Never before had Jack even properly noticed Ianto in the hub. He just blended into the shadows and ultimately tried not to get noticed so his secret wouldn't escape the confines of the room in which she was trapped...
And yet Jack felt a deep sense of betrayal at the revelation that his employee was lying to him, almost like he was a close friend and confident, and guilt that he clearly wasn't monitoring Ianto nearly closely enough. Realistically, it was clear that something was wrong with him, but Harkness had naively put this down to his shy personality and focused on his own problems.
Empty. Numb and empty. This was all he could feel as he went home that night, with the images of his boss pumping the only thing that really mattered to him full of holes. He has known that she was already gone, that that, that monster was not Lisa any longer, and yet he still clung to the distant hope that she was still inside. Worthless. That's what he told himself he was as he began to forge new scars into the ugly expanse of his stomach. Click. "It's Jack." Shit
