Disclaimer: I do not own Fatal Frame II. It is copyrighted by Temco and is therefore their property.
Reader's Disclaimer: Alright, this is my first fic so go ahead and tear it apart. This was really just something of an exercise in attempting to get rid of my writers block, so, you know, it is what it is. Here's hoping you like it, but if you don't that's certainly not a problem either. Feel free to review, offer constructive criticism, and even flame the hell out of it. I openly welcome all three.
P.S.: This felt unnervingly and surprisingly angsty when I was writing it, so consider yourself warned and all that jazz.
Crimson Ribbon
By: Distilled
She felt intoxicated; despite the smell of rot and death, or perhaps because of it, her mind was nothing more than white noise and numbness. Although her senses still functioned, she could certainly still feel the damp, cool air hanging over her like a morbid blanket, she felt as though she were experiencing everything from a distance. It was almost as if she was herself within herself watching herself. Really it did not even make sense to her, but nothing made sense at the moment. The entire night, she absently reflected, was like one prolonged nightmare that her body steadfastly refused to be awoken from. And by the gods did she want to wake up because she could scarcely imagine…
"Mio?"
The voice, feather light but simultaneously weighted down by apprehension, pierced through her inner monologue like a razor sharp knife.
Mio was instantly drawn back into the present. Gazing around her, her rich brown eyes wide and inquisitive, she took in the stomach churning sight before her once more. Flaking her on all sides were the damned; souls forgotten by time and left to writhe in the agony of being eternally bonded to the earth with almost no chance of salvation. She could see them, the veiled priests donning their sanctimonious robes of navy blue and their tall, pointed hats, with their iron staffs clenched so tightly within their undead hands that it was almost as if they wished they could be the ones to perform her duty. No, there was no almost about it, she knew. She could feel their anxiety, their hope, their dread pouring off of them in waves, and she could see their faces, with her mind's eye, as she could feel their heavy, dead gazes resting on her and her sister. They were more than prepared to attempt the failure of their past once again should she not usher forth their long awaited deliverance.
Mio wrinkled her nose in disgust as she looked at them. How could they be so selfish? Did they truly not care about the pain they inflicted on those they ruined with this ceremony? Despite their claims of considering them deities, had these people ever truly cared about Itsuki? Akane? Yae? She could not imagine that they did, and this thought, momentarily parting the fog that clouded her mind, allowed her a instant of clarity. She had to go through with the ceremony; there was no question of that. No matter what she felt for those who surrounded her, she knew the moment she had decided to stay instead of flee that she had chosen this path. If she truly cared about those like Itsuki and Akane she would not let their sacrifices be in vain.
Mio took a trembling step forward, her mud coated black flats making audible squishing sound as she stepped on the damp earth at her feet. She could hear her breath within her skull like the wind howling through a hollow cave, and she could feel her mouth grow dry as though she were sucking on a cotton ball. Shaky, delicate fingers brushed away sweat soaked strands of chocolate brown tresses that clung to her face like dampened twine. And all the while she could feel their gaze bearing down on her, approving of every step forward and holding their breath at every pause. She tried to ignore their hidden eyes as they made the cavern feel as though the dirt walls were closing in on her, but she could not. The room, heavy with the chill of early fall and perhaps the dead themselves, felt claustrophobic now as she grew closer and closer. Even with a breeze flowing through the gaping hole in the roof of the room and the moonlight pouring in like flood waters breaking through a dam, she still felt her breath catch painfully in her chest as she tried to force herself to breathe and move forward. She realized, though, that it was not just their gaze, but what she read into it. Their gaze was a mirror by which she saw herself, by which she evaluated herself, and by which she judged herself. And that judgment, delivered from her mind, was damning.
She could not catch her breath, her thoughts seemingly choking her, and she could not shake the sense of the damning weight burdening her every step, so she fell to her knees clutching her arms. Her breath was coming in wheezes that were strained, short, and almost suffocating. She could also feel a bitter sting in her pupils as her eyes began to moisten. She tried to fight it off, to stand again, but part of her refused. Her body refused to move forward, and only allowed it self to start to convulse as she bit down on her lower lip, drawing blood which coated pink with burgundy.
Why!? she cried out within the confines of her mind. The question reverberated like an echo bouncing off the cave walls. That was because it was rhetorical. She knew the answer even before she looked up and saw the reason standing before her.
Mayu she thought to herself once more, her vision becoming blurred as tears formed a misty film over her eyes. She could still see her though. Standing before the pit, before the altar, was her twin sister. She looked so frail from Mio's perspective, her doe like brown eyes full of concern and unease, which was ironic considering the convulsing heap she found herself in. Her clothes, much better for wear than Mio's, gave her the appearance of a girl much younger than she was. Whether it was the browns of her thigh high dress, the fact that her black blouse was a bit to large, or the white frills of her dress seemed more appropriate on a younger girl, it did not matter. Standing before her Mio saw not Mayu the teenager, but the young girl. The same young girl whom she'd nearly lost to her selfishness in the forest all those years ago.
Guilt began to pour off Mio in waves and she could not longer restrain herself. The metaphorical damn broke as tears, hot and salty, spilled from her eyes like a torrential downpour. Tears spotted her sullied white skirt and torn brown blouse as she allowed them to come unimpeded. Sobs, which wracked her body so painfully that she almost choked, broke through the static air like a brick through glass. "Mayu!" she heard herself cry, though did not feel the words pass from conscious thought to action. "I'm so sorry! I shouldn't have left you!" she screamed, choking and coughing violently. Within seconds she slumped forward convulsing violently as she hugged her arms to her chest and shook her head.
Mio could feel the anxiety now festering beneath the once calm surface of the room as the hushed whispers of the priest echoed back and forth like the rolling of waves on the beach. But she was past caring. She would not do it, even if that meant ignoring the sacrifices of countless others before her. Every one of them could rot in this purgatory for all she cared, and if the X spilled out past the boundaries of the forest let it fall on the shoulders of another set of twins to quell its seemingly insatiable hunger. She refused to be the one left alone; she would not hurt her sister again.
And so she wept unbidden tears as the hall grew louder with the voices of the dead, and their panic grew more audible. Their voices were so loud, in fact, that Mio did not hear the nearly silent footfall that drew closer. It wasn't until she felt a gentle hand rest on her shoulder that she jumped slightly. Immediately looking up her eyes met those of her sister, which looked ethereal in their luminescence as the moonlight crept over them.
"Mio…there's no reason to feel bad, this is what we were born for." Her voice was tender, like the caress of a mother calming her child, but also strict with the assurance one felt when they knew they were right. Mio could not argue with her; she knew she was right, but she couldn't stand to look her in the eyes upon accepting the veracity of what she had said. Fortunately she did not have to.
Mayu gently grasped her sister's hand, and helped her rise to her feet. "Come on," she said with a smile as she led her sister toward the altar. Mio, still sniffling and shaky, simply acquiesced, keeping her eyes focused on the ground and her feet rather than the sight ahead of her. She could hear the priests' voices growing hushed as their hope at the ritual's completion had been renewed. The silence was painful to Mio's ears, but could not compare to the incessant pang in her heart. Even though Mayu was guiding her to the altar there was only so much she could do to force Mio to take part in the final act.
And so, when they finally came upon the stone altar, and Mayu laid down upon it, folding her arms over her chest, Mio simply stared down at her. "Mayu," she said, her voice heavy with unease and discomfort, but Mayu cut her off.
"Mio, we can't be together forever. No matter how much I may want you to be with me, it's just not possible," Mayu said, looking up toward Mio with imploring eyes. "Please Mio, we have to do this. I've known it for sometime now, though I don't know how. Even when we were children I had the feeling that a day like this might come." She then reached out and grasped Mio's wrist, guiding her forward until she mounted the altar as well.
The stone felt cool and slick to the touch as Mio braced her self against it, supporting herself with her knees and palms as she hung over her sister like the shadow of death. She could hear her breath echoing through her head once again, though this time it was far more painful. It was as if she were swimming in her own head now; every thought she had was murky and poorly constructed; every feeling existed in an abstract sense; and her inner voice sounded distant and drowned out. However, what rang through loud, crisp, and grating was the clanking of the staffs on the ground around her. The priests repeated their ominous beat again and again, slowly but steadily picking up speed as the metal rings of their staffs jingled like morbid Christmas bells.
"Mio," Mayu begged, "Please." Mio looked down at her sister, gazing deeply into her eyes. She could no longer feel anything; the white noise had returned with a brutal vengeance. She could scarcely detect her sister's hands reaching for her wrists, though their warmth attempted to draw her out of her catatonic state, and was only faintly aware when she hovered Mio's hands over her snow white throat.
"Mio…please…kill me."
Mio's hands went down of their own accord while what remained of her conscious mind fought to understand what was going on. She attacked the white noise with inner screams and shouts, but it all seemed for naught as it seemed to grow thicker and thicker. With every clang of a staff her control over her body was rendered moot and, as if seemingly possessed, she continued to act without knowing why. She could feel the warmth of her sister's neck drawing closer; she could hear her heartbeat in her head and she could practically taste the saliva as it slid down Mayu's throat. Mio could feel Mayu's very life resting on her hands.
Every second her hands drew closer, inch by inch. Seconds stretched out for an eternity. Each breath hung in the air like a thick fog, and the warmth of living flesh exuded an intoxicating feeling. Was it power? Was it dread? Was it elation? Mio didn't know, but she could feel the life. She could taste the life. She could feel it within her bone ridged fingers as she ran them over her sister's frail neck. She could feel it as she pressed down, the white flesh sinking in with pressure, slowly applied and frighteningly tender. Now she could feel Mayu's pulse, she could feel it pulsing under thumb. Ba-dump, Ba-dump, Ba-dump. She could feel each breath becoming progressively shallower and she could feel the saliva lodge itself in the throat, attempting to drain anyway it could. Mayu's body grew slack under her, and her extremities, finger, toes and all, started to turn a deep azure. She could see the life fleeing her sister's body, but it felt surreal to her. It was almost as if someone else was doing it. Perhaps it was because she had not looked into her face, but then something within her seemed to force her eyes down and away. Mio immediately took this as a challenge.
Against her body's will she managed to force her eyes to gaze into her sister's. She could see the life in them, the beauty, fading slowly but surely away. Their luminescence was growing dull and cold. Mio froze.
Hands loosened from around redden flesh for a moment and the staffs abruptly stopped their damning chant. Dread rushed over the hall like water over a waterfall; it crashed with a powerful force and threatened to drown all those swept up in it. Even Mayu, whose mind was a fog and numb from oxygen deprivation, could feel the terror rolling over her and from out of her. The only one who seemed unfazed was Mio, who simply smiled down at her sister in the loving way only a sister could.
Her hands slipped down past Mayu's neck coming to rest on her crimson ribbon and bosom. Mayu looked up at her sister questioningly, but Mio simply continued to smile, her blood coated lips cracking ever so slightly. She looked so tired with heavy bags hanging under her glazed eyes, yet her fatigue made her even more beautiful than Mayu ever thought possible.
"Mayu…we will be together. I'll never leave you again." Mio's hands swiftly yanked Mayu's ribbon loose and pulled it taught. Mayu looked up questioningly at her sister, her brow slightly furrowed as she attempted to right herself.
"Mio, what are you doing?" she asked, but even as the words passed her lips she knew exactly what Mio was preparing to do. Her eyes went wide with horror as she attempted to push herself upright. However, her attempt failed as her attempted strangulation left her arms feeling like so much spaghetti. She could not will her body to move, to sit upright, and was therefore helpless. All she could do was gaze up into her sister's tired eyes, and the sight filled her with such agony, so much distress, that she was sure she would go mad. "Mio don't!" she cried out frantically as she gazed up at her smiling sister.
Mio simply shook her head in response as she slowly drew the ribbon around her neck.
"Mio please!" Mayu cried out with her eyes wide and pleading.
But Mio didn't stop, she would not be stopped. Even as she heard the priests begin to shuffle forward, obviously just figuring out what she planned to do, she would not allow them to stop her. She pulled the red ribbon around her neck tightly, but just enough that she could manage to breathe. "I never forgot our promise," she said, tears spilling forth from her eyes onto her damp cheeks once more. And, in an instant, Mio was replaced by a girl in a stark white kimono whose hair was jet black and lustrous.
"Yae?" Mayu said with a breathless gasp. Indeed it was the girl who had managed to escape her fate, or at least her essence. Her face was at once serene and penitent, and altogether beautiful.
"Sae, I never meant to leave you behind." Yae gazed down upon the altar where Mayu had once been only for there to be another young woman in her stead. Donning a bloodied white kimono the face of her identical twin stared back up at her quizzically. Gone was the madness and bloodlust that once resided in her visage, now she was simply a confused teenager trying to make sense of what she saw.
"Yae?" Sae questioned, not quite believing what she saw. Yae simply nodded as her ashen hands pulled the rope even tighter. Sae gasped in horror as she forced the body she now possessed to move. However, even with her power, she found that she could hardly move. She needed some way to stall her, to keep her from going through with her plan. That was when she spotted them. The priests were running now with the mourners, the poor blinded bastards, following frantically behind them. But as she looked from them to her sister she knew that even they wouldn't be able to reach her. So she made one last desperate bid.
"Yae don't!" Sae cried as she tried to grab her sister's arm. She was too slow and she knew it as her hand grazed her sister's wrist, but arrested nothing. She watched in horror as Yae was momentarily replaced by Mio, who leaned off of the altar. It all seemed to happen in slow motion, moving frame by frame, with every second strained and painful to watch.
Mio, flickering between Yae and herself, flung herself into the abyss, drawing the ribbon across her throat so tightly that she broke the skin. As she fell she prayed that she would succeed in strangling herself before being devoured by the X. Her eyes were closed in fear of the sight, but she could feel it. She could feel its sinister air like slimy tentacles wrapping around her body, frantically calling for her. It wanted her, body and soul, and it hungered for her like no beast, no matter how savage, ever could.
Mio pulled the ribbon even tighter. It burned and ached for a moment as the tender red skin attempted to break it, but found its efforts for naught. The ribbon was sturdy enough to endure. She could feel her vision swimming and her mind growing numb and had to fight to keep the ribbon drawn tight, but she did. The ritual, in one way or another, had to be performed. She had to strangle herself. There was no other option. If she failed she damned no only herself but every other soul above her. However, the darkness grew thicker and more ominous and she continued to fall, her conscious mind still existing. It appeared as though she would not make it…
Sae… I'm so sorry.
Mayu sat numbly on the edge of the altar. She had long since gone catatonic even as the undead priests swarmed around her and the pit, their voices a torrent of nonsensical dread. There voices coalesced into a roaring static in which one thought continued to echo with vivid clarity.
Mio…why?
She knew no answer would be forth coming, but in her numbed state she could think nothing else. And so she sat while the spirits around her waited expectantly, dreading and hoping concurrently, praying the X would be appeased. Mayu could, in some abstract way, feel the tension in the air, but it mattered little to her. Her mind was not filled with thoughts of the X, but rather the sacrifice that had pitched herself into its bowels. That was until she heard cries of joy.
Snapping out of her stupor, she spun around to face the pit. Priests, crying out in triumph along with the mourners, were slowly disappearing even as they congratulated one another. When the two blocking her line vision disappeared she saw it. One lone crimson butterfly was fluttering out of the abyss.
Mayu gaped at the sight and felt fresh tears form in her eyes. They stung, but wonderfully so. And through the misty film she saw the lone butterfly flutter toward her before flying off past her head.
Mayu quickly gave chase, though her leg slowed her down considerably. The butterfly, seemingly cognizant of her disability, fluttered ahead at a slower pace allowing for her to be within a few meters of it. "Mio, please, wait!" Mayu cried, tears flowing unhindered down her cheeks. But the butterfly would not wait, even as they spilled out from the cave into the forest, blanketed by the cool, crisp air of night.
As she continued to give chase, Mayu saw hundreds of crimson butterflies appear before and beside her, fluttering in unison as they led her further and further through the forest and away from the forsaken village behind her. Following behind them as fast as her legs would allow, Mayu pushed ridged branches out of her way and nearly tripped over gnarled roots as she attempted to keep pace. "Mio!" she cried out as she managed to narrowly avoid another protruding root, "Don't leave me!" However, out of the hundreds and perhaps thousands of butterflies, she could not make out her sister, and none of them seemed to slow in the slightest.
She was becoming desperate, pushing herself past her limit as she attempted to run on her poor leg. It was painful, giving off the sensation of having a swollen melon grinding against her bones, but she would not stop. Even as she climbed a steep hill, she ignored the blinding pain that coursed through her veins. She would not lose Mio.
However, as she came to the top of the hill, Mayu watched in horror as the butterflies fluttered up and away from her. "Mio! Mio!" she called out frantically, tears still streaming down her cheeks. Her voice was hoarse now from a combination of running and crying, but she continued to call out for her sister. But the butterflies continued to disappear; one after another they were swallowed by the night and by the pale full moon.
Mayu felt herself break at this, and crumpled to her aching knees. "Mio," she whispered to herself, her voice laced with regret and sorrow. She had lost her without even saying goodbye, and now would never have the chance. "Why did you leave me Mio? Why?" she asked aloud, her voice croaking with every syllable. Fate seemed kinder this time around as Mayu begged the question.
A lone crimson butterfly, fluttering just over head, dipped down in front of the brunette. Mayu looked up and gasped. However, before she could utter forth a word, the butterfly gently ran a wing over her nose, before fluttering upward to join its ilk.
Bringing a finger to her nose, Mayu knew that words were no longer needed. Her sister's simple response had been enough.
A red imprint in the shape of a butterfly appeared on her neck, replacing the ephemeral rope marks which faded away completely.
The End
