Dr. Gold
Author's Note: This story contains subjects that would trigger memories and feelings for those who have suffered with sexual, physical and emotional abuse please be aware!
Isabelle French looked up at the towering office building before her. She reluctantly entered walking through the revolving doors and into the lush lobby. The lobby was crowded with people coming and going all dressed in suits and other elegant office attire. Belle suddenly felt very uncomfortable in her 'signature' black ensemble.
Lacey looked around the lobby in amazement. Never had she ever been in a room that possessed such majesty. With its high ceilings, magnificent chandeliers, plush furniture and floor to ceiling windows Lacey couldn't help but feel out of place.
After tearing her eyes from the beautiful interior in the lobby Lacey pulled out the crumpled piece of paper with her instructions written on it. Following the instructions, Lacey entered the elevators to the right of the oversized front desk behind which three immaculate blonde women worked giving out directions to those who were lost and taking phone calls.
Lacey rode the elevator to the twenty third floor of the massive building. Lacey rolled her eyes because the farther up the elevator went the more people seemed to get on making her feel claustrophobic. Lacey breathed a sigh of relief when the elevator finally landed on her floor.
Outside the elevator doors sat another immaculate looking blonde women behind a simpler desk. She smiled at Lacey's reaction, "Don't worry about it dear I see it all the time. How may I help you?" she asked.
Lacey uncomfortable, wrapped her arms around herself protectively, "I have an appointment to see Dr. Richard Gold."
The woman nodded and turned to her computer bringing up the doctors digital appointment book. While she did so Lacey studied the woman's features. She looked young though you could tell she was older than she appeared, she had gorgeous brown eyes which Lacey thought to be rare for a woman with brown hair.
Lacey looked away self-consciously when the woman looked up from the computer, "Name please?"
"Huh?"
"May I have your name?" the woman asked.
"Isabelle French." Lacey said stiffly. Lacey hated her name always have. When she was six she requested that her family refer to her as 'Bella' when she was seven she switched out the 'a' for an 'e'. When Belle turned twenty-one she changed her name from 'Belle' to 'Lacey'. For reasons Belle had rather not think nor speak about.
"Ah, Ms. French here you are! Dr. Gold is expecting you." the woman rose from her swivel chair behind the desk and led her down a short corridor and into a small and empty waiting room.
Lacey looked around waiting room in disbelief, it showed no resemblance whatsoever to the marvelous lobby downstairs. In fact, the only interesting thing about the waiting room were the three small stacks of magazines on the oak wood coffee table.
The woman led Lacey to a closed, four wood paneled door, "Just walk right in." she said.
Lacey flustered slowly walked to the door. She made a fist and raised it to the door as she started to knock.
The woman stopped her, "You don't have to knock." she smiled, "Dr. Gold has been awaiting your arrival for some time now, so much so that he cleared his entire schedule for today just for you."
Lacey eyes widened as she grasped the knob and turned it to the right and pushed it open.
The office was dimly lit only by a two lamps and an electric stone fireplace. As Lacey softly shut the door behind her she'd realized that the office was the complete opposite of what she was expecting. She hadn't known what she was expecting but this certainly wasn't it.
The office was professional and resembled the obvious luxury and elegance that was the main floor lobby. The office was cozy but with subtle hints of today's sleek modern interior design.
It was around this time that Lacey understood that she had been in the office for about two minutes and she still hadn't met the good doctor everyone just couldn't seem to shut up about.
Lacey gasped when she saw a man sitting in one of the elegant high back chairs in front of the fireplace with a book in hand. Dr. Gold looked up in surprise as a dashing slow smile grew upon his face, "My apologies, I hadn't meant to startle you." he said in his thick Scottish accent.
"It's not your fault." she mumbled.
Dr. Gold rose from his chair and started for his massive desk towards the back of the spacious room that was his office. Grabbing the slim remote that sat on the edge of his desk and pointed it at nothing in particular as he pressed a button. Lacey's jaw dropped as the a thick set of dark brown curtains automatically pulled themselves back revealing ten beautiful floor to ceiling windows still covered by thin, airy white curtains illuminating the lush space.
Dr. Gold smiled at her reaction, "I trust that you are Isabelle French, yes?" he asked sitting the remote back down and grabbing Lacey's file.
"Yes." Lacey said agitated.
Dr. Gold raised his eyebrows hearing in her voice the strong distaste she seemed to have for her own name.
Lacey's throat went dry as she took in the dashing beauty that was Dr. Gold. With his brown shoulder length hair, big brown eyes, breathtaking smile all paired with a tan blazer, white linen button up shirt, blue jeans and brown dress shoes. He looks gorgeously laid back to be a shrink, Lacey thought.
Dr. Gold cocked his head to the side as he took in the mesmerized, jaw-dropped expression that was etched on his patients face. "Are you alright Isabelle?" he asked concerned.
Lacey shook her head as if to shake away the naughty thoughts that had floated into her head without her permission, "Yes, yes. I'm fine."
"Okay." he said slowly, "Where would you like to sit?" he asked.
"The chairs are fine."
"Alright then." he smiled.
Lacey unsure slowly walked past the two plush couches and plopped down in the second high back chair clinging on tightly to the strap on her dark green satchel. Dr. Gold being the gentleman waited until she was seated to take his seat in the chair in front of her.
"Alright Isabelle," he started taking one last look at her file before grabbing a clip board from one of the nearby side tables with a thin notepad clipped and placing it in the file "how about you start out by telling me why you're here?"
Lacey sighed slipping her satchel strap over her head, "I'm being ordered to be here."
"That's right, but tell me why you're being ordered here."
"Shouldn't you know already?"
"I do know but I want you to tell me."
"Fine. I am being ordered here because I tried to throw myself off of an overpass."
"Why did you attempt suicide Isabelle?"
"Please stop calling me that!" she groaned.
"It's your name." he said confused.
"I know that." she snapped "I just really hate it."
"I would ask you why but we'll get into that later. But until then what will I be calling you? Lacey?"
"No. Lacey."
"Okay, why did you attempt suicide Lacey?"
"Because I wanted to die."
"You said 'wanted' does that mean you want to live now?"
"I don't know."
"You say that you wanted to die, why?"
"Because I wanted to end my suffering."
"Why are you suffering?"
"This isn't helping me at all!" she yelled.
"I can't help you if I don't know what you need help with. Let me tell you something Lacey: I've been at this a long time now. You are not the first patient to have been assigned to me. And you may not know this but you are going to be with me for as long as I say." he said leaning towards her
"What are you saying?" she asked.
"I am saying that you are my patient until I say so. Until I feel that you no longer need my assistance." he said with narrowed eyes, "Now tell me Lacey, why are you suffering?" he said leaning back in his chair.
"I don't want to talk about that."
"That is quite alright. How about we talk about why you refuse to be referred to by the name you were given at birth." he suggested.
"I just don't want to be Isabelle anymore."
"Why is that?" he asked.
She sighed and ran a hand through her reddish brown hair, "I just didn't want to be Belle anymore."
"Why not?"
"Because I was Belle when my entire world started crash and fall down around me."
"Lacey, listen to me. You're going to be here for a while unless you start to open up. And I want don't want you to be in therapy for the rest of your life. You are a young and beautiful woman. You deserve the best out of life."
Lacey was taken aback by his words. He had only just met her a moment ago yet he was encouraging and complimenting her in ways she'd only heard about in movies and read about in books. Tears welled in her eyes and she blinked them back before they had a chance to spill, "Why are you saying these things to me? You just met me."
"Because they are true and you need to hear them." he said leaning forward and taking her hand.
Lacey blushed, "I don't know what to say."
"How about you start out by telling me why you tried to take your life in such a graphic manner."
"I wanted to make sure it would take. I wanted to feel like someone cared before I ended it all. That's why I waited so long, I liked how they were taking the time out to stop me, to convince me that I was loved and well liked."
"You don't feel you are loved and well liked?"
"No." she pouted.
"You wanted to feel loved? You have your mother and father, you don't feel as though they love you?"
She laughed without humor, "It's because of those idiots that I am the way I am. If they had been better parents I wouldn't have been on the edge of that overpass."
"Why do you say that?"
She opened her mouth and then shut it quickly.
"Lacey, you have to open up to someone. You need to let some of this go. It's not healthy to keep pain bottled up like this."
"How would you know?" she cried "You therapists are all talk you know that? You have no idea what it is like for your patients. You have no idea what I'm going through. You have no idea what it's like for people who attempt suicide. All you know is that you have a degree and that in the world of colleges and universities that proves that you are somewhat eligible to tell people like me what to do."
Dr. Gold sighed, letting go of her hand and leaning back into his chair shaking his head. After taking some notes on his notepad Richard put down the pen, file and notepad and looked deep into Lacey's eyes. He leaned forward a bit.
Lacey's heart quickened. She said a silent prayer hoping that he wasn't angry with her or worse, he hoped that he wouldn't have her transferred to another psychiatrist.
"You're most certainly right Lacey."
"I-I am?" she stuttered in disbelief.
"Yes. Let's make a deal shall we?" he asked sitting back in his chair.
"Depends on what it is." she answered skeptical.
Dr. Gold laughed, "How about I tell you my story and you tell me yours?" he said holding out his hand.
Lacey looked down at his hand and then at him suspiciously. But then after careful consideration she shook his hand agreeing to his deal. Besides, what dark secrets could a shrink possibly have she thought.
"Deal struck then?" he asked raising an eyebrow.
"Deal struck." she agreed.
"Well then let's start out with the basics shall we? Hi, I'm Richard Gold. I'm a psychiatrist." he started.
Lacey giggled, "Hi Richard." she said.
Richard smiled leaving Lacey breathless. It was then that Lacey realized that despite having to revisit her heartbreaking past this was the most fun she'd had in years. It was also the first time she'd laughed in a really long time. Richard also smiled it hadn't even been a full day and he could see her opening up right before his very eyes.
"Hello! I was born right here in Storybrooke, Maine. I am an only child. My mother found out she was pregnant with me when she was just the tender age of sixteen, she gave birth to me when she was seventeen. My father, Malcolm was eighteen at the time of my birth. My mother, abandoned my father and me when she and her family moved out of state. I was barely a month old when she dropped me off at my father's home and never returned."
Lacey's jaw dropped in astonishment, "I am so sorry."
"That's not necessary. I never met her and I have no desire to do so."
"That doesn't make it right."
"That much is true Ms. French. Shall I continue?"
"Please." she nodded.
"Like I said my father was eighteen years of age. Much too young to care for a child on his own, so he left me in the care of my grandmother, her sister and grandfather Charlotte, Athena and George while he finished school, eventually went onto college and got a good job. I was about eight or nine when we'd finally moved into a place of our own. A three bedroom two and a half bath town home. Now I will be honest my father wasn't the greatest in the world but I applaud him for doing the best he could which is all I could ever ask for. When I was ten years of age my father got an offer for a better job out of state. I was originally supposed to be with him but when my principal made it very clear that if I were to go I would most likely have to be held back. So my father made the decision that I would finish out the school year in Storybrooke and he would spend every weekend with me when he could until I finished school. When he left he'd spent a minimal of two weekends with me and never returned until I was twelve."
"What a douchebag!" Lacey exclaimed.
Richard laughed making Lacey blush with embarrassment, "Sorry." she whispered sheepishly.
"No I understand. I think he's a douchebag too."
"Then why do you applaud him?" she asked confused.
"Because his leaving me with my aunt and grandparents was the best thing that man could have ever done for me."
"Why is that?"
"After my father abandoned me I feel into a deep, dark depression. I couldn't eat, sleep or stop crying. I also couldn't wrap my young feeble mind around how my father could just pick up and leave without even as much as a phone call. Eventually I got through it with the help of my family. I soon found myself having the time of my life here in Storybrooke. I went to great school, had good friends and had more love than a kid that age knew what to do with."
"It sounds wonderful." Lacey smiled.
"Oh it was." he said grinning "That is until dear old dad came to ruin it all." he frowned. "Before I continue, can I offer you some refreshments?" he asked. "I forgot." he admitted shamefacedly.
"No thank you. I'm more interested in hearing the rest of the story." she said softly.
"Alright then." he said.
Lacey sat across from her therapist completely engaged and immersed in the attention-grabbing tale that was his life. Not only was she fascinated by his story but how open he was about his life. It was almost as if his past didn't bother him at all. Lacey wanted that for herself and she hoped and prayed to God above that Richard would help her to achieve it.
Richard went on to explain to Lacey that after a productive day at school he came home to find his father sitting at the kitchen table in his grandparent's' home. Feeling both shock and anger he tried his best to push aside those feelings and welcome his father back into his life with open arms. After spending the weekend with his son Richard's father announced that he had started a whole new life without his only son. Richard told his patient of how the news crushed him so. Malcolm also announced that he would take his son with him when he left again.
"I felt betrayed." Richard explained. "He left me without as much as a simple phone call and now he returns out of the blue only to come and uproot the life I'd struggled to build without him." he said. "But I was a child and no one really cared what I thought, nor did I make my thoughts known to those around me."
"Why not?" Lacey inquired.
"I was kid I didn't think many would listen." answered Richard.
Richard continued the story, telling Lacey that his father moved him to a small town similar to Storybrooke in Virginia called Mystic Falls. He told Lacey that it wasn't hard to get used to since the towns were so similar and all that was missing from his life was the presence of his aunt and grandparents. Shortly after moving to Mystic Falls Richard and Malcolm's small family grew by one when Malcolm wed a fiery red head woman named Zelena.
"Or as I prefer to call her: The Wicked Bitch of the West."
Lacey giggled, "I take it she wasn't all that kind?"
"Not at all." he confirmed.
Zelena was a wicked woman who uprooted their family for the worst. She started by removing Richard from the public school system and homeschooling him where she would beat and torture him if he were to get something wrong. She also went as far as to throw parties and invite friends over where young Richard was exposed to things such as drugs and alcohol.
"It was during one of these parties where I was sexually abused and assaulted by one of her 'friends'. I kept the incident to myself until my father came home when I blurted it out in front of her. Boy was she furious! But I didn't care, it got her imprisoned and it was enough for my father to send me back to Storybrooke. I endured much after the incident. Paranoia, night sweats, nightmares, PTSD, lack of appetite, depression, the list goes on." he said.
"I am so sorry." she whispered.
"It's not your fault Lacey." he said with sympathy. As tears trickled down her glorious face he made an unspoken vow to help this girl no matter how long it took.
"I know but I'm sorry anyway."
"Thank you." he said genuinely. They stayed silent for a moment looking in another's eyes.
Richard cleared his throat, uncomfortable. Lacey nervously ran her hand through her reddish brown mane.
"Shall I continue?" he asked not looking her in the eye.
"Yes." she said doing the same.
Richard explained to Lacey that after returning to Storybrooke he was enrolled in school where a kind teacher named Mary Margaret Blanchard assisted him after Zelena's poor 'teaching'. His family also had him see the town shrink, Archibald Hopper or Archie for short. Richard revealed to Lacey that is because of Archie that Richard became a psychiatrist.
"I remember the first thing he said to me clear as day: It's not your fault."
"That was kind of him." she said with sincerity.
"That it was." he smiled.
As Richard entered his senior year of high school he fell for a sensual woman named Mila. Mila was a lovely woman and she was the only according to Richard who'd really paid him any mind. He fell under her spell almost instantly. After graduating from high school Richard and Mila became engaged against the better judgement of their families.
Lacey flinched, his words were like a slap to the face. Of course he's married, she thought to herself, how could she possibly have thought that someone as handsome as he would still manage to be available to someone like her.
Once entered their second year of college Mila became pregnant nine months later their son Neal was born. Richard couldn't have been more thrilled. After the child was born and Mila was released from the hospital and never seen nor heard from again forcing Richard to raise their son alone.
Lacey sighed in relief.
"After I graduated I took Dr. Hopper's place as the town shrink after he retired and here we are."
"You've had quite the life Dr. Gold."
"Please call me Richard. I hardly think my attending an overpriced college qualifies me as a doctor. Now Belle I do believe that we had a deal it's time for you to open up."
Author's Note: This story was written as a part of the RumBellers Creative Group Project. I have at least two more chapters to write before I am finished. Thank you very much Nicole for including me in this and inviting me
