I write, mostly on hotel paper

Knowing, that my thoughts will never leave this room

I'd be out of line telling you, leave her

So why lie, I'm only surrounded by you… oh oo

By you… oh

I guess I'm writing this because I feel like I have no other place to turn. I remember when I was a little girl I had a diary. But then when I went to college I completely dumped the idea. Now several years later here I am in a hotel room writing down everything that comes to my mind.

When I'm done I'll probably tear this up and throw it in the trash. But that doesn't matter. It's not like any one will find out anyways. It's not like I can tell the man I love to leave his wife. Though maybe some other bitch would. But I'm not like that. I never stole other girls' boyfriends and I'm not about to steal another woman's husband. But I can't help felling what I feel. It's only him for me.


Lately, I can't be happy for no one

They think I need some time to myself… oh oh

I try to smile but I can't remember

I know tomorrow there'll be nothing else… oh

I remember when he told me "Olivia I think you should take a couple days off." Yea I guess even around him I can't act like I'm ok. He probably just thinks that I'm over stressed out or got something on my mind and need some time to myself. Actually I don't know what's better. Always being around him and faking or being away from him and missing him. It's not like anything is going to change.


And I…I wanted to be
Giving you everything
She's not giving
And I…I wanted to see
Because you didn't believe what I'd been hearing… oo oo… oh oh

I always wanted him to love me. I wanted to be his only. I could've given him so much more then any other woman. More then his wife ever gave him. But I guess I'm just talking nonsense but I can't help feeling what I feel. When I herd about your problems at home I wanted to talk to you. When I herd you might get divorced I did talk to you. I felt bad for you but I anted you for myself so bad that I was almost happy when I thought that this could be my chance. The rumor was as good as false.


You turned out to be more than I bargained for
And I can tell that you need to get away
Forgive me if I meant that I'd love to love you
We both realized it way too late

We started out as friends. But then I got caught up in you. I told you that day when you said I should take a couple of days of that "I could really use a vacation." I guess I did need to get away. Of course when you asked if I'm ok I said that I'm just tired. What I thought was 'I love you you fool what do you think?' If you understood the way I looked at you was special then I guess you chose not to say anything.


And I…I wanted to be
Giving you everything
She's not giving
And I…I wanted to see
Because you didn't believe what I'd been hearing
Maybe this wind blowing in just came from the ocean

I just want a chance to prove myself to you. I just want you to be happy but I want to be happy too. You know I herd that she's cheating on you with another man. I wanted to catch her in the act. Because of course you'd never believe me if I told you. But why should I ruin your marriage and your life. Exposing her still want get me you. And ether ay you'd get hurt. But if I don't tell ou you might not. Thought I doubt it.

I write mostly on hotel paper

I guess I'll just have to deal with this on my own. Gee Elliot isn't there any way…