Disclaimer: I own my OCs and don't own Hetalia. Boo.

Amelia slapped her nail-studded baseball bat against her palm with a soft but audible thwack, uncaring as to the bent shards of metal that dug into her hand as she did so. Eyes narrowed, she levelled a playful glare at the pale, innocuous-looking girl sitting beside her, hands clasped and eyes downcast.

"You ready to show those fuckers some fun?" Amelia asked, throwing a tanned arm around the other girl's shoulders. The gesture, at first glance friendly and innocuous, turned menacing, her hand tightening into the soft material of the shorter girl's sleeve. In response, she tucked an errant tendril of wavy hair that had escaped from one of its tails before shoving Amelia off of her seat, her face never losing its empty mien.

Grumbling, Amelia stood up and brushed away imaginary dirt from the cuffs of her inordinately short cut-offs. "Damn it bitch, what the fuck was that for?" She snapped. Her angry blustering faded as she stared into the other girl's eyes, clear and tranquil as pond water and just as colourless, now reflecting a pale, sickly yellow from the dim light of the bulb swinging overhead. Amelia found herself grinning and jostling the girl in a once again playful manner. "C'mon, it's not so bad, Nadie! Think about it: You get to pave the way for us. It's pretty epic, you gotta admit."

Nadie merely reached up to fiddle with one of the flower-adorned ties holding her long hair back. "Wonderful," she said flatly, plucking one of the petals off as she spoke. It drifted to the ground, small and white, only to be ground beneath the heel of her shoe. Pollen and a cloying perfume breathed into the air, irritating the insides of Amelia's nose, though Nadia herself didn't mind. "Why can't Madison do this, again? Or Basilio? Or you, for that matter?" She questioned.

Amelia folded her arms behind her head, staring up at the water marked ceiling of her living room. "We ain't subtle enough for this espionage shit, you know that. Maddie'll just run in there and start chucking curling stones at everyone's heads, Basilio'll try some weird-ass kulam shit and well, you know me. I'd just tell everyone to sit back, shut the hell up and wait for me to put a bullet between their eyes." She shook her head, short auburn curls bouncing against her shoulders.

"Nope," Amelia said seriously, "we need someone patient. Someone who'll lull them into a false sense of security, make themselves out to be a perfect little princess before she cuts all of them open from cock to chops. And you," she added, tucking a lock of blue-black hair behind Nadie's ear, "are the perfect little manipulator, dirty faker you are."

"She's right you know," Madison agreed, stepping out of the shadows and into the room. Her bright blonde curls drifted behind her as she walked, as though stirred by a non-existent wind. "In order for this to succeed, we need someone who's like water. Water is passive, taking on the colour of its surroundings. We want someone who will blend in, someone who they know next to nothing about, who can make them trust and let their guards down. Then, you can rise up and drown them out."

"How poetic." She would have sighed at the twin glowers that she received, but she lacked the ability to be swayed by threats, and opted instead to favour the sisters with one of her characteristic flat responses. "I understand. Infiltrate their universe, fool them into believing that I am of no threat, slip in a few subtle murders in order to create a sense of chaos and distrust amongst them, then re-open the gate so as to allow the rest of us in," Nadie droned.

Amelia rolled her eyes. "God, do you always have to sound like a fucking robot? How're you gonna blend in with those assholes when you talk like you were taught English by a battery-powered version of Alfred Pennyworth?!"

A third voice cut through the silence. "I for one think she speaks perfectly normally. Just because you butcher the English language beyond recognition doesn't mean that the rest of us can't speak like proper ladies," Alice sniffed, smoothing out the creases in her starched white apron.

Ire raised, Amelia jumped up from her chair, baseball bat swinging around in a wide arc, the bent nails missing the English woman's face by centimetres. "You wanna run that around by me again, Miss Itty Bitty Titties?!" She snarled.

Alice, unmoved by her aggressive posturing, merely stuck her nose up in the air, looking the epitome of hauteur as she did so, as if Amelia were a commoner whom gotten blood on her carriage and who had the gall to complain that she'd been trampled. "Better to be a member of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee than a member of the Smug Tub Jugs Club," she said with a toss of her head.

Amelia snorted. "That's rich, coming from the girl wearing a push-up bra." Smirking widely, she stuck out her own chest, which was barely constrained by her knotted midriff top. She gestured towards Madison and Nadia with the hand not clutching the handle of her bat. "Three awesome racks versus your invisitits; don't worry, I'll get you padded inserts and some new self-esteem." Before she could continue with her taunting, Amelia was cut off by the air in front of her rippling like the disturbed surface of a lake just before it rent apart with a soundless screech, ripping open a massive gap that quivered at the edges with a sibilant noise like the spitting hiss of static.

Nadie carefully rose from her seat before grabbing the handle of her black-and-lavender carryon and wheeling it over towards the portal. "It seems that my transport is here."

"No shit Sherlock," Amelia cracked, only to receive a wallop to the back of her head from Alice's broom, who waved her finger in a disapproving manner as though Amelia were an intransigent child

"Language dear," she said silkily, aqua eyes glinting through the fringe hanging in front of them. Amelia scowled and stuck up both of her middle fingers but said nothing.

"Don't forget to kick my goody-goody male self in his dick!" She shouted to Nadie, who ignored her just before stepping through the portal. It closed with a grating clang, like a rusted gate swinging shut, the gasping chasm hanging in the air gradually shrinking in size until it disappeared entirely with a faint pop.

Amelia blew a strand of hair out of her face before voicing the opinion held by the other women in the room. "Those sanctimonious little shit-lickers are so fucked."

As Madison and Alice nodded in agreement, Basilio scurried in, only to catch the toe of his shoe on the carpet and fall flat on his face. "Did my sister leave already?" He asked when he'd pulled himself to his feet.

Alice patted him on the head when she saw his downcast expression. "I'm terribly sorry dear, but Nadie's long gone," she said gently.

"Yeah, you just missed her, Filipino lady-boy," Amelia smirked.

Basilio threw her a dirty look. "When I get free from you-

"Is the day I grow a dick," Amelia interrupted.

"You mean you don't have one already?" Madison said dryly.

Amelia raised her fist up at her younger twin. "Why you little cocks-

Basilio dropped his head into his hands. "Why couldn't I have gone with Nadie?" He mumbled into his palms as the Amelia and Madison began to scream all manner of profanities at one another and Alice attempted to separate the quarrelling sisters by whacking at the two of them with her broom whilst threatening to ground them.

A/N: OCs and 2P!genderbends are proving to be quite entertaining.