There lived a Whiterun Guard in Whiterun.
Whiterun Guard was born as a Whiterun Guard
Whiterun Guard grew up as a Whiterun Guard
Whiterun Guard was trained as a Whiterun Guard
Whiterun Guard is a Whiterun Guard
Whiterun Guard was sad. Whiterun Guard was not being a true Whiterun Guard and instead was being like all the other Whiterun Guards. "Let me guess, someone stole your sweetroll?" A Whiterun Guard said to Whiterun Guard.
Whiterun Guard just stared at the other Whiterun Guard and said. "No brother, I am sick and tired of STICKING TO GAME DIALOG YOU USELESS PILE OF FAIRY DUST?.!"
A Whiterun Guard pulled out his sword and said, "You have committed crimes against Skyrim and her people, what say you in your defense?" Whiterun Guard just shucked his sword to the floor and began jacking off Whiterun Guard's helmet. Whiterun Guard tugged harder and harder and finally Whiterun Guard gave up and used some oil to help get it off. It came off smoothly and now Whiterun Guard was free of Whiterun Guard's helmet. Whiterun Guard was no longer a Whiterun Guard. Whiterun Guard was now a Maskless Whiterun Guard