Title: As It Once Was.
Author: mirage_delgado
Fandom: DC Universe.
Characters: Donna Troy
Disclaimer: DC Comics owns all. (And Superboy, too. Who knew?)
Author's Notes: XXXX

"If this is the best of all worlds, what are the others like?" Voltaire, Candide.

[The present.]

Donna Troy knows there is no air in a vacuum, but she feels a light breeze gently ruffle her hair. She also knows that the laws of science say there is no sound in outer space, yet she can hear the wind's soft howl as it echoes throughout the crumbling ruins of this ancient metropolis. Just a few of the many incongruities on Day 9,168 of the rest of her life, another day wherein things don't make a bit of sense. Another day she wakes up confused and pissed off.

Pissed off because it was her morning to open the library, but she had forgot to set the alarm and had overslept (again) and the last thing she needed was her boss cursing her up one side and down the other for being late (again) and so she found herself half dressed, in a frantic search for her car keys (for a car that doesn't exist) before she catches herself. Catches herself shaking her head, telling herself that life wasn't hers, it never was yours, you stupid ass, only the memory of it and why are you crying anyway?

Most of her days start off like that, in a state of confusion, panic and perpetual deja vu. It usually fades, like a half-remembered dream, the first few minutes after waking up, but not today.

Today she walks the lifeless streets of New Chronus. She returns to her childhood home (one of many) whenever she needs to clear her head or finds herself in need of a new beginning. She starts by asking the question she's asked herself everyday for the last four hundred and thirty six; Who is Donna Troy?

The answer, in order: Amazon. Daughter. Sister. Photographer. Heroine. Widow. Unique. Alone.

She knows she should talk about this with Mother or Diana or Dick. But she won't. She knows they would be sympathetic without understanding and she really doesn't see the point of it. She's almost unable to comprehend it herself, let alone up to the task of explaining it to family.

But if anyone ever called her hard enough on it, she would put it in these terms: Once upon a time, there was no life. No worlds, no stars, no universe. There was nothing but the darkness of The Void. Into The Void came The Light. The Light replaced The Void with the universe - The One. Eons later, The One became an infinity of worlds with an affinity for life, until Infinity reverted back into One (and would again become, if not truly infinite, then Many.)

Naturally, all sentient life assumed that the universe had been just the One, period. This was wrong, but understandable. The great Crisis had reset everyone's perceptions, probably for the better. The knowledge that the whole of Creation truly is infinite...such knowledge is dangerous to the human mind. Revelation brings awareness. Awareness brings madness. Madness brings the end of reason, of civilization.

Donna understood that much and agreed with it.

She alone remembered Infinity, as it once was. She remembered each of the worlds that comprised it. Scientists called it the multiverse. Parallel universes, segregated from one another. Nearly identical Earths, except when they weren't. Most of them were impossible to reach, many of them untamed. Untamed, dangerous worlds that neither she nor anyone else ever had any business visiting. Not that this had stopped her, of course...

She knows she should talk about this with Mother or Diana or Dick or anyone, really. But she won't. She won't because none of them remember Infinity, as it once was. None of them remember these parallel Donnas, segregated from one another. These nearly identical Donnas, except when they weren't. An infinite number of Donnas, all of them now long dead.

These Donnas, all of whom are ghosts in possession of her mind.

She won't talk to anyone about this because none of them would mourn.

She returns to New Chronus whenever she finds herself in need of a new beginning. She starts by asking the question she's asked herself everyday for the last four hundred and thirty six. Who is Donna Troy? Confused. Unique. Alone. No comfort at all there.

Perhaps it's time for a new question. Who was Donna Troy? A woman with an infinite set of experiences, gained from an infinite number of parallel lives lived under an infinite set of life circumstances.

Donna Troy knows that there is no air in a vacuum, yet she feels the breeze. No sound, but she hears the wind howl. Just a few of the many incongruities of her life on Day 9,168, the rest of her life.

Another day where nothings makes sense.

She closes her eyes. And remembers Infinity, as it once was.

This is Day One of the past.