A/N: im tired of the lack of karmagisa so you know what I did
Pairing: karma/nagisa
Full summary: Karma moves to America leaving his unrequited love behind. Nagisa never knew of Karma's affection until the moment he said goodbye. Now, that Karma is half way across the world and Nagisa stuck in Japan, can he move on or will his love for Nagisa prove more fruitful than he thought?
The day is January 1st.
The day Karma left Japan for the exchange program. He wouldn't be back for four years.
Class E arrived at the airport an hour before Karma's flight was scheduled to leave. Everything was normal that day, we joked and played around as we waited but, there was this gloomy air as we all tried to forget that we were losing a classmate and a friend. Sure, Karma was a troublemaker that had a tendency to be excessively blood thirsty but, I think that underneath his confident exterior was a fragile human being. I'm sure I wasn't the only one who sensed it.
It was almost 8pm when Karma's flaming red hair wondered in through the airport doors. He had a on this thick pure black jacket with white lining around the hood, zipper and cuffs. He wore a black scarf and that was placed low enough where you could see his cold breath from the air outside. His eyes searched the board for his flight, until something must have caught his eye. First, his eyes moved to look out of the corner of his eye and then once he confirmed what he saw he turned to see his classmates and alien teacher waving and sending him warm smiles. His eyes grew wide but, they never left mine. He had locked his eyes to mine, at least that's what it felt like.
I have always had this feeling that Karma looked at me more than others. I never questioned it much because he's one of my closest friends plus he's Karma so you can never really know with him. I could feel his gaze when we were together or just sitting in class, I thought that I was just imagining it but, whenever I looked back at Karma his eyes never wavered as if he wanted me to catch him.
I averted my eyes awkwardly while trying to smile back at him. He approached us in his usual leisurely manner. His hands were firmly placed in his jean pockets when he walked up to me. "I didn't know you were coming."
I smiled shyly but, the question was answered by Kayano. "Of course we would! You're our friend!"
Soon after her statement he was bombarded with "Yeahs!" and "Obviously!" and immediately they all attacked Karma, each girl gave him a hug, Rio stating that it was unfair that the only eye candy in our class was leaving which stirred up the guy's jealousy a bit.
But, in the end even Terasaka was able to give Karma an awkward goodbye.
Once everything had calmed, Karma approached me while everyone continued messing around. It was only a few more minutes until Karma needed to go get checked in. I gave him a small smile. "Are you ready to go to America?" I questioned, knowing Karma he'd adapt pretty quickly, but I don't know how he'll deal with his violent behavior over there since being in class E gave him an outlet but, now that he's leaving; he won't be able to take part in the assassination unless Koro-sensei goes to America or he comes back and that second option probably ever happen… I know from the internet Americans tend to go overboard during fights but, maybe that's the sort of thing could satisfy Karma.
He answered right away, moving to my side. "Hmm. I don't know. I'm not good at English so that'll be a problem."
"I have no doubt you'll be able to get the hang of it quickly." I answered fairly confident in my judgement of Karma's character.
He smirked playfully, removing his hands from his pockets. "I'm glad you have such confidence in me, Nagisa-kun."
I scratched my cheek out of habit. "Hah- well- it's not like you need my confidence, you have enough of that for all of us."
"Yeah." His tone was flat like he wasn't satisfied with that answer. "There's something I need to tell you, Nagisa-kun."
I looked up at him with curiosity, why was his voice so serious? "What is it, Karma-kun?"
He stayed silent while he stared the floor, his bangs were covering his eyes so I couldn't see anything. His fists clenched at his side when he suddenly looked up at him with so much intensity and determination in his eyes more determination I've seen my entire three years of knowing Karma.
"I'm in love with you, Nagisa-kun." He voiced out slowly making sure that his voice wasn't too loud or too quiet, almost like it was rehearsed.
The initial shock faded quickly, I blinked really fast and pinched my cheek to check to see if I were dreaming but, then again, why would I dream about Karma confessing to me? It's not like I have feeling for him beyond friendship? Right?
To surprised to say anything else I whispered, "What?"
His eyes held a sadness in him after watching my reaction. "I only started noticing these feelings for you after I had transferred to class E. That's why I was always staring at you, I never felt this way before so it was suspicious, you could say. I was really confused when I realized that the reason my heart beats so fast when I'm with you is because of romantic feelings. I didn't think I could experience childish feelings like this but, the more it lingered the more I found myself getting jealous of those who touched you so easily… I know it's impossible but, I decided that I would tell you before I left so I can finally put it behind me."
I tried. I tried so hard to voice my thoughts but, nothing could come out. I was stuck standing there with my eyes wide and mouthing different words trying to get something, anything out. It just wasn't happening.
"You don't have to say anything." Karma smirked half-heartedly. "You can just forget that I said anything. I know you never thought of me as anything more than a good friend and I'm happy with that but, we can't be friends anymore."
Like he read my mind, he answered my question before I could ask. "You probably don't want to be friends with a guy who's in love with you and I don't want to be friends with the one I love, that would be too hard." He paused, his poker face was crumbling. "I need to go now."
Before I could even protest, he walked ahead to say bye to everyone one last time. He walked over to the check in stand, he waved back to us one last time. Then he was gone. He didn't look back once as he entered the terminal areas and for some reason there was drop in my stomach.
Suddenly, a wrapped around my shoulder. It was Sugino. "I hate to say that I'll miss him. "
We watched Karma disappear through the terminal entrance. I had the strong urge to scream for him to come back, to stop him, to tell him what he wanted to hear but, none of those words seemed to be in my vocabulary right now. I managed to gulp down some salvia. "Yeah. Me too."
Probably a lot more than I expected too.
A/N: sorry about this.
