PROLOGUE
The first thing Alex saw when he looked out the window of Edward Pleasure's car was the buildings. There were so many of them—they reminded him of London. Tall, all plain formal colours, rising up into the sky. Some things never changed, he supposed; a city would always look like any other city, with buildings, towers and traffic everywhere. Alex surveyed the hustle of it all with a sense of detachment.
Eventually, as Edward drove past the city to a more residential area, the apartments and penthouses disappeared, replaced by suburban homes. Alex studied everything, always looking out the window, and kept his expression neutral. Internally, he was unimpressed with Sans Francisco. But he doubted anything would make him happy right now—except if Jack magically came back to life.
Jack.
Alex clenched his fists, suddenly fighting anger, grief, regret—all the emotions that threatened to take over. Instead of giving in to them he waited for numbness to seep in again.
If Edward noticed Alex's quietness, his reluctancy to talk and how his smiles weren't fully genuine, he didn't comment on it. Alex preferred it that way; he wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone about… what had happened.
Edward turned the car down a street lined with identical looking houses. It was obviously a well to do area, full of large homes with even larger gardens. Edward parked his car in front of a creme coloured house near the end of the street. The minute he turned the engine off the car was filled with a stifling silence.
Alex wanted to break it, but he didn't know what to say. Edward, meanwhile, seemed to be hesitating as well. Alex figured he was trying to think of something comforting to say, so Alex quickly shot Sabina's father a grin. "This looks like a nice house," his eyes flicked towards the house and back. "I can't wait to see inside it."
Edward smiled back. "Yes, it is nice. I know Sabina's looking forward to seeing you. So… Let's not keep her waiting any longer."
Relieved, Alex quickly stepped out of the car. He really didn't want to talk about Jack.
Inside, Sabina rushed up and hugged him quickly and he realized how much he'd missed her. Her mother—Elizabeth—asked him how his flight was. She made him and Edward some food, the atmosphere suddenly cheerful. Between that and all the light chatter, Alex felt himself relax a little.
~o~
Two weeks later Alex had gotten used to Sans Francisco, at least somewhat. Sabina was having holidays, and since Alex was going to be attending the same school as her, so was he. Sabina and her parents had spent most of them showing him around the city.
He and Sabina were on the balcony of her house now, getting some fresh air. The sun has set a while ago yet it wasn't completely dark. A few stars were starting to come out early, scattered across sky like winking eyes. Alex was leaning on the railing, looking at the city in the distance.
Sabina stood next to him. "Nervous about tomorrow?" she asked, nudging him.
"Who? Me?" Alex joked, his tone a little dry. "Alex Rider, super spy? Afraid of school?" It was the last day of the holidays; school started tomorrow.
Sabina rolled her eyes. "I knew your spy status would go to your head one day."
"No, it didn't," he said, but then paused, thinking of Jack. "Or maybe it did? I don't know… Sab?"
"Yeah?"
Alex kept his eyes ahead, still looking at city in the distance, but not really seeing it anymore. "Do you think… if I hadn't gotten too deep, or too involved, in the spy life, maybe Jack wouldn't have… well, you know." His words surprised himself. Of course she would still be alive if I hadn't become a spy, he thought bitterly. Or maybe if I'd been a better spy…
Alex turned his head, glancing at Sabina. She looked a little surprised. He couldn't blame her; he hadn't talked about Jack since he'd arrived. Sabina looked as though she was deciding whether or not to say something. "Well," she began slowly, "I don't know if it's all as simple as you're making it out to be. I mean, yeah Jack… might have lived"—Alex cringed—"but if you hadn't become a spy, then she'd have been deported, right? And she'd be in Washington when that Drevin guy would have launched the bomb in his Ark Angel."
Alex blinked at her. He hadn't been expecting an answer like that.
"I pay attention when you talk," Sabina said slyly, "Every now and then."
Alex appreciated what she had said, he really did. It made him feel a little better and a thousand times worse all at the same time. Some other spy would have stepped in, Alex told himself, right? Right. Jack would still be alive. Because if he was the only one who could have pulled that operation off, did that mean Alan Blunt was right? Was he really too much of a spy? Alex internally shook himself. "I am a little nervous about school, actually," he said, trying to change the subject.
"Oh. Right. School." Sabina met his eyes and grinned sheepishly. "Well, don't be. Everyone will love you… probably," she added, studying him.
"Oh, that sounds very encouraging," Alex said sarcastically.
"It is encouraging," Sabina laughed.
"You're right—I'll probably fit right in," Alex said, still sarcastic, although he was fighting a smile himself; laughter was infectious. "Actually, your friends were nice today," he added seriously. Earlier that day Sabina had taken him out to a pizza place near their house, where Sabina's friends had been planning on meeting up.
"Oh, yeah, they're great. See? You'll have them, at least," she said. "They thought you were, in their words, 'fun with cool hair'."
"When did they say that?"
"When you went to hang out with that new friend you made—what's his name again?" Alex had gotten along well with a boy from another school. His sister was one of Sabina's friends.
"Lucas," Alex reminded her. "You should know him. He's that girl Jenna's twin brother."
"Oh, right. I'm a little surprised he was there. Jenna rarely mentions him."
They continued talking and joking until it was completely dark and the night sky had turned that deep blackish-blue colour.
Elizabeth called for them eventually, telling them to get some rest for tomorrow. Alex followed Sabina inside, and he wondered if this time he was really free. If there would be no more spying. If no one would have the nerve to call on him again, especially after last time. Or if MI6, or the CIA, or any other secret service, simply didn't care. If they just said whatever they felt he wanted to hear—until the next time they needed him…
Alex pushed the thoughts and questions out of his mind. He decided he wouldn't waste any more of his time on that stuff, no matter how much talent (or more accurately, luck) he had for it. He was out.
Alex stepped inside the house—his house? It still felt odd to think of it that way, although the Pleasure's had insisted he make himself at home—feeling more sure of that than he had of anything in a while. He was out.
Note: One day, I will think of a better name for this story. "Alex Rider Story" just doesn't sound too great xP
