I closed my eyes and took a shaky breath as Dr. Redbough confirmed my worst suspicions.
"Jack, I'm sorry," He said, "but she's been comatose for six months now. You know what must done. Everyone else knows but you. Why are you delaying the inevitable?"
I sighed unsteadily. "Because..I can't give up on her, Doc. I can't."
He stared at me with pity. "Jack, she won't be in pain. There's no chance of recovery. She would want you to move on." He put a comforting hand on my shoulder. I shrugged him off, but took the pen he was holding out for me.
With a heavy heart, I signed her last chance away.
"If," I started hopefully, even though I knew it was fruitless. "If she wakes up before it...happens-"
"She won't, Jack," Dr. Redbough stated with a sigh. "She's practically brain-dead."
"I know," I whispered softly. I looked up at him with tears in my eyes. "Can I tell her goodbye?"
He smiled at me sadly. "Sure. You know the room. You have twenty minutes."
I stood but turned back in a second. "Doc? Can I… can I be there? When it happens?"
He nodded pityingly, and I thanked him graciously.
I left the family room and walked slowly down the hall, toward room 804. She had been in room 112 at first, but after about two weeks they moved her to the eighth floor. Said she would be more comfortable. What they really meant is that she was a lost cause, and they needed more room for critical patients.
I pushed open the door cautiously, in case anyone was in there. Jerry. He and I had taken shifts throughout the whole ordeal, watching her, waiting.
He let go of her limp hand and walked over to me. His eyes were puffy, but he still gave me a smile.
"Yo," He said softly. Since Kim's accident, he'd become more serious, but still hadn't managed to lose his signature greeting. "Is it...decided?"
I nodded glumly, dazedly, without looking him in the eye. He ran a hand through his hair whilst taking a shaky breath. Jerry turned back to me, and his eyes sparkled with understanding and tears.
"I'll go tell the guys," He choked, before leaving the room quickly. It was my turn to say goodbye.
I pivoted toward the blonde lying on the clean white hospital bed. Throughout the past six months I'd talked to her, read to her, and brushed her hair - I knew when she woke up she'd be really embarrassed if it looked bad. I'd waited for her.
"Hey," I said softly, grabbing her small hand. "listen, okay? They're going to take you off life support. They think you won't recover. I know that's not true. I need you to say something. I...I know your parents are waiting for you up there, but I'm waiting for you here."
I wiped my eyes fervently. "We all will miss you terribly if you go. I've...Kim, I've done something awful. I signed them. I signed the papers.
"I'm just...I'm feeling so small, Kim. I don't know where you're at or if you're even still here. I tried, Kim, I really did. I waited for you. We all did. Jerry tried to wake you up with his Colombian War Chant." I smiled weakly.
"I would follow you anywhere, Kim, you know that. But, I can't follow you where you're going. I wish I could, and I would in a heartbeat, but I can't. You need to say something," I urged. "Just say something, and this will all be over."
Kim stayed peacefully unmoving. Why wasn't she waking up? I thought hysterically. "Kim," I said, panicked. "You've got to wake up. I need you. We need you. Without you, we're-we're a bunch of chickens with our heads cut off, just stumbling around. We need you! Please don't go, Kim!"
I clasped her hand tightly, my shoulders shaking. I would not cry. "I… I love you, Kim. I know we've only been together six months - well, a year if you count the last few months when you've been unconscious - but I've loved you long before that. I know I'm still learning how to show it. I will show you, Kim, if you just wake up. I'll show you every day for the rest of our lives. I'll marry you. Goddamn it Kim, just say something." My voice cracked and I shook with sobs.
"I'm giving up on you, Kim! Don't you get it? I'm so sorry, Kim… I'm-I'm sorry I couldn't save you." I sounded hysterical. If I didn't start controlling my breath, I'd pass out.
Tearing my eyes away from the silent blonde, I looked at the clock on the wall. Ten more minutes.
I swallowed my pride and got down on my knees, still clutching her hand. "You're the one that I love, Kim, but I'm saying goodbye. I'm saying goodbye, Kim. Please answer me. Please tell me goodbye too!" I sat on the floor and cried. Five minutes.
I lunged up off of the floor, sobbing hysterically, and grabbed Kim's tiny shoulders. "Say something, Kim! Say something!" My tears dripped on her face, but she did not stir. "I'm giving up on you! You have to wake up, Kim, just say something!"
The door burst open, and in came Dr. Redbough with a group of other doctors and nurses. "Jack," He gasped.
"No!" I shouted as they pulled me away from her, putting me in the corner of the room. "I'm sorry, Kim! I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry! Kim! Kim! Just say something! You can do it!" The doctors began unplugging her from her machines.
"Say something, Kim!" I shouted at the top of my lungs as two doctors restrained me. As if in slow motion, Dr. Redford removed her from the breathing apparatus. I waited with bated breath for her to open her eyes, to sit up, to run into my arms.
"Say something," I whispered.
Flat-line.
A/N: Not what you were expecting? Sorry. I don't know if this turned out how I wanted it to, but oh well. Here it is. PM me if you have questions, or just leave me a review. Please. I'm begging you. I'm all alone here. Also, little question here: which version of this song do you like better, the one with or without Christina Agulera? I like the version without.
~PurplePenguin13MI
