So I've seen the Hobbit twice now and thought, I needs me some more. And what better way to hold off till the next film than to experience the first one through the eyes of someone new?

Disclaimer: I don't own the Hobbit.

Owwwww. Her head felt like it had been set on fire, and then hit by lightening, before being on stamped on by a horse. A fat horse.

Whoever told her alcohol was her friend was a lying bastard; probably the same one who was poking her. She groaned pathetically and buried her head in the shoulder opposite her new found nemesis.

"Miss? Miss, are you quite alright?" a timid voice asked from her left, prodding her shoulder softly with one hand. "It's just, you seem to have passed out in my vegetable patch."

That would explain the earthy smell and why she could feel the sun on her face.

Eliza opened her eyes slowly, squinting up at the somewhat familiar face of a young man with worried brown eyes and shaggy brown hair framing his face. He was leaning over her anxiously with one hand extended as if to help her up. He was the first thing she noticed, the second was that yes, she was in fact lying in a vegetable patch; she could see cabbages on either side of her face, and feel them under her back. The third thing she noticed was that the familiar stranger was wearing a brown coloured waist coat and cream colored trousers. How in the name of God did she end up on a farm? And more importantly, what was she wearing? She glanced down to see that she was wearing a dress with short frilly yellow sleeves, with a darker yellow bodice and skirt. She had not left her house in this.

She moved up into a sitting position, using one hand to rub at her eyes and she held the other up to silently ask him to give her a minute. Ok, so she went out last night, got momentously drunk and ended up in the country side. This she could deal with. She may not have been wearing her own clothes but it was better than waking up naked in her friend's closet again.

She took a steadying breath and slowly opened her eyes to see the stranger, who had taken several steps back-presumably to give her room, looking at her as if she was mentally disabled. Behind him she could see that there was a small grassy green hill, with what appeared to be circular wooden doors and windows around it at even intervals.

She brought her confused gaze from the hill, to the stranger, back to the hill, then back to the stranger. "Is that- Does that look like- What is that?" she finally managed to croak out, pointing accusingly at the abode behind him. She was not crazy. She wasn't. Her mother swore that she had her tested, but that looked like something she'd seen before, something in a film, and now that she thought about it the stranger looked remarkably similar to an actor she'd seen in a trailer recently. She was feeling nauseous. Don't throw up, don't throw up, don't throw up.

He turned, oblivious to her inner panic, to search for what she pointed to. "That?" he asked pointing uncertainly at the hill, to receive a small nod in confirmation, "Is Bag End. It's my home in the Shire. Are you telling me you don't know where you are?"

She opened her mouth like a gaping fish and stared at him in horror. This was not happening, it couldn't be happening. She'd play it off as a drunken dream, but she could feel the sun on her face, and hear the birds in the trees, and in one moment of crystal clarity she knew that it was real.

"No,"she sniffed pathetically in reply, holding in her tears, "I'm afraid I know exactly where I am."

In hell.

She had finally drank herself to death and now she was in hell, wearing a stupid yellow dress and having a conversation with a young Bilbo Baggins. It serves her right, she didn't drink often, but when she did she drank entirely too much and always ended up doing stupid shit. Her mother always said it would land her in an early grave, but she would have gone sober for life if she knew there was even a remote possibility that she'd end up in a fictional world.

"Alright then," Bilbo said in a more cheerful tone, motioning with both of his hands for her to stand, "since you seem to be feeling better, I think you should be on your way. You've ruined enough of my garden as it is."

Ok, that was fucking rude.

There she was having a moment, and all he was worried about was his vegetable patch. She turned her disgusted gaze upon him. Strike one Mr Baggins, strike one.

"All I meant to say is that now that you're awake there's no need for you to be here-unless of course you want to be! Then that's perfectly fi-" Eliza cut of his rambling with a pointed finger in his face, ignored her nauseous, aching body, and dragged herself to her feet. Damn, she was feeling really light headed.

"All I meant to say was tha-" he tried to explain himself, nervously wringing his hands together, only to again be cut off.

"You want me gone, so I'll go." She didn't know where she'd go, or how she'd get there-seeing as standing was proving to be a challenge, never mind walking. She wouldn't stay where she wasn't wanted-be it by a real person or not. She'd just find a nice leafy bush to crawl under and die. With that in mind she hiked up her skirt, turned to give him what she hoped was an indignant glare, and stepped over two rows of cabbages onto the cold stone pathway.

She paused, scrunched up her face in confusion, and glanced down to see what was causing the weird sensation in her feet. What she saw caused her to exhale sharply and turn her horrified gaze towards a confused looking Bilbo. She had one last thought before the blackness descended and she fell to the ground.

Why is the hobbit taller than me?

Ok, so I know it's not very long, but the next chapter will be longer I promise! Leave a review to let me know what you think!

-The Lieutenant Sarcasm