A/N: Yeah, don't know what this is to tell you the truth…It kind of just popped into my head, literally… So yeah, it's 1:30 in the morning, I'm loaded up on sugar, hanging with my bestest friend ever, so… ya… sorry for whatever comes from this… Now.. TO THE MAYHEEEEM!!!
'…That day you tossed it to me, and I threw down… I went back to get it… The paopu fruit you teased me with, the day it all happened… I thought by some twist of fate we would be bound together, destinies entwined. Because… deep down, even then, I knew that I loved you. You consumed my thoughts, my actions… my heart… There was a piece of the paopu missing, right at the corner too… Was that your doing, or did it merely just break off? Or… was I making myself see things?
To think, everyday, my first thought and last thoughts were of you… how to get closer and become better. Secretly, I was jealous of Kairi… How you looked at her, and gave her the attention I soooo longed for… How I wished we never met her sometimes… But no, I know you would never love me as I do you… But that night we became separated, I tried so desperately to grab your hand… I knew where you were going, yet I would still follow.
Even then you were my whole world… Your opinion meant everything to me, and it still does… For you are the only thing in my life that matters to me as much as my own.
My actions, my choices, they were all ways to lead me to you, but in the end, it built a wall between us. A wall that I intended to break down, by whatever means necessary. You went to a world, I followed faithfully. But… The first visit to Hollow Bastion changed me. When you told me to go home, I thought I was dying, my heart so much… You looked so disgusted to see me. Did I really repulse you that much? The real reason I didn't leave… I wanted to see if it was true… Then… everything happened, and in truth, when Ansem or Xehanort or whoever he was wanted Kairi's heart, the real reason I didn't give it to them was because I was afraid that they'd leave my heart there, to rot me from the inside out. So, in truth, the real reason I unlocked Kairi's heart and my own was I wanted to escape my pain, and fall into darkness, and stay there for eternity, in the numbing cold of nothingness.
But I was given a second chance, and, with new determination, I thanked whatever God or Goddess had given me more time. My new goal: To find you and let you know… Standing on the other side of that door, I wanted to go with you. I would've gladly given up the keyblade, if it meant having you by my side once more. Then, you said something that still perplexes me to this day. "Take good care of her." Did you mistaken my rivalry with Kairi as a frivolous crush? Did you truly not see me watching you? Or do you feel for Kairi the way you do not feel for me?
Again, though, I faded into a deep sleep. I don't know how long I was there for, yet, after I awoke, my heart felt…. Heavier, as though I carried the regrets and hopes of another… And, again, you consumed my thoughts, but somehow, I could not stop thinking of you.. of your smile.. Of your eyes… And, I knew, I wanted to be with you. But, the nagging thought of you wanting to be with Kairi played in the back of my mind, and a darkness grew in my heart. From that darkness, a new form of myself emerged, yet, I found solace in the wild nature of my malevolent form. It was the only way I could escape the pain of wanting your love. It seemed we went around in circles, and a new thought emerged in my head… You wanted to find me… You wanted me back… I don't know how I knew, but I just did. And I compelled myself onwards, getting stronger for you. And now… it nearly ends… Will my journey lead me to you? Or, will I have to defy destinies wish once more to gain your trust once again…'
