Possession
Rated: M
Warning: A few swear words and some dark implications of rape but nothing too graphic.
Disclaimer: I own nothing but my delusions. Please don't take them from me, they're all I have.
Sorry there's no beta on this. Feel free to point out the errors.
On an average day a gathering of these particular people wouldn't have garnered a second glance. They seemed to have been gathering together since school began. Sometimes they were loud and rambunctious, other times they seemed thoughtful or preoccupied but never before had this group seemed so…sad or lost.
Despite the depressing feeling that seemed to emanate from the group no one tried to console or approach them. Everybody knew that their group wasn't complete, they had all heard about the disappearance.
Some gossiped that he'd run away tired of the competition of being forced to keep up his grades. Others said that he'd simple gotten bored with the school and those in it and head for another city or country. Some of the less savory people claimed that he'd gotten a girl 'in trouble' and they had both been sent away to avoid disgrace
This group ignored them all, they knew that it was nothing as simple as all that. After their last mission they had all promised to tell the others why they were leaving if it was going to be for a long time or at the very least they would find some way to alert the others as to the reason.
There had been no contact this time. He was with them for their last meeting to exchange information and to plan a future attack. Then he left, supposedly to go home but he never made it. They hadn't worried at first; he'd done it before after all. Took a whole week to train and when he came back he been yelled at but what made him promise was because of the look of worry in her eyes. After that he agreed that to keep that look away he'd follow their rules.
This time they gave him a grace period of four days, more than enough time to send a message if he'd gone to train at the last minute. Nothing came. Amazingly enough it had been his father who had first spoke his concerns to the others, asking if he was training with them or perhaps even on a mission. Still nothing.
"It's been three weeks already! How much longer is it going to take?" An orange-haired female asked of her fellow companions her voice starting on a high pitched note before progressing to a whimper. After wiping a tear off of her cheek she brought both hands in front of her stomach again and clasped them tightly in a vain attempt to stop them from trembling.
"Those damn cops, they're dragging their feet!" The onyx-haired girl that had just spoken accentuated the frustration in her voice with a hard punch to the wall of their classroom. None of the others were exactly surprised at her actions. Even considering that she was the only other girl in the group none of those gathered would dare consider her to be girlie.
"Calm down, Tatsuki. You're only upsetting Orihime more." A male voice cut off her tirade as he placed a hand on Orihime in an attempt to calm her down. While few of those gathered would have tried to stop Tatsuki in the middle of a good rage none were surprised that the ginger-haired male didn't hesitate to.
Sensing that Tatsuki was getting ready to turn her frustration on the one who spoke Orihime attempted a brave smile while addressing his concern, "it's okay, Ichigo; I'm fine."
All assembled could see the lie for what it was but it did serve its purpose at turning Tatsuki's outward rage off. The dark head dipped as Tatsuki sighed deeply.
"I'm sorry, Ichigo. It's just so frustrating. Not just the fact that I'm not able to do anything but-" Tatsuki bit her lip as she raised her head and focused her eyes on his. "But to not even know anything. It's just awful."
"I know." Ichigo agreed as he gave one last squeeze to Orihime's shoulder before returning to his place against the wall and next to one of the last and closest of his fighting friends, Chad, a dark-haired and dark-skinned teen who gave a small grunt to show his agreement about the frustration with the lack of information. None were offended at the seeming lack of concern from the teen as he had always seemed to prefer actions to words.
Indeed Ichigo knew how frustrating it was to know nothing. Since they had discovered that 'The Last Quincy' was missing him and his friends, living and non-living, had been searching non-stop in as many worlds as possible. Theories abound as to his fate yet despite all of their hard-work and dedication; their attempts so far had proved futile.
Ishida had indeed appeared to vanish from existence. Ichigo himself had gone and confronted the Quincy's father thinking that his lack of knowledge was a lie and succeeded only in getting himself banned from the hospital that the man worked at. They had all questioned everyone that they thought might have had a grudge against him and the allies that they had questioned had ended up also being recruited into the now desperate search.
The last two males in the group had kept mostly quiet knowing that their ability to help out was the least of those gathered. They could only hope to help keep the spirits of the others up and to show their support of them and their efforts. Even if the only support they could offer at the moment was silence.
The bell signifying the beginning of class ended further talk as they took their seats and tried to turn their concentration towards the meaningless material that they were supposed to learn that day. Thankful the teachers also seemed to be somewhat compassionate about their plight and as such let them have extra time to make up the assignments that they missed during their frequent absences but they also knew that the teachers wouldn't remain that way for long so they tried to focus their minds on the lessons.
The day was terrible, progressing too slowly and too quickly at the same time. Ichigo couldn't concentrate at all the drone of the teachers voice easily lost in the background while his mind wandered back checking and double-checking that he'd thought of everybody who might know anything about the whereabouts of the Quincy.
He wasn't sure why this struck him so hard, they weren't really friends at most you'd call them friendly rivals. Yet he felt a great amount of unease when he thought about someone kidnapping him. Ichigo supposed he wasn't that surprised, he did consider himself to be a protector. What kind of protector was he if he let his personal feelings get in the way of keeping those around him as safe as possible?
He also hated the thought of Orihime being sad; she and the Quincy had only just started going out. Now he had to see her succumb to the sorrow in her eyes more and more every day. He hated being powerless. He hated not knowing what had happened or what was happening. Was Ishida even still alive? Who had him and why? He hated it! His angry thought translated itself into action as he snapped the pencil he didn't realize he was gripping.
Those around him glanced briefly but turned their heads quickly at the sight of the scowl upon his face, deeper than it normally appeared.
Ichigo could only stare at his still white knuckle grip as he ground his teeth together. The feeling he hated the most was the feeling deep down that said he was overlooking something…something important.
The darkness was the worst. He could live with the lack of food and the minimal water. The silence that he felt was going to drive him insane was tolerable. Even the abuse that his body had gone through so far and would no doubt go through again was something he could focus him mind past but the lack of light that was truly horrible. He had no idea how long he'd been there. He only knew that he was always cold, though the cold did have one advantage. It helped to numb his body in a way that his mind couldn't.
But what he wouldn't give to feel the heat of the sun or even just be able to acknowledge the time that continued to tick by while he was imprisoned. He gave up trying to loosen the binds on him after the first few days back when he could be more positive of what day it was. When he could feel the days by the indirect heat on his body before he'd been taken to the darkness and kept there.
Sometimes he hated his mind and its capacities, its strengths and weaknesses. He knew that he'd been moved twice so far, he could remember that. He also believed he knew why he'd been moved. The first place had to have been close to where he was attacked, it was merely a quick drop off until a more suitable place had been found.
He had though that the place after that was where he'd been kept the longest but he noticed that despite the lack of light there was almost always a lot of noise there so that apparently made it too risky. Not that he could have alerted anyone anyway. The initial attack had damaged his throat or vocal cords somehow. He still wasn't sure how only that his throat felt like he'd swallowed broken glass and that whenever he tried to speak only a slight rasp came out.
The next move brought him to the silence that had accompanied him the most, not that he complained about the silence. He'd rather be left to the silence than the one who travel in it so well. That however is what made the silence so dangerous, he felt tempted to drop his guard but his attacker traveled the silence well. He'd learned the hard way that there was no safety in the quiet of the eternal night.
He cursed himself for the thousandth time for not noticing the threat that was apparently around him when he left their last meeting. If he had noticed then he wouldn't be here waiting in vain for a rescue whose odds he knew were too great for anyone to truly keep hope for.
He cursed his mind for the reality it refused to acknowledge. Logically he knew he was trapped where he was until he was dead or until his captor got tired of him. But his mind continued to cling to hope, hope that all that his captor really wanted was a challenge to overcome or perhaps even something as simple as a ransom.
Mostly he cursed his mind for the fact that it seemed to adamantly keep hold of the memories of what had happened to him. His body knew what had happened to it, it didn't need his minds help.
He was hungry and thirsty but mostly he was tired. Tired of this.
"Hello, Ichi-nii." Yuzu called in a sad greeting to her brother as he entered the house after another long night of searching for his friend. She went and reheated the dinner she had made him earlier knowing even at the time that her brother wasn't going to be joining the family for the meal.
Since Ishida had disappeared her brother had gone to search for him every night returning well after dark, sometimes not coming home until it was time for her to go to bed. Always worried that he wasn't eating enough she would always cook him something that would taste just as good being reheated as it did when it was fresh.
She pretended to believe him the next morning when he said he ate it all and she pretended to believe that he rarely ate breakfast because he was still full. She also overlooked the fact that sometimes she heard him leave in the middle of the night after everyone was supposed to be asleep so that he could keep looking for his friend that much longer. Instead she made sure that while he was home he didn't have to worry about a thing and at night before she went to sleep she said a pray that Ishida was okay and that her brother would find him.
Karin rarely saw Ichigo during that time because she was also looking for Ishida. After she saw Ichigo's expression that first night she started looking on her own. She didn't know much about Ishida and wasn't really too concerned at first but she did love Ichigo and she remembers the last time he carried that expression. She promised herself long ago to do everything in her power to keep that look from his face again. Before she was unable to do much about it, he was too secretive and she was too young but like her brother she keeps her promises and it time to do so.
So like her brother she hunts for information but only during the day, her father refuses to let her out at night but while she's home she can help her brother by making sure he eats at least a little. She also helps with the chores that he's supposed to do because she doesn't want to burden him with mundane things. She also covers for him on the rare occasions that their father works late but calls the house to check-in and asks if he's there.
Isshin know that his children are lying to him, that they pretend many things so as not to worry him.
Ichigo with his need to be strong because he doesn't want others to suffer the same pain he's felt.
Yuzu with her constant fear that she isn't strong enough to do more.
Karin with the same need to protect others, including her brother.
He's sad that he can't support them more because of the decisions of his past but he's also proud of the fact that they are so strong and loyal.
He's also determined to help not only his son find his friend but he's also determined to help his old friend in finding his son. So he begins to search as well, at first alone then with his old friend/rival.
Rumors are all that greet them, rumors that something powerful walked the streets that night and a few nights since but nobody has seen a thing. One interesting thing they learn is that 'It' apparently only walks at night. Interesting but ultimately unhelpful because, despite their searches and the patrols of others, they have yet to come any closer to this powerful being that may hold the information they seek.
But still they seek. And hope. Because he hates to see the expression on his friends face as much as he hate to see it on his children's face.
During the day she can pretend that she is strong, she can bring a smile onto her face and she can speak of hope.
The night is different it won't allow her to fake anymore and as the sun sets Orihime's tears fall unhindered once again.
She wants to keep hope alive but at night as first the days and now the weeks pass she finds herself lost to despair more and more.
They had work so hard and had overcome so much. She had gotten over her crush on Ichigo and he had gotten over the fact that she did and does love him. He claimed it didn't matter because he knew that she truly loved all of them. For everything they had survived they had found true happiness with each other.
Their friends had been happy for them after all they too knew the darkness of the world they chose to protect and would never begrudge any of the group their happiness. Apparently to the others it wasn't much of a surprise to learn that they had fallen for each other, though Ishida himself was the one to sum it up best when he said 'it was only natural that with the way they were almost always together that she would fall for someone from their group.'
She could have chosen someone outside their group; she knew that she had admirers throughout school. They loved her body and she knew it but they also treated her like she had nothing but her body going for her. The thing she loved most about their Ishida was that he never spoke down to her.
At first she was simply a burden to their group, a non-fighter to be protected. Then she showed that she also had skills as a fighter but more importantly to the entire group was that she was a healer. At first she resented that she couldn't pull her own weight with the others but Ishida pointed out and explained her importance as a healer.
She owed him so much, more than she could ever hope to repay but she also loved him and missed him. As the tears continued to fall she once again wished that she could prove beneficial to the group. She wished with all her power that she could bring Ishida back to her safely.
As the suns last rays finally died and darkness surrounded everything she gave in to her despair once again. And prayed.
Ah, my precious. It's so good ta see ya agin.
Yer gettin' better at sensin' my arrival.
I love seein' ya bound like tha' but ya know what I enjoy most? I love seein' ya struggle as I touch ya.
I almos' love it better'n actually touchin' ya. Almost. Nothin's really better'n feelin' the softness of yer skin or th' feel of the muscles as they flex when ya move.
Buckin' at me or archin' away from me, the feel o' ya is truly exquisite.
But th' thin' I think I love th' most, yer protest.
My first attack worked well ya can't call fer help but I can still see yer protest. In every flinch, every raspy moan an' every tear tha' ya shed fer me.
Ya truly 'ave no idea how long I dreamed of gettin' hold o' ya. Ya should feel honored about th' time I put inta this. I really planned a long time fer this, all th' little angles an' back-up plans even ya'd have ta be impressed with th' many facets o' this plan. So much could've gone wrong, 'nother could've come along as I was grabbin' ya or worse tha' little bitch could 'ave come along.
Ya should be happy tha' she didn' 'cause nothin' would 'ave made me happier than ta kill her. Ya've got no idea how long I've been watchin' ya, how long I've wanted ta touch ya. Make ya mine.
But I'm showin' ya my devotion now, aren't I? I'll keep showin' it ta ya 'til the day we die.
None of their searches turned up anything. Defeat is ugly. None of them enjoyed it during battle but it was even more devastating now when their defeat meant that a companion was lost.
They coped as best they could. Orihime still cried at night but also found solace in Chad though they both knew that she didn't love him the same way that she loved Ishida.
Chad still joined in the few searches that continued but he also devoted a great deal of his time in trying to make Orihime happy.
Tatsuki focused her lingering frustration into her punches. The intense focus resulting in her perfecting her martial arts forms even more so.
Isshin supported his former rival in his sorrow and tried to lift his spirits with reassurances that nobody has lost hope.
Ryuken continued to hide his emotions behind annoyance. Annoyance at the world and at the Shinigami that refused to let him grieve what he knew was lost.
Ichigo still felt the odd emptiness in him and as a way to try and alleviate it he continued the searches.
"Tonight makes it two months doesn't it?" Yuzu asked Karin sadly as she set the table for dinner.
"Yes." Karin wanted to say more but honestly didn't know what more to add.
They still supported their brother and his hopeful searches and ignored when he didn't eat. They also continued to pretend not to notice when he left in the night or when he returned from his searches dirty and tired and slept most of the next day.
Their love also made them overlook the nightmares that interrupted his sleep.
Nightmares with flashes of white and black. Of paleness being engulfed in darkness and laughter that sometimes followed him to wakefulness.
Ichigo didn't eat that night he remembered what day it was. Instead he went to bed early, hiding the tears of frustration that filled his eyes as he also remembered his helplessness.
That night when Karin was already asleep, Yuzu heard hear brother getting up and quickly poked her head out the door to see her brother's slouched form heading down the stairs.
"Good luck tonight, Ichi-nii. Try not to stay out to long." She felt reassured when he grunted and waved his right hand over his shoulder before heading out of sight.
Laying back in bed she also prayed once more that tonight her brother would be successful in finding his friend this time. For all of them.
It's been so long since I've been here. I wish that he'd just kill me or just let me die. Instead he continues to show up every few days making sure I have food and water, keeping me alive for his pleasure.
I still wonder how the others are doing. I also wonder, and hope, that they are still looking for me but I'm also still logical so I doubt that they hold much hope for me. Lord knows that I don't hold much hope for myself anymore.
Now there is only me and the darkness. And him.
His tainted words and touches. His tainted love.
How could I not have seen his desires before? I can't help but think if I had noticed before then I could have avoided this situation to begin with.
I'm not a fool; I know who my captor is. Looking back I'm surprised it took so long to realize it, especially after I heard him speak for the first time. His voice is so recognizable now.
These last few days…weeks…months…years? I've lost all track of time here there are only two times that matter, times with him and times without him.
Every visit he makes I try to separate my mind and my body's actions because I hate myself for enjoying him but it's because of those times that I've come to recognize whose energy it is that surrounds me.
The darkness doesn't benefit him as much anymore because now I can tell when he is there.
Like now, I can tell that he's been there for the last couple of minutes. Most likely staring at me.
Heh, so ya can tell I'm here can ya?
Ya're still so beautiful.
Ya know wha' I love the best?
Now when I touch ya, yer body responds so perfectly.
"I tol' ya tha' we were meant ta be. Tha' ya were made fer me."
Removing yer blindfold as I lean for a kiss I'm rewarded with the sight o' lust in yer eyes.
Now I know my victory is complete.
Yes I see the victory in your stolen eyes and as miserable as I am, I hope that you, the real you, never finds out the truth because I know that it will haunt you as it haunts me.
Ichigo.
A/N: Eh, Happy Valentine's Day?
I'm sorry if this was confusing but basically it's about Ichigo's lack of acknowledgement about his feelings towards Ishida and the subsequent consequences of that action, his desire caused Shiro to take over and capture Ishida. Ichigo has brief moments of remembrance of the acts Shiro commits but only in his dreams.
I hope that it wasn't too confusing. Feel free to ask any questions you need and I'll answer to the best of my abilities. Also I apologize for Shiro's speak it was hard to produce; I hope that I did it justice.
I'm also at a loss as to which characters to list as the main pairing so if you have an opinion please tell me, I'd greatly appreciate it.
