Riot; a violent disturbance of the peace by a crowd.

A simultaneously invigorating and fearful opportunity that proves too tempting for most of the inmates, especially after the horrific death of a fellow prisoner in such a degrading and humiliating nature. A lost inmate with wisdom and care that was all too fragile for the type of lifestyle a person needs to possess in prison.

She laid cold and motionless on the cafeteria floor, trying to send an angel up to heaven without the circumstances of her death getting in the way, but no amount of effort could save anyone from the repercussions. People were at fault and the inmates want them to get what they deserve. And with a riot at their fingertips, they let their morality fly free into the sky catching up with Poussey along the way.

Not many run from the chanting and screaming herds of people that violently shake down the space around them, but Alex and Piper have proved themselves caught up in messes they just wanted to get out of, and so they opt for the chapel instead. A peaceful hideaway from the surrounding hell that is unfolding outside.

They huddle behind the furthest chair from the entrance, no words, only tangled up in each others arms cautiously listening to the chaos. It's distant, but the dark tone is vividly recognisable

*BANG* Alex jumps with the sound of a gun shot. And another, and another as the sound echoes loud enough to send shivers down her spine.

After the gun shots, follows the screaming.

Pleading.

Begging.

It's too messy to try to decipher what's been said or who's mouth it's coming out of, but it's haunting all the same.

It reminds Alex of exactly what she's running away from. The one thing that follows her like a dark shadow wherever she goes, searing it's eyes into the back of her head. It's Aydin. It's what Alex did to Aydin.

She's tried running from her sinister reality and it always catches her.

She's tried facing it head on and it's confronting nature leaves Alex in a worse place than before.

Nothing helps. It all just hurts. It just aches like a sore that's never really started to heal.

Piper can feel the emotions within Alex's body shaking uncontrollably like a volcano that's about to erupt. She clutches her hand tighter, trying to give Alex some indication that she's there, that she doesn't have to do this alone anymore.

She brings Alex's trembling hand up to her lips and plants a light kiss, trying to catch her eyes in the process but failing miserably as Alex keeps her head down. "Al I've got you. You're safe." That's all she wants Alex to be. Piper was an absent reminder of how far power can seperate two people and how prison can suppress a love so strong it could move mountains. Piper blamed the prison, blamed Alex and blamed the people around her but at the end of the day she knew she was the only one at fault. She made the decisions. She chose the dark road. And now she's trying to find a flashlight so she can see again.

Alex and Piper hear the excruciating sounds creeping closer with every second that passes by. Their heartbeats rising and anticipation levels sky rocketing to unknown limits as they pray to themselves that they aren't going to be swept up in this predicament. The screaming and yelling is right outside the chapel door just waiting to burst the seams of the safe haven Alex and Piper thought they were in. Alex's shaking increases and Piper thinks she's about to jump off the edge of sanity, so she holds her for dear life trying to save her from the edge.

But slowly and steadily, the cacophony of voices drifts away, becoming more and more distant and letting Alex walk back from the fall she was about to endure.

"Let's go ok?" Piper puts her finger under Alex's chin, ushering it to face her before helping her onto her feet.

Alex follows Piper out of the chapel like she's a student and Piper's the teacher, in a weird inferior practice that she doesn't quite understand herself. And somehow it makes perfect sense once Piper looks down at the ground.

Blood. So much blood. Smeared in a crooked line right in the middle of the hallway. In a panic, Piper turns around, about to let words of guidance escape her mouth before Alex looks down, but she already is and her face tells all.

Piper can't say anything. It's as if someone has their hands around her neck, choking her viciously and disabling her ability to speak. She just stares apologetically with her mouth wide open, wiggling with an attempt to let something leave her mouth. Some form of comfort. Anything.

"Piper, I can't..." It comes out as a wet and disorientated whimper that cuts deep like a knife. She's hunched over, like she can't even bear the weight of herself, still staring at the blood, and being flooded with vivid images that make her feel like she's drowning and the only escape is the tears that leave her eyes. She lets them run free because let's face it, she couldn't hold them back if she tried, no matter how much she wanted to.

Alex flicks her head up to the ceiling, letting out a pain filled moan until she is interrupted by Piper's soft words. "Close your eyes. Close your eyes, hold onto me and trust me. I'll take you where it's safe."

Alex does just that. Her breathing remains fast and inconsistent and her fingers press hard against Piper's skin for some form of stability. Piper looks down to where Alex's hand is touching hers and she can already see the marks it's creating, but she wouldn't dare say a thing. Alex is completely out of control and Piper swears she can see her reflection in the tears that slowly make their way down Alex's cheek. Piper is fucking sorry. She's so fucking sorry for it all. It didn't have to be this way. This wouldn't be happening if it wasn't for Piper. And the worst part is that no matter how many sorry's Piper says or how many times she wakes up feeling like she's being stabbed a thousand times, it will never soften Alex's wounds. They still remain more prominent than ever.

Stride after stride, Alex feels like she's been walking for a lifetime. Somehow with your eyes closed things seem dormant and out of the regular rhythm of time. But she perseveres. She doesn't ask any questions and continues holding onto the hope that they are not going to get caught up in a violent altercation and she is not going to look down and see more blood staining the bottom of her boots.

They come to a halt. Alex hears a door open in front of her. She's ushered forward, and then hears the door again behind her.

"It's ok Alex, you can open your eyes now." Piper whispers in her ear with a tenderness that is the all too familiar.

Alex cautiously opens her eyes to Yoga Jones seated on her bed and a meticulously luxurious prison space where one Judy King used to lie.

Piper analyses the room trying to find anything that can help the situation. She rips out a few tissues from a purple box sitting on the counter and proceeds to wipe up the blood trail that her and Alex had tracked into the room.

The blood is so in focus and noise has familiarised itself with Piper that it takes her a second to look over at Alex who has a blanket close to her face while she excruciatingly whimpers. If pain was in the form of a sound, this would be it. It sounds like someone is beating her insides. Like the souls of demons have taken over Alex and every ounce of purpose she ever had. It's so very painful to hear and Piper can't imagine how Alex must feel having to endure every bit of it.

"What's happening out there?" Yoga Jones says lightly, deferring Piper's focus from Alex.

"You don't want to know. Just trust me on this one, don't go out there." Piper lifts herself up off the ground and places the blood soaked tissues in a pile next to the door.

Simultaneously, Yoga Jones and Piper stare at Alex who's eyes are closed. She shakes uncontrollably; tears dropping off the side of her face soaking the blanket. She doesn't know how there's still anything left inside to cry out.

With gentle steps, Piper walks over to Alex and places her hand on her back in an attempt to offer some protection. The image of Alex snags at Piper's heart, clouding her eyes in the process. The lump formulating in Piper's throat feels like guilt and sorrow and the sting in her chest is the switch that let's her own tears run like a river.

"What do I do?" Piper mouths to Yoga Jones with her hazy eyes making sure to remain out of Alex's view. She wants to be the person that can save Alex, lift her out of the water and be the one that stops her from drowning in her own tears but she has no idea how to. She can't get a grip on her own emotions, let alone be able to help someone else's.

Piper frantically locks onto Yoga Jones for answers as she watches the cogs in her mind turn, trying to land upon a solution.

Jones tiptoes over and crouches in front of Alex, landing her hand on top of hers "Alex, think of your time here as a manda..."

"Shut the fuck up with your mandala bullshit" It comes out of Alex's mouth like a heavy punch that knocks everyone in the room into utter awareness and shock. The vibration of the words linger a little bit too long, like the strum of a guitar string, but much more aggressive. Alex immediately feels bad. She doesn't need to talk to people like this, especially someone trying to help her, but she can't stop it. Everything's seeping out of her and it's like she's watching from the outside looking in, unable to make any logical decisions.

Yoga Jones doesn't feel the need to reply. She knows her place. And her place is on her bed, silent and that's exactly where she heads to.

Piper puts her arms around Alex and the thick blanket she has wrapped around her, clutching them both, trying to make sure she doesn't fall apart in her arms. Holding her as tight as possible in hopes that the fear will squeeze right out of her.

"Make it stop Piper" Alex whispers into Piper's chest. She sounds like a scared child that wants nothing more than to be held until the storms over.

The words rip apart Piper right on the spot. She's responsible for causing and fixing this and she can't even formulate a plan good enough to get Alex out of this state temporarily. "I don't know how to Al, I don't know how." Piper doesn't know who sounds more damaged, herself or Alex.

"I don't know if this will help.." Yoga Jones passes Piper a black smart phone with headphones connected to the bottom. "I listen to it to relax me." Yoga Jones stays as far away as possible stretching her arm out to meet Piper's hand, scared of another outburst from Alex. She doesn't have to be a part of the pain to notice it, and she almost feels as consumed as Piper and Alex in such a small room.

Piper meets Alex's forehead with hers, feeling Alex's warmth radiating around her body. She feels the need to whisper, like speaking at regular volume is too loud for the circumstances. "Put the headphones on Al. It might help."

Alex lifts her head up to face Piper's. Her body has never felt so heavy and the second she has a glance at Piper's discomfort, everything just goes black. "I'm so sorry Piper" It's ejected like a cry that never fully had lift off, but got interrupted mid way.

"What, why are you sorry? You don't have to be sorry for anything. It's me that's sorry."

"Look at what I'm doing to you" Alex is sobbing loudly and violently, retaining eye contact with Piper in an effort to torture herself even further. She doesn't want Piper hurting due to her own agony. It's her own pain, not Piper's.

"Stop. Breathe, and stop apologising for things you don't have to apologise for." Piper feels like she's shoving a sock down her throat to try and suffocate anything that wants to find their way out of her. She needs to be strong for Alex. Alex needs her to be the rock that carries them both to safety. It's not a matter of if the pain will go away, it's the fact that when Piper is cut open and the pain rushes out, she has to act like she's ok.

Alex tries to take a long, deep breath in but she breaks; she shatters, into a million pieces all over the floor and Piper doesn't know what to do another than press their bodies together and be ready for the clean up that follows. Piper's so fucking sorry it has to be this way.

Piper moves her leg slightly, hearing the rattle of the headphones that she forgot about. She lets go of Alex and lifts them up onto Alex's head. "Put these on and imagine you're somewhere else but here."

Alex looks at them, skeptical. But as weak as she is, she puts the headphones on top of her ears. It's some kind of weird relaxation music. Slow and mellow. But Alex does what she's told. She tries to imagine being somewhere else. Somewhere where she's not afraid of herself anymore, or more afraid of the guilt that's consuming her. She's tried to run from her pain again and again, but no matter how fast she runs, it always catches up to her, right around the corner just waiting until Alex turns to see it.

She shuffles around, letting her head rest on Piper's lap. She closes her eyes and let's the music drift her off into another world other than reality.

"Is she ok?" Yoga jones says worryingly to Piper who is trying out her own relaxation techniques.

"It's rough times right now." The simple answer is "yes" and Piper can't really comprehend why Yoga Jones is asking her a question that she already knows the answer to.

"And you? How are you doing with all of this?"

"I don't know how to help her. I'm trying, I really am. But I don't know what I can do to help her." It feels like Piper's been put in reverse. She's about to drive all the way back to the falling apart stage again and she's bracing herself for the impact.

"I was more talking about your personal predicaments"

Piper shakes her head. "I just want her to be happy. That's all. I don't care about the rest." Piper starts stroking Alex's arm delicately, following her veins like it's a map to her escape. "I fucked up a lot of things, and now it's my turn to fix it."

"Piper, you can't fix people. They need to fix themselves."

"I can try." Piper can't even say the words. They come out unrecognisable like she's talking in another language. She clears her throat and enunciates each word slowly "I can try".

The concentration pivots in an instant as they hear footsteps approaching the door. An unspoken fear fills the room and it becomes difficult to breath. Without a second going by, the door is kicked off it's hinges, lying flat on the floor to reveal an officer with his gun drawn. He swings it from Yoga Jones, to Piper, to Alex and then back again "I NEED TO SEE YOU ALL WITH YOUR HANDS UP."

Piper delicately lifts Alex's head out of her lap and joins Yoga Jones in placing her hands next to her face, palms facing the unknown officer. Alex is still in a daze, virtually weak from the emotional turmoil she had undertaken, and she groggily moans at the in-distinct sounds in the background of her mind.

"INMATE, HANDS UP" The officer looks directly down the barrel of his gun and his prime target is Alex. She still isn't part of reality. She's somewhere far where she was told to go and things don't hurt as much there. She doesn't hear what the officer is saying, it's all in mumbles and white noise.

Poussey is prominent in Piper's mind. The seconds of suffocation play repeatedly like it's on a record. All that Piper can think about is how Alex can easily be next. All it takes is a few seconds, one stupid guard, and one inmate to kill a life and if Alex goes, Piper does to. "AL, GET UP" Piper screams in fear, clutching at the optimism of safety that isn't guaranteed.

"DID I ASK YOU TO SPEAK INMATE?" If they were playing a game of who can yell the loudest, the officer is definitely winning. His saliva sprinkles out of his mouth with every word and the drooping eyelid playing tango with a three inch long scar makes Piper sweat in her boots.

Alex jiggles around, rubbing her eyes and waiting for the room to shift into focus and when it does, she's greeted by a haunting reality "Whoah, what the hell?" she says with a husky, half asleep undertone.

"Stand up slowly inmate. Hands behind your head." The depth of the officers voice makes the whole room shake. His gun remains the central fear of the room with his finger laying loosely on the trigger.

Alex puts her hands up, mirroring the other occupants of the room. She glances at Piper, virtually coming undone with fear and she knows it.

"All three of you, go to the wall. Keep your hands where they are." Vigilantly, one after the other, Alex, Piper and Yoga Jones stop inches from the wall, not daring to look at one another in fear of what will happen.

"This is Hanson, copy. I've got three in here."

A few seconds later, they are greeted with an officer each. "Inmates, do not move".

They are patted down in the most degrading and haunting nature possible, not leaving anything to the imagination. They don't opt for a painless search. Everything is fast, efficient and rough, pushing and pulling the inmates in any direction they please. From the corner of her eye, Piper watches one of the guards turn and grab the phone that lays upon the bed and another collectively places the bloody tissues in a clear zip lock back.

In a sigh of relief, the guards approach the finishing line of patting the inmates down. "Is this your bunk?" The officer has one hand still running the outside of Alex's leg.

"No" Alex says quietly.

"THEN GET THE FUCK TO YOUR BUNK INMATE, ALONG WITH ANYONE ELSE NOT IN THE RIGHT BUNK" Alex jolts with the volume that enters the space, but doesn't think to disrupt the peace. It's it worth it. The risks are too high.

Out of the door Piper and Alex witness the rushing of police officers, SWAT teams and prison guards, all with authoritative stances and a direct route, nearly knocking Piper right off her feet as they storm by, never even looking back at her, let alone apologising

With another step, Piper hears the familiar squelching under her feet and she is overcome with dread as she looks down at the blood beneath her. Somehow in all the hysteria she had forgotten about it. She looks back at Alex fearing the worst, knowing how much of a trigger this is for her, knowing that she can't crumble again. Not now.

Alex's head is up, pointing at the roof, making sure she isn't watching where she is walking. She's seen what's under her and she knows that the second she looks down again the floor with swallow her into a dark hole that she won't be able to get out of. Not even with Piper's help.

"Alex.." Piper reaches for Alex's hand, missing it as she pulls it away from her. "Shh, just, just shh. I'll be fine" Alex doesn't know if she's trying to fool herself or Piper. This isn't fine. It's far from it. She didn't know her PTS was this deep until she saw the blood. She thought it would stop at the nightmares and the crying. She didn't think about triggers. But this... The blood... It's too much.

Alex begins to walk with almost the same authority as the people with weapons running past her. Piper has no choice but to follow. She's scared to say anything more, knowing that she won't ever say the right thing.

Alex gets to the bunk with her head still remaining upright and Piper following her right behind her heels. They are the first ones out of the whole bunk to be situated and the thickness of guards is astounding.

"Get in your bunk and fucking stay there" An unknown voice echoes through the dorm with Alex and Piper following the order. Alex doesn't look back at Piper for a second. She's too caught up in trying to keep herself together and she knows that Piper's doing better than she is.

As she sits on her bed, Alex looks down at her shoes and the footprints of blood she's created. She remembers cutting Aydin's body up. All the blood. Dismembering the body. Having it lay right in front of her.

The blood.

The blood.

The blood.

Her chest goes tight in a panic and she quickly looks up again as she tries to take her shoes off without looking. Untying the laces, loosening the flap, ripping the shoe off her foot and then repeating the process with the other, all while practically blind. Her hand slips, touching the sole of the second shoe. She doesn't have to look down to know what's on her skin. She can feel it. She can feel her pulse beating in her head almost waiting for it to explode, but she races to her jacket that's hung up on a hook and wipes away the blood, again, keeping her eyes well away. She puts the shoes at the entrance way to her bed and makes sure to look in the other direction. She catches Piper looking and without a word, she knows that she's been watching the whole time by the look on her face. It hurts, so Alex looks away because it's the easiest damn thing to do right now.

One by one inmates come rolling in. Most covered in specks of blood, others drenched in it.

Red walks into the bunk looking defeated, eyeing Piper up while she does the same to Red. Piper notices the left side of her body stamped with a bloody handprint. "You missed the bloodbath. A whole bus load is getting shipped down to max as we speak."

"I'm glad I missed it" Piper sounds more like a zombie than anything. The mellow monotone voice of someone with their mind elsewhere.

"Were you with Alex?" Piper nods with agreement at Red's question and the name snaps Piper's attention back to where it needs to be, proving too imperative to ignore.

"Did she witness any of it?"

"Just the blood on the floor, that's it." That's it. Piper scares herself at just how easily she let it roll off her tongue after witnessing Alex practically suffocate every time she saw the blood. She doesn't correct herself. It's too late for that.

"Good. She doesn't need the added torture"

"I know..." Piper doesn't want to ask, she really doesn't want to know but she knows she will hear it anyway so it may as well come from Red. "We heard the screams Red, what went on out there?"

Red looks at Piper like she's disappointed and Piper doesn't quite understand why. "The killed two guards. Dragged their bodies through the hallway to the cafeteria and left them there in the same place Poussey was. And then of course, they had to go one step further. They imprinted their bodies. Piper, it's the same brand that you have on your arm."

Piper's stomach drops. "The window?"

"The swastika. Keep it hidden at all times. Piper, you're just like the guards that they killed. This isn't a game you want to play. I can assure you, if you play it, you will be next."

Piper's chest starts caving in. She doesn't need this. She doesn't want any of this anymore. If only she could turn back time and realise this wasn't worth it from the beginning. People know about her branding. They think know exactly who she is and why she has an imprint on her arm. What does it matter if it's a window or a swastika, because they've both been placed there for the same reason. To try and permanently prove who Piper truly is, even when she doesn't know herself.

Author notes:

IT'S GOOD TO BE BACK. Not that my writing hiatus was long and all, but there's nothing like starting a fresh fic after an amazing new season of OITNB. It didn't take long for this storyline to work it's way into my mind and not want to get out, so I hope you guys will enjoy this ride with me like I always want you to.