Sakura took a deep breath as she stretched her arms towards the impossibly blue sky. Fluffy clouds glided lazily by, and she couldn't help but think, it was really too bad that it was such a nice day today.
"SAKURA! EN GARDE!" Tsunade's voice ripped through the calm as five flaming volleyballs ripped through the air, all headed straight towards her. Sakura was quick to react, as she parried two of the volleyballs, kicked one to send it flying right back to Tsunade, and punched the remaining two with her bare fists. It stung a bit, but Sakura felt like showing off.
She barely had time to recover when Tsunade, dressed in a bizarre golf vest which did nothing to control her insanely-huge breasts, drew back with a great shout as she sent another volley, this time of golf balls. Sakura summoned up some chakra in her hands, which served as a buffer for the flaming objects. She caught them easily and swirled them in the palm of her hand before she served them right back at her shishou. The older woman then struck each one home, and sent them flying over the training grounds. One managed to get into a hole in the ground, as indicated by the tiny tremble of the flag that stood above it.
Sakura clapped politely. "Great shot, shishou!"
"Thank you." Tsunade bowed, looking pleased. Over the years, they had managed to create some kind of bizarre sport with rules only they understood. It involved a lot of flaming balls, with the goal is to get the hole-in-one while managing to look hot while doing it. The rules changed every now and then, but definitely, looking hot was one of the constants. Shinobi who valued their life and disliked flaming balls knew better than to train on the grounds while Sakura and Tsunade enjoyed their made-up sport.
Tsunade went over to the hole to pick up the charred golf ball. It disintegrated into dust in her hands. The older woman frowned. "Another round, Sakura-chan?" she asked happily.
Sakura yawned and stretched again. "Nah, I think I'm good, shishou."
She caught the expression on the older woman's face. "Something wrong?" she asked, as she dusted her hands off.
"Ah, I need to talk to you about something, but better come up to my office." the two women nodded to each other, and in a dual poof of smoke, transported themselves into the Hokage's office.
Tsunade sighed. "And here I was so relaxed already. We should play sports more often, Sakura-chan..."
"Good for the body and good for the mind..." Sakura finished for her. Not that she had anyone else to play it with. She crossed her arms. It was unlike her shishou to stall for time. "Anything on your mind, Tsunade-sama?"
"Well...yes." Tsunade sighed as she set down her golf club. "It's about Kakashi."
Sakura's eyes widened, already feared the worst. "Kakashi? Is everything alright?"
"Yes, yes, he's fine, the big lunk." Tsunade waved her hand dismissively, and Sakura visibly relaxed, but her curiosity now piqued. The Hokage now seated herself behind her desk and made a little show of shuffling papers around. "He's fine," she repeated. "But I have a big favor to ask of you with regards to him..." she took a deep breath. "You see, Kakashi's getting married."
Sakura, who was about to sit down on one of the chairs, missed it by an inch and ended up landing hard on her butt. The kunoichi ignored it though, as she gaped up to her shishou. "P-pardon me?"
"Mar-ried. Kakasi Hatake is getting married." Tsunade repeated as Sakura slowly stood up, mouth still agape. The Hokage brandished a scroll in front of Sakura's face, and somehow Sakura managed to read the flowy script:
You are cordially invited
To witness the joining of two hearts
Kakashi Hatake
to
Meiko Kazahana
Other than the cheesy execution of the invitation, and the implication that Kakashi had such a heart to announce it this way, Sakura's eye caught on the bride's name. Meiko Kazahana...
"She wouldn't happen to be from the Land of Spring, shishou?"
"Yes. Beloved cousin of Koyuki Kazahana, it would happen!" Tsunade said with false cheer as she snapped the scroll back. "Also the next daimyo of the Land of Spring, isn't it funny?"
"Shishou..." Sakura said warningly.
"Alright, alright." Tsunade huffed. "I know what you're thinking: arranged marriages are backward and rotten. I understand, I completely understand. But this is all Kakashi's idea." Sakura found that hard to believe, and it looked like Tsunade read her mind. "I know it's hard to believe, but he visited me a few months ago with this proposal. He's nearing forty now and he thought it would be prudent to continue his bloodline. He's practical that way, that Kakashi."
"I didn't think he'd have it in him..." Sakura said quietly. True, Kakashi was one of the more devoted shinobi of Konoha, but to propose an arranged marriage? To an heir of a daimyo, no less? All for the sake of bloodlines and alliances? It made her head swim.
"Well, he also informed me that since he's a famous war hero and all, he could also get a more lucrative marriage deal. Our alliances are strong, but inter-marriage is better, if planned and executed well." Tsunade had a sly look about her now. "It also helped that Kakashi 'accidentally' let his face show to Meiko in his last mission to Spring, and well, let's just say that he's all she could think about now."
"Eeeewwww!" Sakura made a disgusted face. Hey, wait a minute! That wasn't fair! She and Naruto had spent years plotting and scheming to see that face, and now all it took was for Kakashi to whore himself out to show it? She felt slightly disappointed in him. "That's gross, shishou. That poor girl...!"
"Now, now, you don't have to make it sound so vulgar! It's not like we're offering the son of the Noodle Dynasty to the heir of the Miso Soup Queen!"
"That's EXACTLY what it is! And since when was Kakashi such a...such a prince?!"
"This is an arrangement between two consenting adults. Who happen to be important people in their countries. Now, will you please get stop giving me that judgmental face of yours, and get on to the next part?" Tsunade was impatient now.
"What is it?"
"I need you to escort Kakashi to Spring Country."
The headache that started to throb earlier escalated by ten times. "An escort?! So he's really our prince now?! Since WHEN did he need an escort?!"
"Since he promised himself to someone who's practically a princess." Tsunade replied calmly. "Spring Country has very specific, strict traditions and we want to follow them as much as possible. One of them is for the groom to stay at Spring for a month for the wedding preparations. Traditionally, he's escorted by his family. But, since you know he doesn't have any..." she trailed off.
"Oh, come on!" Sakura stamped her foot. "Why don't you send NARUTO to do it? Or any of his other former teammates? I'm sure they'd be more than happy to see him get hitched. Sometimes I'm even surprised Kakashi remembers my name! Honestly, shishou!"
"Now Sakura..." Tsunade's voice was stern now. "We've all been through a lot together, all of us. But you're still his original genin team. That's different, and you know it." Sakura slumped back to her seat, defeated. "I'm afraid sending Naruto on this mission might cause us...some, errr, diplomatic tensions more than improve it, if you know what I mean. Same thing with Sai. This wedding is important, and I want our best foot forward. You're practically my daughter, Sakura. You'll be my eyes and ears, my proxy, but at the same time Kakashi will have someone familiar around."
On one hand, Sakura was touched that Tsunade felt that way, but on the other hand, there was some serious emotional manipulation going on here.
She was, in a word, trapped. Trapped in a mission too stupid for words, thought up by a man too idiotic to be named.
"By the way," Tsunade tossed the invitation to Sakura. "You're the Maid of Honor."
"I'M WHAT?!"
Kakashi sensed a disturbance in the air. He paused in folding his clothes and sniffed, then resumed his work.
Three...two...one.
His apartment door flew open, and his former student stood on the doorway, looking...well, he couldn't really put a name on her expression right now. Her features finally settled on looking irritated, as she crossed her arms and glowered at him.
"Oh, hello, Sakura-chan. Nice of you to drop by." he sketched a little wave and busied himself with his pack.
"I hear congratulations are in order." Sakura said flatly as she stormed in. She wasted no time to getting to the heart of the matter. "Kakashi...but WHY?"
"Hmm? Oh." he scratched his head in a distracted way. "I thought the Hokage already briefed you on this mission?"
"She did. You didn't answer my question." she sat down on his bed, looking reproachful.
He sighed. These kids...it's not like he had WANTED it, not really, but it was hard to explain to someone as young as Sakura. Hell, he'd be questioning himself if he were her age, but things had to be done, and if he was doing it anyway, why not make the most of it?
Anyway, he had hoped that Sakura would've had her questions answered by Tsunade-sama. It was too much to hope for, he guessed, but then the Hokage HAD promised to field the hard questions in exchange for his agreeing to Sakura to come along. He didn't want any sort of entourage, but he had to agree with the Hokage's point that having at least one family member around was something Spring viewed necessary. God knew he cared for many people here in Konoha, but for someone presentable...well, he couldn't go wrong with the mini-Hokage herself, Sakura Haruno.
Sakura was still waiting for an answer, though. With a sigh, he reached for something in his pouch and drew out a small box. "Sakura-chan," he began as he flipped the box open. "Do you think she'll like it?"
The effect was instantaneous. Sakura's sulky face immediately melted into awe as she gazed at the diamond ring nestled inside the box. It sparkled sunnily, and it helped soften up the kunoichi too. "It's beautiful!" she breathed.
Hmpf. Women and their jewelry.
"It was my mother's." he supplied, which of course made her a little bit more emotional. He snapped the box shut, ending the spell. She blinked confusedly at him.
"Your mother's ring..so you DO love her!" she clapped her hands happily, oddly resembling a pleased bunny for some reason. He shook his head.
"No, I don't. I just thought it would be a nice gesture." he almost laughed at Sakura's disappointed face. He shrugged. "It's not like I can wear it myself."
"So cold-hearted..." Sakura grumbled. She watched him fold away some clothes in a few blessed moments of silence. He still didn't like her judgmental look, though.
"What is it?" he finally said without looking up.
"Kakashi...I didn't think you'd be that sort of man." Sakura stood up and began to wander around his apartment. She patted Mr. Ukki and turned back to face him. "Don't you feel sorry for Meiko-san? If you really are marrying her if you don't love her?"
He began to tie up his bag tightly. "I'll learn to love her." Meiko Kazahana was pretty enough, he mused. She was no shinobi, but she had a good bloodline. She was nice and had a gentle way about her, too. It could be easy. He could do worse. "I'll do my best, anyway."
She rolled her eyes. "Oh, I'm swooning."
"I'll tell you more about our epic love story on the way there." Kakashi hoisted his bag up. He knew Sakura always kept a pack ready in case of on-the-fly missions, and that it was waiting outside.
"As epic as diarrhea, maybe..." Sakura muttered under her breath.
Kakashi paused mid-step and looked at the pink-haired kunoichi. "Sakura...you do know that this wedding is top-secret, right? I explicitly asked Tsunade-sama for your discretion."
Sakura blinked in confusion. "What do you mean? Of course I didn't-" but she didn't get to finish her sentence as Kakashi's front door slammed for the second time that day.
"My eternal rival!" Gai shouted exuberantly to no one in particular. "Felicitations on your upcoming nuptials! I understand that you wanted to do it in your usual hip style," he continued before Kakashi could respond, "...and get married in a manner most romantic and quiet to your ladylove! But alas, even your noble intentions could not stop my heart's dearest wish!"
Kakashi looked at Sakura, as if she had the answers to Gai's ramblings. Sakura looked at Kakashi, then shrugged. "He's YOUR friend," she said.
"Look, Gai...we were about to go..." Kakashi began.
But Gai shook his head, which made a quite interesting effect on his bowl-shaped haircut. "I am not here to challenge you, my eternal rival! Although that is quite a natural assumption! No, no, no." He flashed his too-bright smile and pointed a finger to confused-looking Sakura. "I am here to challenge YOU, Haruno-san!"
"M-me?" Sakura pointed to herself.
"Yes! I am sure it has not escaped your attention that I am Kakashi's oldest and dearest friend." Gai said. Kakashi had to stop himself from snorting. Oldest, yes. Dearest? That was cutting it close, even for Gai.
"And as such," Gai continued, "I believe that I have right of first refusal as Kakashi's Best Man."
Kakashi glared at the man in the green spandex, and wished that his normal eye had the power to put people on fire in a second. "Therefore, I will challenge you for it!"
Sakura smirked then raised two fingers in farewell. "You can have it, Gai-san. No need to challenge me over it. See ya!"
"H-hoy! Sakura!" Kakashi hurried after her and put one hand on her shoulder. She looked mightily amused. "You can't just walk out on a MISSION like this!" he hissed, hoping that somewhere he had taught this girl some sort of feeling of..of..RESPONSIBILITY towards classified, top-secret missions.
Sakura just looked bored. "This is a stupid mission anyway, and it's a waste of my time."
"Tsunade-sama's not going to be happy about this." Kakashi hated pleading, but no way in hell was he going to bring Gai along to his wedding!
She shrugged. "She'll get over it. And what worse can she do to me?"
"It would really mean a lot to me, Sakura-chan."
She studied her nails in disinterest. "...Nyeeeh," she finally said.
Damn this girl. He had a brainwave. He extended one hand. "I'll teach you Chidori."
Sakura suddenly went stock-still. Green eyes turned to him in suspicion. "I beg your pardon?"
Kakashi leaned back. "You heard what I said."
The annoyed look she was wearing earlier returned. "So you're going to teach me something that you should've taught me all those years ago? So I can go to your crummy wedding? My opinion of you is going lower and lower by the minute, Kakashi."
"Hey, don't oversell yourself. I couldn't have taught you Chidori at your state back then." She looked like she was going to retort angrily, so he beat her to the punch. "But, hey, if you don't think you're up to it, then I guess you better wave that white flag to Gai right now."
She threw him a look of deepest irritation and marched back to Gai, who was still striking a ridiculous pose. She extended a hand towards him.
"Gai-san, I accept your challenge."
A/N: Funny story. I have a 7k word monster of a chapter waiting for Hanabira. I tussled with it for a moment, lost, and it told me that I should train some more. Hence this fic. But it should be ready after I get my thoughts straight about it.
I should warn you that this is fluff, fluff, fluff. That means all those dudes who bring a negative vibe (read: big baddies), are all eating biscuits in Britain. That includes Sasuke. Don't worry, they're happy there, too!
The line about the Noodle Dynasty and Miso Queen was shamelessly ripped off from the movie Sabrina.
That said, I hope you enjoyed it and review! :) Thanks.
