A/N This is inspired by something one of the Xena cast members (Rob Tapert maybe?) said during a commentary of some sort. It was something like: Xena tells Joxer to "Go take a hike up that hill six miles away," and how he's blissfully unaware of their relationship. Wow, that was vague, but anyway, this was born.

"Hey, Joxer!" Xena called from where she was sitting by the fire, next to Gabrielle. "We could really use some birch bark to replenish our stores." Joxer looked at her, a bewildered expression on his face.

"What's a birch?" he asked, puzzled.

"It's a big tree, with white bark that bursts into flame with barely any prompting."

"Hmmm…" Joxer paused to think. "I've never seen any of that."

"There was some a little while back, a few candle marks before you joined us. It was just over that hill about six miles that way," Xena informed him, pointing back the way they'd come.

"Well, if you saw it then, why didn't you get any?"

"Because," Xena said through gritted teeth, I didn't know we were out."

"Oh. Ok." With that, Joxer set off.

"Xena… I've never seen any birches in Greece," Gabrielle said, a doubtful look on her face.

"I know, I just really needed us to be alone." And with that, Xena pounced on her adorable little blonde.

"Joxer the mighty! He roams through the countryside! He never needs a place to hide! With Gabby as his sidekick, fighting with her little stick!" Joxer sang as he sauntered along the path. "Hmmm, birch trees, birch trees, where are those birch trees?" he asked himself, peering around. He'd been walking for about an hour, and he'd made it at least a couple miles, so they couldn't be that far off.

After another hour or so, Joxer's decided he'd surely walked the full six miles. "You know," he speculated to the empty air, "I'm starting to think that there aren't even any birch trees in Greece." He paused for a moment to think. "There must be some super important mission, and Xena needed me here. But then, why wouldn't she just tell me?" He continued walking, speculating on this new conundrum. "Oh no! What if Xena knew that the camp was surrounded by warlords? And she knows that I'm the only one who could save her!"

Having come to this conclusion, Joxer decided that the next logical step was to rush back to camp. Double-timing it, he managed to make it back in an hour, and he was panting as he neared the campsite. By now, the sun was close to setting, and he'd been gone for a little over three hours. What if they've been captured? I'll just have to follow their trail and save them. With this in mind, he burst through the bushes surrounding their camp. "Xena! Don't worry, I'll save you!" he shouted. Then, he paused to look around. The camp was in perfect condition. "Xena?" He looked around some more, before his eyes fell upon Gabrielle and Xena, curled up together in Xena's bedroll, their armor and clothing scattered around them.

"Hmmm, They must have fallen in the river, so they laid out their clothing to dry," Joxer concluded, despite the fact that the clothes were in no semblance of order. "Then, they must have crawled in the bedroll to warm up. I'll just leave them to sleep." Joxer then skipped off, whistling the tune to Joxer the Mighty.