"Hear ye! Hear Ye!"
'That's going right in someone's face,' I thought as Seth Rollins walked in with a cake in his hands. He was flanked by Tyler Breeze and Kevin Owens.
Big E, Kofi and Xavier (or as I referred to him, Austin) were filming for a new episode of Up Up Down Down. I was sitting off to the side out of the view of the camera making fire balls out of tulle for my nephew's Natsu cosplay.
I was a seamstress for the WWE, which was how I met Austin, who I had been with for the better part of two years now.
I set down the tulle in order to watch the madness unfold. Cake and WWE just didn't mix, not unless it was with someone's face. While I loved Austin to pieces. I also enjoyed watching him supper.
He turned around to face the three stooges, one of whom I was sure only came along, because he wanted cake. "Oh! What is this?"
"I am here to present to you, Mr. Xavier Woods, a cake as the madden champion of the world to you! One year Up Up Down Down!"
"Sure didn't miss that while you were out," I teased. Rollins was porbably just as proud of being madden champ as he was being the WWE champ.
There was no bite there though. Rollins was easy to get along with, and he was playing his part well, drawing out the process.
I couldn't help, but smile at the scene. Kofi and E had paused their game to watch the presentation of the cake.
Ignoring what I knew was sure to happen, it was a pretty sweet moment. Even though the channel wasn't the biggest thing Austin had going for him right now, it was something that he really cared about and enjoyed, and I was happy that it was going so well. One year isn't a very long time, except in entertainment. People are fickle and to grow and hold an audience for any length of time is impressive. I was excited to see where else the channel was going to go.
I was also damn sure that cake was going into Austin's face, especially with the way Seth was holding it, and his refusal really to hand it over, when Austin reach for it.
"Happy birthday. It started with an idea. Now it has grown bigger than all of us could've ever dreamed," Seth said.
'Kofi's gonna get caught is he doesn't move.' I thought. I tried not to make it obvious, but I had angled myself away from Austin.
"From all of us here are WWE, keep it tight."
Boom cake to the face.
"I saw that coming," I said, laughing at Austin's misfortune.
"I thought it was gonna happen, but I wasn't sure," he said.
His face was covered in white frosting with a hint of green from the boarders and the pink from the message written on top.
Austin looked up at Seth, who tried to run, but it was too little too late. Austing threrw the cake nailing Seth right in the back. It was a pretty impressive throw really. The cake flew perpendicular to the ground. The entire surface of the top connected with the near entirety of Seth's back.
Seth being a drama king fell to the floor screaming no as if he was in some movie and had just found his lover dead on the floor.
"I knew I should've left the room!" Seth bellowed as Austin offered him some cake that he scooped up. I rolled my eyes and got up walking over to my boyfriend.
"You kind of look like the Joker," I said, dragging my finger through the pink icing from the corner of his lip upward and repeating the motion on the other side.
"Does that make you my Harley Quinn?" he asked.
I knew I had messed up and brought it upon myself. My inner fangirl, not missing the opportunity to reference one of my favorite comic book villains, made me the next target.
I didn't like the tone in his voice. "I'll be your Harleen Quinzel," I said. No face paint/white skin meant no icing.
"I think I might like Harley better," Austin said, an evil glint in his eye.
"Don't even think about it," I warned him, backing away.
"Why so serious?" he asked stalking forward.
"You're a terrible Heath Ledger and EEEEEEEKKKKK!"
Unfortunately for me, he was faster, and before I could take off, his arms were around me, pulling me closer.
I tried to push him away, but I there wasn't any real fight in it. I was too busy squealing and then laughing as he rubbed his face against mine, smearing icing all over me.
He pulled back, not yet letting go and laughed at his work.
I rolled my eyes.
"Harley," Austin crowed in a terrible attempt at the Mark Hamill Joker.
"Yes, Mistah J?" I asked, putting on my best Harley voice.
I may or may not have been a bit of a Harley Quinn fangirl, and by may I mean totally and little bit, I mean I had been cosplaying as her in her various incarnations for years and had an entire Harley Quinn themed sleeve tattooed on my arm.
"You seem to have something on your face," he said. His tapped his finger to my lip undoubtedly leaving more icing where he had touched.
"Oh really, Puddin? Ya think ya could get it for me?"
"Why of course," he responded pressing his lips to mine.
"Inappropriate!" Big E yelled. "Children watch this channel!"
That of course only spurred me on, causing me to deepen the kiss, a motion that Austin happily reciprocated, leading to more protests from E and the others to all "Oh!" "Woo!" and whistle.
We broke apart and I smirked at E over Austin's shoulder, licking the icing off of my lips.
"Y'all nasty. Think of the children!" E yelled.
"Well maybe the children shouldn't be on the internet without adult supervision," I said, still in my Harley Quinn voice. "Ain't that right, Puddin'?"
"I can't take you seriously with that voice," he said, laughing.
"Your Hamill Joker sucks too," I told him.
"You are so good at that. It's scary," Seth said.
"I've had a lot of practice."
"Yes. And you can catch her at a bunch of cons which she announces on twitter which I can't remember we'll list it below or something. Go follow everyone else I'm Austin Creed xavierwoodphd and Remember to keep it tight."
"Pray for the children!" E yelled in the background.
