They said there'd be snow at Christmas
It was cold outside- bitterly cold.
They said there'd be peace on Earth
He could still hear the dying echoes of screaming men and women.
But instead, it just kept on raining,
A veil of tears for the Virgin birth
He can't help but wonder what the point of it all was.
Whether or not there was a reason to continue.
What did it matter, anyway?
People laughed, people cried, people lived and people died.
What did it matter?
I remember one Christmas morning
He was tired.
God, he was so damn tired.
A winter's light and a distant choir
And the peal of a bell
That Christmas tree smell
It was completely silent, nothing stirred in the dark, cold night.
He could only smell blood- it pervaded every sense.
The once white snow was drenched in red, covering his body, numbing his fingers, filling his mouth with a bitterly metallic taste.
And their eyes, full of tinsel and fire
He wasn't sure whose blood it was that streaked his neck, not anymore.
There had been too many curses yelled, too many bodies thrown, too many hearts dashed open on the white ground before him for him to remember.
And of course, there had been him.
Choking back a dry sob, he turns his head to the side and catches sight of a blank stare.
He closes his eyes.
They sold me a dream of Christmas
Oh, they sold me a Silent Night
They told me a fairy story
'Til I believed in the Israelite
The Christmas's from his childhood are bleak, he remembers.
His stocking had been filled with his mother's disgust and his father's disapproval.
But his teenage Christmas's….why, those, those were worth remembering.
Tinsel and pranks and feasts and ornaments and mischievous eyes that gazed out at a castle in excited speculation.
Yes.
Yes, those were worth remembering.
And I believed in Father Christmas
Looked to the sky with excited eyes
He wonders if he is about to die.
The silence that is pervading his soul seems to foretell it, after all.
He raises his eyes up to the black sky, searching, searching for something, anything, to show him that there was a reason to live, to continue, to endure on and on and on.
Then I woke with a yawn
In the first light of dawn
And I saw through him and through his disguise
He wanted to spit on the ground in disgust at his own foolishness.
Dreams were for those with futures.
Those with hope.
And he had no time for that.
No dreaming.
Not for him.
I wish you a hopeful Christmas
I wish you a brave New Year
If only he could move.
If only he could summon the energy to look around him once more and remember those faces that are already blurring in his hazy memory.
All anguish, pain, and sadness
Leave your heart and let your road be clear
He can feel everything disappearing.
And once again, he tries to go back to why it all started, why he ever bothered to fight.
He can't remember.
They said there'd be snow at Christmas
They said there'd be peace on Earth
Hallelujah, Noel, be it Heaven or Hell
Far, far away, as voices start to whisper and feet start to run,
A bell tolls.
The Christmas we get, we deserve.
Hello all(: Yes, it is slightly morbid, and no, I don't know if he died. Although this is a songfic (my first!), I didn't really listen to the song as I wrote- I was looking towards the lyrics and listening to I Can't Make You Love Me by Bonnie Raitt. Oops :P Oh well.
Anyway, please review! :)
-FantaFaerie
