Disclaimer: I own nothing- all charactors belong to NCIS and creators. I write for fun

A retake of the episode Judgement Day, Jenny took out all of the targets- including the woman. Her team copes with the inevitable and remembers a leader. A look at the past, probably a 2 shot

As the day wore on the shock wore off. Reality settled heavily over the agency as they pushed on. Each person coping in their own way.

The death of a woman so controversial would resonate throughout the agency and the Navy. Jennifer Shepard had been good at a job that called for hits, hard decisions and leadership. Under the pressure she had excelled, silently raising the bar and building the reputation of NCIS. That act had been a battle that had often highlighted her own faults and mistakes.

But Jenny Shepard had been Navy by career, worked four years and made the Navy send her to college. Then she had come back in NCIS and worked her way from a probie to director.

She had worked with many people, taken assignments that had affected many lives. She had served her country with pride and loyalty. Yet the woman and mother had been in her even if she had spent her life hanging tough. Those around her knew the truth, the woman who truly cared for those under her, who had lived and fought hard.

Today they mourned, trying to accept the truth. Even though the truth was a past mistake had come back to bite hard. The truth was Jenny Shepard had gone down protecting and fighting. That would never be known by any other than one team. The agency would cover it up and all would be expected to live with that lie.

For the main team, the one that knew and may have given the past director the most grief, that was not enough. Each sought a way to cope, a peace they could not feel as they thought of their leader.

o0o

The case was closed, the work was done; now he had to face it. For once his paperwork was caught up and he did not want to leave; his boat held no pull.

She was still here, a thread of the woman he had known so well. The one he had loved, possibly the only one he had truly loved since Shannon, the one he had allowed to leave. He was not sure he could go to say goodbye.

He wanted to see her but he did not want to see her in Ducky's cooler, it was not how she would have wanted to be seen. But he knew her, and he knew the agency, her casket would be closed; no one was ever to see her again.

Slowly he hauled himself up from his desk, glancing towards the upper level. She had often stood there to watch the bull pen before disappearing into her office or off to MTAC. She was not there, Jenny Shepard would never be there again. Sadly he turned towards the elevator.

o0o

Silently he sat on the bench. This had been his meeting place when the director had put him on assignment and the intel was not appropriate for the office. They had met here , he had come here with Joan to; he had not been here for several months.

His mind was active, had been since he had entered that diner almost two days ago. Five bodies, four enemies and one friend. The look on Gibb's face as he looked at the other woman on the floor he knew something was wrong.

As time wore on he learned the truth, her first op; first assassination. She had not been able to face it and it had come back to take not only her but the entire team; Jenny had ended it. Two members of a team of three dead, the last member protected in Jenny's dieing moments; her boss and lover.

Tony felt his own guilt, just as he knew they all did. Then there was the loss and still there was curiosity. Director Jennifer Shepard had been the first female director, she had been reputed as a feared and respected agent, assassin and investigator.

The steps of her career though were not common record due to the nature of some ops; all were topics of great speculations. Yet there was more to her than her career, she was driven and compassionate. Succeeding in a male dominant career. But she was distant, seniority had dictated a respect level that made it difficult to ask how she had gotten there.

Still he worked with the one man who might know. He very much wanted to know. Tony reached for his phone and hesitated before dialling the familiar numbers.

o0o

Prepping his type writer he settled in to begin a new novel, one he was sure he could write and finish. A novel dedicated to a brave woman.

Free writing was how how started, he needed to do his research. There were many things he needed to learn for the back story of his main character.

He had heard the plan to cover how the director died. The plan was an accident, the most common cover up in the agencies. But not fair, that was not how a hero deserved to be honoured, not how she should be laid to rest.

Tim McGee planned to write the truth, though he would weave it into fiction; it would be in honour of Jenny Shepard. He would learn the back story of her career and twist it together with the final case.

'Judgement Day' was the title he picked, it held a truth in to many ways. As a woman who had lived bravely and honourable was being wiped away by those who should be telling of the life she had lived were fabricating a death.

His fingers tapped freely, suddenly interrupted by the shrill ringing of his phone.

o0o

She lay on her stomach, a stack of old notebooks in front of her. Notes and memories she was not supposed to have.

Yet today she was glad she did. Ziva was very sure that she no longer belonged to Mossad. She was happiest here in America and with NCIS.

Lifting the top half of the pile off she began flipping through. It had been more than six years. She had been with NCIS for just under three and had met Jenny in Cairo originally and worked a three month op before they parted ways. Almost a year later they met again in Portugal and crossed most of Europe tracking a terrorist cell.

Even though some of that time was off duty Mossad method was no trace, notes or photos survived after a op was finished. Yet that had been a rule Ziva had routinely broken; the background she kept had proved useful.

So had the connections she had made, over the years those connections had been pivotal in investigations since then. Those connections were more like friends, she had memories with each of those people. Some she was closer to than others.

She had been close to Jenny, they had spent a lot of time together, mainly travelling. They had worked Cairo and knew each other a little by the time they hooked up again; Europe had been more fun. She had gotten to know the NCIS agent well.

They had had good times, laughs and fun together. Driving through beautiful countryside and old cities they had taken some pictures. She had stored those photos with her notes on the ops and had not thought to look back at them until now.

When she needed to remember the woman who had pushed men out of the way with confidence and had not been afraid to get down and dirty. Finding the right book she smiled as tears welled in her eyes. The top photo was one of her and Jenny, she was relaxed across the back seat and Jenny flopped back half on top of her; holding the camera out to get the shot. They had teased then about how they were acting like teenagers.

Flipping through more memories flooded back, fun ones and scary ones; they had had each others backs in those times. Still there were periods before and after that she didn't know, but she did know something in Jenny's life had made her tough enough to take it all on.

Setting the photos on the bed she flipped through the notebook, finding a note Jen had left in the end; she had originally found it on the plane back to Israel when they parted. It had only been a few months later that she had started feeding intel to NCIS through Jenny. The day her job had been confirmed they had met again; Ziva had been hunting Ari.

Once Ari had been laid to rest Jen called again; offering her a chance to get out. To get away from her father and to have a better life. The director of NCIS had given her a way to be human, to stop killing and live a life. She had even bunked with her for a week until finding an apartment. Ziva was about to read through that note again when her phone rang.

o0o

She hadn't been able to stay, she had finished her work and left. Gibbs had kept her steadily supplied with caffeine and the buzz was finally wearing off; her heart was breaking. First Kate and now the Director, it was unfair. The women she worked with all died, she hated death.

When Kate had died she had almost quit, she didn't want to go through it again. Jenny had not be as close to her as Kate had but the Director was special. She knew she wasn't the only one hurting, Gibbs had to be too; she knew he loved her.

Finally Abby found her way to somewhere familiar, a place she had been many times before. She had been there after Kate died too, it was her secret. Stepping through the door she waved to the receptionist and chose a book from the shelf.

The director was classy but tough, she had to find something to suit. Kate it had been a flower, a black rose on her right hip. It was fitting, the rose was beautiful but dark, Kate had been beautiful but her life cut short by a dark death; it also spoke to the secret side of Kate.

For Jennifer Shepard it was something different. The director was her leader and in a way her mother; the way she and Gibbs argued it was like having parents. Jenny was like a cat, sleek and aloof yet protective and loyal. Maybe a long haired one. She could have it done on her other hip.

Impulsive as some of her tattoos were she treasured all of them and as she chose the design she knew this was one that would not change that tally. Her artist had just started the needle when her phone buzzed with a text; in four hours she had a meeting.

o0o

For a long time he had simply stood over her body, not quite able to bring himself to move her from the bag to the table. It was not right and yet he knew it was better; he was the only one who truly knew. IT was better that she went like this than died slowly, loosing her dignity and giving up her pride.

Still she had been his friend and he did not like the idea of violating her. He knew her cause of death, it was very obvious and yet an autopsy was necessary. Donald Mallard knew though that it needed to be done and for the sake of her memory no one else needed to see. With that in mind he had dismissed Mr Palmer early; deciding to do it himself.

He knew parts of it would be a challenge and he had been right but now in retrospect as he prepared to put her to rest he felt a little bit of peace. There were many people who had seen Jenny as a woman, an agent and a leader but they had only seen her; not known her. He had been granted that privilege and for that he was grateful.

Now as he pulled the sheet up over her head he only hoped that her team and those who she had helped would honour her memory. As he shut the cooler he felt sad, her friend was there and he was leaving. Slowly he gathered his things preparing to leave.

Finally he headed for the elevator, surprised to see it already on its way down. When the doors opened he saw his old friend; realizing he had better just keep going. Gibbs hurried past him, disappearing into autopsy.

As he stepped out of the agency his cell phone began to ring; he glanced down at the number. When he answered it he was surprised by the strain in his friend's voice but pleased by the strange question. Instead of heading his car for home he took a different route towards a apartment he knew well.

o0o

He stood in autopsy for a long time, he knew where she was and yet he could not quite bring himself to see her. When he stepped forward he managed to grip the handle and pull enough to disengage the latch; it took a deep breath to pull out the rack.

A white sheet was pulled over her, gently he reached out a hand, letting it rest gently on her head; smoothing it back. Finally able to grip the sheet in his hand he dragged it back. Bringing it down far enough to show the top of the y incision Ducky had made for his autopsy.

A sigh racked his body, had he not pulled it down so far she would have looked like she were sleeping. Folding it neatly over her he took in her features one last time. High cheek bones, contoured jaw; soft lips. Truths he knew, much deeper, things he could no longer see. Slowly he looked down, the harsh stitches giving a neat cut a jagged appearance, the an entry wound just below her shoulder.

Ducky had cleaned it up, the hole seemed so small, yet he knew the damage that had been inflicted; it had been the kill shot.

In the silence of the room he felt he was able to say good bye to her, she was at rest now. She no longer had to fight to prove herself, the rat race was over for her. She was at peace, and he had seen all those responsible for her death put on slabs.

It would be better when she was buried, she did not deserve to lie in the cooler with the occupants he and Mike had arranged for her to share it with. She deserved her flag, her medals; to be buried in her Navy dress. She had served her country before joining NCIS, it was one of the things few people knew.

There were lots of things about her only a few people knew, only a few people had cared to know. His phone beeped, Abby's name came up when he lifted it to his ear her request made him smile; there were a few who wanted to know more.

Feedback please? Need to know if this one should stay alive.