BioWare owns the Mass Effect universe…unfortunately.
This is my first Fan Fic in about a year. Comments and advice are quite loved. I am not used to creating romantic fics, so this is a bit out of my niche. I would love to make this much better, so any comments will be appreciated.
Set after the events of Mass Effect 2, therefore there will be a significant amount of spoilers. It is my "in between" of ME 2 and what may/may not happen in ME3.
Line breaks or asterisks separate scenes, lets hope they don't disappear.
Dawn Shepard awoke in her quarters dripping with sweat and tears. A young, petite woman of middle twenties, she had seen horrors beyond the most frightening nightmares. Her bright blue eyes no longer held that of joy. She knew pain, loss, and suffering, and her eyes, once a bright blue, were now a dull gray. Her auburn, shoulder length hair looked a mess from her restless sleep. "Another damn nightmare. I can't even get away from him in my sleep!" She screamed as she punched her thin wall. Feelings of complete hopelessness consumed her when she was alone, no matter the facade she kept up when in the presence of others. The one person who could fix her was the one person she never wanted to see again. She was better off without him, or so she thought. After all, she had defeated the Collectors and survived a jump through the Omega 4 Relay, which no one had ever done. She was had been revived from death after saving nearly her entire crew, only to be completely abandoned by those she trusted. She was fooling herself. Heroism would never be enough to fill the hole in her heart left by Kaidan Alenko. As much as Dawn hated to admit it, she missed him, but her crew was the most important thing to her now. Her job was to save humanity from the Reapers, even with minimal support from the Alliance and Council, and Cerberus after her. She knew her risks, and the likelihood of success, but since when did Commander Shepard, Savior of the Citadel, give up? Still, she knew she did, in fact need Kaidan Alenko, no matter what she told everyone else.
Sighing, she ran her fingers over the frame on her desk, the frame that still held his picture after all this time. Her warm memories were too soon interrupted by the voice of her AI.
"Commander, if I may, your emotional outbreaks are getting worse. Should I inform the doctor?" A blue hologram appeared near her mid air. If anyone had told Shepard an AI could have human qualities and develop emotional connections, she would have called them insane and requested they receive mental help. That was before EDI had been unshackled by Joker, saved them all from Collectors, and completely cut her ties to the company that created her in order to help Shepard.
"No thank you, EDI. I just need to vent some frustration." The Commander replied, exhaling deeply, turning to feed her hamster near her bathroom wall. The little rodent always brought a small smile to her face as he peaked from his small home. He had been a present for Joker and Garrus after her less than pleasant conversation on Horizon. In trying times, she was glad that at least a handful of her friends stood by her, backing her with their full support.
"Commander, I have received a signal. A ship has been attempting to track our sensors. It does not appear to be a Cerberus vessel." EDI said as Dawn jumped to her closet and removed a black uniform shirt bearing only an "N7" emblem. She had made a point to burn all of her Cerberus uniforms as soon as she told the Illusive Man to fuck off.
"EDI, instruct Joker to prepare for evasive maneuvers. I want Garrus, Tali, Grunt, Jack, Legion, Thane, Miranda, Jacob, and Samara to meet me in the CIC five minutes ago." She said rushing out the door, hesitating only to grab her smallest pistol. She then secured it to her thigh, and proceeded to her elevator.
As she stepped out the elevator, she was relieved to see both the turian and asari standing near her galaxy map. "We have an unknown ship tracking us. I want to know who they are if they're not Cerberus. Now!" She commanded as they parted. "Kelly, get the intercom running, I need to address the ship." She said to the young woman to her right as she stood near the galaxy map.
"Yes ma'am, already done." The yeoman said as she moved her hand so that the commander had access to the com button. The young redhead was apprehensive as she remembered her abduction by the collectors a week ago.
"This is Commander Shepard. After recent events, we were prepared for Cerberus to come after us. However, this is not the case this time. We have an unnamed vessel coming after us, and we need to be ready for anything. Perhaps this is nothing more than a mistaken lost ship, but I am not prepared to be caught with my pants down, again. Be battle ready until further notice! Shepard out." Shepard quickly closed the com channel, and made her way to the pilot wing. "Talk to me Joker." She said, looking at her longtime friend, a look of concern on her usually fair face.
"Commander, we're being hailed." Joker looked up at her waiting for instruction. Instances like this Shepard wondered why she didn't retire somewhere nice and quiet.
"Patch them trough, Joker" She said sternly, remaining completely composed, despite her internal worry.
"Aye, Aye, ma'am."
"This is Commander Shepard, identify yourself, and your ship." She said sternly into the com link, her uneasy hands gripping the pilot seat as she stood straight.
"Commander Shepard," A familiar voice came through on the com link. Shepard's stomach tightened and her throat instantly become dry. The strong-willed Commander lost her ability to speak upon hearing that voice. "Commander, do you read me?" The voice asked. Shepard cleared her throat. "Yes, I read you. You are traveling in an Alliance vessel by my readings. What are you doing tracking the Normandy-" She paused, taking in a staggered break, "-Alenko." She practically breathed his name, anger ceding into her voice. The link between the ships remained silent for what seemed like eternity before Commander Alenko finally poke up. "Looking for you Commander." Was the faint reply.
Dawn's throat caught. She was expecting a battle, or at the very least a heated confrontation. This was something she could handle, something she could prepare for through years of practice. She was a battle-hardened woman in her late twenties. She had lived, and died, and lived again. There was nothing that scared her, nothing she could not face. Nothing, except Kaidan Alenko. She ran her fingers over her forehead as Joker shook his head, and muted the channel. "Commander, you can't. It's not healthy for you." He said, the look of a concerned friend looking back at her, not that of her flight lieutenant. Shepard cleared her throat, and mustered up what she could. "Commander Alenko, you have permission to come aboard as soon as we land, and we will discuss a future agreement. We are five minutes to Illium, we will discuss this there. Shepard out." Joker slumped into his seat defeated. The woman had to be masochistic for talking to Alenko again after what he did to her.
Shepard quickly stumbled back to the CIC, oblivious to the quizzical looks from her crew. She stood at her galaxy map, pretending to work, but to no advail. "Commander Alenko requests to come aboard Commander Shepard. He appears to be alone." Yeoman Chambers shrugged innocently to her as she tapped away on her terminal. "Should I tell Joker to unlock the airlock?"
"Yes, Kelly. Please tell him to meet me in the debriefing room." Dawn said, hastening her pace toward the room, ignoring the look from her assistant. She paced the room nervously, sweat dripping from her head. The large room felt especially small to her at the moment. As she heard the doors slide open, her stomach tightened once again.
"Shepard?" His voice was low and quiet. "I know I am the last person in the galaxy you want to see, and I can understand why after what I said when we met on Horizon." He said, his face showing no signs of anger.
"What do you want, Kaidan?" She said, unable to hide the hurt and anger from her voice. "Frankly, I don't have anything more to say to you, but since you tracked me half way across the galaxy at the risk of me killing you, I suppose I can listen." She said, a bit forcefully as her biotics flared slightly, causing her entire body to glow a bright blue.
"Shepard, calm down. I have no intention of making an ass of myself again." He said, trying to diffuse the increasingly hostile situation. he had forgotten his, er, this woman had a temper on her. " I have a couple of things to say to you. I hope you will listen." He said, motioning to one of the seats. "May I?" He asked looking to her hopefully, his polite demeanor never changing. It agitated Shepard further, but she would play along, for now. She nodded her head reluctantly, causing her auburn hair to fall lightly over her face. With her permission, he slowly took a seat, watching her carefully, noting her biotic flare disappeared. She was off her guard. This was a good thing. "Shepard, I foremost wanted to apologize. I was out of line on Horizon, and Garrus was right. I wasn't thinking, and I was blinded by emotions. When I saw you alive my heart leaped with joy, but I was so angry with you. I was so in love with you Dawn. And I refused to believe you were gone for so long!" He said looking to her.
"Kaidan, you hurt me! You insulted me, called me a liar, and turned your back on me." She said through angry tears. Her biotics once again flaring. "You tell me you're sorry? Sorry for what? Are you trying to ease your guilty conscience?" She yelled as she lifted a chair and proceeded to throw in into a wall with a short mnemonic. She had developed a stronger temper since their last interaction. A fact that he felt was the cause of his stupidity. He noticed she had put a slight dent in the stone colored wall, though not damaging anything of importance. He hoped to keep it that way.
"Shepard, please!" Kaidan let his voice raise slightly as he put a hand lightly on her arm, unwavering to her anger. "I know I can't take back what I said, but I need to know everything you said was the truth." He said, looking defeated.
Dawn felt as if a lightning bolt shocked her entire body as he touched her, the glow receding slightly. "Kaidan, I have never, and would never lie to you. Why do you thing I am running? Cerberus is after me because I wouldn't work with them. I couldn't do the horrible things they wanted" She said, her voice becoming quieter despite her rising anger.
Kaidan was in complete shock. She was hurt, and she was still telling him the truth. At this point he felt lies were easier to take. At least then he could still blame her. He felt like the lowest point in the galaxy knowing what he know knew. He walked over to her, not caring if she were to hurt him right now, and kissed her passionately.
Dawn felt her body go completely limp at Kaidan's touch, she felt as if she had been stung by a seeker swarm. She knew how much his betrayal hurt her, how angry she was at him, and how much she still loved him. She was completely immobilized by his warm hands against her body. As they parted, she regained composure and her head cleared. "What the hell Kaidan!" She stammered, "How can you just show up here and expect me to forgive you! Do you have any idea what exactly I've been through!" She was afraid, and shoved a barrier between herself and the man standing in front of her.
"I…I'm sorry Shepard. I just…I couldn't…" His words faltered, and he stepped back from her, his dark honey eyes betraying his body yet again. He hadn't expected her to forgive him after his behavior on Horizon, but he had hoped she would. "I'm sorry I wasted your time Commander. I'll be going now. Good luck." He said as he walked out the debriefing door, out of her life for what may very well be forever.
