Always Yours
He had no idea that him seeing her on her wedding day would be the last time he would be seeing her alive.
He knew he shouldn't be here, of course. If anyone knew he was here he would be dead before he could even blink. No doubt he could defend himself well and take out large numbers before he was beaten, but he wasn't going to do that. He wasn't here to hurt her and ruin the best day in her life.
As he walked further he sensed the protective enchantments put around to warn them of any danger. But he wasn't bringing any danger with him. He couldn't see anything yet, but he knew she was here. She had loved this place since they were kids. And he knew that she would choose to marry here no matter how fancy place her to be husband in few hours would have wanted. Muttering her name to himself he went ahead.
As soon as he was sure the enchantments weren't going to set off and a large group of people wearing festive robes came in view he cast a disillusion charm on himself he walked farther. The arrangements were simple and perfect just like her. He wished things had been different, and the man she was going to marry would be him. He wished he had chosen a different path, just for her. He wanted a second chance at life, at making decisions. But he knew it was a wasted attempt the moment he thought of it. Nothing he wished for ever was his.
Here and there he recognized familiar faces who hated him with wrath but they didn't see him; everyone was laughing, talking and enjoying the moment. He even saw his enemies; the four of them talking jovially and looking happy. But it was obvious who was the happiest. Feeling bitter he walked away trying to shut his senses and just find her.
There was a huge tent set up around the corner; he knew she was in here. For a moment he wondered if he should be doing this, he knew what her answer was going to be anyway. Then why was he subjecting himself to the pain again? And he should stay away from her if he wanted to heal, but he should see her too, this was the last time she would be his Lily Evans. He could turn away if he wanted to, but he had to see her. There was some force telling him that he should. Feeling a little afraid, he went inside the tent.
There was laughter and happiness here too of course, and women. He went on. Just then he saw her, her sister stood stiffly with an uncomfortable expression and her mother hovered over her as her friends stood there beaming. Once he looked at her he had eyes for no one else. She looked absolutely beautiful. Watching her brought a smile on his face automatically; she was wearing a beautiful white gown emitting a golden glow, her hair held up with slight curls across her glowing cheeks. She was so perfect, and so beautiful. He wished she was hers.
He hadn't realized that the music outside had changed and her friends were moving out, hurriedly he moved to the other side of the room.
"You look beautiful darling," her mother kissed her on her forehead. "I love you," she dabbed her wet cheeks.
"Mom, I love you too," Lily answered. He watched his lip trembling. Her father was waiting by the door looking exuberant, her mother hurried out.
"I can't believe you're getting married sweetheart," he father choked.
"Daddy," she gave him a hug. He wanted to talk, reveal himself but he didn't want to ruin the moment. The music changed again and he saw the bridesmaid walk out slowly.
"Dad, wait for me outside, I'll be out in a moment," she kissed her father's cheek. He headed outside.
Taking a deep breath she looked around, her eyes stopped at where he stood looking confused, it was now or never. He revealed himself. She gasped, she looked around probably for her wand but it wasn't here. There was such extreme fear in her eyes that he hated himself because he knew he had caused it.
"I'm not here to hurt you," he told her.
"What are you doing here then?" she asked looking furious and yet scared.
"Trust me Lily," he whispered.
"Who else is here? How did you get in?" she demanded.
"It's just me…believe me, I'm not here to hurt you." He said in a louder voice.
"I'm not lying," he said. She stared at him, her deep green eyes searching his black ones. He felt like he could stare in them forever.
"Why are you here?" she asked, calmer.
"I-uh…I-wanted to see you," he mumbled.
"Oh…" she just stared waiting for him to speak more.
"I'm sorry that things ended up this way between us, but you're still my best friend Lily, I miss you," he didn't have the courage to look at her. She still didn't reply. Very slowly he looked up, "I miss you too," her eyes were glistening a little. He hadn't expected her to say it back, he had thought she would scorn at him, tell him he was worthless and she hadn't given him much a thought.
"I'm sorry," he mumbled.
She shook her head, "you chose a different path, and I chose mine. I wasn't an eleven year old who didn't know that being a muggle-born meant no difference to some. I know what's right and wrong now, and I chose what felt right to me…I'm sorry that you don't realize that what you have chosen is certainly not something I hold a very good opinion of."
Not wanting to argue whose side was better with her he asked, "Lily…are you sure of this?"
"Sure of what?" she asked looking confused at the change in his tone.
"Marrying him," he said. The hatred in his tone wasn't disguised from Lily. He watched her as blood rose to her cheeks, eyes narrowing, hatred building.
"Honey, it's time." Her father had entered in and looked shocked to see a stranger in her daughter's dressing room.
"Yes, I'm sure." She said suddenly very calm again before her father could comment on his presence. She picked up her bouquet in her left arm and placed her right arm on the crook of her father's elbow.
He watched her feeling desperate, rejection washing over him again. Before walking away she turned toward him with a softer look on her perfect face.
"Are you sure of your path Severus?"
"Goodbye Lily," he told her.
"Goodbye Sev," she said curtly and embraced her chosen path.
He continued watching her as she walked further away from her. She reached the opening of the tent and turned to look at him once.
I love you Lily Evans. He thought to himself, once more he had failed to tell her.
Little did he know that this was the last time he would be seeing her alive and happy, never again would he have a chance to confess his feelings to her; tell her that he'll forever and always remain…only hers.
A/N: Since Snape is my favorite HP character and I decided to start writing HP fan-fiction, I wanted it to have Snape as the main character.
It's just amazing that he loved her all his life, and made a difference in the end. A real hero. That's why I love him…hope you guys enjoyed this.
Ps. I'm a little nervous here, wondering what your reaction is. It would be simply awesome if you leave a review. Thanks. =)
