The silence inside Kate's apartment was like soothing music to my ears, and for a glorious moment I was deaf to both the raging storm and Kate's endless whining. The moment was fleeting, however, and my headache began to throb again with a vengeance when Kate slammed the door. I cringed and reminded myself why I was willingly enduring this torture; ah yes, Kate had a bullet hole in her shoulder, and I would do anything for the woman I loved. Hazardous as it might be, I was determined to stay here until she came out of shock and started healing from the inside out. The shooting was not her fault, but Kate refused to discuss it and now I had to nurse her wounded pride along with her bandaged shoulder. I fervently wished I could consult a copy of the Secrets of Kate Beckett handbook, but alas, it was not to be found, so I was on my own. One day I would write that handbook, but not tonight. If only the drummer in my head would take a break, if only the storm would stop, if only, if only.
"Misery loves company, sweetie, so let's be miserable together."
"Don't sweet-talk me, Castle. This has been a crappy day, and I suspect it will get crappier now that you insist on staying here to distract me from my suffering. Just think about it - I might scream, stomp my feet and tear my hair out; you might get in the way and get injured."
"That sounds kind of scary. Are you in pain? I'm in pain, I could use some drugs."
"Your pain is irrelevant, Castle."
Ouch. I could have easily turned away to escape the wrath of the Beckett monster, but I had a better idea: a Castle hug. Kate's warm slender body fit perfectly into my arms, and once she stopped struggling and realized I wouldn't squash her, she seemed quite amenable to my subtle explorations. During that epic hug, Kate easily sucked all the energy she needed directly from me, and in doing so, squeezed me so hard that my headache became a distant memory. By the time she released me I was weak, aroused and swaying on my feet. What had I gotten myself into?
"Thank you Castle, I really needed that."
"We should repeat that every hour; studies show that close contact with loved ones speeds the healing process."
"Don't push your luck."
"I need to get you into bed, little bird."
"Say what?"
I just smiled and steered her towards the bedroom. "Knock three times when you're decent. Hey, do you remember the song by that Tony guy? Knock three times on the ceiling if you want me, twice on the pipe?" The downward contortion of her mouth indicated that she did remember. "Do you need help getting your clothes off, sweetheart?"
"I'll manage. Sweetheart? Oh please."
"Do you prefer darling? How about honey? Babe? Snookums? I'm quite willing to help you get naked, sugar."
"I think we're done here."
Off she stomped, dark eyes flashing, and I admit I laughed out loud, but quietly. I ran to grab our bags and returned just as three solid knocks resonated on the bedroom door. Hmm, what was more important, the location or the number of knocks? I took a deep breath and weighed my options – face the dangerous woman in the bedroom and listen to the storm, or watch mindless television and listen to the storm. Caution was appropriate as I stuck my head around the door, but she was already tucked safely into her bed. I wavered uncertainly at the threshold, wondering if I should invade this sacred sanctuary; this was her bedroom after all, the haven of intimate and soft feminine mysteries, where a man like me could get lost forever. Bravely, I crossed into unknown lands and lingered in the dusky light to stare at the ghostly white face on the pillow. Within moments, I was swimming in the essence of the woman, and a bouquet of aromas heavenly aromas lifted my brain to a state of euphoria.
"Castle, what are you doing?"
"What? Oh, just thinking wildly inappropriate thoughts." The invisible threads that connected our eyes pulled me to her side, and my hands reached out to caress her face. My touch seemed to bring calm, for her worried expression softened into one of peace, and I was scarcely breathing while I waited for her next words.
"Sit with me." She stared pointedly the empty bed space beside her, so, with pounding heart I climbed up and stretched out.
"I'm sorry for abusing you, Rick. I've been terrible company, but please know that I am truly happy that you're here. I think I'm still in shock, and I'm going to need your strength to hold me together."
I took her hand and met her gaze head on. "I have strength enough for both of us, so bring it on. You're my little bird with a broken wing, and I'll help you fly again. Use my body, touch my soul; take whatever you need from me Kate, because I'm all yours tonight."
"Such sweet, brave words. Thank you so much."
The bed was soft and warm, and while I pondered ways of prolonging my visit, inspiration hit me and I sensed an adventure about to unfold. "I have a surprise for you, little bird. Don't speak, just listen with your heart and feel your misery drain away." I closed my eyes for a short minute and concentrated until the buried words of poetry bubbled to the surface of my brain like long-lost friends reuniting for a party. Rain provided the background music as I rhymed out lines about sunshine, flowers and frolicking woodland creatures. Kate pretended to doze, but there was a mischievous grin on her lips, and at times her dark eyes would suddenly fly open and fix on me, causing me to stammer, but I kept on rhyming until every last word was used up. My reward was a genuine smile.
"That was so beautiful, Richard; you're such a hopeless romantic."
"That's me. I love to dabble in poetry, but it's been some time since I improvised on the fly. I hope you'll go to sleep with pleasant visions of me dancing in your head."
"Well, actually, honey pie, visions of you dancing? Not so much…"
"But Fred Astaire is my middle name! Just you wait, one day soon I'll twirl you on the dance floor until you swoon in my arms, and then I'll kiss you until you faint." This brought forth an undignified snort followed by a hearty peel of laughter, and the sweet sound of her giggles tickled me right down to my toes and I just had to laugh along with her. Suddenly, Kate was yawning, I was yawning and I realized it had been a long 24 hours.
"Where will you sleep, Richard?"
"Right here with you, little bird. Tell me, am I correct in assuming that you're naked under that sheet?" Kate smiled like a pixie, snuggled under the covers and was asleep a few seconds later. I hesitated for only one moment, then stripped down to my boxers and nestled in as close as I dared. Her warm naked body screamed at me to touch, but I was all too aware that touching would lead to other things, and likely to me getting shot by the gun under her pillow. My loins strained to stay civil, and I realized I would have to be very careful indeed, so I compromised by holding her limp hand against my face and then I closed my eyes for just a wee nap.
I jolted awake in a panic at the sound of a thunderclap ripping the world apart. The heart-stopping boom was followed by a blinding flash and yet another crash. "Huh? Wha?" Foggy-brained and disoriented, I was sure I felt a warm body part under my hand, and when I opened my eyes my suspicions were confirmed. Gulp. "Don't shoot me," I pleaded, as my eyes were pulled like magnets to the two shining pools lying beside me in the gloomy light. They observed me like a predator might size up its prey.
"Touching things again, Castle?"
"I fell asleep and was guided to you like a moth to the flame." There was no laughter now. "Um, sure, okay, I'll remove my hand from your body now." I peeled my hand from her breast very slowly, certainly enjoying the texture of that perfectly sized mound under my palm. Funny how I didn't feel the least bit guilty, almost like my hand belonged there. I shifted onto my elbow and regarded her intently. "I know what you're going to ask, but remember, it's warmer with me here."
"Yes it certainly is. I've been watching you sleep, you're quite a specimen."
Was it hot in here? I pulled off the covers and, like an addicted bum, reached out to touch her cheek, but I couldn't stop there. Velvet skin flowed under my hand as I caressed her breast and belly, and when met with no opposition, I continued my journey along her shapely thigh and down the endless length of her leg until I touched her toes. She didn't move and I was numb with desire. "Your skin is so soft, it feels like satin."
"I can't decide if I should kick your ass or seduce you."
"Seduction has a very nice ring to it." It certainly did, but this line of talk was leading into new and dangerous territory. "Sweetheart, neither of us is thinking straight right now; I'll get dressed."
"No, please don't go, Rick, I need you here beside me."
I inhaled and released a long shuddering breath as her warm fingers crept towards my chest and began exploring. It was the moment I had dreamed of, that first tentative caress from the woman who could set my heart on fire with nothing more than a smile. I wanted her to keep touching forever, but a shocking vision of me burning in hell reminded me that I needed to make a dignified exit before things got out of hand. I figured I could talk about the weather, because chit-chat about a storm was a sure winner to reduce sexual tension. "You realize, little bird, if this rain doesn't stop soon we're going to have to shop for an ark and start collecting animals."
Kate laughed that beautiful, golden laugh and I fell out of bed just in time to avoid a kick. I knew her gaze was on me, because her eyes burned like lasers into my back as I sauntered towards the window. I opened the curtain and couldn't help but gasp at the sight: raindrops smashed into the window like pellets from a million guns, and black clouds swirled close enough to touch. Memories of yesterday's horrors hit me hard; the freaked-out perp had whipped out a pistol and wouldn't listen to reason. Shots cracked, Kate fell, and the perp dropped dead a moment later with Ryan's bullet stuck in his heart. I couldn't have written a more devastating crime scene if I'd tried. Blood gushed from the guy's shredded chest, and Kate was on the pavement with a red stain blooming on her shirt and a bewildered look in her eyes. She passed out in my arms and I cried like a baby right there, sobbing and dripping tears all over her. I shook my head to break the trance and tore my eyes away from the window. It was all history now, and Kate would be fine.
"Castle, what are you looking at? What's happening out there? Oh hell, I'm getting up to see for myself. Help me get this thing on, will you?"
Kate was sitting on the bed and struggling with her nightgown, and in the next moment the satin gown was in my hand. I pressed it to my face and inhaled her scent in the fabric. Kate stood up. I lowered the gown over her head and watched, transfixed, as it flowed like liquid gold over her naked body, settling on curves and stretching luxuriously to accommodate the sling. Lightening flashed again, and at that very second in time, Kate was illuminated to me in her true form. "You are a goddess, and I am your servant." Her long fingers curled around my naked shoulder.
"You're trembling, Richard."
Yes, I was trembling. The goddess reached out to stroke my cheek and I kissed her fingers with my humble lips; we walked together to the window to observe mother nature's fury.
"Such incredible power and awesome beauty."
"Just like us." I could only whisper, while I gently pulled a wayward hair from her face.
"We belong together, Richard. Look at us, we've been fools, and life is too short."
"I want to kiss you."
Kate lifted my hand to her breast, and I guided her hand to rest on my pounding heart. We searched for truth, closer and closer until our bodies touched and we both gasped out loud with the shear power of the contact. I pulled her up against me until there was no more space between us. Our lips brushed together in mutual curiosity, but we both held back for fear of greed. Kate's voice was barely a whisper against my mouth.
"Kiss me Rick.
"Shhh my love…" I parted her lips with mine and began the kiss I had waited so long to deliver. There was no hurry, for I wanted this kiss to be a cherished memory for the rest of our lives, I wanted to talk about this kiss when we were old and gray in rocking chairs. Our four lips molded together perfectly into one as we began to explore in earnest. Her daring, succulent nibbles teased my mouth and soon our tongues danced the tango like old lovers. The sexual energy was unrelenting, and it sucked me in so deep I was frightened of never resurfacing. Kate moaned and I eased off, for this kiss was fast leading to a place we were not prepared to go. She clung to me, dropping more hot kisses on my neck while I struggled to keep control.
"Woman, you're intoxicating." Another thunderclap jerked us back to harsh reality and Kate sagged exhausted onto my shoulder. Worried, I scooped her up in my arms and carried her back to the bed. "The ark will wait till morning, little bird." Despite her protests, I settled her under the covers and then moved in as close as I could to warm her up. Just then my stomach growled.
"Do you have any food in the house?"
"Typical man."
"The last thing I ate was a sandwich in the hospital cafeteria. You don't want this manly muscle to waste away, do you?"
Kate cursed out loud and pushed hard against me as she struggled to sit up in the bed. I sat up with her, suspecting the worst when her body started to shake and the words fell out like a stream of fear. She turned to me with wild eyes, "what's going to happen, Rick? I don't know what to do; what if my shoulder doesn't heal? I can't sit at a desk all day; I need to be out on the street with the action. This mess is all my fault and now I'm in trouble. I need you, Rick, please stay with me. Oh God, I'm sorry, I just can't stop it."
I hugged her to me just as a sob rose in her throat and the cascade of hot tears began to gush onto my skin. "Just let it all out, sweetheart." Kate's anguish was almost more that I could bear, and I found myself close to tears along with her as I offered comfort with hushed words and a gentle hand. The healing had begun. The minutes ticked by, it was impossible to know how many had passed, but the tears stopped and Kate fell asleep on my chest. Her strong, steady breathing made a nice warm patch in the puddle of tears, and I noticed that her face was nestled right there in that perfect spot on my body. It was a special place created just for her, and she had found it. I knew it was time for me to speak those beautiful, frightening words that were both tickling and burning in my throat. I whispered, hoping she would hear me in her dreams.
"Kate, I love you with all my heart, please stay with me forever."
She stirred but did not wake up. I pulled the covers over us and snuggled her closer to me. I smiled. Yes, this was my place in the universe. This was our time, and in the twilight silence of this sacred room, all of my troubles and doubts flowed away like a waterfall in the rain. I closed my eyes, and soon enough the musical, hypnotic splatter of raindrops on the window lulled me into an irresistible doze. The storm didn't matter; it could rage and bluster forever, because my woman was in my arms, safe and warm.
The end
