Summary: DayumThoseLegs: FOR THE LAST TIME.
DayumThoseLegs: I! AM! NOT! A! CAT!

PancakePrince: DENY IT ALL YOU WANT I HAVE PICTURE EVIDENCE

Note: lookit yet ANOTHER chatfic. Impulse control? What's that?

Basically an AU where Akechi and Akira grew up together, and Akira ended up going into the Metaverse with Akechi two years prior.

Alt title: "Sin Unleashed 2.0"

Warnings: Suggestive Content, Implied/Referenced Sexual Content, Crack, Sudden Mood Whiplashes, Zero Regrets, Cheesy Love Confessions, A Strip Tease Or Two, Mentions Of Mara.

Disclaimer: Don't own P5.

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PancakePrince: I heard about the probation.
PancakePrince: and I CAN'T FUCKING BELIEVE
PancakePrince: I didn't raise an ingrate who would get CAUGHT assaulting a politician!

DayumThoseLegs: one
DayumThoseLegs: I didn't assault him. I pushed him off the woman HE was assaulting and he was so drunk he fell over by himself
DayumThoseLegs: and two
DayumThoseLegs: I can't believe you're on about how I GOT CAUGHT
DayumThoseLegs: and not about the ASSAULT
DayumThoseLegs: and three
DayumThoseLegs: you didn't raise me

PancakePrince: whatever makes you sleep at night.

DayumThoseLegs: definitely not your lovely visage then ;3

PancakePrince: I hate you.

DayumThoseLegs: I love you too honey

PancakePrince: one day you're going to die.
PancakePrince: it's going to be slow and brutal.
PancakePrince: and by my hand.

DayumThoseLegs: kinky

.

PancakePrince: so, how was your first day at your new school?

DayumThoseLegs: terrible

PancakePrince: oh?
PancakePrince: were your legs ogled all day long by virtual strangers, then?

DayumThoseLegs: I WISH it was that simple
DayumThoseLegs: for one thing
DayumThoseLegs: I'm laying low so I don't get to wear the girl's uniform
DayumThoseLegs: for another
DayumThoseLegs: it seems that my record was leaked
DayumThoseLegs: so now everyone at school is now gossiping about me
DayumThoseLegs: didn't you know?
DayumThoseLegs: I apparently can kill with just a look

PancakePrince: can confirm.
PancakePrince: remember Sanada from middle school?
PancakePrince: you terrified the shit out of him with your glare.
PancakePrince: he was never seen with you in the same room ever again.
PancakePrince: and that was when you were a fluff ball at fourteen.
PancakePrince: can you imagine how it is now two years later?

DayumThoseLegs: excuse you
DayumThoseLegs: Sanada was an asshole
DayumThoseLegs: he totally deserved it
DayumThoseLegs: he should be glad I didn't do worse

PancakePrince: he wasn't worth it.
PancakePrince: anyway.
PancakePrince: continue about your day.

DayumThoseLegs: okay so
DayumThoseLegs: I may or may not have accidentally travelled into the Metaverse
DayumThoseLegs: while accidentally taking someone from Shujin with me

PancakePrince: WHAT
PancakePrince: AMAMIYA-KURUSU AKIRA

DayumThoseLegs: oops
DayumThoseLegs: sorry gotta go
DayumThoseLegs: talk later

PancakePrince: DON'T YOU DARE

.

DayumThoseLegs sent lookatmynewroommate. jpg

DayumThoseLegs: isn't he cute?
DayumThoseLegs: goro?
DayumThoseLegs: hey goro?
DayumThoseLegs: honey?
DayumThoseLegs: sweetheart?
DayumThoseLegs: honeybun?
DayumThoseLegs: sugarplum?
DayumThoseLegs: sweetcheeks?
DayumThoseLegs: maple syrup?
DayumThoseLegs: PANCAKES

PancakePrince: what do you want?

DayumThoseLegs: well screw you!
DayumThoseLegs: you only listen to the pancakes?!
DayumThoseLegs: what am I?
DayumThoseLegs: chopped liver?
DayumThoseLegs: crushed human paste stuck to the floor?

PancakePrince: soon you will be.

DayumThoseLegs: excuse you?
DayumThoseLegs: you're still pissed off about that?

PancakePrince: of COURSE I'm still
PancakePrince: 'pissed off' about it!
PancakePrince: the Metaverse isn't somewhere you can drag anyone into!

DayumThoseLegs: you think I WANTED to do it?
DayumThoseLegs: I didn't even notice I was transported to the Metaverse until I was in front of the school
DayumThoseLegs: and it WASN'T school

PancakePrince: ah shit.
PancakePrince: a Palace?

DayumThoseLegs: YES

PancakePrince: whose? Do you know?

DayumThoseLegs: the asshole PE teacher and volleyball team coach
DayumThoseLegs: he's abusing his team and no one is saying anything about it
DayumThoseLegs: not even the victims themselves
DayumThoseLegs: he's also probably harassing female students too

PancakePrince: well fuck

DayumThoseLegs: well fuck, indeed

PancakePrince: what are you going to do about it?
PancakePrince: because I have a feeling that you're planning something

DayumThoseLegs: well…
DayumThoseLegs: see my cute, adorable new roommate in the pic?

PancakePrince: your long-lost sibling?

DayumThoseLegs: FOR THE LAST TIME.
DayumThoseLegs: I! AM! NOT! A! CAT!

PancakePrince: DENY IT ALL YOU WANT I HAVE PICTURE EVIDENCE

DayumThoseLegs: MOVING ON
DayumThoseLegs: my new roommate
DayumThoseLegs: his name is Morgana by the way
DayumThoseLegs: has a way to deal with the asshole teacher

PancakePrince: oh?

DayumThoseLegs: so, the Palace rulers?
DayumThoseLegs: they have a 'Treasure'
DayumThoseLegs: which is the root of their 'distorted desires'
DayumThoseLegs: which are the cause behind the Palace forming
DayumThoseLegs: and taking it will cause the Palace to disappear
DayumThoseLegs: along with the 'distortion'
DayumThoseLegs: which will cause the ruler of the Palace to see how things truly are
DayumThoseLegs: and so repent
DayumThoseLegs: it's… a bit risky, though
DayumThoseLegs: as the person whose Treasure would be stolen stands the chance of shutting down and dying

PancakePrince: I don't like the sound of that.
PancakePrince: it sounds like brainwashing.
PancakePrince: with the risk of causing a mental shutdown.

DayumThoseLegs: it's the only way I have to deal with this guy at the moment.

PancakePrince: WHY do you have to deal with him anyway?
PancakePrince: don't tell me…
PancakePrince: you've grown attached, haven't you?

DayumThoseLegs: HOWEVER DID YOU GUESS

PancakePrince: but still…
PancakePrince: what you told me just gave me an idea.
PancakePrince: about the mental shutdown cases.

DayumThoseLegs: you think someone is causing them via the Metaverse?

PancakePrince: it seems so.
PancakePrince: someone stealing Treasures, possibly.
PancakePrince: or maybe it's something to do with a person's Shadow self too.
PancakePrince: remember the rampaging incident?

DayumThoseLegs: how can I forget?
DayumThoseLegs: wait a moment
DayumThoseLegs: let me ask Morgana
DayumThoseLegs: yep
DayumThoseLegs: it looks like you should also be looking into someone KILLING Shadow selves

PancakePrince: that cat is quite helpful.
PancakePrince: how does it even give you information?

DayumThoseLegs: he talks

PancakePrince: he TALKS?
PancakePrince: you keep a TALKING CAT with you in your room?

DayumThoseLegs: only those who've been in the Metaverse can hear what he says though
DayumThoseLegs: the rest just hear meowing

PancakePrince: that's convenient.

DayumThoseLegs: I told him about you

PancakePrince: what do you mean?

DayumThoseLegs: I mean
DayumThoseLegs: I told him about 'I've been going to the Metaverse for more than two years now'
DayumThoseLegs: and about 'I have a friend who goes with me too but he's too busy now'

PancakePrince: why?

DayumThoseLegs: I've been with him through the Palace twice

PancakePrince: and he noticed your experience?
PancakePrince: and you valued his help.
PancakePrince: or at least, not having him be an enemy.
PancakePrince: I see.
PancakePrince: That makes sense.

.

DayumThoseLegs: I'm going through with it.

PancakePrince: what?
PancakePrince: the thing about the Treasure, you mean?
PancakePrince: but isn't that too risky?
PancakePrince: Akira?
PancakePrince: I know you're reading these messages.
PancakePrince: AKIRA YOU'RE SUCH A CAT.
PancakePrince: I see.
PancakePrince: so it's that serious, huh?
PancakePrince: you better talk to me about this later.

DayumThoseLegs: I will.

.

DayumThoseLegs: man, I'm beat

PancakePrince: you took the Treasure?

DayumThoseLegs: yep
DayumThoseLegs: we still don't know how it went with the asshole
DayumThoseLegs: he's not showing up to school

PancakePrince: how did it go?

DayumThoseLegs: after we infiltrated the Palace and found where the Treasure was
DayumThoseLegs: we had to return and send a calling card

PancakePrince: WHY?

DayumThoseLegs: according to Morgana
DayumThoseLegs: it's a necessary step to make the ruler aware that they're hearts are something that could be stolen
DayumThoseLegs: the effect lasts for only a day though
DayumThoseLegs: and it's a onetime deal, so we don't get retries

PancakePrince: you're calling it heart now?

DayumThoseLegs: shrug

PancakePrince: alright, fine, never mind that. What was the Treasure?

DayumThoseLegs: in the Metaverse it was a crown
DayumThoseLegs: outside the Metaverse it took the form of a medal
DayumThoseLegs: a fake medal. It looks like one of the medals the asshole owns

PancakePrince: well… when will the change happen?

DayumThoseLegs: dunno
DayumThoseLegs: but I certainly hope it happens before the asshole makes true on his word and expels me

PancakePrince: WHAT
PancakePrince: YOU'VE BARELY BEEN THERE A MONTH
PancakePrince: AND YOU ALREADY GOT YOURSELF IN ENOUGH TROUBLE TO BE THREATENED WITH EXPULSION?

DayumThoseLegs: oops gotta go

PancakePrince: AKIRA!

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PancakePrince: so today I found a box containing pancakes on my doorstep
PancakePrince: it was most definitely not sent by mail.
PancakePrince: should I assume that the change of heart was a success then?
PancakePrince: and there would be no expulsion?

DayumThoseLegs: YOU ASSUME CORRECT

PancakePrince: that's good to hear.
PancakePrince: besides
PancakePrince: that means that you weren't killed.
PancakePrince: or worse.
PancakePrince: EXPELLED.

DayumThoseLegs: SKDHASGJSJASDGJASD
DayumThoseLegs: AKECHI FUCKING GORO
DayumThoseLegs: DID I JUST READ WHAT I JUST READ WITH MY OWN TWO EYES?

PancakePrince: I don't know what you're talking about.

DayumThoseLegs: oh come ON

PancakePrince: how are your kids?

DayumThoseLegs sent MYCHILDREN. jpg

DayumThoseLegs: MY KIDS
DayumThoseLegs: ARE FINE
DayumThoseLegs: CINNAMON ROLLS TOO GOOD FOR THIS WORLD TOO PURE
DayumThoseLegs: IM A PROUD PAPA
DayumThoseLegs: A PROUD PHANTOM THIEF PAPA

PancakePrince: excuse you did you just…
PancakePrince: say PHANTOM THIEF?
PancakePrince: OH MY GOD IS THIS WHAT I THINK IT IS?

DayumThoseLegs: my lovely fam consisting of myself and my three kids are now a group of phantom thieves~

PancakePrince: I KNEW THAT MAGIC KAITO ADDICTION WAS GOING TO BE BAD INFLUENCE

DayumThoseLegs: but detective~
DayumThoseLegs: you're not interested in some phantom thief/detective action?
DayumThoseLegs: ;3
DayumThoseLegs: FOREPLAY

PancakePrince: NO

DayumThoseLegs: YES

PancakePrince: GODDAMMIT AKIRA I SAID NO
PancakePrince: THERE WILL BE NO PHANTOM THIEF/DETECTIVE FOREPLAY

DayumThoseLegs: but darling
DayumThoseLegs: this phantom thief fam is your fam
DayumThoseLegs: and their papa is your bf
DayumThoseLegs: come to where I live
DayumThoseLegs: let me seduce you with my coffee

.

DayumThoseLegs: have you ever seen a guy so beautiful you cried?

PancakePrince: I have a mirror.

DayumThoseLegs:
DayumThoseLegs: I'm SPEECHLESS
DayumThoseLegs: okay
DayumThoseLegs: you're right but that's not what I'm talking about here

PancakePrince: it's not?
PancakePrince: have you finally grown bored of me?
PancakePrince: are you tossing me to the side
PancakePrince: to enjoy the company of a beautiful young thing?

DayumThoseLegs: honey
DayumThoseLegs: you'll always be number one in my heart
DayumThoseLegs: I love you
DayumThoseLegs: I'll never throw you away
DayumThoseLegs: I'll be sticking so close to you it will make YOU want to get rid of me

PancakePrince:
PancakePrince: I love you too
PancakePrince: no promises on never wanting to get rid of you
PancakePrince:
PancakePrince: …I miss you…

DayumThoseLegs: I miss you too
DayumThoseLegs: which reminds me
DayumThoseLegs: we're overdue for a date
DayumThoseLegs: it's been ages since we talked face to face
DayumThoseLegs: where would you like to go and when?
DayumThoseLegs: it's your call

PancakePrince: well…

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DayumThoseLegs sent LOOKATHIM. jpg

DayumThoseLegs: lookit my new kid

PancakePrince: I leave you alone for LESS THAN A WEEK
PancakePrince: I… am not even surprised anymore.

DayumThoseLegs: GASP
DayumThoseLegs: NOT SURPRISED?
DayumThoseLegs: HAVE I PERCHANCE LOST MY TOUCH?
DayumThoseLegs: CURSES!

PancakePrince: 'losing your touch'?

DayumThoseLegs: guess the news about having a new member join
DayumThoseLegs: having a new target
DayumThoseLegs: being threatened with legal action
DayumThoseLegs: (we may or may not be sued at the start of next month)
DayumThoseLegs: and being stalked by Niijima Makoto
DayumThoseLegs: won't shock you huh?

PancakePrince: WHAT
PancakePrince: AKIRA WHAT DID YOU DO
PancakePrince: OF COURSE I'LL BE SHOCKED!
PancakePrince: SOMEONE THREATENED YOU WITH LEGAL ACTION?
PancakePrince: YOU MAY BE SUED?
PancakePrince: I LEAVE YOU ALONE FOR A LITTLE BIT AND EVERYTHING GOES TO SHIT
PancakePrince: AMAMIYA-KURUSU AKIRA

DayumThoseLegs:
DayumThoseLegs: woah

PancakePrince: why is Niijima Makoto stalking you?

DayumThoseLegs: she may or may not be suspecting us

PancakePrince: do I need to mobilize?
PancakePrince: drive some Shujin kids into berserk rage to distract her?
PancakePrince: drive HER into berserk rage to distract her?
PancakePrince: also.
PancakePrince: WHO is threatening you with legal action? I need a NAME.

DayumThoseLegs: WOAH
DayumThoseLegs: Goro slow down
DayumThoseLegs: holy fuck what I wouldn't give to have you in front of me so that I can kiss you senseless
DayumThoseLegs: but I'll have to deal with just blowing you-

PancakePrince: AKIRA

DayumThoseLegs: -kisses across the chat ;3
DayumThoseLegs: my, what did you think I was going to do, detective?
DayumThoseLegs: were you thinking Naughty Thoughts? ;3
DayumThoseLegs: do you want me to send you nudes?
DayumThoseLegs: just say the word~

PancakePrince: NO

DayumThoseLegs: I can FEEL your blush

DayumThoseLegs sent youmissthoselegsdontyou. jpg

PancakePrince: SJKDHAKJSDHKAJSHDASGHDAJS

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DayumThoseLegs: I don't get how the public thinks you're some pure prince.
DayumThoseLegs: I would have never thought you'd be bold enough to whisk me into a corner in a TV STATION
DayumThoseLegs: to have your wicked way with me D:

PancakePrince: I have no idea what you're talking about.
PancakePrince: are you trying to besmirch my good name?
PancakePrince: I'll have you know I'm a perfect gentleman!

DayumThoseLegs: tell that to my sore neck littered with hickies

PancakePrince: you should cover those up then.
PancakePrince: don't want people staring ^^

DayumThoseLegs: it's already too late
DayumThoseLegs: my kids saw them
DayumThoseLegs: you better sleep with an eye open from now on

PancakePrince: oh? How bold… wicked thieves plotting to break and enter into a humble detective's home to torment him…

DayumThoseLegs: HUMBLE
DayumThoseLegs: sheesh
DayumThoseLegs: they all heard what you said about the phantom thieves…
DayumThoseLegs: did you have to do that? T^T

PancakePrince: who ate the last pancake again?

DayumThoseLegs: okay FINE!

PancakePrince: you mentioned once seducing me with your coffee?
PancakePrince: I think I'll take you up on that offer.

DayumThoseLegs: holy fuck
DayumThoseLegs: Akechi Goro you devious asshole
DayumThoseLegs: are you manipulating your way to coffee on my expense?

PancakePrince: AM I?

.

DayumThoseLegs: hey hon
DayumThoseLegs: can I seduce my way into your work cabinet?

PancakePrince: no.

DayumThoseLegs: but HONEY

PancakePrince: WHY do you want to seduce your way into my work?
PancakePrince: WHY do you HAVE to ASK ME ABOUT IT?
PancakePrince: you and I both know you'd seduce your way in either way, so why ask?
PancakePrince: don't tell me…
PancakePrince: it's PT business, isn't it?

DayumThoseLegs: I seem to be an appealing blackmail target

PancakePrince: you got blackmailed?! By who?

DayumThoseLegs: by none other than our dear student council president

PancakePrince: NIIJIMA MAKOTO BLACKMAILED YOU?
PancakePrince: HOW did that happen?
PancakePrince: (oh where are you Sae?)

DayumThoseLegs: now
DayumThoseLegs: takes off shirt
DayumThoseLegs: how many more articles of clothing do I have to take off before you tell me who the guy controlling shibuya and blackmailing high school students is?

PancakePrince: I don't know.
PancakePrince: I don't think I should get you involved…

DayumThoseLegs: unbuttons pants

DayumThoseLegs sent imreadywillingandable. jpg

DayumThoseLegs: next the zipper goes down

PancakePrince:
PancakePrince: I think…
PancakePrince: I think I can be persuaded.
PancakePrince: go on.

DayumThoseLegs: my
DayumThoseLegs: aren't we hot and bothered today
DayumThoseLegs: unzips pants

DayumThoseLegs sent icancontinueuntilyoucrack. jpg

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DayumThoseLegs: remember when I told you that I seem to be an appealing blackmail target?

PancakePrince: and then you proceeded to give me a strip tease by way of pictures.
PancakePrince: of course I remember.
PancakePrince: don't tell me that you got blackmailed again…

DayumThoseLegs: well…
DayumThoseLegs: when you put it that way…
DayumThoseLegs: then I don't think I have news to tell you sorry hon

PancakePrince: W
PancakePrince: H
PancakePrince: O
PancakePrince: G
PancakePrince: I
PancakePrince: V
PancakePrince: E
PancakePrince: M
PancakePrince: E
PancakePrince: A
PancakePrince: N
PancakePrince: A
PancakePrince: M
PancakePrince: E

DayumThoseLegs: you're totally pissed off right now…
DayumThoseLegs: is it even safe to tell you now?

PancakePrince: the power of Loki's berserk spell courses through me
PancakePrince: it's. just. A. name. tell. M. E.

DayumThoseLegs: uhhh
DayumThoseLegs: Kaneshiro

PancakePrince: 'kay thanks

DayumThoseLegs: Goro?
DayumThoseLegs: Goooorroooooo?
DayumThoseLegs: honey?
DayumThoseLegs: fuck.
DayumThoseLegs: me.
DayumThoseLegs: shit!
DayumThoseLegs: Goro no don't put murder on your record you have a whole life ahead of you D:

PancakePrince: :)

.

DayumThoseLegs: one thing I'm absolutely glad for
DayumThoseLegs: is that we were done with Kaneshiro quickly
DayumThoseLegs: I don't want to think what would have happened had we delayed…

PancakePrince: :(

DayumThoseLegs: don't give me that face
DayumThoseLegs: it was for your own good!
DayumThoseLegs: can you imagine what would have happened to you if I let you go kill Kaneshiro?!
DayumThoseLegs: I can't let my bf ruin his life for just a lil' tiny hitch I can take care of

PancakePrince: LIL'
PancakePrince: TINY
PancakePrince: HITCH?
PancakePrince: BITCH WHERE?
PancakePrince: YOU GOT YOURSELF BLACKMAILED BY A MAFIOSO!
PancakePrince: WHO KNOWS WHAT THINGS HE WOULD HAVE DONE TO YOU!
PancakePrince: what type of decent boyfriend would I be if I didn't threaten to murder the ones who harm you?

DayumThoseLegs: one with SELF-PRESERVATION INSTINCTS

PancakePrince: AHAHAHAHAHAHA
PancakePrince: SELF-PRESERVATION?
PancakePrince: WHAT'S THAT?

DayumThoseLegs: sweetheart
DayumThoseLegs: honeybun
DayumThoseLegs: light of my life
DayumThoseLegs: my heart and soul
DayumThoseLegs: please
DayumThoseLegs: please don't

PancakePrince:
PancakePrince: alright…

DayumThoseLegs: I love you Goro you know that right?

PancakePrince:
PancakePrince: I DO
PancakePrince: I KNOW that I swear
PancakePrince: and…
PancakePrince: I wonder…
PancakePrince: you know that I love you too, right?

DayumThoseLegs: I… I do

PancakePrince sent icantbelieveimdoingthis. jpg

PancakePrince: alright. I'm indulging in some silliness don't you dare not respond properly

DayumThoseLegs sent youresopreciousyouknowthat. jpg

DayumThoseLegs: to think I'd live to see the day you'd send me a picture of you doing half a heart with your hand
DayumThoseLegs: for me to complete it
DayumThoseLegs: there is hope for you yet :D

PancakePrince: noooooooo

.

PancakePrince: HOW do you do it?
PancakePrince: HOW do you keep getting into such situations?!
PancakePrince: you're probably not responding to your phone because you're out for the fireworks festival
PancakePrince: but please in the name of all that is holy
PancakePrince: and not holy
PancakePrince: please pick up your phone and see my messages because god knows I won't be able to call you right now
PancakePrince: holy shit Akira the hacktivist group Medjed just issued a challenge to the Phantom Thieves
PancakePrince: WHAT are you going to do?

DayumThoseLegs: bless you babe
DayumThoseLegs: as to what I'm going to do
DayumThoseLegs: well…
DayumThoseLegs: I still need to figure that one out

PancakePrince: I wish I could reach through the screen and strangle you
PancakePrince: except I don't want my appearance to get disheveled
PancakePrince: I have a TV interview in a few

DayumThoseLegs: have fun babe

PancakePrince: oh I'm definitely going to have fun
PancakePrince: by roasting you on TV
PancakePrince: I hope you like my interview ^^

.

PancakePrince: you went out for SUSHI and DIDN'T invite me along?
PancakePrince: I have the worst boyfriend ever.
PancakePrince: is this payback for the interview?

DayumThoseLegs: GEE I WONDER

PancakePrince: your levels of pettiness are astounding.

DayumThoseLegs: right back at you hon

PancakePrince: you know what else astounds me?
PancakePrince: how NO ONE figured out that you're the PT yet.
PancakePrince: you could put up a sign
PancakePrince: and it WON'T be flashier.

DayumThoseLegs: we are Phantom Thieves
DayumThoseLegs: we're MEANT to be flashy
DayumThoseLegs: it's all part of our style

PancakePrince: not when it's going to get you ARRESTED!
PancakePrince: moving on…
PancakePrince: what do you plan to do about the Medjed situation?

DayumThoseLegs: we'll figure something out.

PancakePrince: you won't be able to change their hearts.
PancakePrince: because you don't know WHO is behind Medjed…

DayumThoseLegs: we WILL find a way
DayumThoseLegs: don't worry

.

PancakePrince: I have no idea how you manage these things.
PancakePrince: I am ABSOLUTELY sure no one in your group can crack a phone's password
PancakePrince: let alone HACK MEDJED
PancakePrince: wait.
PancakePrince: don't tell me…
PancakePrince: you adopted someone new to the group?
PancakePrince: someone who happens to be a hacker?
PancakePrince: oh fuck
PancakePrince: a hacker
PancakePrince: just what you needed

DayumThoseLegs: be nice to my new kid
DayumThoseLegs: hacked into my phone I'll have you know
DayumThoseLegs: probably reading our messages as we speak

PancakePrince: the PICTURES

DayumThoseLegs: yeah?
DayumThoseLegs: I've been roasted and kinkshamed
DayumThoseLegs: you're next I'm sure

PancakePrince: Akira?

DayumThoseLegs: yeah babe?

PancakePrince: I just got messages from someone calling themself Aliababa
PancakePrince: they're kinkshaming me as we speak
PancakePrince: that's your hacker?

DayumThoseLegs: the younger sibling I've never thought I'd have :D

PancakePrince: why am I not surprised?

.

PancakePrince: one regret I have in life
PancakePrince: is not going to Leblanc sooner.

DayumThoseLegs: you enjoyed hearing me be roasted didn't you?

PancakePrince: I'm sorry sweetheart
PancakePrince: I'm afraid we'll have to break up
PancakePrince: I don't think I can love you anymore
PancakePrince: Boss' coffee stole my heart and soul

DayumThoseLegs: YOU WEAKLING
DayumThoseLegs: YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE THE GUTS TO SUGGEST A POLYAMOROUS RELATIONSHIP
DayumThoseLegs: AND WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING
DayumThoseLegs: HOGGING BOSS' COFFEE ALL TO YOURSELF?!
DayumThoseLegs: I'm ready to throw down
DayumThoseLegs: I'll defeat you for the sake of the coffee

PancakePrince: oh?
PancakePrince: meet me at the Path of Aiyatsbus. Bring Arsene.
PancakePrince: we're going to fight it out.

DayumThoseLegs: ehehehehe
DayumThoseLegs: but hon
DayumThoseLegs: you know you're Weak to Curse ;3

PancakePrince: and you're Weak to Bless, so we're even :)
PancakePrince: bring it on

.

DayumThoseLegs sent aloha. jpg

DayumThoseLegs: guess who's back from Hawaii?

PancakePrince: my pancakes?

DayumThoseLegs: yes your pancakes
DayumThoseLegs: WRONG
DayumThoseLegs: ITS YOUR SEXY HOT BF
DayumThoseLegs: who else could it be?
DayumThoseLegs: I'd ask if you hooked up with Sae while I was in Hawaii
DayumThoseLegs: but you're too gay for that
DayumThoseLegs: and she's too gay for that
DayumThoseLegs: and Futaba sent me updates about you
DayumThoseLegs: sexting? Naughty, naughty :3

PancakePrince: you should know
PancakePrince: your ear is the one I've whispered pure filth into

DayumThoseLegs sent yourealreadygettingmehotandbotheredagain. jpg

PancakePrince: while you look absolutely delicious
PancakePrince: neither of us has the time for me to spread you open over Leblanc's counter

DayumThoseLegs: akjsdhkaajksdhasd

PancakePrince: besides, I don't think Boss would approve.

DayumThoseLegs: AKJSDHAKSDGASD THAT'S WHATS STOPPING YOU?
DayumThoseLegs: FUCKING HELL GORO
DayumThoseLegs: FUCK. ME. MY BF IS A SINNAMON ROLL TOO HOT FOR THIS WORLD TOO FILTHY

PancakePrince: I'D DO IT BUT WE DON'T HAVE TIME
PancakePrince: anyway.
PancakePrince: what are you going to do about Okumura?
PancakePrince: the masses are clamoring to have his heart changed
PancakePrince: what will your response be?

DayumThoseLegs: HOW do you even bounce through moods like that?
DayumThoseLegs: to answer your question
DayumThoseLegs: we're going to do it

PancakePrince: seriously?!
PancakePrince: you're going to be doing the public's whims now?!
PancakePrince: oh for fuck's sake
PancakePrince: don't tell me the fame got to you
PancakePrince: I swear I'll sneak into your room in the middle of the night
PancakePrince: with a KNIFE
PancakePrince: and murder you

DayumThoseLegs: we have a REASON
DayumThoseLegs: Okumura? He's planning to sell his daughter off for a politician's son to curry favor
DayumThoseLegs: we're doing it for her

PancakePrince:
PancakePrince: well…
PancakePrince: I apologize for doubting you like that.
PancakePrince: I… know you better than that and I shouldn't have doubted you so, I'm sorry.

DayumThoseLegs: It's okay
DayumThoseLegs: it… was a bit of a difficult situation for us
DayumThoseLegs: we almost fought about it
DayumThoseLegs: initially, we weren't going to do it
DayumThoseLegs: but then we met Haru, Okumura's daughter, while she was out with her 'fiancé'
DayumThoseLegs: the situation escalated
DayumThoseLegs: and the next thing we heard was her father was planning to just give her away to the 'fiancé'
DayumThoseLegs: and that's why we decided to go through with it eventually

PancakePrince:
PancakePrince: you'll take care, alright?

DayumThoseLegs: yes
DayumThoseLegs: talk to you later, I love you

PancakePrince: I love you, too.

.

DayumThoseLegs: I can't believe you
DayumThoseLegs: I go back to Leblanc, find you there, and say
DayumThoseLegs: 'honey I'm home'
DayumThoseLegs: but you don't respond with
DayumThoseLegs: 'what would you like? Food, a shower, or me?'
DayumThoseLegs: ?
DayumThoseLegs: HONESTLY

PancakePrince: I know you
PancakePrince: and I know you'd say 'how about I feast upon you in the shower?' in response
PancakePrince: Boss was standing right THERE

DayumThoseLegs: I can't believe dad is cockblocking me
DayumThoseLegs: wait, I actually can

PancakePrince: so…
PancakePrince: do you want to talk about what happened with Okumura?

DayumThoseLegs: okay so
DayumThoseLegs: I KNOW there is a chance a mental shutdown could happen instead of a change of heart
DayumThoseLegs: but I must admit what happened with Okumura was unexpected
DayumThoseLegs: we did everything like we usually do
DayumThoseLegs: I'm… still trying to figure what could have been different with Okumura to cause the shutdown…

PancakePrince: there is something I've been thinking about.
PancakePrince: and I talked with your hacker about it.
PancakePrince: could it be possible that the shutdown was planned
PancakePrince: and your team was lured in to target Okumura
PancakePrince: so that you would be framed for the mental shutdowns?

DayumThoseLegs: it's highly possible
DayumThoseLegs: I'll need to hold a meeting soon
DayumThoseLegs: this is a topic I can't leave unaddressed

PancakePrince: I'll keep looking for more clues on my end.

DayumThoseLegs: take care, okay?
DayumThoseLegs: with Black Mask on the loose, and your Loki mask, I don't want you to be mixed up with them…

PancakePrince: I will.
PancakePrince: (Even though my Loki mask is technically closer to a very dark red rather than black…)
PancakePrince: I'll use my Robin Hood mask.
PancakePrince: There is no way I would be mistaken with Black Mask then.

DayumThoseLegs: are you sure you don't want me to join you on your information gathering trips?
DayumThoseLegs: I can bring Morgana along
DayumThoseLegs: he knows about you and would be a great help in covering larger distances
DayumThoseLegs: it would also help your case in case you ever decided to join the team

PancakePrince: I find it highly unlikely that I'll end up joining your band of merry thieves
PancakePrince: for more than one reason
PancakePrince: but alright
PancakePrince: I guess I can't refuse the offer of a ride

.

DayumThoseLegs: you know
DayumThoseLegs: your cognitive version in Sae's Palace is… very interesting
DayumThoseLegs: meeting him gave rise to even MORE interesting questions
DayumThoseLegs: about how Sae perceives our relationship

PancakePrince: okay so ONE
PancakePrince: WHAT is THAT supposed to mean?
PancakePrince: TWO
PancakePrince: WHY are you inside Sae's Palace?
PancakePrince: and THREE
PancakePrince: SAE HAS A PALACE?

DayumThoseLegs: yes she does
DayumThoseLegs: it's a casino

PancakePrince: A CASINO

DayumThoseLegs: we're there because we have been blackmailed AGAIN

PancakePrince: HOW AND WHY DO YOU KEEP BEING BLACKMAILED?
PancakePrince: WHO WAS IT THIS TIME?
PancakePrince: WHO DO I NEED TO KILL?

DayumThoseLegs: chill

PancakePrince: I CAN'T /CHILL/

DayumThoseLegs: your cognitive version saw me, squeaked, tripped, and fell down a staircase
DayumThoseLegs: he lived
DayumThoseLegs: but he was blushing like mad

PancakePrince: WHAT WHY HOW
PancakePrince: SAE WHY
PancakePrince: WHY
PancakePrince: IS THAT HOW SAE SEES ME?
PancakePrince: A BLUSHING MESS THAT CAN'T FUNCTION WHILE YOU'RE AROUND?

DayumThoseLegs: it's okay hon
DayumThoseLegs: no harm done

PancakePrince: no harm done?
PancakePrince: NO HARM DONE?!
PancakePrince: I can't let this slide!

DayumThoseLegs: well, it's not like you can change it

PancakePrince: :)
PancakePrince: :3
PancakePrince: ;3

DayumThoseLegs: I have a feeling that I'm going to regret this conversation

.

DayumThoseLegs: you're a horrible bf
DayumThoseLegs: we had to postpone our infiltration of Sae's Palace for another day for reasons you SHOULD KNOW
DayumThoseLegs: my ass is sore
DayumThoseLegs: zero regrets though
DayumThoseLegs: had no idea you were into COMPLETELY PUBLIC SEX

PancakePrince: did it do its job though?

DayumThoseLegs: introducing Akechi Goro, the guy who was so bothered by how his colleague perceived him he resorted to having sex in front of her just to change her mind
DayumThoseLegs: it depends on how you define 'did its job'

PancakePrince: and that means?

DayumThoseLegs: that means we had to fight Sae's cognition of you because he couldn't KEEP IT IN HIS FUCKING PANTS
DayumThoseLegs: he turned to Mara
DayumThoseLegs: babe
DayumThoseLegs: MARA
DayumThoseLegs: /MARA/
DayumThoseLegs: M
DayumThoseLegs: A
DayumThoseLegs: R
DayumThoseLegs: A
DayumThoseLegs: !

PancakePrince: kajsdasgdjasd
PancakePrince: WHAT
PancakePrince: WHY
PancakePrince: WHY IS THIS MY LIFE

DayumThoseLegs: your plan backfired spectacularly
DayumThoseLegs: probably the only person who benefitted was me
DayumThoseLegs: I GOT LAID
DayumThoseLegs: but you?
DayumThoseLegs: you unfortunate soul
DayumThoseLegs: Lack of Impulse Control, Thy Name is Akechi Goro

PancakePrince:
PancakePrince: I need to go
PancakePrince: jump into the arms of the Reaper
PancakePrince: I love you babe
PancakePrince: take care of Boss' coffee for me
PancakePrince: I'll haunt you, don't worry ^^

.

PancakePrince: Akira?
PancakePrince: Akira what is this I hear on the news about the leader of the Phantom Thieves of Hearts committing suicide while in custody?
PancakePrince: babe
PancakePrince: what is this I hear about the leader of the Phantom Thieves of Hearts being held in custody?
PancakePrince: I was in the same building for fuck's sake
PancakePrince: Akira it's been a day and I haven't heard anything from you
PancakePrince: respond for fuck's sake
PancakePrince: Akira?
PancakePrince: Akira please?
PancakePrince: kitten?
PancakePrince: love? Are you reading this?
PancakePrince:
PancakePrince: I see…
PancakePrince: so it came to this
PancakePrince: so you were caught
PancakePrince: killed?
PancakePrince: because you'd never kill yourself voluntarily like that
PancakePrince: you didn't EVEN SAY ANYTHING
PancakePrince: I KNOW THIS PHONE IS MOST LIKELY HELD AS EVIDENCE
PancakePrince: I KNOW THAT MEANS OUR CHAT LOGS HAVE BEEN READ
PancakePrince: I KNOW IT MEANS THAT MY MESSAGES ARE BEING READ AT THE MOMENT
PancakePrince: BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?
PancakePrince: FUCK YOU AKIRA
PancakePrince: FUCK YOU WITH A GUN
PancakePrince: YOU DON'T
PancakePrince: GET TO DO T
PancakePrince: HIS I
PancakePrince: DON'T CARE ANYMORE
PancakePrince: LET THEM COME AT ME
PancakePrince: LET THEM TRY
PancakePrince: I DON'T CARE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT
PancakePrince: YOU THINK I HAVENT BEEN DOING ANYTHING WHILE YOU WERE PLAYING THIEF?
PancakePrince: GUESS AGAIN
PancakePrince: I HAVE A LILST OF NAMES
PancakePrince: AND BY THIS TIME NEXT WEEK NONE OF THEM WO
PancakePrince: ULD BE DRAWING BREATH I
PancakePrince: WILL MAKE SHI
PancakePrince: DO REGRET
PancakePrince: AKI RA PL EASE I

DayumThoseLegs: Excuse me. This is Makoto.

PancakePrince: NII jima?

DayumThoseLegs: Yes.
DayumThoseLegs: Akira can't respond right now because he'd been confined to bed rest.
DayumThoseLegs: I'll be handling his messages at the moment.

PancakePrince: he's
PancakePrince: alive

DayumThoseLegs: Yes.

PancakePrince: he's
PancakePrince: alright?

DayumThoseLegs: I… am not sure.
DayumThoseLegs: He's been… hurt pretty badly.
DayumThoseLegs: Actually…
DayumThoseLegs: That's an understatement.
DayumThoseLegs: He let himself get caught in a ploy to smoke out the traitor who infiltrated us.
DayumThoseLegs: The interrogators weren't merciful. He was beaten black and blue.
DayumThoseLegs: And that's what I could see on his face.
DayumThoseLegs: He was limping too, and I think he has bruised ribs.
DayumThoseLegs: He was drugged as well.
DayumThoseLegs: I'm telling you this because both Boss and Futaba told me I could trust you with this information.
DayumThoseLegs: Even Morgana agreed.

PancakePrince:
PancakePrince: Alright…
PancakePrince: listen to me
PancakePrince: I am coming to Leblanc right now
PancakePrince: and we are going to plan for what's going to happen next
PancakePrince: there are details I need to speak to you all about in person

DayumThoseLegs: …alright…
DayumThoseLegs: We'll be waiting for you.

.

Extra:

PancakePrince: I forgot to ask
PancakePrince: how did you get into his phone?

DayumThoseLegs: um…
DayumThoseLegs: Everyone knows Akira's lockscreen password is '56fuckspancakes'
DayumThoseLegs: Pardon the language…

PancakePrince: THAT FUCKER
PancakePrince: SAY YOUR GOODBYES TO HIM RIGHT NOW
PancakePrince: BECAUSE IM GOING TO KILL HIM FOR REAL THIS TIME

.

End