The song that I have Will sing is called Fallen Angel by Three Days Grace if you would like to listen to it while reading. Also the lyrics aren't in the correct order for the convenience of the story. The lyrics are from A-Z Lyrics, so if any of them are wrong, I apologize.
If you are coming to read this just to hate on it because you are a homophobe or for some other reason, please push the back button. I will not take kindly to it, after all, I took the time to write this.
*WARNING* This contains hurtful comments, MAJOR OOC-NESS (yes, it's a new word XD) mentions of cutting and suicide, cursing, and homophobia. If you are not comfortable or sensitive to these topics, PLEASE DO NOT READ!
*Disclaimer* I do not own PJO, HoO, or the song Fallen Angel.
Nico's P.O.V
The Hades' cabin was just as dark and dreary as it was when it was first built, but Will seemed to make it better. We were laying on my bed and were just quietly talking about nothing and anything at the same time, our hands clasped together. It was nice and comforting, and for the first time in a long time, I felt safe. I felt secure in Will's arms, like for a moment I wouldn't have to worry about the constant monsters that threatened our lives daily or the nightmares that plagued my dreams, I could finally just relax. And in that lackadaisical state, I drifted off to sleep.
'I just wish that they would go away' I thought. I wish I never went down there. Here I was again, in that hell hole. Literally, Tartarus is the demigod hell. But that's beside the point, the real problem is why am I back here again? Do the fates just hate me that much? I guess so.
In the middle of my dilemma, the trouble started. The monsters came greeting me with their razor sharp claws, and the piercing images of my past. Some of the demons transforming into Hades, Jason, Percy, and Will. Oh gods, Will. Why did he have to be here?
"I don't even know why I'm friends with you, you worthless fag. You don't have any self control, cutting yourself like a bloody emo. Why do you even bother trying to hide it, why not just kill yourself? It would be better for all of us. " Jason sneered at him.
Now that one cut through hme like a bullet. 'Did people really think that? Am I better off dead?' (Sleeping with Sirens) he thought. I trusted Jason with all of my secrets, what caused this betrayal. Or was it there all along? (DUN DUN DUN. Sorry… I had to. )
"You are no son of mine. I hate you. I wish you died in Tartarus, then I wouldn't have to see you in the underworld after you die. All my other children in the past, even Bianca, did so much better in avenging my name. Now because of you, my name is mocked and laughed at instead of feared. YOU ruined my image and you will forever pay for it. I will make your life even worse than what you went through in Tartarus and you will be begging to die, but I won't let you. I'll keep resurrecting you and keep torturing you till you wish that you have never have come out of your mother's womb on January 28th, 1924." Hades ridiculed me. Stepping forward with each sentence, and at the end of his speech, he was face to face with me.
Just as I was about to retort, he spit in my face and stormed away. That one didn't sting as much- because I already knew of some of these things, not the last part but enough- but it did still hurt. He was my "father" after all. I wonder if I can still call him father. Hopefully. That would be one awkward situation to explain to the new campers who came up to me. "I'm Nico di Angelo, my godly powers belong to Hades, but I can't call him my father so don't ever say that I am his son. Fear me!" AWKWARD! I'm joking, I would never actually say that. WOW, I can actually make a joke when being I'm insulted. That's new…
"Why did you even like me, you little brat? You are a stupid little kid who can't do nothing for shit. You are NOTHING and MEANINGLESS. You mean nothing to any of us. We only kept you around for your powers. Which was stupid on our side because, you're weak. You're a weak faggot who can't take anyone pointing out the truth to you. We never needed nor will need you ever. I hope you end in the Fields of Punishment, after all... you deserve it." Percy snarled at him, with a damned smirk on his face the whole time.
Did Percy really feel that way? He was like my brother, was I really just a bother? I guess I am a obstacle in the way, a weight dragging him down. Someone who should die. As much as I thought this hurt, I was never prepared for the next one.
"Well, well, well, what do we have here? A little gay rat. A rodent that needs to be experimented on, then disposed. But I guess since stage one has already been done, *pause* I'll have to finish out the rest. *Smiles wickedly* First, the mental part. *Cackles* I NEVER loved you! You are a trivial NEEDY imbecil. No one ever wanted you. Not in 1924 nor now. You are so easy to fool, having panic attacks whenever someone mentions the truth to you. You can't handle the real world. You are WICKED. A DISGRACE to the demigod name and your own heritage. You're a MONSTER. You killed Lycaon viciously. You showed no mercy, you enjoyed killing him. You're the reason that your mother and Bianca died. Zeus already knew that you would be nothing but repulsive mistake so that's why he tried to kill you. Now, onto the main event. This time, I won't miss..." Will said maliciously.
Gasping, I stumbled back, words echoed throughout my head. Failure, unlovable, unwanted, stupid, ugly, worthless, insufferable, needy, monster, wicked, disgrace, and undesirable.
Will lunged at me, a knife inside his outstretched hand but I couldn't move, I was too shocked to do anything but stare blankly at Will, dumbstruck. The knife plungled in my chest, inches away from heart, but I think that was the point. If I died instantly, I wouldn't feel pain. Elongating my death was the goal the whole time. I just want to die, it would be better for everyone. After all, why would they lie to me?
So there I lay, on the floor, writhing in pain while Will used the blade to create deep lacerations on my skin. Eyes and mouth wide open displaying fear, pain, and betrayal.
Will's P.O.V (Before and during Nico's nightmare)
I smiled down at Nico, happy that he finally fell asleep. For not sleeping for such a long time, carrying the Athena Parthenos, and going through Tartarus really took a toll on his overall health. While I was busy thinking, Nico started to whimper. This could only mean two things. He is either having a nightmare or he is in pain. Maybe even both, you could never be too careful with him. To try and calm him down, I started to run my hand through his hair and rub his back. Those were some of the things that calmed Nico down the most when he has panic attacks and nightmares. I hope it works this time. This nightmare seems to be really bad.
"Hush, darlin', you're fine. You're not there anymore. Shh, shh angel, I'm here. I got you. They're not real. You need to wake up darlin'. You're fine." I said in hushed, soothing, tones.
Yet, Nico still laid still as a rock, now full on crying and moaning. Frowning, I turned on my side, facing Nico, and pulled him close till I was spooning him.
"I've got you sweetie. You just need to wake up. Come on sweetie, you can do it. Get out of there. I'm here. I got you, darlin'."
Nico may never admit it but, he loved pet names. They always made him feel special, he said, and Will was more than happy to comply. They had been dating for about 2 years. Like friends don't call each other pet names unless they are being sarcastic, which for teenagers, is almost always. 'Why am I thinking about this right now? Nico is hurting. Bad Will.' I thought.
Thinking hard, I finally remembered something that almost always (like 96%) worked to wake him up. Singing. He said that it calmed him down, and that my voice was very pleasing to here. I just grinned and pulled him into a hug. I found a song recently. It was called Fallen Angel by Three Days Grace. It was one of the best songs that I have ever heard. It wasn't too depressingly sad but it still had a darker message. It also reminded me of a book I once read, well, I'm technically still reading it but it is a series of six books but the author wrote a total of three series, so I have got a lot a lot of reading ahead of me (The Mortal Instruments, The Infernal Devices, and The Bane Chronicles.)
I shifted close to Nico so that my mouth was hovering a few inches a from his ear.
"Late at night I can hear your crying. I hear it all, trying to fall asleep.
When all the love around you was dying, how did you stay so strong? How did you hide it all for so long? How can I take the pain away, how can I save a fallen angel?"
I sang quietly, afraid to let the sound carry outside the door. I heard this song and instantly fell in love with it. I think it describes my relationship in it's early stages, and even now, pretty well. Especially the chorus.
"You do it all for my own protection. You make me feel like I'll be okay. Still, I have so many questions."
"Fallen angel, in the dark. Never thought you'd fall so far. Fallen angel, close your eyes, I won't let you fall tonight. Fallen angel, just let go, you don't have to be alone. Fallen angel, close your eyes, I won't let you fall tonight.
" I was right be side you when you went to hell and back again. And I, I couldn't save, a fallen angel."
I started to silently cry at this part. The song was right. I couldn't save him. I couldn't save from falling into hell, I couldn't save him from his fears, I couldn't save him from others. I failed. But never mind that now, it's Nico who needs to be comforted, not him.
"Hush darlin'. Wake up for me sweetie."
Whether it being the sound of my voice or something else, Nico woke up. Frankly, he woke up sobbing and shaking, but he was awake.
"You're alright. I'm here. You're fine darlin'." I murmured.
And that how it went for the next several hours. Me whispering sweet nothings, holding him close, and rubbing his back. Nico clutching me tightly, as if he was afraid I would disappear. There were many things I knew he'd want to talk about in the morning, but for now, we stayed like this. In each other's arms.
"Fallen angel in the dark, just let go, you don't have to be alone..."
WHOO! I finished it. Do you want me to do a sequel where Nico talks about his dream with Will, and how he doubts Will love for him? Thanks anyways for reading!
