A/N: Teresa Spencer's character is an intriguing one. Especially because of her history with Daniel. This is my version of her story. For some reason this sort of tragedy appeals greatly to me.
My beta is currently off having fun so all mistakes in here are my own.
Disclaimer: I do not own Lost. Obviously. Or else, as I've said before, Daniel would not be dead.
Only Cruel Fate
Theresa Spencer had never been touched, kissed, liked, asked out and definitely never been loved. She was nearly twenty-six years old.
All of her friends had received their first kiss by the time they were sixteen. Ten years later, and she was still waiting All of her friends had had at least one boyfriend by the time they had moved on to university. No boy had ever even looked at her.
She often wondered why.
Maybe it was not such a wonder after all. She wasn't pretty, skinny or bubbly. She was as plain as they came – except for her brain. She knew her intelligence surpassed normal levels. But hungry for affection, she would have gladly given up her brains for even just one loving glance.
By the time she went to graduate school she had given up hope. There were some people in the world just destined to end up alone. She was one of them. She wondered if these people could ever be happy as they spent their life alone. But maybe that was why people said that life was unfair.
Her heart had already broken twice. Once it happened in secondary school and once at university. She was not sure she would survive if it happened again. Theresa knew it sounded melodramatic, but it was the truth.
Now, studying for her doctorate, she was done thinking about it. Her life traveled on a single track. A single monotonous track. All she had was her research. What else was there?
The physics department at Oxford was one of the best in the world and that was where she'd be doing this research. It really was the one bright spot in her life. Now she could focus solely on theories, equations, math, and algorithms. She needed nothing else. Well, she convinced herself that it was all she needed.
But then one day, he came and she knew her heart would break again. Someone was punishing her for some past deeds. He was skinny and stood at average height. He always wore a skinny black tie with a wrinkled white shirt. Though his appearance may have been ruffled, his eyes were sharp. When he immersed himself in a project, he fell so deep in that there was no climbing out.
They both worked in such a similar pattern; she and Daniel Faraday. Eventually they began working together because their attempts at manipulating space-time began with the same ideas. They ended up research partners and spent countless house holed up in a lab together.
Everyday her heart broke a little more. She loved him but she knew, in the deep recesses of her mind, that was no happy ending.
One day he kissed her. She was twenty-seven. That one bumbling touch was enough for all the years when she cried over the lack of companionship.
Their research progressed better than either could have imagined. And he loved her. He actually loved her. She never thought that she would ever experience that. He was no Romeo. And they rarely went out anywhere. They just worked together. But that was all she needed.
Even in her wildest dreams she could never have thought that their research would yield such a result. Their project was ready for a human subject. Time travel within consciousness would be possible. She wanted to try it. But he would not let her.
"I'm going first," he said adamantly.
Maybe he was some form of belated chivalry.
And it had worked. His consciousness had gone for a moment. And when he returned he kissed her hard. He had gone back to meeting her for the first time. He told her it was the best moment of his life.
Her turn. She tried next. Her journey was not as fortunate. She went back to when was nineteen years old and hoping to die. Her heart was breaking for the second time. She felt her consciousness jumping away from such a painful time; jumping and trying to make it back to Daniel. She could see him, but she could not get back.
And then only blackness.
It was destiny. Being a scientist she had never believed in destiny, but what else could this be? She was one of those people destined to die alone. Now she was stuck in time reliving the worst of her life. The years without Daniel were torture. They were when no one loved her. But the years with Daniel were worse – they rubbed salt in the wounds of a lost love.
No equation could solve this. No choice could save her.
There was only cruel fate playing with her glasslike heart.
