Karin sucks.
Yes, that's right- I went there.
Oh no you didn't!
Snap fingers and silly little head bop thing.
Oh yes, I did.
We all agree and you know it. You'd be hard pressed to find any one person who'd argue that she's a somewhat salvageable- or even mildly likable- character.
She's a failed attempt at balance. Kishimoto Masashi needed a way to balance out Sasuke's new four person cell (what is he calling it now? Team Falcor? My Chemical Romance Rejects? Team Super Cool? No matter, we shall henceforth refer to it as Team Ramrod) but seeing as Sasuke himself fails at life so bad the only real way to balance it all out was to create a Mary Sue who fails at life with as much talent and flair as her counterpart.
Wow- that's a thought that'll make you piss the bed.
It seemed things were finally getting back on track in Naruto and for a while we all thought we could rest easy and thank Kishimoto Masashi for finally killing off that crusty net pedo Orochimaru (if you're currently wondering why XxHaWtgOtHChikxX stopped responding to your IMs, you can rest assured it's because she was not- in fact- a cute little black haired sophomore with emotional issues and a propensity for ripping the eyeballs out of her teddy bears and mailing them to her ex boy friend who "sucked out her soul and sold it to a hobo for cigarette money" well, it's because it was actually Orochimaru. Yes, that's right. Him. There's an oh no second for you.) when, enter: Succubus- wow, that's actually a fantastic play on words.
She just sucks. Naruto as a whole would be better off had she never set foot on its pages and fans around the world would rejoice should her character happen to have- what we will call for the sake of niceties and to avoid any indemnity on the author's part- "an accident".
That's where I come in.
I've been listening to that snivling, snot nosed little demon fox prat piss and moan about his missing gay fetish for I-don't-know-how-many years (one loses track of these things when spending all of his time surfing for porn and avoiding aggro in the Valkrum Dunes) and I've had enough. Now, not only is he off molesting frogs when he should be killing said gay fetish and ridding the world of his eternal gloom, but the pages of this manga are perpetually plagued by her off damper attempts at finding romance with the inconsolable emo loser that is Uchiha Sasuke.
Oh yes, and then the infinite hotness that is Uchiha Itachi dies (-no, I'm not gay. I'm just comfortable enough in my masculinity to be able to admit when another man is infinitely hot-) and, while I don't exactly think this had anything to do with Karin it helps my "Karin Sucks" campaign to just blame the whole mess on her and be done with it.
Fangirls of the world, unite: your red-eyed god was murdered by that bloodletting Succubus.
So now Naruto's molesting frogs, Sakura's lucky to get a cameo in these days, Itachi's dead, and XxHaWtgOtHChikxX won't respond to my IMs.
Time for response. I'm sick and bloody tired of the way this manga is being written and for the sake of the millions of readers who've loyally followed it since the first chapter hit the press, I'm making some changes. Things are going to be different from here on in. The living will be reminded they're all acting like stuttering idiots. The dead will once again rise. Naruto will learn that his time could be much better spent than fondling amphibious creatures. And Karin will know what a thousand years of pain really feels like.
My name is Hatake Kakashi, and this is my story.
This is ttly dedicated to my beta AYA15!! she roxorz my boxorz I luv you Aya SPARKLE RAINBOW!!111
