Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing. This is not my finest work, but hopeful it can provide some laughs.

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News Report: Strife in the Peace Conference

Anime Reporters; Ibiki Kaihei

Posted: January 1, AC 197

Relena Peacecraft held a conference today to discuss the peaceful exchanges with the colonies planned for the next year. However, after a few questions from a persistent guest, reporters doubt the surety of these plans.

"The Earth Sphere Unified Nation," began Foreign Relations Representative Peacecraft, "and the colonies have co-existed in peace for the past year with only a few minor disagreements."

The diplomat continued to review several peaceful measures that had been implemented with success. She then briefly touched on a few "minor misunderstandings."

At this point, the inquisitive civilian, now identified as Duo Maxwell, asked a few probing questions.

"Would you consider the attack on Earth by colony X18999," he began, stressing the repeated integer, "a minor misunderstanding?"

Representative Peacecraft failed to give a direct reply when pressed. Several questions followed, including specifics on any new laws to be implemented.

"All form of weaponry will be confiscated and destroyed." Representative Peacecraft continued.

Duo Maxwell's hand popped up again. "Doesn't that violate our rights? Like life, liberty, and death?"

Peacecraft returned by correcting the young man, and clarifying that if a right puts a person's life at risk it should be removed. Maxwell then inquired if the right to life was the most important of rights.

"We must do whatever it costs to protect life and peace."

"Then you are promoting war!" Maxwell interjected. "More people die when you sit around and talk than when you get off your butt and stop the killing."

This argument continued for several minutes, ending with Representative Peacecraft's firm statement that negotiations can solve everything. Maxwell and several of the diplomats seemed unconvinced.

While Peacecraft defended her stance, Maxwell was scolded by a companion, young heir Quatre Rebarbra Winner.

"You shouldn't ask such questions," Winner frowned. "It isn't polite or like a gentleman."

Duo slumped in his chair, remaining in sullen silence for several minutes before an idiotic grin crossed his face. "Good thing I'm not either of those!" His hand shot up once more, to the dismay of his companion.

"There are laws now that forbid killing, right?"

Peacecraft confirmed the validity of the statement.

"So you are essentially making laws that tell people not to break laws… how will this work? They were breaking laws in the first place!"

Representative Peacecraft had no response.

As the representative asked for final questions, doubtful comments rippled through the crowd. In one of the most unsettling peace conferences in history, Maxwell closed with a final statement.

"You said people begin wars because they have weapons, right? So, you are going to take away all the weapons. What are you gonna to do; chop off everybody's fists?!"

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Author's Note: Ugh, I don't know what else to add. If you have any ideas of more questions, I'll be more than happy to update.