A/N: I'm going to make this as short as possible. Kinda intense? And this is my first Homestuck fanfic, please leave a review if I did something wrong or just tell me how you enjoyed it. Oh yeah and for the most part of the story everyone is OOC because it's John's nightmare and it's his worst fears.

DISCLAIMER: All rights belong to Andrew Hussie the huss.


It was dark. Everywhere you look it was black, and wherever you look you can't find anything. Dust or dirt, or even the reassuring prescence of wind. Just darkness. John doesn't even know if he was flying or standing in the first place.

He pushed his foot against the floor, and felt ground. It was good, he thought, he preferred the normalcy of walking although flying was pretty neat too.

John was never afraid of the dark, although he was merely a little bothered, especially after everything he came through.

He walked, he needed to find anyone. His heart started to thrum against his chest, he doesn't even know what might happen to them.

But the possibilities raced in his head and suddenly he was running, he doesn't know if it was left or right but it didn't matter to him, he just needs to know where the hell are his friends and what happened to them.

His footsteps echoed everywhere, and tears started to build up in his eyes, no no no no no! Just please...

Being alone in the dark was terrifying, not because of imaginary monsters- John has faced a lot of real ones- but because he felt absolutely helpless, and he didn't know what happened to them, or what was currently happening and the possibilities are absolutely terrifying and what's worse is it could actually happen.

John skidded to a halt. Red. Red liquid by his feet. He followed the trail and he saw his father, lying on the floor, dead. Then there was their version of Roxy, Rose's mother, bloodied on the floor too. Then there was grimdark Rose, her hand close to her mother's.

John started to hyperventilate, no, no no stop...

He didn't know when he started to shake, but he's shaking. Badly.

"Help me!"

John turned around and saw Rose, again, as a god tier and oh my gog she was bleeding in the chest.

"ROSE!" John screamed, running to Rose. But as he took every step closer she just seemed to be further out of reach.

She clutched her chest, and scowled at John.

"Why didn't you save me?"

John was now flying, flying as fast as he could but it was too late, she collapsed on the floor, then was unconscious. John stopped and kneeled. He cried, tears flowing freely down his chest.

"Oh my gog Rose I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." John sobbed.

He heard a horrified gasp behind him, and when he turned around and saw Roxy, she was trembling and she looked so horrified and John failed her.

"Oh gog Roxy I'm sorry." John said hastily, standing up and walking to her, but Roxy walked back, then glared at John.

"You failed. You failed to save my mother." She hissed.

John let out a hiccup.

"I know Roxy I'm so so so so so sorry please-"

"You failed to save your friend." She growled.

John sobbed.

"I know I'm sorry I- I- I-" John's mind wasn't processing anything. He lost Rose twice, and he just lost his Dad, and Rose's mother was dead and Roxy hates him.

"You failed to save me." Roxy breathed.

John snapped up to see a sword sticking out of Roxy's chest and John gasped in horror, as he pulled it out and cradled Roxy gently.

"I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry" He repeated like a mantra.

"You failed to save them." Roxy said, before finally releasing her final breath.

John stiffened and turned around, Roxy's corpse still in his arms. There was everyone he loved and knew, dead on the floor.

"Why didn't you save us John?" They all said, even though they're all dead.

John fell to his knees, a fresh batch of tears flowing down his face. Everyone was dead.

"F1X TH1S."

John looked up to see Terezi, not blind. She looked so angry, murderous even.

"F1X TH1S, JOHN. YOUR3 TH3 ONLY ON3 WHO C4N."

John hiccuped, and tried to go anywhere in the past, then blue engulfed him but nothing happened. His eyes widened in horror and he tried again, and he was enveloped in blue again and nothing still happened. He tried and he tried and he tried and he tried but he still failed.

Terezi glared at him.

"YOU F41L3D EV3RYON3 JOHN."

And she too, lost consciousness, then a pool is cerulean blood surrounded her.

John sobbed. He fell on his knees and cried, tears flowing down his cheeks, and dripping to the floor, he was everyone was dead and he couldn't even do anything.

"Why didn't you save me John?"

John looked at the side, there was Jade, her eyes empty.

"I'm sorry." He whispered.

"You let me die twice."

Rose suddenly appeared behind John, her eyes empty too.

"Didn't I tell you to not play the game?"

John started to cover his ears, it hurt too much, how helpless he was and how he was unable to help.

"YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO FUCKING SAVE US."

"Stop, please..." John whispered.

"John, why didn't you give me the ring? Do you know what means to be dead? How it sucks?"

John shut his eyes.

"YOU H4D TH3 POW3R. YOU DIDN'T US3 1T."

John hiccuped.

"John, why did you let my girlfriend die?"

"Stop, stop!"

"John, I thought you liked me..."

"Stop, please!"

John clamped his hands over his ears.

"I was your grandma, yet you let me die."

John sobbed.

"PLEASE, STOP!"

"What will Dave think? Didn't you think he would miss me?"

"STOP! STOP STOP STOP!" John screamed loudly. Guilt built up in his chest and it hurt so much can you please all stop please please please please-

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry" John repeated over and over.

"I would've loved to meet my son, yet I didn't know he would let me down."

"PLEASE STOP! I'M SORRY!"

Their voices blended together of how John failed them, and John was screaming for them to stop and how he was sorry. The ache in his chest was getting worse and worse and can you please all stop please it hurts so much stop please...

"John, John!"

John ignored the familiar Texan accent and shut his eyes even more.

"PLEASE STOP! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE I'M SORRY!" John screamed.

"John! John? John!" Suddenly everyone was screaming his name, but in a worried tone. He didn't want to stop, he was afraid.

"PLEASE!" John screamed, his voice hoarse. "PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE!"

"JOHN!"

John woke up with a gasp. It was all a dream- or a nightmare. He looked around him, and a blurry array of colors surrounded him, and there was everyone, alive and well. They were all blurred, yes, but he could see that they were looking at him in worry. There were different colors inside the whites in their eyes, and John can't help but sigh in relief.

John could feel the cool air, especially cool today because he felt the sweat on his body and the tears on his face.

Dave's red eyes stared at him, then since he was the closest to him he hugged him and patted his back soothingly.

"It's okay, dude. It's all over." He whispered gently.

Jade crawled to him, worry etched to her face, and hugged them both.

"It's okay, John. We don't blame you, you saved us." Jade whispered gently.

John couldn't help but sob in relief, heat pressing both sides at him, instead of the coldness of a corpse.

Rose followed and hugged them too.

"You did everything you did, John. You helped us all."

Roxy crawled to them and hugged them.

"Even though I know you the least compared to everyone else, you showed me how great you are." Roxy whispered with a smile.

Soon everyone was in the group hug, telling John how they were thankful to him, even a reluctant Karkat. Everyone needed each other's warmth, especially after the game.

John couldn't even fake a smile or joke or do anything, instead he just hugged everyone in his reach and sobbed because everyone was alive and everything is okay and it was so warm and it was all okay and nobody blames him and it was just so so so so warm and everyone was ALIVE, and everybody loves him and nobody blames him.

"You're all alive." He whispered in relief, a huge smile on his face. "Thank you guys. Thank you so so much."