states that when he was younger, the fox would often drown his sorrows by reading books about understanding how robots are built, in order to forget how terrible his life truly is.
The third member of SEGA is an extremely violent and fierce echidna, who aspires to resolve every problem with violence. Although his real name is "Franz le Troisième de la Haute Bourgeoisie", he likes to call himself "Knuckles", because he takes much pride in his brute strength. After having brutally slaughtered and raped his mother, he was condemned to jail for the rest of his life. Sonic helped him get out in exchange of his eternal fidelity to the leader of SEGA, and a large tattoo with the name of the crime organization on the echidna's left arm.
Together, they are dedicated to stealing all the emeralds this world has to offer. They would do anything to get their filthy hands on them, because they need to use those gems to buy drugs. Cocaine, PCP, heroin... these products are their only reason to live. And yet, SEGA's illegal activities may end soon. For a scientist named "Doctor Eggman" has been sent to Earth in order to bring order back.
