Victors visit by, Luna For years we have pondered the connection between Ron and Hermione and she's got a boyfriend who just happens to be visiting Hogwarts. Hmm how could Luna possibly twist this?... Please note: I do not own Harry Potter in anny way shape or from. I am just a fan who is terified of lawyers! I only want the best for harry Potter. All characters belong to J.K. rowling and Warner Brothers. J.K. Rowling is a genius who rocks the sox of the fox! That is all. I don't own anything here except the jokes. That is all.

"Lay off Ron he's only staying for a week!" exclaimed harry as Ron sat on his bed twitching and looking out the window. "What do you mean ONLY staying for a week?!" he stared at Him as if he was attempting to nail Jell- O to the wall. "In one week Hermione could be pregnant! In one week hermione could be running off with him to that bloody American place what was it... VEGAS and getting married! In one week Hermione could be expelled from hogwarts all because of him!" It was Harry's turn to stare strangely now.

"Do you honestly believe that that's something that Hermione would do?" Ron's Paranoia only increased with these words as his eyes kept shifting towards the window. "Hermione has a dark side remember? We were a bad influence on her. Remember that time she slapped Draco across the face? Or the time she kept her time turner a secret from us?" Harry rose from his four posters and walked over to Ron and slapped him hard on the top of the head. "She had to keep the time turner from us and She only slapped Draco because we were about to beat him black and green!"

Ron took this as a personal offence. "Who are you siding with Harry? Me your best mate or Little Ms. not-pickey-will-go-out-with-everyone-but-the- one-that-realy-maters-and-wil-love-her-forever!" Harry hit him again. "Is that really the best way to describe your lifelong friend Hermione?" Ron sat there in thought for a moment. "Let's face it Harry," he said after a good 5 seconds "they should make a movie Hermulon Rouge!"

Apparently Harry's pain therapy wasn't doing its job... time to up the dosage. He rounded on Ron and began to punch and wrestle winner take all (apparently some kind of guy thing). After a 10 minute fight scene and multiple bets places by Seamus, dean, and Neville it resulted in all the boys carrying Ron down the stairs and having lavender go get Hermione from the girls dorm. Parvati was left to tell her to meet them all down the great hall as they could hold Ron there... no where to run. This all started with Victor. Victor Krum was Hermiones boyfriend of 2 years. He was a national quidditch player and was one of Ron's favorites. 2 years ago he came to participate in the tri wizard tournament and all our problems began. He and Hermione fell in love and were going out. Simple right? WRONG! One problem... Ron has a thing for hermione (oh face it we all know it). After going back to Bulgaria there's not been to much between Hermione and "Vicky" as Ron so cruelly calls him... until now. Krum's coming to visit hogwarts and teach a few flying lessons. Buckle your seatbelts this is gonna be a bumpy ride.

Thankfully as Hermione was as nervous as Ron was about Krum's return she spent a long time on her makeup. (Yes you heard me makeup. Hermione + makeup = Sprung.) It took them about 5 minutes just to force Ron out of the portrait hole. Even with the help of the entire griffindor house pushing Ron out the door and following as they dragged him down the stairs. The Saturday breeze swirled through every open window as their parade continued with Ron garbing on to random pictures and it's occupants screaming for him to let go. They made quite a racket also. They were quickly joined by Luna lovegood who had heard them all they way from the library on the other side of the castle. They only truly noticed how much noise Ron was making when professor Mgonagal Came out of her office to see what the noise was. Thanks to a fast Silencing charm from luna all Ron could do was nod when they explained that it was old Ronney's Birthday and they were about to take him into hogsmead for some butterbears.

They continued their parade down the magical stairs and were joined by the hufflepuffs Earnie and Hanna. Toying with ron's sanity and the fact that they had enough people they began to toss him up and down as they continued down (which is such a good idea when your on the 5th floor of stairs that move and are surrounded by trick stairs) their little Jamboree waltzed right into the great hall and sat Ron down allowing harry to explain why Ron had became "Ron the amazing bouncing red head" which was a real crowd pleasers. Sadly Luna's silencing charm ended and he began to scream about why exactly his pathetic hormonal teenage self needed to talk to Hermione. the answer provided by harry was simple. he was going to tell her how he felt about victor coming over. Ron began to scream and mage pathetic attempts at aparation but all was a failure. as amusing as this was the needed to know when hermione was coming. so Nevil quickly ran up to check but returned shortly with hedwig. harry looked at him oddly...."Neville I asked for hermione... why did you bring me my bird?" At this Hedwig looked utterly offended and neglected. Neville broke out into a long winded explanation of how he tried to get her and the stairs changed and lavender laughed at him, and he go hedwid and she would send pig when hermione left and something about a turtle and an airplane. Listening to all of this no one noticed the letter Ron was writing to Lavender telling her to stall hermione so he could escape... no such luck.

Fred and George pounced him and stole his parchment and began to laugh as the read the pathetic thing out loud. Almost as hard as they laughed as when te tiny barn owl plummeted from the sky and into Ron's sandwich knocking over his pumpkin juice and harry read aloud the very soggy letter, "Hermione's on her way. see you later. Good old lavender short sweet and to the point." Ron's Irish blood began to throb through his face. his ears reddened as Fred and George held him where he was. He was so terrified he was shaking. there was a murmur of bets from their small crowd. Shamus had gotten the better of dean and Neville earlier and was 20 gallons richer. He reached onto his robes and quickly found an old piece of parchment "place your bets!" he exclaimed proudly. Everyone at once again began to place all sorts of odd Betts on what Ron would do when hermione entered. Harry even joined in, "id bet Hedwig on that he chickens out!" at this hedwig had reached her boiling point. She launched from Nevill's arm and gracefully soared out the window. "No we need you! Come back" called Neville but she was gone. Seamus made pretend that he hadn't heard Harry's false bet. The final amount came out to be a little less than 200 gallons. Seamus's bet for the whole pot that Hermione would come down and just as Ron was about to say it Victor Krum would come busting through the doors and interrupt. At this the entire group bust out into laughter wondering how Seamus would pay them all.

Hermione had finally arrived making quite a scene with Lavender and Paravati following closely behind giggling... and for good reason Hermione looked like a clown with all her makeup on (clowns scare me) for she had never applied it before. As she walked the crowd parted and everyone stared looking hopeful (especially Seamus). Luna and Hanna almost on cue gasped at the horrific makeup job and rushed to her rescue. As she sat down the quickly began to wipe off mascara and lipstick muttering things like "stupid muggle crap" and a verity of Celtic phrases. Underneath the makeup hermione herself was a wreck. Her hair was up in an imitation of what it was like at the Yule ball and was frazzled and somewhat stressed. Luna immediately took a comb to it and brought it down straight again to try and get the magical gel out of it. Hermione sat and looked around at the large group of people and asked what they were all staring at. And ominous roar replied almost casually "nothing". She continued to bite on her nail and looked at harry. "Was they're something you wanted to talk to me about then?" she asked almost annoyed. Harry realizing why they were there in the first place quickly replied "Ron has something he would like to say to you right Ron?" Ron was looking worse than hermione. The audience egged him on but he couldn't say a word. Hermione turned to the group and questioned why they were all there. There was silence for a moment until Ron in a pathetic attempt to save him chimed in "it's my birthday!" Lavender couldn't take it anymore she Burst out laughing and fall over. Paravati looked over and gasped. "Hermione what are you wearing?" this was the first time attention was drawn to Hermione's robes. A close glance at them showed that they were all fools for not noticing. (They were distracted by her face). She was wearing a completely tacky looking dressing gown Yellow with Toad green and red polka dots. (Anything with the word Polka in it is evil) at this Luna sighed and went into deep thought as to what to do about them at the same time as fixing her hair. Hanna didn't even notice yet as she was to busy with wiping 17 layers of blush off hermione's poor laughable face. "Are your ears pierced Hermione?" Luna asked quickly. "No" replied the frustrated Hermione. Luna took out her wand and taped each ear twice. "They are now," she said accompanied by the shrikes of pain from hermione. A single tear came down her face Hanna began to try to use it to get some of the makeup off.

"Ron your birthday's not for a month." she said as the pain only grew worse. Luna now began to magically pull her hair up into a beautiful Knot on the top of her head letting a few strands of hair fall into her eyes. Much like Luna's present Hairdo. "Ok. Hair check, Please stand Hard part now." she said as she once more pulled out her wand. "You can borrow one of my outfits." she zapped hermiones evil polka dotted rag and it instantly turned into a floor length gown. Blue with yellow stars. It had no straps. "Perfect" Luna said examining her work. "I just don't think Mogonagaal would appreciate the shoulders and began to magically alter it. The gave up and conjured a blue cloak much like the ones they wore at hogwarts but More stylish and embroidered into the chest was L.L. in cursive writing.

She changed it to H.G. and smiled at her work. She made the skirt a bit shorter until she saw what hermione was wearing on her feet and gasped. Her shoes looked like potatoes. She changed them too beautiful almost ballet slippers. In of course blue. "Outfit check" she turned to Harry "thanks again. Because of your Article my dad bought me a whole new wardrobe!

Oh hermione you look so lovely you can keep this one I have seven others." she began to inspect the work she did on her hair and added some star hair clips here and there. Now she looked at Hanna's work. Not much had changed since she has started. "Hanna Use magic for god's sake." The boys just stared at this in complete awe of Luna's style skills after she appeared to have absolutely none herself. She Muttered quick spell and every bit of make up from Hermione's face vanished. "A few alterations" she whispered. Hermione's eyebrows began to shrink as if someone has put a lawnmower to them. She made her eyelashes grow to be a few millimeters longer and her pasty lips became moisturized. "Now what about the ears... she couldn't seem to recall anything that would go good with this outfit. "Lavender?" she called.

"May we borrow the earrings you wore yesterday?" Lavender amazed at this muttered "of course." Luna thanked her and conjured them quickly. "Face check and." she looked and hermione was still biting her nails. She taped each hand with her wand and they grew to be long and beautiful and. blue. "Nails check." this was the most amazing piece of magic Any of them had ever seen in five muinets they had given her a complete make over and she looked stunning. Sherely elegant. They all sat down and Hermione thanked Luna. Harry just realized how intimidated Ron felt now. He tried to make himself look more attractive as she also thanked Hanna. (Your lord and master Teresa apologize for all of that ill relevant crap about the makeover. I just got two into it. I promise that this will come back later in the fic I really do! : Takes a sip of Coke and continues:) Ron's courage was back now. "M'ionne?" he said in little more than a whisper. She looked at him. "Yes?" Ron swallowed all his pride and managed to get out "I... I ... I don't feel Comfortable with Victor..." Speak of the devil Victor himself opened the doors and Yelled out "Hermionniny!" Hermione rose and yelled out "Victor!" and ran to his arms. Seamus stood up on the griffindor table and screamed out at the top of his lungs " I WON! I WON!" and broke out into an elaborate dance. Hermione and Krum walked out the doors and down the path towards hogsmead and left Ron looking as if he were going to throw up. Everyone emptied their pockets and put there gold into a large bag that Seamus whipped out of his trousers. It took all four of Harry, Ron, Dean, and Seamus to bring it back up the magical stairs. And into the boys dormitory. Ron Turned away as everyone helped count Seamus's gold and sat inside his bed. He drew the curtains and was gone. Harry had never felt so bad for his friend before. He had just

Watched the girl he secretly loved walk into the arms of another man. A man that was once his hero. Harry went over to seamus and asked 'do you think you could make a donation to the help Ron gain back his woman fund?," everyone laughed and put a few gallons into a smaller bag Seamus's donation was rather large for if it weren't for him he wouldn't be rich right now. Harry himself added a few gallons and walked over to the drapes. Behind faint sobbing could be heard. He turned back and "borrowed" a box of Kleenex from Neville. Slowly he drew back the curtains and sat down on the bed next to Ron replacing them instantly. Ron sat there with tears rowling down his face and a booger the size of Scotland Hanging from his nose. Harry offered some Kleenex and tried to talk his friend through it. "It's ok Ron it's ok." he tried to comfort. We can help. Seamus', dean's and Neville feet were visible from underneath the curtains. "If you guys want to listen then you might as well come in." the curtains moved and Seamus' face was visible through the peephole. One by one they all sat at the foot of the bed and looked at Ron offering their comfort. "You know what we should do?" Harry said briskly. " We've got to make her see you as a potential boy." Ron gave him the Jell-O stare. "Of course she sees me as a boy harry."

Imbecile doesn't know what he's saying. "No she sees you as a friend who's a boy not as a Boy friend see?" Everyone caught on but Ron. "I say today we take you down to Hogsmeade and fix you up." Ron continued to stare... "What?" harry turned to the rest and said "gentlemen grab your wallets. Were going to turn this Wesley into a king!" With that each of them grabbed their moneybags (unusually large for Seamus) and walked out of the Dorm Dragging Ron along. "We need to find the girls first," exclaimed harry as they walked into the common room. Lavender was sitting on a coffee table reading and was instantly sent to get Parvati up from the girl's dorm she grumbled a bit about being a lackey and went. "Harry? What do we need girls for?" Ron said questionably. Time for Harry to reveal the master plan. "Ron once we find Hanna and Luna I will explain all." Lavender returned with Parvait and her long dark hair freshly combed "what now?" she asked Harry just instructed both of them to follow and asked where ravenclaw house was. As the escaped the fat lady who was rather biter towards Ron for he had made her hang open for so long. "It's in the dungeons" Parvati chimed "their password is Rowenda" Harry looked at her "I don't even want to know how you know that." She blushed and explained her twin sister was in ravenclaw. "Remember? Ron went to the Yule ball with her." Ron seemed worse. He had wanted to go to the ball with Hermione. " I'm sorry Ron," she added. Harry got an idea.

"Can you pose as your sister long enough to get Luna for me?" Parvati looked a little to casual for just being asked to break a rule and was off. Lavender was sent to the library to look for Hanna and Luna and to meet them back in the great hall in 10. When they reached the great hall and sat down Lavender came trudging along down the stairs with Hanna Behind her and Gracefully leapt down each steep. When at long last they reached them before they got to speak Parvati, Padma and Luna came running up the stairs to the left and ducked into a doorway and motioned for them to say that they were upstairs. Why escaped them until a long line of ravenclaws came out of the door looking angry. Harry instinctly said "They went up stairs!" and the ravenclwas bolted off. Paravati had forgotten all about padma who by the way was on the other side of Luna. Of course Padma came into the common room just as Parvati and Luna were leaving and it didn't take to long for those ravenclaws to realize that it was her twin. At least Padma was a good manicurist. "OK" said Luna "why are we all here?" harry instantly remembered. "Oh yes you ladies really did something special to hermione earlier. And Ron's having a hard time because he loves hermione but she doesn't see him as a potential boyfriend so we want to give him a new look." this was immediate cried of how sweet that was from all the girls and pledges to help the Cheer Ron up fund. Tougher they waltzed down the path to hogsmead. Luna began to check his clothes out. Old and thread bear. Torn here and there and muddy.

"First stop Madam Margaret's Robes for all occasions. How about something blue or black and mysterious?" Ron was at a loss for words. "Hmm... black. Definitely what do you think girls?" The rest all agreed for black "I seguest a red." Said Padma thoughtfully. "And gold so that they would remind her of quiditch robes. Lavender and Luna Automatically pitched their interest. In unison they both said, "Quiditch robes on guys are hot!" Harry and Ron exchanged smiles and gave each other a high five and began to dance. The girls just watched this Pathetic attempt at impressing them and laughed. "Yep" said Luna sarcastically "Pure animal Magnetism." They trudged down the muddy path into hogsmead. Hanna suggested a change of hair. Which they all agreed with. "What's wrong with my hair?" Ron protested followed by the uproar of laughter from the girls as they walked down main street and right onto Madam Margaret's Roabs for all ocaisions.

Madam Margret herself greeted them. She was a middle-aged woman with long red hair and freckles. She would have easily passed as a Wesley. "Hello how may I help you?" she said in a deep Irish Accent as she turned to them and suddenly noticed Ron there. "Hello Ronald How's your mother?" Ron smiled and said, "she's fine Aunt Maggie Da's fine to." She smiled "oh Lovely how can I help you?" Harry had remembered that Ron had said something about having an aunt in hogsmead. He had never expected it was the Taylor. "Well Ron want's to impress one of our friends Hermione Granger at the big spring ball... we need to get him some new robes and money's no object he said as they all raised their money bags. Seamus couldn't lift his that high so he just nodded. They described the robes they wanted and she began to measure.

"Ok ronneykins strip down to your undergarments and we'll try something on." there was a pause. Ron turned around to the group of people behind him ad asked where the changing room was. She conjured one and began to create an outfit as he changed. She Zapped the changing room and when he came out he was wearing the most cunning charming outfit he had ever seen hi min. he looked good. Ron himself looked down and said, "it's like what I was wearing in the mirror of erised!" "Only one touch left." she said with a wave of her wand and a shamrock appeared on the chest with a scroll underneath it with Celtic writing spelling out Weasly. They were pure satin and fashonabal. Lavender and Luna stared with their mouths open. Luna quickly ducked down to the hem to make sure the stitch would hold by double enforcing it. Everyone gawked at it. "It's perfect." Hanna said but Luna Begged to differ She tapped it once with her wand and muttered Figueroa. Then twice and muttered resistanteblon and flicked it with the words mendo. "Now it's perfect." there were no visible changes. "What did you do?" harry asked curiously. "Fire proofed, water resistant, and tear resistant. Knowing Ron here we need to be prepared for Armageddon."

Ron's Aunt Maggie agreed. "Good call." So how much Aunt Maggie?" Ron asked.

"Eh on the house. Happy early Birthday." (Oh yes go Luna and Maggie) everyone cheered on Aunt Maggie. "Come back anytime now ya here!" she called as they left. "Ok now the shoes" Hanna said as they walked into the green gnomes shoes. They left with black dancing shoes and to Seamus's relief a little less gold but sadly only two gallons each. Their little parade went into the beauticians and spoke to Mrs. Sara and Ron got a new hairstyle. Luna made sure that they magically gelled it to spike up. He looked wicked. "As for your freckles your lucky tonight is a full moon." Padma said. Parvati began to chuckle. "Why?" Ron asked. " Well tonight were gonna get some toad liver, a barrel and some ells eyes." Hanna chimed. "What do we need those for? Why... no! no no no no no! I'm not doing it!" Ron protested.

"I can't believe I'm doing this. I'm cold and I feel gross! Hermione's going to get suspicious!" Ron was standing naked in a barrel of ell eyes with a liver of toad warped around his throat. The girls began to laugh hysterically. The full moon shown on them. "Well you got your hair cut and we know how to do it. Just avoid Hermione until Tomorrow night and shell see you in a whole new light!" Harry added. "Look your freckles are clearing up already." at this Ron through some ell eyes at him. He dodged and they landed in the lake. Harry splashed Ron with water and the battle begun. Ron leapt out of his barrel still covered in ell eyes and chased after him. And into the lake. When Ron was pronounced the winner of the water fight and came out Seamus immediately offered Ron a towel. And when he tried to pat the water off his face he explained how he meant for him to wrap it around his waist. Ron asked why and only realized this when dean offered him his pants. Looking down he realized that he was in his boxers. The girls erupted in laughter and chants. The twins both began to chant "take it off". And to everyone's suprise it unleashed Ron's wild side and he threw his wet boxers at them. And jumped back into the lake with everyone's laughter. "10 years from now hermione is going to hear about this." Harry said as Ron did a victory lap around the lake. It wasn't until Seamus yelled "Dude there's a giant squid in that lake! Do you really want to be swimming in there without pants?" that Ron returned, freckles.