You're sick of it, you're sick of everything. You hate how his voice with that stupid lisp can so easily shock you into silence. But in truth you're scared, you're scared that you're going to get hurt again. The last one you fell for didn't even care, always to mixed up with that self-proclaimed cool kid. She turned you down even before you could tell her how you felt. But you know that he was also hurt, but you're still scared. Why did you fall again even after you swore to yourself that you never would?
But sadly for you he has already found another… And you don't want to ruin it for him… You would rather have him be happy and be suffering in silence. Hah suffering like the Sufferer, guess it's in the horrible candy red slime running through your veins. You are after all a mutant not even on the hemospectrum why would he want you anyways? She's a seadweller, a fuchsia blood no less!
No you could never compete with that, you couldn't even compete with a lowly rust blood, just because you are simply not on the hemospectrum. He is so what would he want with you? Many nights you don't sleep trying to come up with reasons why he should even look at you, but you never can. Your just a mutant not supposed to fall or be fallen for, it is simply a fact you wish you could ignore.
What would anyone want with your disgusting mutant candy red blood? Nothing because you shouldn't even be alive. But why does he still talk to you even if it feels you feel so broken? Why does he even bother? Doesn't he have her? They always look so happy together so why does he even pay attention to you?
Your nothing, trash, waist of space, unlovable, you're always rude and let your anger get the best of you. Yet he's always there, no matter what you do he's still there, even when he has to leave her to make sure that you are still here. To make sure that you are still alive. Even though you barely are, your clothes are baggy but hide your thinning body well. You rarely sleep and don't care for eating, you're just wasting away.
He's been looking for you but you hide. You don't deserve his attention, he has her. But why does he keep leaving her to find you? You are hiding in your respite block avoiding everyone yet he keeps coming and knocking on the door. He pleads for you to come out, yet you don't know if you should. Gathering up all of your courage you throw on your shoes and slowly open your door, you don't know how long it's been since you've seen the outside of your room.
You look around and see him standing there eyes wide he stares at you, his mouth wide open. You wave slightly and he runs at you hugging you tightly to him, you can feel your face heat up. He's crying holding you close, you look around she isn't here. You ask where she is and he laughs softly, they were never together he says with that lisp of his. You stare at him then look down at the ground; you don't realize you are shaking till he asks you what's wrong.
You shake your head looking at him again, tears falling down your face. He frowns and wipes them away; he asks why you are crying. You say that you don't know, he pulls you close again and holds you tightly. You close your eyes and hug back and you notice that you're so much smaller than him. He asks you if you are hungry and you shake your head, you don't think your body can handle anything after so long. He frowns and begs you to try, you nod slightly giving in.
He wraps one of his thin but surprisingly strong arms around you and led you to the nutrition block, you noticed a few others who looked at you in shock but was then scared off by his psionics. You sat on a chair as he went through everything trying to find something that you wanted to eat, you didn't want anything though. He didn't give up, he tried till he found the honey. He then proceeded to beg you to at least eat one spoonful of honey. After a little while you caved and agreed, he smiled happily and scooped out a big spoonful of honey and held it in front of your lips. Timidly you ate it and much to your surprise you didn't feel like throwing it up almost immediately afterwards.
In fact it was so good you actually managed to eat half of the small jar before you were done. He smiled happily and put it away hugging you tightly. He's crying again begging you softly to never again leave him. You don't know what to say so you wrap your weak arms around him and cry with him. You froze staring at him wide eyed as he pulls away and kisses you, he's warm and tastes like the honey you had managed to hold down surprisingly well.
You timidly kiss back wrapping your arms around his neck, he pulls away and smiles happily his lisp inducing fangs poking into his bottom lip. You smile back even though the smile you manage is barely there, it's then you heard the three words you would have never hoped to hear come from his mouth. "Love you KK." Your name is Karkat Vantas and you could die right now and never be happier.
