Author's Notes: This is a response to a prompt on the Star Trek Kink Meme. The prompt was "5 teachers Jim Kirk banged and the one that banged him." I cheated a few times by manipulating the meaning of the word "banged." I'm just evil like that. Each part will be posted seperately, as that's how I posted them on the Meme.

For this particular part I would like to say: Jim is 18. There is sex of the Kirk/OFC-I-will-never-use-again variety. It is not explicit by my standards, but could be for some. Be careful. Consider that your warning.

Pairings: Kirk/OFC, Kirk/Pike (sort of), Kirk/Spock

Rating: M for sexual themes and language

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not a thing. Not even the inspiration for this fic as it came from the Kink Meme. I am not making money off of this. Please don't sue. (Because all I'd be able to give you is my cell phone, a dodgy laptop, and my battered copy of Sherlock Holmes.)


In the Name of Education

1. Jim Kirk learns that sex can fix all his problems.

It's one month before graduation and the principal is being a dick. Jim knows he can be a royal pain in the ass, but he just doesn't think it's right that the principal is actually trying to find a reason not to let him graduate. He's already not letting him walk and Jim didn't even start that fight! How was he supposed to know that girl had a boyfriend? How was he supposed to know he went to school with the guy? The guy just came up to him and clocked him in the middle of the cafeteria. How was that his fault?

Well, Jim and his mother had tried just about everything to get the principal to let him walk, but the son of a bitch wouldn't have it. So, Jim went home to a very disappointed mother every day and had no idea how to make it better. At least he was still getting his diploma.

Jim works part time at a bar and grill. It doesn't pay much, but at least once a week he finds someone to go home with. It's one of those slow nights when he sees someone familiar at the bar. It's his guidance counselor (which is a very strange experience). She'd tried her best to get the principal to cave, but the asshole wouldn't budge. The least he can do is talk to her, since she's sitting all by her lonesome. Jim notices two things during his conversation with her: she's gorgeous and she's completely hammered.

Jim (because he's a good kid and not because she's gorgeous and not because his bike totally died on him yesterday) offers to drive her home. It's surprisingly easy to get her to agree and she turns over her keys. It's the least he can do, right?

They fuck in the backseat. Jim doesn't know how she's coherent enough to push him against the passenger's side door, straddle him, and take her panties off over her heels. Jim is certain he couldn't have done that sober. He doesn't really care how when she unbuttons his slacks. They're still mostly clothed and Jim really hates dress pants and the way they stick to his thighs when he thrusts upwards. If it didn't feel so goddamn good (and if he didn't have to wear them again) he'd have ripped the fucking things off. It's not the best sex. She's drunk and comes minutes before Jim is anywhere near thinking about orgasms, but he keeps going until they're both gasping for breath.

It takes five minutes for Jim to realize that he's extremely uncomfortable. His head is at a strange angle, the lock is pressed awkwardly into his neck, his left shoe is currently MIA and his right leg is hooked, somewhat strangely, around the driver's seat. They climb out of the car after they've righted their clothing, searched for and finally found Jim's shoe, and he walks her to the door (it's the least he can do). He catches a bus home.

Three days later he gets a letter in homeroom informing him that not only will he be getting his diploma and walking in the ceremony, but there's nothing anyone can do to stop him. It's signed by the principal and his guidance counselor. When Jim shows it to his mother she says, "I always knew she was a good woman." He replies, "Oh, yeah, she's great." He never explains the double entendre.