The following is a bit of a take on Video Game Confessions which belongs to the comedic genius of Doug Walker of Channel Awesome. Pokémon belongs to Nintendo and the Pokémon Company. And to make this more fun to you the reader, I suggest putting on the theme from Video Game Confessions ( /watch?v=tCrrZ1NnCuM )
Anime Confessions – Jessie
You're introduced to a young man of African descent about 5'9'' with a lean frame. His hair spiked and black with eyes of light gray. He wears a typical outfit of a bartender for a fancy restaurant.
"This is Ryo. Ryo works in the seven star restaurant known as the Tori Dragon Palace (which is two blocks away from the Pixel Palace). There, some of anime's most popular celebrities pop in to have a drink. Sometimes, they share stories, and even secrets. Because—as we all know—what the bartender hears is confidential... isn't it?"
Jessie
So here I am working the bar late at night and in walks in, Jessie. Now Jessie is one of the foxiest women that I know personally. She, James, and Meowth were regulars during the second season of Pokémon. However around the Unova seasons and beyond, it's only really Jessie who keeps it consistent on visiting. So she walks in her Team Rocket wear and I was going make her usual drink. However, she just asked for a cranberry juice.
"Ok, Jessie. Fess up, whenever you don't drink, something's up." I ask.
She traces her finger around the glass looking a bit sad when I asked what's with the long face.
"I don't know if I can go on with this show anymore. After Unova, I don't know if I can keep going with it. The twerp and his little girlfriend flew the coop already and I think I could be doing the same thing next." Jessie said in a low tone before raising her voice a bit. "I was a big hit back then. Beloved for being a villain, but after Unova, I was hoping for the writers to get us out Team Rocket. Ash isn't the only cursed failure."
I could agree. Ash came here when he failed any league, the trio (until around Unova) were coming here every time they failed at getting Pikachu. The result would be James getting into bar fights, Meowth going home with one of his fangirls drunk (Lucky bastard!), and Jessie dragging James home after he got his ass handed to. I always wondered about their relationship. Funny, I never asked about it.
"So Jessie, what is James to you? Boyfriend or something?" I asked.
She downs her drinks and says this completely deadpanned, "Friend with benefits."
The thing is that I could believe it.
"With the crap scripts, we have each other to vent out our frustrations. When we're not in an episode, we're fucking each other senseless." Jessie said as I pour her more juice. "But I could see why you and the fans could think we're a thing. To be fair, we could be. If only I didn't swing around, and James didn't have his hang ups on commitment."
If anything, I knew about that issue of Jessie when it came to swinging around. We chatted for a bit before her depature bidding me "Best Wishes!" Ugh…don't remind me if that series.
However, this isn't the end of my story. One week had past, and the Sun and Moon was out with no older fans giving a damn about it. However, Jessie came into the bar looking completely panicked. So I ask what happened to her? She tells me she's pregnant and my jaw hangs off my mouth.
"Uh…am I the father?" I asked.
She gave me a look and said, "We didn't have that kind of sex, remember?"
That's when I remember the events of our little fling (I'll leave it to you what we did), but I digress. So, I asked who the father was. Jessie spills that it's James and she needs advice on what to do. Of course, she's already quitting the anime, no doubt. However, she wants James to come with her. Now that's an issue. The guy pretty much is so adamant about being independent.
"Well James has always been my side through thick and thin. And if he's a true friend, he'll stick by your side." I said this to encourage her.
Well it did work out, James immediately give his middle finger to the writers and his parents before leaving with Jessie. Meowth went along too and now the company is scrambling to replace them. From what I hear, the execs did replace them, but fans don't approve. They brought Cassidy and Bitch…I mean Butch. Jeez, they could use the Team Skull grunts! Either way, I'm glad Jessie and James left. Rumors say they moved to Kalos and Jessie is perusing a career in being a performer. Good for her. I haven't really seen them since then, except for James. He came in and punched me in the face today. He was kind of pissed at me for my little fling, but that's the price I say. Totally worth the bruises on my jaw.
You see a lot of strange things as a bartender, see a lot strange things at the Tori Dragon. So, I see a lot of strange things as a bartender at the Tori Dragon, and that isn't no lie. Swear to it!
(A/N: Took about an hour and change. I have to admit that these shorts are fun to write, and I figure if anyone has rights to stick to the writers, it would be Jessie, James, and Meowth. Any requests for what anime character you want to see on Anime Confessions? Leave it below! 10/13/17- Final Edit)
