Daria: The College Years
Episode 1: Surprise, Surprise
By: Farren O'Blivion
The alarm buzzer went off promptly at eleven o'clock. Daria Morgendorffer didn't look up from her book as she reached to turn it off. She had been wide-awake now for hours, shockingly, too excited to sleep in. Today was Moving Day, the day she left Lawndale behind for good, or at least until Thanksgiving.
Daria glanced at the page number of her book before closing it. She stretched, cracked her knuckles, then swung her jean-clad legs over the edge of her bed and stood up. She looked around her room. Before, it had looked somewhat lived-in, given the ergodic items littering the floor, but now, despite the furniture and TVs, Daria's room just looked... bare.
Daria smirked. And soon, this room will also be devoid of life. Not that it wasn't to begin with. She stooped to unzip a small duffel bag at her feet and shoved the book in. I guess it's time to go, she thought, unplugging her alarm clock and tossing it in with the book. I don't want to be late. Or early... Whatever.
Daria re-zipped her duffel, slung the strap over her shoulder, and walked out the door without looking back. She went down to the kitchen to leave a note for her parents when it happened. Daria Morgendorffer, age eighteen, had a heart-attack. Or at least she thought she did, until she realized a muffled buzz accompanied the strong vibration over her left breast. She sighed irritably as she dug in her pocket for the new cellphone her parents had given her as a farewell present. She pushed the green button.
"Hello?"
"Daria!" Helen Morgendorffer's voiced was laced with worry. "Where are you?"
"Why, in a land called Honalee," Daria snipped in her characteristic monotone. "Why do you ask?"
"Daria."
"I'm still at the house."
"Oh, good! Stay right there, I'm on my way now!" Helen disconnected.
"Mom? ... Mom?" Daria sighed again, then pushed the red button. What was going on? She had said her heartfelt goodbyes to her family the night before. They had places to go, people to sue, things to buy, and far more important things to do after all. It was understood that Daria was to stay her last night in Lawndale at home, but in the morning she would make her way to the Lane's where Jane, Trent, and possibly Jesse Moreno were waiting to take Daria to Boston. Why was her mother putting a crutch in her plans to leave?
The front door opened and a male voice called to her. "Daria! Hey, Kiddo, where are you?"
Daria frowned. Now her father was delaying her, too?
"What's wrong, Dad?" Daria queried, appearing in the living room. "Did Quinn run off and get married to one of the J's? Or all three of them at once?"
"WHAT?!" Jake Morgendorffer yelled, gripping his chest and reeling backward.
"Just kidding, Dad. Quinn would never marry one of the J's," Daria was quick to assure her father. "None of them can afford her maintenance."
"Thank God!" Jake expressed in his highly excitable voice. "Hey, Kiddo, we're here to take you to Jane's for your surprise!"
"What?" Daria asked, completely mystified. "What surprise? Jane's house?"
"Oh, just something your mother and I thought up!" Jake sidestepped answering. "But Quinn helped pick it out! C'mon!"
"Quinn picked...?" This can't be good.
Daria, Jake and Helen pulled up to a two-story off-white house with a rather large, um, sculpture in the front yard. A beaten-nearly-dead, faded black, and bestickered van, dubbed "The Tank," was parked at the curb. Two young men lounged in the yard close by. Daria recognized them as the bassist and drummer for Mystik Spiral, Trent's band. They waved to her as she stepped out of her parents' car.
"Hey, Daria. Congrats on graduating." Nick Campbell called.
"Thanks, Nick."
"Hey, Trent! Daria's here!" Max Tyler shouted at the van. The side door slid open (Sans plume of smoke, Daria thought) and out jumped Trent Lane and Jesse Moreno, lead singer and rhythm guitarist for the Spiral, respectively. Trent smiled.
"Hey, Daria," he drawled as Jesse collapsed on the grass next to Nick. "Janey's inside. She and your sister are really pleased with themselves. I think you'll like it, too..." he trailed off.
"Trent, my man!" Jake trilled, walking up to Trent and pumping his hand. Daria saw him lean close and whisper something to the young men. They all smiled and nodded, shooting furtive glances at Daria as they did so. Daria turned to Helen.
"Mom? What's going on?"
Helen glanced at the Lane's front door expectantly. "Nothing much, dear, just a little going away--" she was cut off by the door bursting open and Jane sprinting out toward them.
"Daria! About time! You were supposed to be here hours ago!" Jane said, coming to a halt at Helen's side.
Daria frowned, irritated now at all the secrecy and the conspiracy her parents seemed to be involved in with her only friends. "I was supposed to be here anywhere between eleven and one. It's not even eleven thirty yet."
"Really? Well, I guess I'm just so gosh-darned excited that the time has passed more quickly for me."
"Excited about--"
"Where's Quinn?" Helen asked of Jane.
The girl rolled her eyes skyward. "She just couldn't resist."
"Oh, dear," Helen fretted with a worried glance at the boys. Jane smirked.
"Can we do it now, Helen?" Jake called from in front of the Lane garage. Trent stood beside him. Daria turned to them instead.
"Do what now, exactly?" Their only answers were slow, infuriating grins. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Jane signal to the rest of the band; they began to shuffle sideways, shoulder-to-shoulder, up the driveway, their hands behind their backs. Daria didn't believe their innocent smiles for a minute.
Jane began pushing Daria toward the garage. A car door opened then slammed, and Helen rushed by with something cradled to her chest. She stopped beside her husband and exchanged satisfied smiles. As Daria got closer she saw that her mother was holding a camera.
"What the--" she resisted Jane's push.
"Now, boys!" Jane crowed from behind her. Trent and Jake seized the garage door and pulled. It rumbled upward and through the cloud of multicolored confetti the band threw into her face and despite the flashes of Helen's camera, also in her face, Daria saw Quinn perched like a model on the hood of a relatively new Ford.
Her jaw dropped, her eyes bulged, her mind told her that she'd need to destroy the pictures later, but for now all she could do was blink rapidly in shock. Quinn slid gracefully off the Ford's hood and skipped up to her sister with a broad smile. "Well? Do you like it?" Daria was speechless. "Ooh! I knew you would!" Quinn squealed, clapping her hands gleefully. "It's a two-thousand Ford Focus 1.6 LX. It's a Hatchback, but still cool. I picked it out and Jane did all the decal! Did you notice?" Without waiting for an answer Quinn seized Daria's elbow and pulled her into the garage for a closer look.
Daria's slack-jawed expression morphed into a wide grin. The car was an all-over forest green, inspired by her ever-present jacket, no doubt. And the decalcomania was... spectacular. Daria looked to Jane and the two exchanged smirks. "Do you like it?"
"Mere words cannot convey the awe in which I find myself standing..." Daria gestured at the car's side where the phrase 'I refuse to battle wits with an unarmed person' was spelt out in an endless stream of barbed wire. "Jane Lane, you've outdone yourself. How did you manage...?"
Jane shrugged. "I know some guys that would do anything, or get anything, for that matter, for properly cooked bacon."
"Aw, Janey," Trent voiced. "That makes me feel cheap."
"Considering just how much bacon there was, you shouldn't."
"You got bacon?!" Nick and Max exclaimed.
Trent gave them a startled look. "Um..."
"You didn't share?" Jane demanded, her eyes narrowing.
"I shared with Jesse!" Trent defended himself. Nick and Max rounded on Jesse.
"Congratulations, Daria!" Helen declared, drawing the attention back to the reason for their being gathered.
"Yeah!" Jake chimed in. "Way to go, Kiddo!"
"Happy Birthday, Daria," Jesse proclaimed in his deep, slow voice. His band mates gave him an odd look. "What?"
"It's not her birthday, Numbskull!" Max snapped.
"We're her for her going-away party, man," Nick explained.
"Thanks, Jesse," Daria cut in, coming to the slow-witted guitarists defense. "But how did you know that I'd just had my birthday?" Nick and Max swallowed their words as Jesse shrugged, thought about it, then pointed at Trent. "Oh."
"You thought we'd forgotten, didn't you, Kiddo?" Jake laughed.
Daria turned to her parents instead. "Well... it's been a couple weeks and nobody said anything..."
"Oh, honey! We were just busy getting this set up for you!" Helen exclaimed, wrapping her eldest, stiff-backed, daughter in her arms. "We could never just forget your eighteenth birthday!"
"It was sooo much trouble, getting this car for you, Daria," Quinn complained. "Like, I had to ask Ted; you remember Ted, right?; anyway I had to ask him to find the car over the internet and then Mom, Dad and I went to pick it up. We had to drive all the way to Pennsylvania! And then we couldn't find a painter thingy for Jane to use!"
"So here we are, a week late, but no less caring," Helen butted in. She searched her daughter's face. "Do you really like it?"
She couldn't stop herself, she just couldn't... Daria beamed. "I love it. Thank you very much. Thank you all so much."
"So, Daria," Jane said in a game-show host's voice. "You've just won a pretty much brand new car! What are you going to do now?"
"I'm going to Pizza King."
Jake and Helen had already taken care of the insurance issue regarding Daria's new car. The full-coverage policy was in her name, just like the Focus' title. Jake would pay the insurance for her first year of college, but after that, Daria would need to find her own way to pay for it. But, until then, Daria was set.
Daria and her parents again exchanged their 'goodbyes' and 'good luck for the futures' out on the Lane's front lawn. Jake and Helen left after making Daria swear to be careful on the way to Boston. Quinn had asked if she could tag along to Pizza King. Seeing as how Quinn had helped so much in acquiring the Focus, Daria agreed, albeit a bit reluctantly.
Mystik Spiral led the way with Daria in her Focus following behind. Daria looked over at Quinn, frowning ever-so-slightly. Jane was riding with the band for some reason and Daria suspected that reason was Quinn.
The redhead looked back at her and smiled ever-so-slightly. "Yeah, I asked Jane to ride with them but no, it wasn't just so I'd get to ride in your new car." Daria raised a brow. Quinn sighed. "I wanted to talk to you." Daria raised her other brow. Quinn noticed. "Really."
"So? Talk."
The younger girl blew out a breath and fidgeted in her seat. "Well..." Daria waited, scathing remarks at the ready. "Well, you've been in my life my entire life and you're leaving for college, today, and I just... It's going to be weird not having you around. I mean, we've never really talked or anything but, you know, I knew you were there and... I mean, you know...?"
Daria gave her little sister a calculating look. Quinn kept her gaze on her manicured nails and waited... "Yeah, I know what you mean, Quinn," Daria assured. "Truth be told, because you have been around so long, us being apart will be weird for me, too."
Quinn looked at her with wide eyes. "Really?" Daria nodded. They drove in silence for a few moments before Quinn finally muttered, "I think I'll miss you, Daria." She blushed as Daria's eyes swung to her in shock but, nevertheless, she continued somewhat defiantly, "We are sisters, after all."
