Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. If I did, I would be J. K. Rowling.
Author's Note: Crackfic, anyone? AU in that Rodolphus and Bellatrix are divorced. Weird timeline.
Warning: Contains Bellatrix
"The Dark Lord has decided that Christmas preparations will begin today. When you have finished breakfast, the Dark Lord will assign decoration duties for the day." Bellatrix ate very rapidly. Everyone else slowed down to almost glacial speed.
Half an hour later, Voldie declared that breakfast was officially over. "Rabastan, you will begin plum pudding production. NOW." Rabastan scurried into the kitchen. "Crouch, put the garlands on the banisters. Bella, you are to sit in the attic, organize the wrapping paper, and not destroy anything whatsoever. Rodolphus, buy the tree. Lucius, acquire some new ornaments. Narcissa, you will be in charge of making sure Rabastan doesn't put anything too strange in the pudding. I will wander around and check your progress."
"Which attic, Master?" asked Bellatrix anxiously.
"The third-best attic above my bedroom," replied Voldemort. She left.
"Do what I told you to do. And do it now."
