Disclaimer: Extreme Ghosbusters based on the original motion picture Ghostbusters by Dan Aykroyd and Harold Ramis. Approximately 50 percent of the material in this story is lifted directly from the episode "Witchy Woman", written by Robin Bernheim (the vast majority of Bernheim's material appears in Part 1).
Extreme Ghostbusters Apocrypha: Witchy Woman
Part 1
A plain, red-haired girl in a dowdy grey dress carried a loaded tray across the length of the coffee house. When she reached a particular table she held the tray against her hip with one hand, using the other to place a cup of coffee in front of her customer.
"There you go, Chip," said the girl, Bess, smiling awkwardly at the beefy blond teenager. "One deluxe iced mocha. And a biscotti," she added timidly, laying the said biscotti in front of him. "Compliments of the house. Well… compliments of me, actually."
"Thanks… I guess," said Chip, watching with distaste as the girl's cheeks coloured.
"This seat taken?"
A beautiful black girl with long, flowing hair pushed her way past Bess, knocking her tray to the ground. Aghast, Bess stared down at the mess on the floor for a moment; then she stooped down and began to sweep fragments of broken china onto the tray.
"Can I help you?" the pretty girl asked sarcastically, catching Bess' eye as she rose to her feet. Then, smiling nastily, she added, "Troll."
Bess gasped, going even more vividly red, then turned and hurried over to the bar where her two friends were waiting for her.
"Could she be any more conceited?" Wanda, a short-haired blonde, said distastefully.
"What does he see in her, anyway?" added the third girl, Celine, curling her lilac-painted lip with disdain.
Bess, choking out an ironic laugh, said, "Aside from the fact that she's absolutely gorgeous?"
Bess clearly felt humiliated, but Wanda seemed to find some amusement in the situation. She leaned on the bar and laughed sinisterly to herself, her eyes narrowing maliciously on Chip and his absolutely gorgeous date.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
The girl turned in the doorway and smiled seductively at Chip.
"So," she said. "Tomorrow night, then?"
"I'll, uh, swing by at seven," Chip said smoothly.
They kissed, both mumbling their appreciation into each other's lips, unaware that they were being watched from the side of the apartment building.
"Open the circle," said Wanda.
Celine and Wanda joined hands. Bess looked hesitant, but only for a moment, and then took the hands of her two friends. They all closed their eyes and lifted their chins.
"Great Surnunos," said Wanda, "wherever you be, impart your spirit down to me."
There was a rush of wind; dark clouds gathered directly above their heads, and from these emanated the form of a large bearded man.
"What can I do for you ladies?" he asked politely.
"There is one who deserves to be punished," said Wanda.
"Let me guess," said Surnunos, in the tones of one who has had the same conversation a tedious number of times before. "You need the power to serve up a little… justice?"
Without waiting for a reply, he gathered up a handful of bright lightning from his own personal clouds and directed it at Bess, Wanda and Celine. The trio glowed as the power washed over them, and then Wanda placed her hand against the wall.
"Let the punishment fit the crime," she intoned.
Again, Bess looked hesitant, but only for a moment. She then mirrored Wanda's action, and the power was sent up the drainpipe towards the pretty girl's apartment.
The girl, meanwhile, was grooming herself in the bathroom. She filled the basin with water, smiled appreciatively at her own face in the mirror, and then began to splash water over it. Then suddenly she stopped, her hands feeling some difference in her features. When she looked up, she saw in the mirror the face of a hideous troll. She stared for several lingering seconds, unable to believe her eyes. Then, when her reflection failed to change back to the one she was used to, she let out a shrill scream.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
"Ah, this is very bad." Egon Spengler was looking around at the dirty dishes that overflowed from the sink, spilling out to various parts of the kitchen. "Whose turn is it to clean up in here?"
Garrett Miller wheeled his way into the room, waving a piece of paper around, and said, "According to the schedule, it's Kylie's turn."
"No way," said Kylie Griffin, who evidently had overheard the conversation from the next room, where she was sitting at the table surrounded by open books. "I got a major term paper due tomorrow." As Garrett wheeled his way into the room she snatched the schedule from him and said, "I traded with Roland, see?"
"But I," said Roland Jackson, appearing at her shoulder as if from nowhere, "traded with Eduardo."
At these words Eduardo Rivera wandered into the room and, apparently having somehow picked up most of the conversation, said, "I've got the same class as Kylie: babes in books."
"That's women in literature," Kylie said irritably.
"A class about babes, and I get three credits," said Eduardo. "Does this rule or what?"
"It's a class about literature," said Kylie. "And you only get three credits if you do the work. Have you even started yet?"
"Well, no, not really," said Eduardo.
"Eduardo, it's due tomorrow!"
"Yeah, well… you only just started."
"Yeah, I know, and I'm paying for it now," said Kylie, turning her attention back to her books. "Thank goodness I don't have to clean up the kitchen."
"It's all yours, Eduardo," added Roland.
Eduardo turned to face him. "Weren't you listening? Term paper. I gotta be in the library all night." He then turned back to Kylie, stooped to her level and said furtively, "Where is the library, anyway?"
Kylie gave him a withering look. "Eduardo, I know you're not as stupid as you pretend to be. If you'd just put in some effort…"
"Nevertheless," said Egon, "your name is still on the schedule. Save me a few mould samples, if you would," he added, handing Eduardo a Petri dish.
Eduardo looked about to protest, but was saved the trouble when Janine Melnitz came in and said to Egon, "Sorry to interrupt the powwow, chief, but we just got a call: there's been a level five manifestation on campus."
Eduardo looked faintly smug as he said, "Sorry, Egon, duty calls," and took off with the other three younger Ghostbusters.
"Who's going to clean the kitchen?" Egon demanded.
As if one cue, Slimer flew in babbling something that sounded like, "I'll do it!" He picked up one of the dishes in the sink, and began to lick it clean with great sweeps of his oversized tongue.
"Crude," said Egon, "yet effective."
"I hope you don't think I'm eating off those," Janine said dryly.
"Of course not," said Egon. "It's a start, but I'll make sure Eduardo gets around to washing them properly later. In the meantime, you and I had better go out for lunch."
Janine smiled coyly. "Are you asking me out on another date, Dr. Spengler?"
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
The Ecto-1 pulled up outside the apartment block at which Chip had earlier dropped off his narcissistic date, and the four Ghostbusters piled out onto the street.
"Subject's name is Tina Bell," announced Roland, apparently somehow having learnt this information since leaving the firehouse.
Eduardo started. The name clearly meant something to him. "As in, Tina Bell: homecoming queen, head cheerleader and world class A, number one babe?"
"Ok," said Garrett, "now try saying it without slobbering."
"Yeah, put your tongue away," added Kylie, sounding faintly put out. "Y'know, girls like her are a dime a dozen."
"I'll bet pretty ain't all she is," Eduardo said tartly. "I know her type real well. My sensitive side drives them wild."
"Hm," Kylie said shortly. "I must be immune."
"You're not her type," retorted Eduardo.
"You mean I'm not vain and shallow and selfish? I should darn well hope I - "
"Guys," Roland said soothingly.
Eduardo squared his shoulders, stepped away from Kylie and went to knock on the door.
"Who is it?" a female voice asked timidly from the other side.
Eduardo cut a glance over his shoulder at Kylie, and then said loudly, "It's your knight in shining…"
The door inched open, and Eduardo found himself staring into the face of a hideous troll.
"Ar…mour," he finished weakly.
"Come in," said Tina, her voice choked with unshed tears. "Thank you for getting here so quickly."
"No problem, Tina. Now, where did this happen?" asked Kylie.
"The bathroom," said Tina. "I'll show you where it is."
She led the four Ghostbusters through to the bathroom, Eduardo now lagging behind. Kylie waited for him to catch up with her, and then said, "You're no longer interested in finding out if there's more to her, then."
"Jackpot!" exclaimed Garrett, once he was through the bathroom door.
Kylie broke away from Eduardo and followed him in, looking down at the PKE meter in her hand.
"This place is crawling with ecto!" she said.
Roland wandered over to the basin and, noticing that it was still filled with water (Janine had probably told Tina not to touch anything), whipped out a test tube and dunked it in.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
Wanda, Celine and Bess were sitting cross-legged in a circle, on the wooden floor of an attic room. Their ghostly friend, Surnunos, was hovering over them once again.
"You promised to make us the most popular girls on campus," pouted Wanda. "What's taking so long?"
"Dear heart," Surnunos said gently, "I told you you'd need a fourth believer. Earth, wind, air and fire; north, south, east and west; John, Paul, George and Ringo. Is this gelling for you?"
"Chill, ok?" Celine said irritably. "We get it already."
"I'm only trying to please," said Surnunos. "Remember: the more power I have, the more power you have."
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
"Eurgh." Eduardo shuddered as he walked through the campus library with Kylie. "This place gives me the creeps."
Kylie raised her eyebrows. "Too dank and spooky?"
"Too many books."
She shot him an irritable look as they approached an empty table. "You want my help or not?"
"Yeah, yeah, sure." Eduardo sat down, leaned back in the chair and lifted his feet onto the table. "So, who are you writing about?"
"The witches in Macbeth," said Kylie, pulling a book from one of the shelves and showing it to him.
"Mm, more weird chicks," said Eduardo. "Figures. You would have been in trouble if that book had been checked out, wouldn't you? And you're hard on me for not being more organised."
"Yeah, well, I've been distracted," mumbled Kylie, sitting down opposite him.
He raised his eyebrows. "Yeah? With what?"
"Never mind." She sat down, pushing Eduardo's feet off the table as she did so. "Now about these witches. Their powers are arcane, and unknowable. They symbolise the uncontrollable forces controlling Macbeth's fortunes - and his fate."
Kylie prattled on about the symbolism in Macbeth, unaware that three pairs of eyes were watching her from behind a backless bookcase.
"I think we've found our fourth," said Wanda.
"Are you sure?" Bess asked dubiously.
"She understands the power of witches," said Celine. "And she even dresses right."
Eduardo wandered over to Kylie's side of the table and stooped, peering over her shoulder at the book. "Erm… does this Macbeth dude have a sister I could write about?"
"Eduardo!" exclaimed Kylie. "When you got your place on this course, somebody else missed out on it - somebody who actually wanted to learn. If you really don't care about your education, then I don't see why I should - "
"Excuse me," said Wanda, and Kylie looked up in surprise. "We were looking for the section on… demonology?"
"Two rows down," Kylie said dismissively.
Eduardo cut Kylie a quick glance and then rose to his full height, making his way over to Wanda.
"Allow me," he said smoothly. "We have a very extensive selection."
"Macbeth," observed Wanda, sweeping past Eduardo to approach Kylie, while her two friends hung behind. "Cool."
Kylie looked up. "It's my single favourite play."
"Yeah," Eduardo cut in. "How about those witches? Are they symbolic or what?"
"I'm Wanda," Wanda told Kylie. Then, gesturing to her two friends, she added, "This is Celine, and Bess."
"Kylie," said Kylie.
"And I," Eduardo said grandly, "am Eduardo."
"Listen," said Wanda, still looking at Kylie, "we were gonna check out this new occult bookshop. Wanna come?"
"Sorry," said Kylie, sounding genuinely rueful. "I got a paper."
"If not now," Wanda said, her voice heavy with suggestion, "soon."
She walked away, with Celine and Bess trailing her like two obedient dogs.
"Hey!" Eduardo called, and began to follow them. "Er - I'm free!"
Wanda let Celine and Bess go ahead of her through the door, and then went through herself. Eduardo caught them up just in time to have the door slammed in his face.
"Heh-heh, oh yeah," he said, half to Kylie and half to himself. "She digs me."
Kylie scowled at him. "You think so, do you?"
"Well, I - "
"Get back over here, Eduardo. Why did you tell them you were free? You're with me. Uh, I mean… you have to write this paper. You'll fail the class if you don't get it done."
"Why do you even care?" asked Eduardo.
"Because," said Kylie, "you asked for my help, and I don't appreciate being dropped like a hot potato when I'm right in the middle of giving it to you! My, um, help, that is," she added awkwardly.
Eduardo blinked. "I'm sorry, Kylie."
"Go pick a book," Kylie said shortly, "preferably one you've read - if such a thing exists - and we'll talk about the women in it."
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
Eduardo and Kylie both looked a little bleary-eyed the next morning as they stood, with Garrett and Roland, watching Egon's computer screen over his shoulder.
"I ran a complete spectral analysis on the ecto matter you found," Egon was saying. "The residual energy indicates a trans-dimensional molecular destabilising element, consistent with metamorphological realignment."
With Eduardo apparently too tired to speak, Garrett said dryly, "In Inglés, por favor?"
Kylie answered by stating the obvious: "Whatever did this can turn a homecoming queen into a troll."
"Note these irregularities in the frequency," Egon went on, gesturing at the diagrams on-screen. "This suggests an indirect source. The ecto energy must have passed through something else before it reached its victim. But who could be controlling it, and why?"
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
A slow-moving football game was in progress on one of the campus playing fields. There were no spectators in the stands, but two underneath them, watching the action from between the gaps in the seats. Bess stood nearby, but refused to look at the game.
"He is such a fox," said Celine, watching Chip as he ran across the field.
Bess sighed. "Would you guys give it a rest already? He's not interested in me."
Wanda turned round. "With Tina out of the way," she said, grabbing Bess' shoulders, "he's food on the table."
"But…" Bess gasped as Wanda pushed her forcibly towards the football field. "What will I say?"
Before she knew quite what was happening, Bess found herself standing outside the locker room and hailing Chip as he approached.
"Hi, Chip," she said awkwardly. "Remember me?"
"Oh, right," said Chip, looking down at her with some disdain. "The, uh, biscotti fairy."
Bess laughed nervously. "I-I'm in your chemistry class too. I thought maybe, uh, we could, er - "
"What?" Chip said nastily. "Tina's out of town five minutes and suddenly every twig comes falling out of the trees?"
He turned his back on her and disappeared into the locker room. Her eyes shining with unshed tears, Bess fled back underneath the spectator stands.
"Who does he think he is?" fumed Celine.
"Look," said Bess, "let's not do anything rash."
"Open the circle," said Wanda.
Bess looked reluctant, but Wanda's tone broached no argument. The trio joined hands, and within moments Surnunos was floating above them.
"Ahh… what is it now?" he asked irritably.
Wanda scowled. "You work for us, remember?"
"If I may remind you…" said Surnunos.
"Yeah, yeah, you're gonna give us powers beyond our wildest dreams," said Wanda. "But only if we find a fourth believer."
"Well said," said Surnunos. "And she would be…?"
"I told you, we're working on it," snapped Wanda. "In the meantime - did you see what that conceited jerk did? He called Bess a twig."
Without any further argument, Surnunos gave them his power and promptly vanished.
"Let the punishment fit the crime," said Wanda.
As the trio glowed with the power of Surnunos, Chip walked out onto the football field, looking no different in spite of having spent the past few minutes in the locker room. The three witches opened their eyes, and watched as Chip began to transform.
"Cool," said Celine, a smile playing on the corners of her mouth.
Chip's legs had started to sprout roots, and were fixing themselves to the football field. Celine and Wanda grinned, and Bess gaped in horror, as his whole body began to metamorphose into the form of a tree. He screamed until his voice was lost to him and his terrified face became etched into the tree, no longer human but just a disconcerting variation of colours in the bark.
"And this," said Wanda, smiling malevolently, "is only the beginning."
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
Kylie sat in the lecture hall beside Eduardo, who was seriously considering falling asleep.
"Before we start I'd like to collect your term papers," droned the lecturer standing at the front of the room.
Suddenly a beeping sound started up, rousing Eduardo from the early stages of sleep.
"Wha-?" he exclaimed, sitting up suddenly.
"Would you mind shutting off that beeper, please?" the lecturer said irritably.
Kylie picked up her shoulder bag, fumbled around inside and eventually pulled out a very excited PKE meter.
"Something around here is red hot," she said, getting to her feet. "We gotta book."
"Do you have to carry that thing around everywhere?" Eduardo asked irritably.
Kylie grabbed him by the cuff of his jacket and pulled him to his feet.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
Eduardo soon found himself following Kylie into the men's locker room.
"Kylie, what are you doing?" he exclaimed, mortified, as she charged through a fair few protesting semi-naked men.
"Coming through, Ghostbusters," said Kylie, keeping her eyes on her humming PKE meter, with Eduardo on her heels.
"Hey!" A loud, stereotypically overweight sports coach of some kind stepped into their path. "Women aren't allowed in here!"
"It's ok," faltered Eduardo. "She's not really a woman."
"I want her outta here!" roared the coach.
Fortunately, Kylie turned at that point and began heading back towards the exit.
"Nice chatting with you," Eduardo said to the coach, and made to follow her. "Hey, Kylie. How mad would you be at me if I burst into the women's locker room like that?"
"I'm trailing a paranormal entity," Kylie said shortly.
"That doesn't answer my question."
"Look, I'm sorry, ok? Come on - we have to follow this trail."
The trail quickly took them out to the football field, where Wanda, Bess and Celine still happened to be behind the stands. They watched in mild astonishment as Kylie and Eduardo walked past, heading towards the tree that had once been Chip.
"We're onto something," said Kylie.
"Like expulsion, maybe?" retorted Eduardo.
"What's she doing here?" whispered Bess.
At that point the Ecto-1 turned up, and screeched to a halt on the edge of the football field. Fortunately, nobody came over to object.
"We got your signal," said Roland, as he and Garrett piled out of the car. "What have you found?"
Eduardo blinked. "What sig-?"
"An ecto trail," said Kylie. "The readings are the same as Tina the troll's."
"Kylie's a Ghostbuster?" murmured Celine, from her position behind the stands.
"I told you we should leave her alone," Bess lamented.
Wanda looked at her sharply. "Are you kidding? She's perfect. She's gotta be a true believer."
"Guys!" Garrett called his three colleagues over to the tree in the middle of the field, which they had all rather cleverly failed to notice until that point. "I think I've found something. Unless of course the school has a new philosophy on gardening."
Roland noticed something wedged between the roots of the tree and, stooping down to retrieve it, he plucked out a red hardback book. He then opened it to the inside cover and read aloud the somewhat unimaginative dedication, " 'Property of Chip Hanson'."
Kylie took a PKE reading of the tree, watched closely by Garrett, who said, "So's this."
"Hey, Kylie." Wanda approached, followed again by Celine and Bess. "What's going on?"
"You'd better stay back," said Kylie. "We're investigating an ectoplasmic phenomenon."
"Oh," Wanda said disinterestedly. "You should come by the Star Bright coffee house sometime and tell me more about it."
"I," said Eduardo, leaning casually against the tree just behind him, "would love to."
"You, Mr. Smooth," said Garrett. "Mind not leaning on the victim?"
"Huh?" Eduardo moved quickly away from the tree.
"Oh," said Wanda, "almost forgot - there's a frat party tonight," and she handed Kylie a flyer advertising the specified event.
"I'm free," Eduardo jumped in.
Celine scowled at him. "Who asked?"
"Thanks," said Kylie, "but I'm on assignment."
"Well then drop by the coffee house later," said Wanda. "We're doing a late shift after the party."
She and her friends then sloped off, leaving the four Ghostbusters to their tree problem.
"Do you still think she digs you?" asked Kylie, looking at Eduardo.
"Do you care?" he retorted.
Kylie shrugged wordlessly, and returned her attention to her PKE meter.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
Once the team was back at the firehouse, Egon was eager to look at the sample of sap they had brought him from Chip. He spent some time examining it under a microscope, and then punched some data into his computer.
"Here's the analysis of the ectoplasmic residue from Chip," he told Roland and Garrett, indicating the diagram on his computer screen. "And here's the spectral analysis from Tina."
"Same reading," said Roland. "Same ghost."
"So why's it picking on college kids?" asked Garrett.
Egon looked thoughtful. "Hmm…"
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
Eduardo, meanwhile, had decided to stay downstairs, and was sitting at the reception desk airing his problems while Janine busied herself with a filing cabinet behind him.
"And she's a total fox," Eduardo was saying. "She doesn't even know I'm alive."
Janine picked up another file and sighed heavily. "Believe me, I know it's hard. Day after day, you try and try, and get nothing back" - she slammed the file drawer shut, not noticing that Slimer was nosing around in it - "but, you have to hang in there, even if your insides feel like they've been" - she tore a reasonably thick file of papers clean in half - "ripped to threads."
Slimer crawled free of the file drawer, groaning and looking dazed.
"So," said Janine, tearing the papers into increasingly smaller pieces, "even if it takes twelve whole years, the best twelve years of a woman's life, in the end it'll all be worth it."
She finished tearing up the file, took a deep breath, and then noticed that Eduardo was staring at her in amazement. After a few seconds had elapsed he stood up and said, "I think I'm gonna take a walk now."
Slimer nodded his agreement, and zoomed off in a random direction, but Janine grabbed Eduardo's sleeve before he could go.
"Eduardo, wait," she said. "I'm sorry. Look… are you sure it's this Wanda you're really telling me about?"
Eduardo scowled slightly. "Of course it is."
"Well it sounds to me like she's not a very nice person."
"Yeah, well… there's probably more to her than meets the eye."
"Look," said Janine, "if you're trying to make someone jealous…"
"Janine!"
"I don't think it'll work. She's just some pretty girl who caught your eye - so what?"
"Janine," said Eduardo. "I can't wait around forever. And she's… I like her."
Janine raised her eyebrows. "Yeah?"
"Yeah."
"Yeah, well, I guess you're young - there's plenty of time to change your mind. So go get her, if that's really what you think you want."
At last, she let go of his sleeve. Eduardo hesitated a moment, and then headed for the exit.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
Kylie had evidently gone off to do a little research of her own. She now entered Egon's lab, holding an open book in her hands, and said, "I got a lead on our perp. I think it's this being called Surnunos. First off, he needs a human conduit to channel his energy. Someone's gotta actually summon him."
"Fascinating," said Egon. "That would account for the indirect ecto source."
"And then," said Kylie, "there's his M.O.: transmutations."
"That would account for Tina the troll and Chip… off the old block," said Garrett, apparently running a little dry on wit, for once in a way.
"But who would have summoned him?" asked Roland. "And why?"
Kylie produced a flyer from somewhere about her person - the flyer advertising the frat party Wanda was so keen on - and said, "Let's just say I got a hunch."
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
"Hey." Eduardo, sitting alone at the bar in the Star Bright coffee house, caught the attention of a middle-aged waitress. "Is Wanda in yet?"
"She was supposed to be here ten minutes ago," the waitress said irritably.
"I'll wait," said Eduardo.
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
Kylie, Garrett and Roland cautiously entered the fraternity house, proton guns poised.
"Awful quiet for a party," said Kylie.
They ventured further inside, following the PKE trail to another door. Garrett turned his chair round and slammed the back of it into the door, which opened without protest.
"Where is everybody?" asked Roland.
"You sure we have the right address?" added Garrett.
Kylie nodded. "I'm sure. Only I think someone beat us here."
An anguished squeaking sound caught their attention. Looking around, they noticed that one corner of the room was crawling with rats.
"Mm," said Garrett. "Not your usual frat rats."
"PKE is hot," said Roland. "Same reading as Tina and Chip."
It was a bit difficult to know what to do next - but at that moment another door burst open and Wanda, Celine and Bess entered. But they didn't come in on foot. They were levitating, their feet dangling inches above the ground.
"They wouldn't let us in," Wanda said sinisterly, as she and her two friends advanced upon the three Ghostbusters. "So they had to be punished."
"What do you say, Kylie?" asked Celine. "Ready to join the fun?"
Kylie, with her proton pistol poised, exclaimed angrily, "Surnunos is only using you! He's dangerous!"
"Look," said Garrett, also poised to shoot, "we don't want to hurt you, but we'll do whatever it takes to stop him."
"Stop this, roller boy," sneered Wanda, and her eyes glowed with silver lightning. She shot this directly at Garrett, sending him reeling back with a cry of pain and alarm.
"I'm warning you," said Roland. "Stay back!"
With these words, he let out a stream of proton fire from his gun. Bess, Wanda and Celine all floated quickly out of its path, and then Wanda sent Roland crashing to the floor with another bout of lightning from her eyes. Kylie got ready to take up the attack, but Wanda swung a lightning gaze onto her proton pistol and blasted it from her hands.
"Last chance, Kylie," she said. "Come with us. The power can be yours."
Kylie shook her head desperately. "You don't understand, Wanda. You can't trust Surnunos!"
Wanda scowled at her. "Come on, girls," she said tartly. "Kylie's not worthy. We'll just have to find someone else."
Wanda and Celine, still floating in midair, turned round and headed for the exit. Bess looked reluctant for a moment, but quickly followed. Kylie made to go after them, but Wanda turned in the doorway to reveal that there was fire in her eyes, which she threw into Kylie's path. The flames spread unnaturally fast, leaving Kylie still with an exit behind her, but blocking her path to the trio of witches.
Kylie turned round, gazed down at Roland and Garrett's unconscious forms, and then turned a wearied look onto the party of anguished brown rats.
"I don't suppose any o' you big, strong frat guys wanna help me carry my buddies out to the car?"
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
"Why am I wasting my time?" muttered Eduardo, making to stand up, but then voices coming from the stairway entrance caught his attention.
"Quit whining, Bess," said Wanda, appearing with her two friends at the bottom of the stairs.
"I still think we should talk to Kylie," argued Bess. "She may know something about Surnunos that we don't."
"Wanda?" said Eduardo, smiling and waving as Wanda turned her head.
"Ugh," muttered Wanda, turning back towards the stairs. "I'm outta here."
"Wait, not so fast," said Celine. "Surnunos said we needed a fourth."
Wanda raised her eyebrows, catching on straightaway. "And as a Ghostbuster," she said, "he must be a believer."
"But," said Bess, "he's a guy."
"Nobody's perfect," said Wanda, giving a subtle little tribute to Some Like It Hot, and approached Eduardo with a sickly smile on her face. "Eduardo. I'm so glad you came."
"Really?" asked Eduardo, sounding faintly surprised.
"You're free, right?" Wanda went on. "You're not booked up for the evening?"
"No!" said Eduardo, perhaps a little too quickly. "My schedule is wide open. So. Whadda you got in mind?"
Wanda laughed suggestively, and began walking back towards the staircase that led up to the street outside. Celine followed her up, with Eduardo hot on her heels.
"Hey, Bess!" Celine called down. "You coming?"
"Hey…" said Bess, grabbing Eduardo's sleeve and pulling him back down.
Eduardo raised his eyebrows. "Are you ok?"
Bess sighed heavily. "Oh, I don't know. Just maybe… maybe you shouldn't."
"What?" Eduardo frowned slightly. "Why not?"
"You're a friend of Kylie's, aren't you? Do you happen to know anything about a being called - "
"Hey, Casanova!" Celine's abrasive tones called down the stairs. "You wanna take a shot at this woman or what?"
Bess sighed again and, dropping her gaze, said quietly, "Do you?"
"You're not ok, are you?"
"Come on," said Bess, beginning to ascend the stairs. "Let's go."
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
Eduardo found himself standing on a roof in the middle of a lightning storm with these three slightly eccentric women. Looking dubiously at the sky, he said, "The ambience is a little lacking, but I gotta say I like the view."
Neither Wanda, Celine nor Bess answered him. Instead they sat down in a circle, and Wanda said coldly to Eduardo, "Sit."
"Don't you have to say Simon says first?" Eduardo said dryly, but then saw that Wanda was in no mood for jokes, and so sat down to complete the circle.
"Join hands," ordered Wanda.
Eduardo looked at Celine, and said, "Ok, after a couple of minutes, you wanna make yourself scarce so Wanda and I can - "
"Shut." Celine smacked Eduardo on the forehead. "Up."
The lightning increased in strength and volume, and dark clouds began to swirl above their heads. Looking up, beginning to panic now, Eduardo said desperately, "Maybe we could play Twister instead."
Wanda and Celine each grabbed one of his hands, and a shock of electricity went through them all.
"Ow!" exclaimed Eduardo. "What is this, some kind o' joke?"
"You found a fourth believer!" cried Surnunos, appearing in the air above them. "The circle is now complete."
"Hey, who invited the Wizard of Oz?" Eduardo said frantically.
"The power is ours!" proclaimed Wanda, releasing her hands from the circle and raising her arms in triumph.
"O contraire, my dear," Surnunos said gravely. "The power is mine. You have brought me into your world, and now" - his face began to change from grey to an obtrusive orange as it transformed into the visage of a monster - "you will serve me."
Eduardo watched in open-mouthed horror as Surnunos turned his power onto each of the three women in turn. He transformed Bess into a troll exactly like the one Tina had become; Celine's body became that of a tree, and Wanda was turned into an oversized brown rat.
"Ewwwww!" exclaimed Eduardo, reeling back.
"Let the punishment fit the crime," intoned Surnunos.
"Ah - I'm outta here!" cried Eduardo.
Surnunos turned as Eduardo sprinted away, and sent a few bolts of lightning after him, but quickly lost interest when the running figure disappeared inside the building. Instead of taking pot-shots at the absent member of his circle, Surnunos turned his attention to the city below and all around him, cackling madly.
"Let this world bow before the might of Surnunos," he said grandly, as thunder and lightning continued to crash above his head, and above New York City.
To be continued...
