In my form of perfect world, Adam's mother died when he was 7 and he grew up with the winchesters ever since.
There are really just not enough, or not at all Adam stories to please my needs, so I decide to make me some myself. hurt \ comfort and brotherly love and you know, just the usual "aww" experience.
- So I know I wrote that I like to pretend Adam lived with them since he was 7, BUT actually in this thing I wrote I made him 12, and his mother died more or less year ago. Dean is 19. Just brotherly fluff and chick flick moments. it starts kind of out of nowhere.
"Hey. What the fuck with the attitude?"
Adam remained silent. His gaze stuck on the floor.
"Come on, level with me here. What's wrong?" A new hint of desperation attached to Dean's voice.
The entire day Adam was just plain annoying, puting on attitude that really was not like him. And by this point of the the day, Dean was starting to lose his patience.
Dean sighed, and was about to turn around, if Adam wanted for whatever reason to play to silent game he'll just let him be; when Adam finally looked up, all big green expressive eyes.
"I miss her." He Whispered. His voice trembled a bit.
Shit.
And did Adam knew how to play Deans heart strings, and he felt such an ass for being even just slightest mad at the kid.
Sometimes it was easy to forget he was just a kid. A kid who less than a year ago lost his mother, in matter of fact, saw his mother corpse after being eaten by gouhls. That would traumatized anyone, and to say Adam dealt good with it would be an understatement. Sure at times he would get moody and quite but overall he had allways kept his appearance as a happy normal kid. His thought were soon cut back when Adam continued.
"It's hard." His eyes grew impossibly bigger and watery.
"I know" because what else he could say?
It's weird, the range of emotions that little brothers can make you feel, and Dean may know Adam for a little less than a year, but that did not change the unconditional love and care he had for Adam. And in that moment in time, Dean just felt pure anger. He was furious, for the fucked up world they lived in, for the fucked up life they had. Dean was used to it, that's the life he grew up to. But THIS, this wasnt fair. His heart broke for the kid in front of him, shattered, really.
Adam was biting his lip, trying with all his force to hold his tears inside.
Dean showed him gently the way to the couch where he finally, finally broke.
He never really thought about it. The call about Adam came a week after Kate's death. John Winchester is not really easy to locate, and even then it took them 3 days of driving. So by the time they came it was nearly two weeks after- and so he actually never got to saw him cry, never saw him this vulnerable.
It was hard to explain but Adam had a way of getting distant and yet growing closer with them at the same time. As if he shut himself from showing emotions, but yet letting himself trust his new family, and showing them more and more different sides of his personality.
And it was times like this that made all of Deans big brother instincts kick in and wanting nothing more than to hold the kid infront of him, pretending that with a hug, he would make all of the bad things go away, sheltering him from the world, and protecting him from anyone and anything that could ever, harm the boy.
And Dean held him.
And Adam cried, strangled sobs and this stupid stubborn kid continued on trying not to let go.
And dean did not "shushed" him nor he tried to say anything- because what would he say? saying "It's ok" was a total bullshit.
Losing your mother is a lot of things, but most certainly it's not ok, and Dean knew first hand. So he just was there. Offering brotherly comfort he was so used to give Sam.
The vulnerable side of Adam was a side he never showed, he even sheltered it.
As if being vulnerable was preserved to his mothers eyes only, and showing any kind of weakness would be admitting his mothers lost and coming to terms with it.
So Adam cried. And Dean would never admit it, but he might as well got a little teary eyed too.
It's not ok, but it'll get better.
