A/N: So this is the first fan fiction that I've ever really written let alone posted online so excuse me if its not that good. Also review and let me know what you think of it, I'm a pretty insecure person especially with my writing so if you have any suggestions and complements maybe review and let me know. thank you people of earth! oh and sorry if you don't like it, but I love the outsiders just as much as you do, maybe even more.

Disclaimer: I do not own the outsiders, just my character!

xXx

Chapter 1

It was 12:30 am, my back was strained and sore for all the unpacking I did today. Especially since I was unpacking alone. When we first got to Tulsa my mom started applying for jobs like there was no tomorrow, we hadn't been here four days until she had five jobs and was working all through the week. My mom normally likes to save the weekends for herself. She calls it " mommy's happy time" although there's nothing motherly or peaceful about getting violently drunk every weekend and beating your daughter. Today I finished unpacking the kitchen which has to be the biggest room in our kind of tiny run down home, my mom and I have never been real fortunate. You see after my dad died my mom had some trouble supporting both of us with all of the small jobs she was only able to get. I guess that's why she drinks on the weekends because its her only escape from stress and society. I think that's how she also tries to cope with my dads death. When he first died she went through depression more serious than anything. she would put on slow Elvis songs, hold herself, rock herself into oblivion while drinking bottles of bourbon day and night. When some of the folks I lived around heard about this, well they threatened my mom to call child services and take me away to a girls home. I don't know what made her sober up a little to start working but she did soon enough and busied herself with jobs. I was real glad she did I was beginning to think she didn't love me at all. I couldn't imagine being in a girls home, and in New York at that.

Yes, New York. Born and raised. Even though I'm awful shy around folks I don't know real well I still hung around a lot of people. In the city I had connections, its weird considering I'm shy and quite but my dad knew a lot of people in the city and so did my mom. When their pals heard they were tying the knot they said their kid would be legendary. I'm far from it. I loved new York it was my home. the city gave off a pretty chill vibe if you knew the streets well enough and had more friend than enemies.

The only thing bad about my part of the city was the really bad murder rap. That's the reason we moved. My mom said she didn't want me getting mixed up in all that crazy shenanigans. My moms the only thing that confuses me in life. Yeah she gets drunks and beats me but she's not like that all the time. If I'm lucky some weekends she wont even go near a drink. She'll wake me up in the morning and make me breakfast, take me out to have fun at the zoo or even the carnival or local fair. If we stay home she'll read me my favorite childhood books and takes naps with me. it may sound kid-ish but it means an awful lot when your mom has been mentally absent since the age of eight. And at night she'll tuck me and her in my bed and sing to me. Its complicated but simple at the same time. The simple part is I love her and she loves me, she's just been through a lot in life and came out messed up. if I had one wish I would go back in time and stop all those things from happening to her, but we all know that sixteen and a half isn't the age for wishing.

I sat down on the couch I moved in yesterday and smoked a cigarette for a little while to relax then put it out to go take a shower. As I let the hot water hit my back I realized how late it was and my mom wasn't back yet, it was Saturday, technically Sunday since it was one am. Thank god my mom went to bars this weekend to drown her sorrows in pools of liquor, I wouldn't wanna show up on the first day of school with bruises all over my face. When I dry off I put on warm pajamas and head to bed. I close my eyes and feel the cool breeze gently swipe across my face as I relax and quickly fall asleep. I dream about my dad that night, smiling, laughing, cracking jokes making everybody smile. Including my mom.

A/N: Sooooooo how was it? sorry if its too short but I was trying to explain her background and where she's from. Also sorry for the title I know its tacky but I'm not really that good with titles :p And don't forget to review my lovely's, I would love to know if someone other than my friend likes it. also sorry if it takes me forever to update because I have this written on paper and I have to copy it. See ya!