*~Disclaimer~*

Uuuummmmmmmm…….we own nothing. We're worth nothing. Don't sue. You'll get (Drum Roll) NOTHING. (We own Alys & Adell. We don't even own Rain. The guys own themselves. Aren't we pathetic folks?) [LoL]



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Shannon sat one morning at the Hardy mansion, err, house, err, place. He lived there with his great leader Matt Hardy (Version 1), his leader's rather unique brother, Jeff, and their girlfriends, a rather idiotic blonde, Adell, and a very dysfunctional Rain. And of course, Shannon's own love, the disturbed, terrorist-minded, Alys.

Everyday, Shannon would pick a new topic to learn about (since he was so young) and use in his everyday life. He was thinking about the noises that came from Matt and Adell's room. He sat on the ground pondering. Maybe Matt was in a band, and practiced a musical instrument? Nah, why so late at night? Or maybe, he had a radio. Deciding it was too much for his boyish blonde brain, he decided on asking Matt.

He stood and crawled over to Matt who was sitting in an armchair, staring at a mirror, practicing his clever grin and V1 signs. Shannon gently tapped his shoulder. He turned and looked at the young one.

"Yes, oh MF'er?" Spoke his greatness. (cough-cough)

"Ummm…can I ask you a question?" Asked Shannon timidly.

"Sure."

"What are those noises coming from your room?" He asked.

"Whoa!" Matt was startled and sat up fast. He began digging in the chair.

"Where's that book at?" He dug more.

"Ah! Here we go."

Matt held out a thick, red, hardback book that read: Anatomy and You! Shannon tilted his head, confused. Matt flipped the book to a page and pulled the book around so Shannon could see.

"This here is the -uh female- thingy…" Matt said.

Shannon's mouth was agape. He looked at the thing. His young eyes traveled to a map of the Middle East, and he saw a connection.

"Is that a state or a country?" Shannon asked.

"What?!"

Matt almost laughed but had a loophole out of telling him the truth.

"Yes, yes Shannon. See, right there." Matt pointed to the country Macedonia.

"Ohh…" Shannon didn't have a clue, "but what about those noises?" He asked.

"Crud, I thought you forgot. Well…uhh…" He scratched the top of his head, " Go ask Adell, she was there.

Shannon nodded and went to find Adell, who was staring at the WWE magazine. Shannon tugged he sleeve.

"Yep." She said.

"What are those noises coming from your and Matt's room?" He asked.

Adell raised her eyebrow, startled. She reached beside her chair and fished out a book: Anatomy and You!

"Well- uh" She began showing him the male part. Shannon tilted his head.

"Oh, another country."

"What?!" She asked.

He turned back a page and pointed to the female part.

"Ma-kin-dodo-a." Shannon struggled to pronounce it. Adell laughed.

"Yeah but this one's called Italy." She said.

Shannon nodded.

"But what were those noises?" He asked.

"I have to go away now." She said jumping up.

This made Shannon run on. Still, he had no clue. He decided to talk to Jeff. He went over to the multi-colored Hardy, who was painting his nails black.

"Jeff?" He asked.

"Yep," he answered, not looking up from his work.

"What were those noises coming from matt and adell's room?…Come to think of it, I've heard it come from your room too!" He exclaimed.

Jeff's head snapped up and a sly smile etched its way onto his face. He pulled out a book: Anatomy and You! He flipped to the page of intercourse.

"Italy and Ma-kin-dodo-a join?" Shannon queried.

Jeff gave him a weird look.

"Uhh…yeah…" Jeff trailed off. He paused.

"Go away!" Jeff hissed and Shannon trotted away. He found Rain, who was watching T.V.

"Rain, what-" He began.

"-are those noises coming from our rooms?"

"Yeah."

"Here you go." She handed him: Anatomy and You!

"Go ask Shane." She turned back to the T.V.

Shannon found Shane in his room.

"Tell me about Italy and Ma-kin-dodo-a." Shannon said.

Shane pulled out the (rather infamous, irritating): Anatomy and You! book. Shannon silently wondered how many copies of that book they had! Shane cleared his throat and put on his reading glasses. He went into a long explanation on Macedonia and Italy, and how they joined. After 30 minutes, he finished and Shannon sat, baffled by his new info.

"Whoaoa…"

"Didn't you know about this?" Shane asked.

"Nope."

"Weeeellll, now you do!" He winked.

"Go ahead and do what you gotta do, tiger."

"Okey-Dokey." He said skipping off to Alys' room. (The poor soul)

-30 Minutes Later-

Shannon comes screaming and crying into Shane's room. He's beaten and bloody, and he has his hand where his "Italy" should be. Shane jumped up.

"What happened?!" He asked.

"Weeel…I-I asked Alys about joining Ma-kin-dodo-a and Italy and she got real mad and removed my Italy!" Shannon cried out.

"How!?" Shane was horrified.

"With the T.V. remote! And it Wasn't even sharp!"

"Ouch…" Shane said.

Shannon continued to cry, jumping around in pain. Suddenly, Shane got an (Hallelujah chorus plays) idea.

-The Next Day-

Shannon comes home from his overnight surgery. Shane crosses his arms, proud of himself.

"How'd it go?" Asked Shane.

Shannon nodded and sat on the couch.

"Good! Cuz I knew it was a good idea and-" He said.

But a mortified Shannon interrupted by jamming a small, blue box in his hand.

"What's this?"

"Just-look-at-it."

Shane did so and was stunned to see a box of tampons.

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*~Authors' note~*

Should we continue? Do you like it, hate it or us? Please R&R! BTW, Flames WILL be used to fuel our campfire to toast marsh mellows and weenies! (Oooh, sorry bout that Shannon!)

Pleaz lock them away,

Alys & Adell