Endless Desire

InuShikaCho

Disclaimer: I do not own DN Angel… really

"This is my first fan fiction of DN Angel! I hope you'll like it! It might contain OOC… since this is my first fic…"

Note: The Italicized words are Riku's point of view


It was first day of class when I first met him. He was really clumsy and that was one of the things I really hate about him. He was so fragile but he was dedicated to his own goals. We were not that close but we were able to talk to one another. I can still remember when he first approached me and how I treated him the wrong way. I didn't know that we'll end up in our own affections. It was so sudden as if it was like a flash of light entering my life, waking up the next day realizing that I'm already in love with him.

I also knew his hidden affections for my twin sister. He didn't tell me anything about it, but it was too clear for me to see by just looking in his actions whenever he's with my twin. The moment I thought of it, I always end up with a conclusion that he will never feel the same way as I am. It was really impossible, just like what they said, you can't forget the one you truly love even though you give your love to another especially when you know that you're just forcing yourself to do it. If ever, he will love me, I believe that the one, whom he always thinks of, remembers and inside his heart is my twin. It's reality. That's how the way it is. Once you love someone, you'll have a half percent chance that the one you love loves you back. And in my case, it's the opposite way.

But everything started to change when other people stepped into our lives and connected us. Both of us showed our own feelings for one another. He already forgot Risa and now he's falling for his ex's twin. It might just be a trick for him or he was forced to love me. I don't want that kind. I want him to love me not by force but by his own will. I don't want to see him in love with me because of what I have but because of who I am. I know, he's not that person, but still I want to be sure. Because honestly, I don't want to feel the same way as Risa felt when Dark left her. I don't want to feel my heart broken into pieces. I'm scared.

"I really like you, Riku" he told me down those meteor showers we saw that memorable night. And with the kiss he gave, I proved that everything was real and not hallucinations. I felt his sweet kiss swallowed my pride and affection for him. He threw away my sadness and sorrow and proved me that what I concluded was completely false.

"I won't let anything bad happens to you… I'll protect you…" Saving me with his feathers and wings what made me stayed in his arms for that long. I didn't mind other's criticism for us. Loving him was more important to me, without it, I would probably lock up in my old dark side. I could have end up with my false conclusions. I might have been considering to the lies for all of my life.

I didn't even think that I was desperate for his love. My infatuations had blinded me from loving him. So intense that I don't want him to leave me, I'm scared from the fact that no one would love me just like the way he did. He was the only person who loved me that way. I can say that he really completed me. After all of my whole life, searching, I found the one I would really love in my whole life and that's, Daisuke Niwa.

"Riku, let's go…" my twin sister, Risa, told me. It was his funeral that day. It was unexpected death. It was unexpected lose for me. He had an accident a week before our wedding. That made me cried a river and drove me crazy. I thought we were destined forever, but what separated us was destiny itself.

"I'm coming…" I answered with my cold weak voice.

A land filled with tears and sorrows. His grave was filled with red roses. Everything I could feel was coldness, needing his warm embrace. Everything I could see was darkness, needing his white night and true light. Moments of despair filled my soul as his grave was buried to the ground. I wanted to scream out his name. I wanted to see his smiling face again. But how? Now that he totally left me in the ground and flew above.

I saw everyone's worthwhile tears flowing down from their weak eyes. I even heard everyone's mourns repeating inside my head. But me, I wasn't talking at all. My sight was focused in one thing, my hearing was closed from any stories and my responses were disabled. Everyone would feel the same like me. They know how much heart ache I received from the accident.

"Riku, dinner is ready" Risa told me, I heard it, but I didn't respond nor answered her offer. I was looking directly to nowhere. "Riku, please, can't you say anything?!" I heard her loud and clear, but how could I, I'm too weak to answer him. I don't have any strength left to move my body. All of the things inside my body were uncontrollable. The only part that I could control was the flow of my tears.

"Riku, for goodness sake, can you please say something?! I'm begging you! All of us are worried for you. You—"

"Risa… leave her alone for a while, I think she needs some rest…" Satoshi came, dragging Risa slowly outside Riku's room.

Once you've lost someone you really love, it would be impossible for you to move on. For me, it's hard to live without him, without Daisuke. Because I lived life with him, and I don't know how to make things possible again, I don't know how to let my world revolves again without him.

To be with him again is my only wish. So please let me have that desire. I want to be with him forever. I don't want to lose him anymore. I love him. I love you Daisuke! Please, let me be with you! I don't want to live without you, Daisuke…

"Riku?" Risa entered the room, "RIKU! What are you doing?"

"Daisuke…" Riku murmured standing before the balcony near her room, "Daisuke…"

"Riku, what are you doing there?!" Risa shouted, "Riku!"

"Daisuke…" she left her last step in the floor as she stood from the white hurdle in her own terrace, "Goodbye…"

"RIKU!!" Risa shouted running towards her twin. She wanted to stop her from suicide. But when she reached her place, it was too late. Riku already jumped out of the hurdle her body facing the ground with her arms wide open. Tears were streaming down her face as she smiled, "RIKU!!" Risa screamed

"N-No…" Risa's eyes widened as she fell down to her knees "Please no… I don't want… Riku… she… why did… no… don't tell… RIKU!! Why?! RIKU!" she cried unstoppably.

"DAISUKE!" Risa heard Riku's voice from below. She stood up and slowly looked at her twin's body, "R-Riku?"

"Daisuke…" Riku cried down, "Daisuke…"

"Didn't I tell you, I won't let anything bad happen to you…" a light appeared beside Riku, showing that it was Daisuke's spirit.

"What are you doing?!" Riku demanded with tears still flowing down to her cheeks. "Daisuke…"

"You already forgot my promise… I said I will always protect you…" Daisuke's spirit kneeled down as it stared Riku's shaking body.

"I want to be with you… I always wanted to be with you, Daisuke!" Riku cried, "Why did you have to leave me! DAISUKE!" her tears were flowing down as she felt warmth in her entire body.

"Though you don't see me… I'm always here beside you, Riku. I promise you, I'm right by your side …" it said.

The last thing I could remember happening that night was the warmth I felt in my cold body and in my lips. He kissed me a goodbye. Right after, I saw him vanishing in front of me. I wanted to touch his face for the last time, but my hands passed through him. My eyes closed slowly as I heard his voice telling me how much he loves me and a call of my name. End when I opened my eyes, I was already lying inside my room.

For me, it was not a dream. I saw him there, he even embraced me, and his warmth was stuck in my body. I felt his warmth clearly, telling me that it was true. After that day on, I cheered up myself with the help of my twin and my other friends. I moved on from his death, but my love for him didn't vanish. Both of us left an endless desire.

-The END-